I’m A Mess

Warmth. Warmth and bliss surrounded Harry. He felt like he was on a cloud, covered by a blanket of protection. He felt so safe. He opened his eyes to see he was in the room that had been deemed his by the king. He tried to sit up but immediately fell back down onto the plush softness as his head began to pound and his vision began to spin.

"Lay back down, Queen, you're not going to be able to see straight for a while." Hands press him down onto the bed, forcing him to lay down. Harry doesn't put up a fight, only snuggling into a pillow. "Open up, this will help the headache." Harry didn't think twice, only opening his mouth as the person told him to do. He was too tired and in too much pain to fight. He felt something being placed onto his tongue and he felt it start to dissolve.

"You're quite cute when you're not fighting." Harry felt hands running through his hair and he nuzzled into it, slowly feeling his headache fading away. He felt an arm wrap around him, pulling him into a chest as he slowly faded into unconsciousness. "Sleep my Queen, can't have you getting me in trouble with the King when he wakes up."

******

"—Oliver, are you insane? What if I would have been Louis, huh? He would have tortured you to death like Foster! Maybe even worse." A frantic voice enters Harry's sluggish mind as he slowly began to regain consciousness. He tried to open his eyes, to see where he was, but he couldn't. All he could feel was cold air on his body, but he was still on the most comfortable things he's ever been on.

"That's why I drugged 'im, so he can't tell Louis who it was. Sad that he won't even know what happened."

"You were supposed to help him with the after-effects of the drugs, not try to rape him! You're lucky I got here before you did too much damage. Now, I'm leaving before I get dragged into this because I was here, you'd be smart to leave while he's still too dazed to identify you." A door slammed, but Harry didn't dare open his eyes. He heard a man let out a sigh only to feel a hand on his forehead.

"I guess you'll be fine, fucking George had to ruin the fun we could have had." He felt the hand leave his head and then footsteps retreat toward the door. "I know you're awake. If your headache returns, take the pills I laid on the nightstand. It'll help, for real this time. It's over the counter pain medicine. Goodbye, my Queen." The sound of the door shutting has Harry letting out a breath of relief, still struggling to open his eyes. He used his arms to push himself up, the soft, dim lighting still hurt his aching eyes as he was slowly able to open them. He looked around in a haze, realizing it was his room that he was in.

"Fuck, I feel like I was hit by a fucking truck," Harry hissed out in pain, noticing the pills that the man, Oliver, said would help him. He's not going to take it, though. He couldn't possibly trust that they were over the counter and nonaddictive. But as the stabbing pain in his head began to grow, the little white pills became more appealing.

Biting his lip, Harry reaches for the unknown substance, putting it in his mouth and swallowing. He relaxed, praying for it to work quickly. He laid back down and closed his eyes, too exhausted to even attempt to keep his eyes open. That was, until he realized what he had done, what kind of drug he had just willingly let into his system without know what it was.

Harry stumbled to get up, rushing to one of the doors in the room that led to a bathroom connected to his room. He ran over to the toilet and shoved his finger down his throat, and forced himself to throw up.

He wiped his mouth with toilet paper, wiping the tears from his eyes. He's always hated throwing up and it always caused tears to fall from his eyes. However, he doesn't know if the tears are from that alone, or the fact that he willingly took drugs from a stranger without a second thought, just to get the pain to stop.

He faintly felt someone place their arms around him but he didn't pull away. He felt so weak, so useless.

"I can't take this anymore," Harry whispered to himself, feeling the arms that held him tighten around his slowly thinning body. He felt himself being lifted off of the ground and vaguely noticed that he was being put on the bed.

"Harry, what made you throw up?" Harry looked up to see that it was Zayn who was holding him to comfort him. He figured it would be. It's funny that Louis insisted that he was the one who loved Harry, yet it's Zayn who is constantly comforting him and looking out for him.

Why did he even take me if he wasn't going to at least try and love me?'

Harry tensed at his own thought.

'Why did that even cross my mind?'

"Harry!" Harry snapped out of the train of thought he was about to go down and looked up at Zayn who was looking down at him in concern.

"What?" He asked quickly, beginning to bite his nails. It's a bad habit that he's had ever since he was a child. If his anxiety grew too much, he'd bite them so much that they would bleed. Ironically, his anxiety had been so high since he had gotten there that he was too distracted to even do it. Until now, that was.

"Why were you throwing up? Our doctor should have checked on you." Harry looked over at the white door that leads to the bathroom.

"My head hurt so much and I took the pills he gave me. It hurt so bad that I didn't even care what it was." Drops of water welled up in Harry's eyes once again and the pain in his head grew. "I-I was so shocked that I did that and I freaked. I made myself throw up. For fuck sakes, the last thing he gave me knocked me out and who knows what he did to me," Harry rambled, rubbing his eyes as he cried. He felt Zayn tense, but he didn't care. He was more focused on the fact that he willingly took drugs after being injected twice with who knows what and willingly took drugs while he was barely coherent.

"Hold on to me." Zayn lifted the small boy up suddenly, causing him to clutch onto him tightly. Harry didn't pay attention to where they were going, but once he smelled the musky smell that sends terror through his body, he began to freak out.

"No, please, don't Zayn!" Harry pleaded weakly, the pain in his head and the weakness of being drugged constantly stopped him from being able to try to get away.

"Harry, you'll be safe here, please, it'll only be for a little while. I promise." Zayn sat him down on the blanket before quickly leaving him. Harry struggled to follow after him, stumbling into the wall as he began to use it as leverage, but Zayn shut the hatch and locked it.

Harry fell down as he sobbed, hitting his head to try and get the pain to stop.

'Welcome back, bitch.'