CHPT 345: Find your Fault, Find your Trigger.....

Thursday Early Morning, December 20th, 2240. One day until the Longest Night, Ten Days until the Full Cold Moon....

The past two days were full of new experiences and terrain for Claude. Accompanied by a biting cold that was beginning to puncture his weather tolerant Lupine skin. Nothing too crazy-- but nothing to forget either.

The winds were growing harsher, dragging harder snowflakes with them like a storm of small frozen blades that cut through their forested lands. And the nights were growing longer, coming sooner, casting them into increased coldness that much faster. All of it must've been a nightmare to the nearby Villages and City goers with no heat.

But, it all paled in comparison to Claude's morning training.

It started out looking simple nonetheless, but quickly descended into madness. Quite literally.

He sat on a deck of the small rock mountain made inhabitable by it's flat cold surface of sturdy rock. His back faced the wide pond below and open long grass clearing beyond-- where he once stood and viewed the waterfall in awe and confusion.

To his right, the rushing waterfall raged, spewing from the mouth of the mountain above him like a stone titan cursed to vomit clear frothy waters for the entire winter. It's sounds had long been transformed into a distant splashing buzz that was almost tranquil when combined with the refreshing scents of water, minerals and plantlife.

Only he couldn't stay relaxed for what was to come. As simple as the training was-- it was somehow even more intense, on the inside, for the subject of said training.

Claude Grey, The Second Progenitor of Romulus, The Disciple of Fenrir, The Wielder of Wild Magic.....had trouble...falling???

The waters continued to rush and splash into the pond chaotically. He'd been sitting in meditation for no more than thirty minutes. He could now feel the sun on his skin from beneath his blindfold-- the sun that wasn't present in the sky when he'd arrived.

He inhaled deeply, leaning forward to press his palms into the cold wet earth. Followed by sending all his weight into his arms and continuing the forward lean until his lower body was off the ground and he was rising into a handstand from his previously criss-crossed sitting pose.

He stood upside down on his hands for a handful of seconds, smelling the waters in front of him that much clearer compared to when his back faced the drop. Now all he had to do was lean off the edge and he'd take in the thirty foot fall before abruptly splashing into the expansive icy pond below.

It was time for him to try again. To try falling again. To try understanding himself and ultimately understanding his transformation. Not brought on by the Moon, a pendant, or the chaos of conflict. But by his own will and knowledge of his weakness.

On the first day, it hadn't been much a mystery to figure out. He still had many holes in his game. But Arne had been there the whole time-- since the beginning in a lot of ways. And during those times he'd been able to watch Claude in a way not many others have.

Two weaknesses showed themselves-- two apparent faults that he would need to act against and conquer to possibly unlock his natural Lupine Shifting power.

One. Anger-- to the point of mindless ferocity. Maybe the trigger to his Lupine Transformation was found through the ability to bring forth a sense of inner calmness. That was Arne's first guess until he thought it over a while longer.

It didn't take him long to learn of it's inaccuracy of Claude's character. His anger was a reaction-- as most all anger is. But it was a recent reaction more so than anything. A reaction to adversity and injustice. A reaction to the twins, to Dolion and Jack, to Ronin, to Detective Cyrene, to Demons, to Fenrir. To all aspects of his life that pointed directly towards the end of himself and earth as a whole. It was new, and it would be anyone's reaction.

A much more accurate assessment came to Arne in the form of memory. A memory of their first time speaking to one another. When Arne had to explain to him what he'd become. When Arne told him of the gift and power Claude had received....and the naive boy referred to it as an infection...an infection that he'd use to avenge his father.

Despite it being only months ago in real time-- it was ages ago in so many other ways. Long before his many adversities would come to seek him out. Long before the spread of the gift and the guilt that came from it, and long before he'd grown to see that-- maybe even some Monsters deserve saving.

His problem was his aversion to what he was. His aversion to the commonly labeled Monster. Not a recent development either. Something cultivated through years of discovery and learning. Through his nights spent with Frosty and his Father, reading the valiant tales of the Hero slaying the Monster and saving the day. In many ways, it was fundamental to who he was and who he wants to be.

The Savior and The Slaughterer, The Light and The Dark, Control and Ferocity. Claude found himself placed somewhere between both and his mind-- and mindset, had trouble comprehending what such a placement meant.

A disgust for the monster-- and a sense of self aiming disdain for the perceived failure towards heroics.

From what Arne could see, Claude needed to learn to let loose and accept. Breathe, relax, and understand that he was a Lupine. Not a being of evil or outright good. Something of intelligence and freedom to decide with it's own set of urges that would settle through training and time. Not through man-handling and suppression.

In many ways, he needed to accept what he was. He needed to fall into the truth of his existence and sit in it comfortably. He needed to trust and fall....literally.

And that was all he was left with doing.

His arms didn't strain in the slightest as the cold beads of water rolled up his back, mixing with his sweat and gliding up his arms to fall on the stone sounding like rain drops.

"[Again.]"

Without a moments hesitation, Claude fell again.

FWoo!

All it took was the slightest lean and he was off the stone ledge, falling with the rushing waterfall at his side the whole time. He could feel individual drops falling on his skin like a precursor to the heavy splash that awaited him below. It would come any second, causing him to roll over mid-fall so his back would hit the water first.

As he fell, he tried his best to pull forth the idea of acceptance. To his surprise, Arne was so on the nose with the recommended training exercise it was scary. To not try and force the shift was about as hard as breathing underwater. He had to loosen up, and accept. Not just be calm or relaxed-- but understanding.

He tried. He really did. He tried to push aside his many faults and shortcomings. To not blame them on what he was, to not blame himself for who he'd changed. To not see himself how he did.

SPLASH!

Another failure. A failure that welcomed him as he crashed into the icy pond filled with a layer of crushed ice that turned it into a sort of chaotic ice bath. It didn't help that the constant fall of frothy water forced him down towards the pit in an attempt to drown him with it's immense pressure. It felt like the weight of ten men pressing him towards the bottom.

His arms strained as he held against the wooden tendril he'd pulled out of the ground nearby and into the water as a safety measure. The cold hard surface ripped his palms and tore through his calloused hands with each pull he made towards the surface until he was up sucking in heavy gulps of air.

"Fuck!...FUCK!" He said, punching the icy water before pulling himself out to stand on much warmer dry land.

Blackbeak screeched in disappointment before landing on his wet shoulder to watch him through it's left deep purple eye. Although, sometimes it looked like it was riddled with sickly blue fissures.

"SQRAAwk!"

"Back to the top I guess.."

"SqrAWK!" Blackbeak screeched in his ear again.

Claude stood up, "Yea, I don't like it either.."

He looked back up at the mountain edge where Gil still resided, laying down with his head over the edge. The Hounds eyeless face watched Claude-- surprisingly not with the same disappointment he felt. Instead, it was turning it's horned head like a confused dog as it watched him from above.

"You're so odd sometimes....." He thought before stretching his cold tired muscles.

"[Don't beat yourself up about it. Remember, it took me weeks to unlock the ability. It's harder than you think to go against and change your own mind. Especially when combined with any sort of physically straining action.]"

Claude nodded, "Yea I hear you. Still don't get this shit...I'm literally doing it-- I'm accepting what I am....where the hell is the fur and the claws!"

Blackbeak fanned his feathers in response to his raised tone, causing the birds wings to smack Claude on the back of the head repeatedly. Whether it was on purpose or not, he'd never know.

"[It takes time. Hell it could be wrong. But the only way to figure it out is to keep trying. But you know all about that already...]"

"Mhm....I hate boulders." Claude replied, in memory of his last strenuous training task before preparing to climb back up the mountain again.

Before he could begin, Gil exploded to his feet from above. Standing alert while he watched over the forest surrounding them. The Hounds nostrils flared as it searched and sifted through the many scents of the wild.

It must've found what it was looking for due to the way the barbs that ran down it's back began to shake and heat up, followed by torrents of green flames bursting from the many glowing scars on it's scaled body.

Gil suddenly looked down at Claude and barked a sound stuck somewhere between a hiss and a snarl.

Gil-Speak for his favorite meal. Demons.

Claude spun around and activated his Natural Vision, using his elemental affinity to see the world in shades of greens and black energy. Nothing. Just outside his field of vision.

In a rush he reached out for his link to everyone and relayed the information before taking off with Gil and Blackbeak in a blur due to the heavy spirals of steam that trailed off him despite the cold. A precursor to a Lupine in the midst of transforming....

He hadn't noticed it. He seemed to be the only one who hadn't.

"[Only two days.....]"