Bisa

As I moved the skeleton of my new bed next to the window, I felt a gaze focused on me. Outside my window, was the house next door. The house shape was similar to ours, it had a window facing mine at the same level. Standing there on the other side was a skinny Japanese boy. 

As soon as I laid eyes on him, he stiffened, then shyly smiled and waved. His hair was all over the place, seeing him in his tanktop I thought to myself that he must've just rolled out of bed.
But wasn't it the afternoon already?

The boy says something but of course I can't hear him with my window closed so I slide it open. 
"Eto....hi." He tried in English.

If someone were to tell me later I'd come to care about him deeply, I'd find to hard to believe. For as long as I could remember I've always felt empty. And that emptiness, I hid on instinct. 

- an excerpt from Amara's Diary.

Amara's Diary

The faces of the girls I saw this morning were two among three more faces I didn't recognize.


Their manager Kanna-san, a tall young woman with reddish-brown hair introduced me with a big bright smile but the girls reactions were fairly gloomy.


I mean I get I'm just a rookie but we're going to be making music, and that's something super fun!


"So what do you think?" Kanna asked me.


"You listened to the original song I sent you right?" she asked me.


"Uh...yeah, but is it alright before we start I'd like to get to know everyone first. And if its not too much, I'd like to hear more about them and their hobbies and interests as well."


Kanna-san politely smiled but her eyes looked nervous. "I was told you prepared a song already..."


I nodded. "Ah, but if it doesn't suit their style...I'll change it."


The girl exchanged looks before eventually starting.


The first girl on the left went first. She was the second tallest, her hair was also the longest, it stopped at her waist.


I observed her neatly brushed hair and the elegant way she sat, she wasn't slouching either. Did she come from a strict household or maybe a classical musician?


"My name is Sohma Amy, I play the bass." she kept it short and simple, huh?


The next girl was probably the shortest, a girl with short lavender bob who wore knee-high leggings underneath a short mini skirt.


"Ito Haia. I'm seventeen and I play the electric guitar. I like... roller blading." she paused at the end and blinked at me as I listened. Right, she seems like the energetic sort but right now she seemed the opposite. Does she not want to be here?


"Fujino Anya. I play the keyboard." Girl #2 seemed to be glaring.


Girl#1: "Hirose Mio, I play the guitar. B-by the way earlier this morning, I sincerely apologize!" she bowed.


"It's fine." I was slightly annoyed, everyone was leaving out their hobbies but if they didn't feel comfortable, I didn't want to force them.


The last girl was the tallest, she had long curly white hair. "Hayashida Yoriko. Drums."


Only one person disclosed their hobbies, huh... so this is how they're going to be? Fine.


The girls briefly performed a set by themselves, once they finished I looked to Kanna.


"I see...well," I scratched my cheek feeling incredibly awkward. "I listened to your song and I didn't want to say this without getting to know you all first but with this song I couldn't really distinguish you from other girl bands out there. There's nothing that really stands out, your performance today also feels like you don't want to be here."


"Ah, don't get me wrong your music isn't that bad!"


Kanna-san seemed awkward. The girls made faces but didn't say anything. I think if I lied it'd be obvious though. It might not be my place to say those things, I shouldn't be like this.


"Hmmm... how about... I'll leave the song here? You can listen to the song when you feel like it... and if not we can worry about making one then." I suggest. I don't know what I'm doing wrong.


In the beginning, I had just planned on emailing them the song but Kanna-san asked me to come over and leave it. I assumed it was to meet everyone in person.


"I feel like I'm making them uncomfortable," I told her. "I'll come back another day."


From beginning to end, the girls only stared as Kanna discussed with me about what time was good.


I left the room feeling relieved but also frustrated. What the heck is wrong with them? Did I do something wrong? Are they uncomfortable with me cause I'm a male? It's an all-woman team after all...


Later at home, Kanna told me they liked my song and decided to go with it. It's a relief with this option I get to see them less... or so I thought. I felt bad for thinking that way.


Helens