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By the kami!
I'm such a fool
What was I thinking
Telling him that I won't let him out of my sight
What if he thinks that I am interested
IM NOT
what happened yesterday was a mistake!
I lost control of myself!
I also had a bit to drink before the ceremony
But...he is beautiful
They way he walks when he seems to be nervous is...rather endearing to his figure
I need to keep myself in line
...none of this is how I ever could have planned
First my nephew Yuki refuses to give the house of Kie an heir
Then I am to get married and made to have the heir
...forced to hurt someone
Now...forced to hurt someone so pure and beautiful
I can't
I'll find some other way!
I have too…
"...Kyion this place is beautiful!"
I'm brought out of my wits once more by that silly boy and his nonsense, the bathhouse is old and mossy so hardly what could be called beautiful.
"It's old"
How else am I to respond to such a statement...how am I to talk to my bride at all?
He does that thing again where he looks as if he wishes to touch something but he pulls his arms into himself and looks like a scared rabbit trying to hide away from a fox.
"...but if it pleases my bride than it is good!"
I can see him smile faintly just before he swiftly turns his face away and smooths his bangs then I open the heavy wooden doors for him and we both step in.
The bathhouse is filled with warm steam and the rich perfumed smells of earthy sugi and sweet yuzu meaning someone must have used it just before us.
We seem to both stand here together for far too long seemingly both squirming under our skin but by far Suurin seeming to look like he may faint, perhaps it would have been better if I just took him back to bed instead.
"...your bathhouse is warm!"
I'm not sure what he means by such a thing for of course it's warm its a bathhouse.
"Of course it is"
At my response he looks like he wishes for it to be possible to retract more in upon himself and I can hear his heart speeding up...its almost like hes afraid of...everything!
"Do you not wish to be here Suurin?"
"I...no...I….its just that...ive never been to a bathhouse before...sir..."
What?...how does a Japanese boy of any kind let alone a Shiyūdōtai go their life not visiting a bathhouse!
And why would he call me his own husband sir...its like a feathery title… uncomfortable to say the least it's like he doesn't know how to address or speak to me but I do not know the same with him.
"Suurin...perhaps it is best that we drop all formal titles between us! I see no need for them"
He is silent for another moment but his mood seems to have brightened.
"...are you sure?"
"Yes!.... we are married after all so there is no need for formal titles between us we're both of the same status and house so at this point it's just a waste of breath!"
"Yes si- ...um Kyion!"
"Good then we are in agreement"
It's silent again.