Snooping **** Chapter Fifty-Three

I didn't know Trent knew everytime Christy called or text, but he knew to look at the call log as I had. He was becoming furious and because he sometimes avoided me I did not take the pills, he was the one who encouraged me to take them. He knew she hadn't come back but she would send long threads of messages to my phone. One day he demanded to see it, I could not say no. He reached for it while they were coming in one after another. I didn't want him to dictate when I killed the bitch and had told him we had cut ties and I had not heard from her, for her sake because I would not initiate any conversations with her. I had a busy life, creating long logs for huge quantities of different apples going to various places were included in my daily schedule. One day Trent told me I had a gift, I could decode shit that isn't coded, but create a pattern within the codes that only I could understand. He said my time complexity for decoding had been off the charts and I could compute shit and mentally alter formats to form "codes". I had been able to look at things when I was a child and create patterns visually if thats what he meant. I could sequence certain images but it had never been useful. I'd write things and create patterns in my head to escape the abuse. I would connect the patterns on the wallpaper and play with them until Daddy was done. I considered it to be a mental defect and could only do so when I wasn't medicated. I never had the need if I was not under any stress, it was trauma associated. When I told him he said, "U are a number 11, its a master number, 6 +2+3=11. Oh, the 1+1=2, that's what makes the 11 a master number. it can be added again. Play with the children's birthdays one day, u will enjoy it. U have the numbers." He was 11-29, go figure. No other birthday in the year could give u his numbers. It took me a while to understand."

Oh! He meant my birthday, June 23, I thought and disregarded his high mentality. He had in fact been on to something though. "U could be real beneficial," he said. He was obsessed with numbers. The apples shipped out Monday through Friday, Lawrence came to stay in the guest bedroom for a couple weeks at the beginning of the harvest. I would respect his space and stay my distance from him especially since he wanted to know if Trent was treating me good. I had not even heard the doorbell when Christy rang and I refused to believe Lawrence didn't know not to let the bitch in my home. When I emerged from the master bedroom she stood in the living room, one of her lashes were hanging and she was drunk. Disheveled as hell looking like a damn fool, I wasn't with that drama and Lawrence acted like the way she pulled on me exposing my titties turned him on to the fullest, during the altercation he could not stop touching his dick. Christy walked to him and touched it, he was obviously hard. I wanted that bitch out of my home and hoped Trent would arrive. I was sick of that bitch and because my baby was screaming from the commotion I was fed the fuck up to the fullest. I knew we had history, but I hated I ever got involved with her. I knew she would try to set me up. When she told me she got out of jail on technicalities and didn't go into detail, I felt like she was lying. It had been Lorraina who Trent had referred to when he said they finally had "her". How the fuck did he know so much! I was so in love with that man but wondered how he could love me the way he say he had.

I trusted him, I also felt like he knew Redd from somewhere and was not being honest. He said something the day Christy came that disturbed me, "U better get a black hoodie and suit up if u have to, I don't care how u get rid of her. I know u are not taking the pills, should be a piece of cake."

That nigga made me nervous.

Lawrence walked Christy to her car that day, I knew the type of bitch she was and waited for Nakia to find out. She was bitter and I knew she would try to set me up, I now lived like she once had and had not invited her into my bedroom and marriage. Trent turned into the driveway as she backed out and he jumped out without even closing the door and stormed inside. If he had a problem with her, he would have confronted her was the thought, it lingered in my mind. When she left, she texted, "At least maybe u will find out where all the money is they seized, if that was true, never can tell about Trent, LOL!' Don't forget where u came from, Ill erase that nigga and u will be back in the asylum bitch, and tell Tobias he missed, try again."

I blocked that bitch.

One day Ryella pulled the closet knob and the secret door came open. I walked inside, I had been waiting to be nosey, Trent was outside talking to the neighbor. What I saw made me wonder who I had married. There were tactical suits, guns of all calibers, masks, different badges, and grenades etc. inside. I snatched Ryella back and closed the door, rushing away from the area. I hadn't known if it was rigged or not. His voice neared so I pretended to be telling the twins to pick up their toys. I rushed to pick up Deuce while he stood outside the door saying his final farewell.

"They invited us to their daughter's wedding, it's gonna be at the orchard," he said knowing I would refuse the invitation. I studied that sneaky bastard. My heart was beating so fast, he asked for a kiss just to feel me out, but could tell I was tripping. I remembered suddenly, where I heard "Breakdance"! it was the night I had been arrested. What the nigga had said at the pharmacy began to all make sense. I mumbled as I looked at him and could hear him asking what was wrong...

When I came to, Ryella was trying to fan me, and everything was blurry. Trent was pacing on the phone, TJ2 was shitty, the twins had broken a half dozen eggs on the kitchen floor. "Ok, she's woke! Ok, ok...thank u, Bye! Babe, what happened!? Are u pregnant?"

Get behind me Satan...

I was still so lightheaded when he picked me up and carried me to the room, "Ill call Mya! She will watch the kids, we can relax!" he offered. Nah for real, who was that muthafucka. Oh my God, I began orchestrating my escape plan, I had so many babies and this nigga had baited me in! I had killed a lot of people and Redd and I had killed someone, well...anyways, I hadn't even went on my spree when he first followed me! Wait, hell no! How long has he been pursuing me?! He hadn't wanted to give me a child, he just kept popping up! But he married me! I was so confused, I needed to just get away from him! What kind of secrets was that nigga keeping? My babies, I hated to uproot them from the stable home they knew but I had been played ! It had taken Trent a while to even accept the baby! But he wanted him to be his Junior! FUCK! I'll come back and get them. I couldn't drive the car, I was afraid to take anything he bought! Where would I go, that nigga probably had a chip in my womb! I had fucked up, I just knew it. I only knew one bitch that would come and get me, and that was Christy.

I was scared as fuck, the wind couldn't blow too hard I would nut the fuck up. He probably knew everything I had ever done and I had been gullible as hell, I hadn't even liked that nigga! What the fuck did I do, he had called me a spy, why hadn't I caught on? Carlita's brother is a police....Twan. OH MY GOD! I was missing something and I couldn't find out what it was at that home, he had too many cameras. CAMERAS! Son of a---!

"Babe, who are u talking to?"

"NOTHING!"

(Laughter)

"U look like u saw a ghost, come on let's play chess. It teaches u good life tactics. An old man from Africa taught me how to play."

"Ok, um, I gotta pee."

"Well hurry, I have a joint, I'll meet u on the patio."

FUCK!

I went into the bathroom and hadn't remembered the window being that damn high up. I could hear the twins talking shit and Twalla was saying "Hazel crazy," that's what Trent would always say, he had turned them against me! My babies! Lord, I will rot in jail!

I looked at my feet I was barefoot!

That muthafucka has been watching my every move! I can't never go out like no amateur, I gotta kill this ni---

"BAE! Who u talking to?"

"UM---"

"Hurry up! Im waiting, I want u in my lap while I teach u!"

I flushed the toilet. Where was my period, I wondered and wanted to pass out again. My heart thumped against my chest, had he heard me?

"Why did u lock the door Hun?"

"Oh, I was putting on a tampon!"

"A tampon, today isn't---"

WHAT THE FUCK!?

"I'M COMING!"

I swore I would make his ass famous if he tried anything, I put a pin tip rattail comb in the center of my bra and went to the patio and stood against the door. I could smell the weed, "Sit here Babe," he patted his lap. "I been thinking about a pond. Why are u so tense?"

I sat down, didn't know how to respond and luckily a star shot across the sky before disappearing, I pointed, but the comb stuck me in the belly. I jumped, and he dropped the joint in my lap.

"U don't need any smoke."

And he didn't want none...

He was giving me the attention I desired, it had to be time! They were coming, I knew it! I was willing to bet he had told Ryella, she was against me too.

"Where is your ring Haze?"

I loved that nigga so much and he knew it, that was the fucked up part about it all. I could not trap myself but I was deeply in love. Maybe he hadn't killed Redd. I looked in his eyes, he saw my fear and kissed me without a word. Then, "I got u, u carried my seed."

I didn't trust him but it was something about his eyes, I remembered them they were all I could see. He had been dressed in the shit in the closet. How could I ever thought I would be happy forever with a man like Trent. "Are u taking your pills, Haze?"

I said yes but shook my head no, "Come on, how long has it been? Why are u so nervous."

Capital Murder does not have a bond.

"U love her? Christy, yall were pretty close."

I jumped up and wigged out, he reached for me. "What's wrong, Im serious u need to tell me something, I'm not playing!"

The kids stood at the patio door, Deuce was taking off his diaper. I had passed that shit to his ass too. I truly loved that man and he was out to see me fry! U can have the damn children! Look at them, TJ2 can't focus all because u can't remember shit! U can't love me like I love u, I've risked it all...Oh my God, and---and I can remember u now, u bastard! U don't love me like I love u, I would NEVER HURT U TRENT! I gave u a son! I don't even want your money, I wanted your love never your money! I would have killed again for u! U don't understand, Im fucked up! The voices---he killed all of those people and fed me my grandmother's ashes, how could I not be A FUCKING SERIAL KILLER!!!!!

"What!? Why are u saying all this, u are not making any sense, I love u! Hazel---- what the fuck are u saying! Don't u love me? Ashes?"

I looked at Trent, he stood in front of me, his face was distorted! I had never saw the look before, but he was torn between emotions and was squeezing my shoulders, "I keep trying, u just won't take your meds, this---world, place whatever--- u live in is ruining me! The counseling is not working, I'm so infatuated with u, I can't breathe sometimes! I have to get away from u just so I won't take advantage of your beauty! U don't even make me feel normal!

Ryella slid the patio door...he yelled for her to close it.

"Don't yell at her!"

"Well talk to meeeee!!!" I was ripping my clothes, I had my hair in my fist... the tears were pouring fast. "I--do u love me Trent? I need to know now! U are like the rest, how could u love me, Im fucked up, u have to be just as fucked up as I am to love me!"

"Love u? I've watched u--- I thought about resigning from my job because I loved u! When I first saw u I---Hazel, fuck it. I can't take this shit! U can have whatever it is u want, I just---I need some time. U are not taking your meds, u just refuse to--- and Im suffering! My heart, u are stepping on it! Christy---God, of all people! U cheat on me with that slut, how dare u! She's scum! U are still fucking that bitch and I will cut her head off! I mean it so u better send her on her way, I promise if she ever comes back I will bury her alive. I will kill both of u, u will never leave me, u will NOT take my kids. NOW GO INSIDE AND GET THAT SHIT OUT OF YOUR BRA!"

He was crying and I was more afraid than I was at first. The kids were screaming because we were having an altercation.

"Do u know what I had to do because I wanted to be with u?"