19

Chapter Nineteenth The Memory

"Severus Snape?" Harry asked when he suddenly felt the pull of the pensive.

Harry felt a bit dizzy after the sudden movement, he sighed gratefully when he felt someone held him. He looked up and smiled when he caught the worry look on his husband's face.

"You shouldn't just leave like that."

"But I know you're coming." Harry kissed Draco's cheek. He turned around and his smile widened when he saw that everyone was coming. "Are you guys following me in?" Harry smiled. "That's so sweet."

Severus snorted. "I followed Sirius."

"It's my pensive, Harry." Blaize mocked scolded him.

Harry only shrugged his shoulder and ignored him. "Hey, I heard something." He walked to the voices. "That's mum." He dragged Draco into what look like a living room.

"Damn it." A very pregnant Sirius hauled himself up. "I hate bathroom."

"Oh, chill out, Sirius." Lily smiled happily. "You only have another week and you will be with your babywhile I have to wait for another three weeks."

"Mum?" Harry walked to his mother. He couldn't stop smiling now; he finally met his mother.

"Easy for you to say." Sirius grumbled when he sat back. "You have poor James carry you."

"Why didn't you tell him?" Lily frowned. "I know he will take responsible."

"Yeah," Sirius growled. "Responsible. I don't want to be a responsibility. Beside, it's not that he cared. He left me on our anniversary of all day. I hate him." Sirius sobbed. He looked mortified by his tears and quickly wiped his face using his sleeve.

"Look, Sirius. Maybe he's been looking for you and couldn't find you. Nobody knows you're staying with us."

"Yeah, and the last time I heard he's taking his apprenticeship."

"So?"

"I know he's brilliant, Lily, in Potions I mean." Sirius smiled sadly. "I always know that being a Potions Master is what he always wants. I can't take that from him."

"What do you mean?" Lily frowned.

"Well, he would have to choose between his future and his son. I don't want him to hate his own son."

Lily walked to Sirius and sat beside him. "Now, Siri, what if he found out about your son and he hates you for not telling him."

Severus cringed at the scene before him. He did come back a week later for Sirius, but he was too late. The small flat Sirius ranted was empty. A layer of dust covered the floor and furniture, just like an abandon room.

Sirius turned to look at Lily. "He lost his right on the night he left me. I swear the time when he found out about our son will be the time when I died. Unless…"

"Unless what?"

"Unless Shane wanted to know him."

"Sirius?" Harry, feeling the distressed aura coming from his godfather and he wanted to lift it a bit, "You have breasts."

"I did." Sirius blushed.

"Hey, do I get to see you nurse Blaise?" Harry grinned. "Nah, where should I find it?" He was about to walk when he heard a masculine voice.

"Oh, shit." James Potter looked worried. "I'm not that late, am I?" He was carrying a box and a shopping bag.

"Language, Jamie." Lily scolded his husband.

Severus was surprised. The Lily Evans he knew always speaks softly, but now he saw a stern Mrs. Potter.

"We have babies here."

"Sorry, love." James cringed inwardly.

"What took you so long?" Sirius crossed his hands. He looked intimidating enough despite the bulging stomach.

"Well, it's not easy to find the ice cream flavour you want." James showed the label, avocado and jackfruit.

"Not flirting with some sexy thin bitch, are you?" Lily narrowed his eyes.

"Really, with two gorgeous, demanding," James added the last one quietly, "pregnant wife and brother I adore, how can I have interest in others?"

"He's clever, your father." Draco grinned, enduring the pain when Harry pinched him.

"Yeah right." Sirius snorted.

"Really," James put out the pizza. "Why are you crying?"

"You know how I'm always sad when I'm hungry." Sirius shrugged his shoulder.

"More like bitching." Again, James said under his breath.

"What?" The real Sirius walked to his best friend. "I thought you love me."

"Excuse me?" Lily raised her delicate eyebrow.

"Ehm, I was wondering if you want to eat your pizza first or your ice cream, though I don't understand why you would want mayonnaise?"

"Give it to me." Lily took the ice creams box from James' hands while Sirius took the mayonnaise.

All the observers except Harry swallowed in disgusted as Lily added the ice creams on top of the pizza and Sirius poured the mayonnaise generously as if it was a chocolate topping on the ice creams.

"Do you want some?" Sirius asked kindly.

"I don't know you eat that kind of food." James looked nauseating.

"Yeah, we have it at least twice a month, but we're running out of mayonnaise and ice cream, so we have to wait for you." Sirius answered after he swallowed.

"Well, enjoy your dinner. I'm going to make some tea." James was about to leave when he heard Sirius' distressed voice.

"Oh no."

"Sirius?" James was ready at this side. "What's wrong?"

"I think little Shane want to see the world now." Sirius tried to breath.

"Are you sure?" James paled. "It's a week early."

"Well, the mediwitch said it might happen." Lily reminded him.

"What should I do?" James worriedly held Sirius' hand. "How can I help you?"

"Call the mediwitch and bring Sirius to his room." Lily rolled her eyes.

And then the memory ended.

"I think it's time to go." Severus said. He had seen enough and his guilty feeling was enough to last him his lifetime.

"Oh, but I want to see more." Harry frowned.

"There's always tomorrow, Harry." Sirius smiled. "You may come back again."

"Okay."

But the scene changed again, into the later memory by the look of the babies.

"I thought we're leaving." Severus drawled, not quite angry since he too wanted to know more about Sirius' and his son's life.

The memory showed them the now one year Harry.

"Ah, Harry's birthday." Sirius smiled.

Baby Harry was laughing happily as his father swayed him up in the air.

"Stop it, James. He might throw up on your face."

"Let them have some fun, Lily." Sirius grinned.

Lily shook her head. She walked to her husband to retrieve her baby.

Sirius bent to look at his quiet son. "Do you want some cake, Shane?"

"No."

"He's not sick, is he?" James walked to sit next to his friend.

"Mama?" Shane looked jealously at Harry.

"Do you want something?"

"Papa."

Sirius went pale. "I'm sorry, love, but papa couldn't be with you now."

Shane didn't understand. He couldn't understand why Harry had his papa and mama while he could only have his mama. "Papa… papa." Shane raised his chubby little hands. "Papa… papa... papa…"

"I'm sorry, Shane." Sirius couldn't hold back his tear. He was grateful when James took his son.

"Well, I'm not your papa, Shane, but until your papa can make it here, I'll be your papa, okay?" James lifted Shane above his head just like he did to Harry. "Do you want me to be your papa?"

"Papa?" Shane giggled as James lifted him higher and higher. "Papa..."

Little Harry looked at his brother and lifted his hands toward his father. "Papa… papa…."

"Wow." James laughed. "Help me."

"Serve you right." Lily smiled as she handed a squirming Harry to his husband.

"I wish Remmy is here." James flashed his happy smile. "I bet he would willingly play papa for little Shane."

Sirius smiled sadly. "I haven't heard from him since we graduated."

"Nah, there's nothing I can't handle." James grinned at the little babies in his hands and attacked them by kissing them at their ticklish spots.

Severus paled after the scene. He tried to force a smile but realised that he only made a sad attempt.

"I think it's enough for now, Harry." Draco frowned.

"But Draco…"

"I know you're not tired, but Sirius is." Draco smiled.

Sirius only smiled, he wasn't tired actually, having spent days on bed, but he needed a rest from his emotional memory. He could see that with every moment Severus getting paler and guiltier.

"Okay." Harry pouted. "But you get me the pizza."

"You're not serious are you?" Draco frowned.

Harry grinned. "Don't worry. I won't add anything weird and eat it like someone I know."

"Hey," Sirius protested, "I was pregnant. It's not my fault I liked it that way."

"Are you saying that it's my fault, mother?" Blaise spoke, he now believed that Sirius was his real mother, and it made him calling him 'mother' easier.

Sirius only smiled. He gave Severus' hand a little pull. "Let's go home."

"You know." Blaise smirked at Draco, "There're many things you could learn from your father-in-law."

Harry frowned at his so-called brother. "Hey, since you're going out with Neville, I think we should tell him that if he accept you marriage proposal, Severus will be his father-in-law. I think he would be ecstatic."

Severus cringed inwardly. "You're going out with Longbottom?"

"Do you mind?" Blaise asked hesitantly.

"He knows no Potions."

"Well, like father like son, I think." Sirius smirked. "I hardly know any Potions."

"So, I'm the only one with a Potions Master capacity." Harry smiled smugly.

Draco gently put a lock of Harry's hair behind his ear. "Well, I didn't know that baby Shane is so cute."

"Yeah," Harry grinned. "He called my father 'papa'."

Blaise blushed. "I don't even remember it."

"Well, you saw it."

Sirius smiled at his son before turned to look at his lover. "It was definitely Lily's fault. He made Sh… Blaise called me mama. I tried to make him call me papa."

When they were back, Sirius asked the quiet Severus to make a duplicate of the pensive, and gave it to Harry.

"Really, it's for me?" Harry grinned happily. "Oh, thank you, Sirius." Harry hugged his godfather tightly. "Thank you so much. I love you."

Sirius chuckled. "I love you too."

Blaise watched with jealousy. 'Why can't he treat me like he treat Harry?'

"Well," Harry smiled. "I'll spend the next few days with this pensive, so if you miss me, just give a call and I'll come."

Severus rolled his eyes. "You're too active for a pregnant one."

"Then maybe you'll come and visit us." Draco spoke before Harry opened his mouth. "Mother and father also enjoy your company."

Harry's eyes caught the box left by the Zabinis and reached to open it as he casually asked Blaise, "So Blaise, what do you think of your real parents?"

Blaise was surprise but also thankful. Now he could tell his parents without being too embarrassed for being emotional. "Well, I wonder why my father left my mother, pregnant and alone."

"Hm…" Harry wasn't really listening, he browsed through the many pictures and shared it with Draco, and they laughed together.

"You're not listening." Blaise accused him.

"I didn't know he was pregnant." Severus said quietly.

"I wasn't alone." Sirius for the first time looked into Blaise' eyes. "Come here." He motioned his son to sit next to him. "I was angry, but I never regretted, even for one single second that I have you." Sirius caressed his son's face. "I love you."

Blaise hugged his mother tightly and whispered. "Thank you, mummy."

Sirius returned the hugged, he could feel the acceptance in that simple words. He looked at Severus and silently mouthed, "I love you."

The new united family turned at the Malfoys when they hear them laughed again.

"What's so funny?" Blaise frowned.

"This." Harry showed him the pictured of little Shane smiling amid the mess him made through breakfast. He held his spoon proudly as if it was a sword.

"Ah," Severus chuckled. "It's the first time you had breakfast by yourself."

Blaise took the picture and then he gave it to his father. "I look cool."

Severus only smirked.

"Hey, it's me." Harry shout in excitement.

"You look cute even when you're a baby." Draco grinned.

Sirius, again, explained it to them. "When Blaise was six months old, I decided to move out from your parents' place. It was the first time you two had been separated. Your parents took you with them when they first visit us, and you cried when they wanted to take you home."

"I don't know you love me that much, Harry." Blaise grinned, ignoring Draco's glare.

"Hey, I don't remember that." Harry smiled.

"Well, I think it's time for us to go home, Harry." Draco said without compromising.

"But…"

"No but." Draco frowned. "Do you want to bring the pensive with you?"

"Of course." Harry tried to stand up quickly, and grabbed the pensive, as if afraid that Draco would change his mind.

Sirius only shook his head. "Harry…"

"Yeah?"

"Although it was a duplicate of my pensive, it held your mother's memories too. You should use her password to use it."

"Is it my Dad's name?"

"No, it's your name."

"Oh?" Harry didn't know what to say so he only nodded. "I'll see you again later, Sirius, just take a lot of rest. I hated to see you so paled and tired."

"I have had enough rest." Sirius crunched his nose in detest. "And thank you for today."

Harry nodded and waved his hand as he let Draco stirred him out.

"Wait, Draco…" Harry breathed heavily.

Draco turned to look at his pregnant spouse and felt guilty when he saw that Harry was out of his breath.

"Do you want me to carry you?" Draco held him tightly.

Harry shook his head. "What's wrong with you?"

"I just can't stand one more minute in there."

"I thought you like Sirius." Harry's eyes were full of accusation.

"I do like him." Draco scowled. "I just don't like it that you had such a close relation with Blaise, when I didn't even know you. We don't have pictures of us or memory when we were children."

Harry smiled. "You are jealous, aren't you?"

"Me? Jealous of him?" Draco sneered. "You got to be kidding."

"Yeah, right." Harry smiled. "Let's go home."

"I'm not jealous." Draco pouted.

"I know." Harry turned back to look at his husband. "Let's race to our room, the loser had to do all the winner's wishes."

"You said it Harry." Draco smiled, as he followed closely behind Harry. Loser or winner, he would end up doing all Harry's wishes so why not be a loser and made Harry smile, hm?

Ö

"Well," Blaise stood up. "I think it's time for me to leave."

"We have many rooms here, you can choose one and stay here." This time Severus beat Sirius; he really didn't like the hesitation when Sirius talked to their son.

"I know, Papa." Blaise said happily, he liked it when his father's face changed into annoyance because he wasn't sure what to say to him. Really unlike the arrogant professor he knew most of his life.

"Call me anything but papa." Severus cut his son.

"Why not?" Blaise smirked. "Call you 'Father' will confuse me with my adopted father, call you uncle is weird. So it's Papa or Daddy or Dad."

Severus scowled. "Fine, suit yourself."

Blaise grinned victoriously at his mother. "I'll be back tomorrow. Beside, you two need to talk." Blaise winked and then left.

"He's more and more like you." Severus tried to smile.

"Is that bad?" Sirius asked curiously. "I know I've been such a nuisance this few days."

Severus knelt beside the bed and took Sirius' hands. "I don't mind. You may bother me for the rest of my life."

Sirius smiled. "Are you sure? You might regret saying it later."

"I love you, Sirius, I lost you once, I did something stupid and I might make other stupid things but please, Sirius, never leave me again."

"I love you too, Sev, I'll never leave you. You have to try very hard if you want to kick me out of your life."

Severus felt his heart lightened. "Thank you for giving me such a wonderful son. Can you believe that I had known him for most of his life?"

Sirius chuckled. "And you didn't know that he's your son?"

"How could I?" Severus lifted an eyebrow. "Though watching him always bring my mind back to you."

"Thank you, that's flattering." Sirius pouted.

Severus gently kissed the pouted lips. "Sorry for all the sadness I cause."

Sirius cupped his lover's face. "Stop saying sorry, Sev. The mistakes were partly mine too. Can't we just forget and start a new life?"

Severus only nodded, knowing that he would never forgive himself. "You're a nice person, Sirius Black, and you're mine. That's too good to be true." Severus smiled sadly. "Didn't you blame me for everything?"

Sirius starred back blankly. "Of course I blamed you. I blamed you when I was sad, I blamed you when I was sick, I also blamed you when it's raining, I blamed you for everything. See how important you are to me? I can't be without you. Who else am I going to blame when you're not around?"

"That's so sweet, love."

"You know, it is the time for you to kiss me till I ran out of breath." Sirius grinned.

When Severus kissed him deeply, Sirius felt so wonderful. He got a strong feeling that from now on he would live happily ever after. He couldn't write a better happy ending. His life had just been completed.

"You still a good kisser." Sirius grinned.

"Really? Tell me, Mr. Black," Severus growled dangerously. "How many people had ever kissed you before?"

"You mean minus James?" Sirius asked innocently.

"Wrong answer." Severus narrowed his eyes.

Sirius laughed happily. He loved to see the jealousy and possessiveness of his lover.

"Better be no one but me." Severus enjoyed the sweet laugh, slowly but sure the sweet, strong and happy man he had been falling in love with was coming back to him.

Sirius blushed when his stomach protested. He had lost his appetite drastically since Harry's birthday.

"So, how about dinner?"

"It sounds nice." Sirius allowed himself to be carried to the dining room.

Ö

When Blaise stepped out of the fireplace, his adopted parents were waiting for him.

"How is he?" Morgana's worry was written all over her face.

"He's fine, mother." Blaise smiled.

"You should stay over." Quinn said.

"They need to talk, beside I don't think I'm ready."

Morgana smiled fondly at his adoptive son, or grandson now. "Sit here, Blaise." She lovingly caressed his head. "We already change the certificate back. We think you should call us grandpa and grandma."

"That's weird." Blaise grinned.

"I know, but then you won't confuse us with your parents."

Blaise chuckled. "Don't worry, it had been solved. I just call them 'Mama and Papa'."

Morgana smiled. "You are a good kid, Blaise, always. But I want us to be family."

Blaise nodded. "I'll try, but I might forget sometime."

"We love you, son." Quinn nodded proudly. "We're very proud of you. I'm sorry for our selfish act but we want the best for you."

"I know." Blaise smiled again. He would never blame his adoptive parents, or grandparents. Thanks to them, he had a wonderful childhood. He would always be grateful for whatever they had done for him.

"We've talked and decided that you should live with your parents. Don't you feel like you left us, or something. You now have two houses, Blaise, you've given us many happiness. I know it's not easy for you, just remember that we love you."

That night Blaise could hardly sleep. Every time he closed his eyes, his mother's memory came back to him. He felt sorry for his real parents.

Sighed. "Well, at least I have a real family now. I have parents and grandparents. Ah, and brother too." Blaise felt asleep with a smile on his face. He dreamed about little Harry crying out loud because he didn't want to leave him.

10 July 05, 0:12 pm