Chapter Six

"Let's go," I said smiling.

"You're ready to go now? What happened to your scared alone time?" he asked mockingly.

I rolled my eyes and said, "I decided that alone time is overrated and that I'd rather be with you.

He smiled, "Thank goodness. I was starting to get bored over here."

I laughed as we walked to the doors of the restaurant. We had a fairly normal conversation as we walked down the halls. We eventually got to the doors outside. Two large men were guarding them. It didn't seem like we were going to get outside.

Alistair's eyebrows furrowed, "That's odd." 

I looked at him pointedly, "What do you mean? Were they not there before."

"No they weren't," he stated.

"I wonder why they're there now. We were allowed to see the course before tomorrow right?"

It did seem weird that we would be allowed to practice before the test. That wasn't exactly common. Not that I could practice anyway. I still felt like crap. The medicine did help, but my memory was still kind of fuzzy. I really couldn't remember much from the day before.

"Well, we were allowed to see it, but not try it. That's what I heard anyway," Alistair said sounding confused and a bit nervous, "I-I mean I looked earlier."

I heard him mutter something else under his breath, but I couldn't quite catch it. I didn't ask, I decided it wasn't worth it.

We both started walking to the door. Alistair seemed to want to take the lead, so I let him. He seemed like he knew what to say to people anyway. I wasn't the best at that.

Alistair stepped up the door confidently, "Why are these doors being guarded now?"

Well, that was blunt. I guess it was in Alistair to speak his mind though. I wish I was more like that.

The guard cleared his throat, "You guys must have not heard, everybody is at the grieving service. This kid named Bobby killed himself."

My eyes widened in shock. They glossed over no matter how hard I fought myself.

"Bobby Dignowski," Alsiatir asked in confirmation receiving a nod from the guard, "good. Isn't that good Eve?"

I felt almost disgusted by what Alistair said. I could see where he was coming from, but nobody deserves what happened to Bobby. Especially when it was known they were mentally unstable. I couldn't help but hear his last words run through my head. He said they were going to kill him.

I started to walk away from the guards and Alistair followed, "I don't think he killed himself, Al," I said theories running through my head, "He said somebody was going to kill him. The rest of what he said didn't make any sense though."

Alastair's face turned to stone, "What else did he say?"

I was worried about Alistair's change in demeanor. Did he know something he wasn't letting on? I doubt it.

"Um, he said something about you working with The Town for something bad. Isn't that crazy Al? I mean there was something wrong with Bobby, but I still feel bad you know?"

He nodded a frown etched into his face, "Yeah, I get it. But he was insane and a danger to others. What he did is awful, but not for the worse."

"Okay, that's not okay to say, Al. I know that you only say that because he hurt me, but that's wrong to say about another person," I said storming back to my room.

I felt fingers lace around my left wrist and despite my anger, turned around.

"Look, I didn't mean it like that. I'm sorry. There's just more to him and a lot of things that you don't see. He hurt a lot of girls, and I don't mean just hitting them," Alistair looked up at the ceiling, "I-I just want you to be -to be- I just want you to be safe Eve."

I was shocked at what Alastair said Bobby had done, but it wasn't surprising. I had heard of that kind of stuff happening. Rape definitely wasn't common in The Town, but it did happen. Disgustingly enough, it wasn't in The Rules.

I believed Alistair and wanted to forgive him, but I needed a bit of time to process everything.

"I forgive you Al, but I need time," I said truthfully, "I'll see you after the test tomorrow."

He let go of my arm with a look of sadness and anger plastered on his face. He turned and walked in the direction of his room. I changed my route and started walking to the ceremony. I knew not too many people would be there. It was one of the few things we got a choice in after all. I figured The Ceremony would be in the meeting place, seeing as there you could fit a lot of people. Even if you didn't need to.

When I opened the doors I saw more people than I expected to. They were talking, laughing, and crying. There was a large picture of Bobby on the wall. He was smiling and looked different. His skin looked healthier and his eyes look brighter. A lump formed in my throat, what happened to make him different than the child I saw in the picture? Life, I guessed. That's what life here did to people. I'd seen it first hand with my parents. In their old pictures, without me, they looked so young and happy. Now, they look old, tired, and sad. It was like they were fighting just to live. That's what a lot of people were doing. I looked around at everybody in the room. Some people's eyes were still bright, but others were dull and lifeless. What would I look like in ten years? Would my light be gone? I guess that would depend on whether I let it be dimmed and taken by others. As tears fell down my face, I cried not only for Bobby but for everybody that had their light stolen by others, by tragedy, by life. The sobs racked through my body. I didn't love Bobby, I didn't even like him. In fact, he was an awful person for what he did, but what it is choice? Or was he driven to this by society? Did everybody else make him feel so helpless that he had to do something like this to get attention? I cried for that. Not for him. For the feeling of being lonely and helpless. I didn't want that anymore. I didn't want that for anybody.

A small blonde girl appeared next to me. She was crying too.

"Did you him?" She asked sadly.

I looked over at her she wasn't our age, I could tell by the light yellow she wore. She was in the thirteen-year-old group. She must know his personally know him if she was allowed to come here for this.

"A little," I answered wiping my eyes, "he, um, he beat me up. I returned the favor, but he," I struggled to get the words out, "He said his last words to me. Yeah, that's not important though, you didn't ask. But, yeah, I knew him."

She smiled tightly, "I'm sorry he did that to you. He was my older brother, Bobby, he wasn't always crazy, you know? Something made him change. I don't think it was just him either. I think The Town did this to him. He would do this," Tears rolled down her cheeks, "He wouldn't give up like this. He wouldn't leave me like this. He was supposed to come ba-"

The girl broke down, and I hugged her. I cried with her. I wanted so badly to tell her that she was wrong, that The Town wouldn't kill him. That he just needed help. But I couldn't. I should have done that, but I couldn't. Because I didn't believe it myself. Something was wrong here and I knew it. But there wasn't anything I could do. So instead of demanding answers, I hugged the poor little girl. So I sat there hugging my dead enemies little sister, while I conspired that The Town I lived in all my life was evil. Maybe I'm the crazy one?

The girl stopped sobbing and I released her. I didn't ask her if she was okay. That would be stupid to ask. She wasn't. Maybe I could find something out from her parents.

"Are your parents here," I asked hopefully.

"No," she said sniffling, "They disowned Bobby after hearing what he did. I'm the only one here that knows the real him. I think I know why too, but I don't want to end up like him."

I could tell that she wanted to tell me everything she thought was going on, but I was skeptical. What if she was wrong? What if somebody heard us? We could be exiled. I'm not having that happen. No matter how much I wanted to hear what she thought, I had to think about my future. I still needed to be chosen. She was probably crazy too, right?

"I'm sorry about your brother-um-"

"Dayton," she filled in.

"I'm sorry about your brother Dayton," I continued, "But I don't think it's appropriate to talk about The Town in that matter. I hope you find a way to feel better about this. I wish you the best," I stared coldly looking at her emotionlessly.

She looked surprised, "You said that he said his last words to you. They told me his last words were about people being after him. You know he didn't kill himself then. He told you about everything just like he told me and I know it! Why are you acting like this Eve?" Her voice went down to a whisper, "He said you were different. You're just acting so they won't know, aren't you? Clever."

She looked so excited and I hated to have to do this to her. All she wanted was the avenge her brother. I continually told myself she was crazy to keep my walls up.

"Dayton, I don't know how or why your brother told you anything about me. That breaking so many rules by itself. I don't know anything and I'm no different. You must have heard wrong. Maybe you should talk to somebody to help you understand your feelings because you're confused."

"Are you saying I'm crazy? No, you're kidding. You have to be you'll help me. Come on let's go," she grabbed my hurt arm and tried to pull me somewhere.

At the contact, it was like the sympathetic part of me died.

I ripped her hand off of me, "I am saying your crazy you little freak. So was your brother. He killed himself because he knew he was an awful person. The town didn't have to kill him. So I suggest you do back home to your negligent parents and do your homework before coming up with stupid theories. I'm not going to help you and I'm not kidding. Stay the hell away from me, freak."

She froze, "Okay."

She looked destroyed, like a vase that broke into a million pieces. Suddenly my sympathy emotions flooded back. What just happened to me? The girl just stared at me like I was a monster. And at that moment I was a monster. At that moment I broke her. At that moment there was nothing I could do to fix her. At that moment I saw the light leave her eyes and I knew that I was the one that stole it.

I turned and walked away. I did what I was supposed to, so why did I feel so bad about it? I felt sick as I walked back to my room. I tried to push the thoughts out of my head. I did the right thing. For me and her. She would have been exiled if she kept talking like that.

I opened the door to my room and closed it behind me. I rushed into the bathroom and threw up. The nasty taste stained my throat. I walked over to the sink. I turned it on and drank the water, it quickly removed the awful taste from my mouth. It was almost like the water cleared my head of any doubt I had.  I wiped the vomit off of my face and looked at the mirror above the sink. My eyes still had life in them and that's how I'm going to keep it.

I might sound selfish and evil, but that's the way you stay alive. You fight. You take. You steal. At the end of the day that might make you a bad person and everybody might hate you, but at least you're alive. At the end of these tests, I'm going to get chosen and I'm going to live a great life. So what if I had to make one little girl cry to get that?

I laid in my bed. I wanted so badly to believe what I just thought, but I couldn't. I wasn't strong enough. I knew that I was never going to get chosen and that I ruined that girl for nothing. To prove something myself. Bobby was right the first time. I'm just a weak little girl. 

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"Give her the shot," a female voice said.

A sense of familiarity flowed through me.

"The aggression towards that girl was great, but it still needs to be altered."

That voice spoke again. I knew this voice. This had happened before. I tried to open my eyes, but I was met with darkness.

"I took measure this time. She won't be able to see us even if she tries. She sadly will be able to hear us, but it doesn't matter because she'll forget soon enough. This shot should be good this time, now only we will be able to trigger her aggression. Otherwise, she will be normal as can be. Also, suicide? That was the best you could up with?"

Was that voice talking about Bobby? And aggression? Was that about me? Was there something wrong with me?

The female sighed, "I know it's not the best cover-up, but who's gonna question it?"

She would be right, but not this time. I could find Dayton and tell her she was right. We could come up with a plan and do something about this.

"Um, how about Eve and Dayton? The two that we have footage of talking about his unusual death?"

I whimpered out loud, what were they going to do to Dayton?

The female voice laughed, "I meant everybody else? Eve won't remember by morning. As for Dayton? I think two weeks in The Punishment Room will set her straight. Now give her the shots and let's go."

The woman walked out, and I felt the icy liquids flow into my body.

"That's not good, " I heard the male voice mutter before I heard something clatter to the ground, "She's small she probably doesn't need it all anyway."

I felt some more pitches and then the guy was gone.

My moments weren't as limited as last time, he hadn't given me all of the drugs. If I could just make myself something to remember in the morning. I quickly slid the blindfold off of my eyes. I struggled out of bed and grabbed a paper and pen from the small desk.

My vision started to blur and I knew I didn't have much time. I quickly wrote down something I was sure I could figure out in the morning. I just hoped it would make sense because if it didn't I was screwed.