Chapter 16: Gathering of Witches

What was it with the moon over this island? It looked a hundred times bigger than it did in the city. Maybe it was the wide open sky, the Milky Way arcing across the ocean, how light pollution from the nearby picturesque capital of Charlottetown didn't touch the stunning expanse of black overhead. I felt kind of exposed actually, much more so than when I was protected by the sheltering walls of buildings around me. The big city was a long way from here but no so my heart, I guess. Poetic. Who, me?

I kind of liked it.

The audible laughter and clinking glass, the crackling of fire set the soundscape for the dancing orange of flames in the distance that lured me onward. I'd left my camera in the car despite myself-the thing felt like it had become part of me the last little while-and the stretch of lonely beach and the bonfire surrounded by witches reminded me of another less comfortable experience. One that I'd gratefully deleted from the memory of the camera. If only it was so easy to erase from my own.

Hopefully these Lovely Witches weren't planning to get naked.

I paused at the edge of the light with a final stumbling step, shocked to feel my throat tightening, chest heavy and wondering at the emotion I was feeling all of a sudden. Surely it had nothing to do with how the witches gathered around the fire looked so happy, so peaceful, so in tune with who they were. Because I was put together, right? I had everything sorted out and knew who I was and where life was taking me.

Yeah. Sure, Reese.

But it was more than jealousy for their utter comfort with themselves and each other, beyond the sense they chose not to doubt and instead embraced their truths. In that instant I realized that crazy or not, their thinking they were really witches and magic could happen gave them the kind of comfort and sense of belonging that radiated from them like a powerful spell.

And even though I struggled with their chosen identity, I liked their brand of nut job.

Vine noticed me first, waving with her usual enthusiasm, rushing toward me. Her contact broke the still prison of my emotions, fingers clutching a mason jar filled to the brim with clear liquid and the other grasping my hand for a moment. When she hugged me, her drink sloshed onto my bare arm, the coldness of it making me shiver and the pure alcohol fumes bringing tears to my eyes.

"There you are!" Vine's arms released me so fast I staggered like I was the one swilling moonshine, her hand clasping mine once more while she tugged me toward the fire. I went with her, feet reluctant with yearning for something I never thought I could have, heart still aching. I coughed a bit on the waft of smoke that reached me, grateful for the excuse for my budding tears, while the other two waved and beckoned me closer.

"It's so nice to see you, lovely," Rosary said, her auburn hair glowing in the firelight, that spooky kind of natural aura she emanated in full bloom. I inhaled, this time catching a giant lungful of salt air, and felt my tension and anxiety release along with the hurt I carried every day. I wasn't sure if I should be grateful for the full view of that pain or not, but regardless, there was an opportunity to drown it in the contents of Vine's mason jar.

"Thanks for inviting me." I really meant it, surprised at the soft and hesitant question behind my statement. But was I welcome or was this part of the job?

Vine let me go, raising her impromptu glass, saluting the others. "Hola, witches!" Rosary and the usually silent Piper both raised their own.

"WHOO!"

My rather childlike fear of being rejected vanished as I laughed at their abandon. Where had they been all my life?

Vine spun toward me and pressed the bottle into my hand, lifting it forcefully toward my mouth.

I didn't fight her physically, though I figured I should at least put up some kind of vocal resistance. "You're not going to get me wasted and make me dance around the fire, are you?" I was only half joking. Visions of Zephira and her coven of crazies meandered without warning or consent into my mind and I shuddered away the memory, taking the jar and saluting Vine with it. "Ah, what the hell." It had been a long time since I let myself actually get inebriated and tonight seemed like a great opportunity to forget for a little while. My loneliness, the connection I was missing? These women had in spades. And the frustration building day after day as I observed them giving me just enough and yet never enough.

Drinking my irritation at their secrecy away seemed like a great option. But, did I trust these women to take care of me if I had a little too much to drink? And, better yet, did hanging with them while their guard was down offer me an opportunity to dig out important information I could use for the documentary? The answer was yes to both, though only the latter made me wince inwardly with a sudden twinge of guilt.

Oh, get over yourself, MacDonald. Do your damned job already.

"That a girl," Vine said, winking and making no move to retrieve the jar. It was about three quarters full, a sixteen ounce pint of fume laden, home grown goodness.

I took a swig, pretty sure I knew what was in the bottle. Choked on the vile stuff, gagged a little, swallowed anyway, but kept it in my hot little hand. "That is disgusting."

Their hooting and hollering told me I had just been initiated into some kind of moonshine goddess witchy spellcasting clique and I was okay with that. For tonight at least.

Piper came to me, black jeans, black jacket, black hair absorbing the light around her, though the fire shone in her eyes. "Sisters." I'd never seen her look so emotional. Happy. Clearly she'd been drinking the witches brew for a while before I got here. I guess even Piper could loosen up with enough alcohol in her body.

"I've never had a sister." Now where the hell did that whininess come from? I took another sip, feeling my whole body tingle from the addition of alcohol to my system. And whoops. I'd missed dinner. Better go easy on this stuff. "Or anything really."

Rosary rushed toward me and embraced me, staggering slightly but still in control of herself.

I didn't mind her hug as I had minded Zephira's, for obvious reasons. At least Rosary didn't puke on my shoes. "Oh, you poor darling. Well, you have us now."

I did? I sipped again, heart opening. I did!

That triggered Vine and Piper to shout, "Sisters forever!" And proceed to howl at the moon. Why did that make me laugh hysterically? Oh dear. The stuff was getting to me already.

Surely there were snacks around here somewhere? I took another swig and giggled myself. So uncharacteristic of me, but I rather liked the sound and the sensation. "Darling." I snorted. "That's what Zephira called me. Oh my Goddess, you should have seen her." The swear kind of slipped out, now where did that reference come from? Felt pretty natural to me. I shrugged off the influence of the witches on my cursing vocabulary and mimicked the crazy old witch woman, gliding toward them before fake puking on Vine's shoes.

More laughter, though not derisive or cruel, no disdain in them. Simply good humor. "I just can't believe you fell for that nonsense." Rosary turned her nose up but grinned to cut the arrogance of her words.

"Hey, I warned her about Zephira." Piper swallowed a large gulp from her own jar, wiping her mouth on the cuff of her black jacket. "But did she listen? No." I was expecting judgment in her eyes. We hadn't parted ways on the best of terms the last time I saw her. But instead of more of the anger she'd shown me, she smiled like she meant to tease instead of chastise.

That began another howl of, "Noooo!" from the other two.

"Everyone knows she's a fake, you silly witch." Vine booped me on the nose. Did she really just boop me on the nose?

"Hey, did you just call me a witch?" Another swig went down much more smoothly than it probably should have. I thought this stuff didn't taste very good but hey, it was actually appealing to me. I did have to find something to eat. In a bit.

Piper put her arm around my shoulders and winked at the others. I liked this softer, kinder Goth goddess. "Let's say for tonight we make you an honorary witch."

That offer should have made me uncomfortable. Her suggestion should have concerned me they were trying to indoctrinate me into their crazy ass cult. But, you know what? I never belonged anywhere before. I'd never had that feeling of family or welcome or community. Even with my film friends, even in high school. Even with my own father after my mother died when I was little. And not even with him when he was passing from cancer. That grounded feeling of belonging had always been lacking. I'd taken it to mean I was broken, there was something wrong with me. But, could it be I just hadn't found my people?

Snort. So my people were crackpots. Figured.

And so, fed by the witches brew or my own strange alteration since coming to Prince Edward Island, I embraced this chance to be part of something. As she said, it was just for tonight.

"Cool. But we're rock 'n roll witches, though, right?" Because I had to be a goofball about it. "Oh, but hey, how do I even know you all aren't full of the same genre of bull crap as that Zepheroni chick?" I giggled at the oh so clever nickname I'd come up with on the spot because I was clever, yo. And funny, too. And why wouldn't they want me? I was awesome. "Show me some magic, witches!"

I wasn't really expecting anything from them, of course. It wasn't like magic was real. But when they roared the word WITCHES into the sky, I was positive I saw pink sparkles in the fire. Yeah. Witches brew. I had to get me some more of this stuff.

Like a punch to the gut, everything went dark. Okay, that was so dramatic. But the bright shiny of the past little while, the feeling of belonging, died in a wave of nervousness and judgment. I had lost my mind, clearly. What the hell was I even thinking? I stared down into the jar and the witches brew there, positive a black film passed over the surface. I almost discarded it, disgusted with myself and my faith in strangers. I'd learned better. I knew better. Trust didn't come easy when life showed you over and over again you weren't worth much.

I glanced up with my stomach in knots and froze. Why were they staring at me like that? Did they sense the shift in my mood? Had to. I couldn't even muster a fake smile, the familiar feeling of darkness hovering around me as I stared back, longing for what they had and all they were doing was standing side-by-side. Why couldn't I just join them?

And then Rosary turned to Piper and Vine with this oddly concerned look on her face. "Let's," she said. "Just in case."

The other two nodded sagely-if they could nod sagely in their inebriated state-and then Piper spoke, sounding as serious as Rosary had.

"You're right. Great idea."

When the three of them turned toward me again and stared at me with that haunting look on their faces, I almost backed off. Great, what had I gotten myself into with my over eagerness to fit in paired with too much homemade alcohol? Except Vine immediately got this happiness about her and shouted, "Yay, magic!" and cut the tension while the darkness lifted just enough I didn't run.

Not yet, at least. Should have, but felt myself captured by her joy. Her good cheer would be my downfall eventually, right?

They turned toward the fire and began to circle it, all their attention focused on the dancing flames while I sipped on my witches brew and observed them and fought the doubt, trying to be clinical and detached but feeling a pull toward their rhythmic motion. Like I should be joining them. Instead I stood off on my own, and watched with my mouth dry and my heart pounding painfully.

As they began to chant.

"Guard well the souls who gather here, no matter what we loathe or fear. Circle strong our hearts and minds, our bodies safe from magic binds."

And, just like that, the weight of my fears and hurt was gone. In a flash of pink sparkly feeling that banished the dark, I found myself grinning and swaying in time with their mantra. Wow, man. How did I get drunk so fast? Everything seemed suddenly blurry and kind of wonky. I laughed, though. I found myself giggling. And the chant really was very catchy and I had this sudden urge to start turning myself in the circle and the sky was so big and held so many stars, so much possibility. And that moon... ah, that moon could just drown me in its beautiful whiteness.

"Guard well the souls who gather here, no matter what we loathe or fear. Circle strong our hearts and minds, our bodies safe from magic binds!"

I was spinning and I couldn't stop spinning and every time I looked at the witches circling the fire they were smiling at me and chanting still. And this beautiful sparkling sensation came over me. I'm positive I saw pink light fly from the fire and hit me in the chest.

And I stopped at last with my arms open and stared up at the moon and I felt the most amazing I ever felt my entire life.

They came to surround me, still circling, still chanting and for that one long, glorious night I felt like I belonged. Like I was part of something bigger than I was, something that was meant to be, that I'd always been seeking and had finally found. Truth, faith, love, connection.

They might not have known they succeeded, but for the first time in my life, I believed in magic.

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