48

Chapter 48 Warm Welcomes

Lord Voldemort only had one question in response to the information presented to him by the man kneeling at his feet, "Who is Severus Snape?"

Severus was worried. There was too much going on. He could delay his plans for Black, but if that was not important, what was?

He was able to prepare the poker for Black and hide it from Lily. From what he had read, veelas brought out an irrational jealousy in men. Besides the obvious problem of no man being able to say 'no' to them. Severus did not need her here and pretty pleasing her and Black out of the castle and all the way back to France or Ireland or the Netherlands. They were rather close when the charm let him know that the first bouquet had been delivered.

Composing bad poetry was harder than he thought. His brain refused to think of rhymes so dumb that they belonged on a lavatory wall. This was the best of his dunderheaded attempts so he cast a charm to alter his handwriting to match James Potter's and to add a layer of anonymity to prevent it from revealing who really wrote it. Not that Black should fall for Potter writing this, but it was better than getting poetry in his hand.

I sent you this poker

To use on your husband the joker

Then come meet me and stoke my flame

I am ten times more than that bloke

And you are destined to be my dame

Because it will be my name in bed you invoke

You may mistakenly think it will be all the same

But you'll know it's me because I give more than a good poke

You'll feel almost as brilliant as me at a quidditch game

When our bodies rub together we will start to smoke

He also had to add a layer of complexity to charm these transfigured flowers so if they were in Black's hand when he arrived in the Gryffindor common room, they would no longer be flowers.

He tried to arrange for Black to arrive Saturday evening during his tutoring session, but the exact time was up in the air due to the Hufflepuff vs. Gryffindor match this Saturday. Not that he wanted to make his portkey so picky that it had to be touched by Black at an exact moment. That was too risky. All he wanted was Black. No matter what time he showed up in Scotland. The Gryffindors might hide him, but Severus would know when the portkey was activated.

Lily and MacDonald flounced in while he was working on his Runes before the defense group met. He thought he had them sorted on their fancy dress dilemma. He was brewing polyjuice potion for Lily and himself. From there, they'd be transfiguring, charming and layering glamours so thick that there would be nothing the same. Lily could be the test case for his medusa transformation, MacDonald could do herself, and they could try some on him for use on Lily later. They didn't need the polyjuice now since Lily would be Severus and Severus would be Lily. They were already themselves every day. The spells to transform them would be the same after the polyjuice, and they'd have to remember to keep drinking it discretely. They would not be the only older students making use of potions. Even though the fancy dress party was still a little over a month away, it was firing people's imaginations. Including the youngest students who were whispering ideas or being recruited by older students in their houses to help fill in large groups. Severus was aware of King Arthur's court forming in Slytherin since he had been solicited for the part of Mordred. A bastard from an incestuous union … the flattery never ended. He had politely declined and asked Black and Crouch not to let him know anything further since the headmaster had deemed one of the prizes to be based on students' ability to identify their fellow students. Lily was positive she would win that, and was obsessively learning the names of any student she saw. She had a good memory for faces and names, but wanted to know everyone, even the first years.

As their defense group showed up, Severus noted that all of them were wearing Wigtown pins now. The offer of an afternoon off of classes had netted them more fans, even Ravenclaws.

The group started off slow with dark creatures. Identification and protection. These had been covered repeatedly by their various instructors so it took little effort or research to rattle off how to realize that a hinkypunk was attempting to lure them to their deaths. They all had a copy of the testing topics and ran down the creatures with no difficulty. There were some glances at MacDonald when they reached werewolf, but everyone knew she was afflicted. It was not her fault and no secret was made of it. MacDonald never wanted to infect, hurt or kill anyone. Not like the last werewolf at Hogwarts.

Afterwards, Severus spent a sleepless night lying next to Lily in the Gryffindor bedroom. He reviewed every detail and tried to think of anything that could go wrong, other than Black never touching the poker. What could Black say? What could he do? How could he try to get away … other than the incriminating plan Severus had in mind if everything went absolutely perfect. It was not going to be perfect. Nothing ever went perfectly. Severus reviewed his alibis and explanations so they sounded natural. Why would Black even accuse him of anything? He was more likely to incriminate himself with accusations. Severus was head boy, and without the Marauders at Hogwarts, he sailed through the school without jinxes flying at him from all directions. He hadn't even had a black eye in months. Why would Severus drag Sirius Black to Hogwarts? Severus knew why. Sirius would know why. Would Dumbledore smuggle Black out of the castle and out of the country? If enough people saw Black, that might make it difficult for Dumbledore to explain. Dumbledore was supposedly a great wizard, the only one capable of holding off He Who Must Not Be Named. Surely a seventeen year old Sirius Black was no problem. A lot of people needed to see Black. Then it would be an easy choice. Dumbledore's favorite boy escaping any punishment again while appearing to be a welcome guest at the school versus Dumbledore's reputation.

Lily woke refreshed and resumed casting spells to try out looks for Perseus. She wanted muscular calves with a different body hair pattern. She complained his legs were not the right kind of hairy. They needed to be masculinely shaped and furred without being hirsute. She even added flesh to his feet. Lily had a similar problem with his arms, but had perfected how to sculpt them into heroic proportions.

After breakfast, MacDonald joined her in sculpting his face. Every change led to them wanting something else altered. It was simpler to alter Lily's appearance. His version of medusa was so grotesque that it was difficult to see any trace of Lily remaining.

They gave him a break and MacDonald modeled for them. She changed her face into a wide-eyed damsel with her hair now long and blond. Not exactly Greek, but she was beautiful with it piled atop her head and wearing a flowing white toga with a gold belt and sandals, and gold manacles on her wrists and biceps connected by a golden chain draped over her shoulders. Severus gave her a temporary potion to try for her voice. It was his third attempt. This was the right one with her voice gentler, breathless, and hinting of innocence. Even when they talked about the upcoming quidditch game later, it sounded like the next words out of her mouth should be 'save me'.

Everything got finite'd before they went down for lunch. Severus felt that out of everything, the girls' persistence regarding the fancy dress party would have them ready in plenty of time. It was strange what they preferred to think of as important. Prizes for costumes.

Severus got a break from them while eating lunch with the Slytherins. What if this owl was faster? What if they were closer? Black could show up while they were at the quidditch match. Gryffindor would be empty. What if he was further away? He could also arrive in the middle of the night. Either way, Severus could not rush to Gryffindor tower without an explanation. Perhaps he should have taken the time to plan better.

What the hell did Prongs think he was up to? Sending his wife flowers … TWICE now. And Apolline enjoyed good poetry. His poetry. Her husband's poetry. Not some dame and bloke crap. And a poker from the common room how stupid … huh?

Sirius Black was surprised to find himself standing in front of the fireplace in the Gryffindor common room … at Hogwarts … in Scotland. Had James gone mad?

Severus felt the portkey activate in the middle of showing the dunderheads that they needed to keep both sides of an equation in balance. It was followed immediately by gasps, exclamations, screams, and both MacDonald and Lily vowing payback as they took out their wands.

He felt that marriage and the experience of becoming well-traveled did not mature Black, and the silly goatee he grew did nothing to hide his gobsmacked expression. He looked priceless standing there half-naked with the portkey in one hand and a dead badger hanging from the other. Too bad for those assembled here that Hufflepuff won the game today.

Lily had been sitting on the back of the sofa bored to tears because no one was bothering them this week while Severus showed this study group a technique to do some barmy artihmancy thing about balance. Did Sev see their relationship as some arithmancy thing? He had used the word balance when talking about them.

Mary had taken out a slim volume of radical cosmetic charms for the truly ugly and would occasionally show Lily one. For daily use, these could be charmed onto jewelry with an extra protective charm to keep stray finites from ruining someone publicly.

Blinking, Lily thought she was seeing things. A shirtless Sirius Black was suddenly in the middle of the common room. Was that a dead badger he was swinging around? Some quidditch victory party? Hufflepuff won. And he was expelled, he couldn't just show up whenever he liked.

Wait, it was really Sirius Black. Lily did not have to track his sneaky, lying, murdering ass down because here he was, and there was little doubt he was here for anything good. This was Lily's moment to shine and capture Sirius Black and make him go to prison for killing Helen.

However, Mary was thinking along similar lines, except she was going to torture Black for turning her into a werewolf. This saved her the trouble of tracking him down after she graduated. Mary certainly had enough money to see Europe in style on that hunt, but if Black wanted to settle accounts now, she'd oblige him.

Sirius heard some old girlfriend claim she was going to kill him, but another female voice was vowing, "... slice off his bollocks, skewer them, roast them over the flame and make Black eat them." Oh, it was MacDonald. She always had a thing for him. Well too bad, he was off the market … what the … Snape was sitting in their common room. Not hanging upside down naked because he was caught but sitting his pimpled arse on their furniture … and he … oh no … oh no, he didn't … he had the gall to raise an eyebrow at him and smirk … wait till he got out his wand, he'd teach him a thing about respect.

Severus requested Phi attack the philistine holding the dead badger, and then let the darkness powder drop as he stood, taking out his wand. He carefully moved towards the fireplace, feeling for the heat when he located the mantle. Things did not sound like they were going well for Black in the dark, but he'd see how that turned out soon enough. For now, he had a little something extra in mind as he took out his floo powder and tossed some towards the heat. Severus heard the whoosh and leaned close to the no longer hot flames to articulately announce in a low voice, "Potter."

Both Lily and Mary were annoyed when the sneaky son of a bitch dropped some of that darkness powder that only the Marauders seemed to have because they claimed it came all the way from Peru. They were able to follow him though because the moron was yelling for "Prongs!" Figures that Potter would find it hilarious for the two of them to show up at the school they had been expelled from.

As the room brightened, it was clear that Black had run into enough Gryffindors that he was face down on the ground with a half dozen people holding him down while Phi pecked at the back of his head. It was a race between Lily and Mary to smash their feet down on his wand hand and pry it loose.

Severus called Phi off and she returned to him. He had strategically gotten behind the couch he had been sitting on to crouch behind it to use as a shield.

Meanwhile, Gryffindors were shaking their heads at him … Slytherins. Though if Black showed up waving dead animals and his wand, Snape would be the most likely target in the room. However, there was no reason for Black to believe they'd just sit there, cheering him on while he attacked the head boy. Things may be more boring without the Marauders, but now younger lads could use the loo and bath without any surprises. Their house also had some points in the hourglass. Maybe McGonagall or Dumbledore would throw them a few more for tackling Black.

Later that evening, Remus was happy they got back home. James liked eating out, having a few drinks, flirting with witches, dancing and all that, and Remus was happy to go along, but after hours of that, he was relieved to get back to someplace safe.

James resumed a topic of discussion from earlier that evening, "Yeah, our next game is sold out, Moony. I think it's due to me. I'm always scoring. I doubt I'm going to be a Cannon much longer so it's good I only rented here. And next summer, it's the World Cup."

"Uh huh," Remus replied. He had gone to every game to cheer on James. Since he was not as intimate with the game as James, he could agree that he did score, but was not sure if he was necessarily better than the rest of the Chudley Cannons. Why couldn't James stay with this team and lead them to victory, rather than going to another one? It was nice and quiet here. Peaceful.

Their domestic tranquility was broken by a pounding on the door.

Rolling his eyes, James commented, "Fans … I'll tell them to take themselves off nicely, Moony."

Remus stood anyway to follow James, he called hesitantly, "Prongs ..." Fans did not come pounding on their door. After dark? This late?

"Death Eaters don't knock, Remus."

Swallowing, Remus took out his wand. Who knew what Death Eaters did? They didn't leave anyone alive to talk about it. Killed everyone and left a Dark Mark above the house.

He overheard James complain, "You again?"

"Yes, James Potter, it's me. How has your evening been so far tonight?"

"Great till you showed up, Gumboil. Now take your goons and shove off."

"I'm afraid you are wanted to answer a couple of questions. Your parents are already down at the Ministry."

"My parents?"

"Hmm mmm. Oh and why don't we bring your werewolf friend along too? Maybe he can shed some light on a couple things."

"Hey, you can't talk to Remus like that."

"Like what?"

James grumbled while Remus followed along anxiously. Remus knew they hadn't done anything wrong tonight and had witnesses, but it was very disturbing to revisit the Ministry now that he was free.

Albus Dumbledore was quite upset, and Minerva's pacing added to his frayed nerves. If she wasn't in human form, her tail would be whipping violently from side to side. Horace was taking it better, sitting by the fire, having a cup of tea and a bite to eat to soothe his nerves.

This was the first time Tom had so boldly intruded at Hogwarts. This reaffirmed that Tom knew the cup was now in unfriendly hands. Rather than asking for the cup or trying to break into the Lestrange house, he chose the more expedient method of killing the current owner with the hope that one of his followers would be the next to inherit the property. It was a rash move to send Black to Hogwarts, but it also showed Tom's hand that he knew a lot about what on at the school. The school year was barely begun and this odd tutoring arrangement for arithmancy so new, that hardly anyone would think to waylay Severus in the Gryffindor common room … well, except Gryffindors wanting a bit of fun. However, there was no way that Gryffindors would stand by while Sirius Black murdered Severus Snape in cold blood.

The only solution was to let Tom know who had the cup now.

James Potter swore that if he ever ran into Sirius Black, he would simply have to kill him. There was no other way to solve this problem.

The immensity of the lies left him reeling. James did not send flowers to Mrs. Sirius Black. Not twice, not even once. He never wrote her a poem either. Those were the easy things to deny as absolute rubbish.

He had no idea why the Floo Network Authority showed a record of a floo connection being established between the Gryffindor common room at Hogwarts and his parents' house in Godric's Hollow. None whatsoever. James was living on his own and was out tonight with Remus.

Additionally, he could not answer why Sirius Black was overheard by witnesses to be yelling his nickname of Prongs in the Gryffindor common room earlier tonight.

Then the same old questions started about He Who Must Not Be Named, Death Eaters, and how Sirius and James were connected to them, supported them and aided them. Oh Merlin … couldn't they just read the old transcripts of his last time in here?

Out of the blue, there was a new angle about how James was known to hate Severus Snape. Pulled his wand on him upstairs in licensing, right here at the Ministry. They knew Sirius wanted Snape dead and tipped off his fellow Death Eaters on where to find Snape's family. James was in on it. James wanted him killed off for his master too. Why?

This was too much. James was no Death Eater and it did not make someone a Death Eater to dislike a greasy, no-good, Dark Arts-using oddball like Snape. In fact, it made James the good guy.

All right, James was not a Death Eater, but he agreed with them and their philosophy? Someone with a muggle father was not legally entitled to anything in the wizarding world? Anything Snape had rightfully belonged to full-blooded wizards and witches who were wrongfully cheated? That's why Black was going to correct that tonight? Kill Snape and everything would be fixed?

James had had enough. These asinine questions were going nowhere. Kill Snape? That again. Besides they weren't thinking clearly, if Sirius broke into James's parents house and took the floo to the Gryffindor common room, how was he going to break into the Slytherin dungeon to kill Snape? The Ministry had the dullest investigators in creation. And these knuckleheads supposedly attended Hogwarts.

These insults about the collective intelligence of Magical Law Enforcement earned James an overnight stay in one of the Ministry's miserable cells. They couldn't keep him here. He had a big, sold-out quidditch game coming up.

Although Lily and MacDonald had been charging around their common room with murder in their eyes earlier, their heroism faded as they discussed how and why Sirius Black had returned to Hogwarts.

Severus supposed this was the price he was going to have to pay. It got worse as they talked more about how their lives were in danger, Severus's life was in danger, and then could not ignore the fact that his father had been killed by Death Eaters and it was likely Sirius Black was one too.

They neglected the fact that Regulus Black sat here every Friday evening nibbling snacks while studying with them when MacDonald reminded them that every one of the Blacks was a dark wizard. She had probably said the same thing about everyone in Slytherin until she started seeing them as wealthy marriage prospects with house elves.

It was not payment enough that Severus's mouth grew slack-jawed and drool was about to start leaking out after hours of listening to the two witches, Lily suggested MacDonald spend the night. It got better, they should all three stick together for mutual safety. What if Black got his times mixed up and more Death Eaters showed up?

Was this some cosmic way of trying to force him to confess the truth? How long would they continue in this manner? How long would it take for him to scream out that it was him, Severus Snape acting alone, that caused all this? Eh, they could do their worst. He was tough enough to stand hours of this torment.

So it was that the next morning, when Prof. McGonagall knocked on Lily's bedroom door after finding Severus's room empty, that she was carefully questioned to prove who she stated she was before being admitted to find MacDonald, Evans and Snape had holed up together for the night.

Her eyes narrowed and her mouth pursed for any signs of impropriety. However the ladies were still in their clothes from last evening, and Mr. Snape appeared to still have his jumper on as she could see from the arm thrown across his face to block the growing amount of sunlight. Usually it was the Slytherin who was the agitated and jumpy one, but Snape appeared to sleep just fine with the witches in charge.

"Prof. Dumbledore would like … the three of you to join him for breakfast in his office." Minerva amended the request since Albus had only mentioned Severus.

"When, professor?" Lily asked. She must look a fright after falling asleep in her clothes.

"The headmaster is never lonely so take your time. How about in an hour … if Mr. Snape is awake by then?"

Lily took care of that by pulling the shielding arm and requesting, "Sev, wake up."

He yawned. Severus was quite tired after agonizing over his plan for Black for nights.

"We're having breakfast with Prof. Dumbledore."

Minerva saw the responding sneer. Perhaps she'd join them for breakfast. After hearing about these chummy teas, how could she resist?

His mother came to see him. Sirius rolled his eyes imaging what she'd have to say about this, well he'd straighten her out. "Mother, I had nothing to do with showing up at Hogwarts. It was either James Potter or Severus Snape that mailed me a portkey."

"A portkey? You expect me to the believe that? Why would you carry around some piece of trash till it activated?"

"No, it wasn't like that. It was a fireplace poker from the Gryffindor common room."

Walburga sniffed, "Mighty convenient for one of them to send you an item found in the common room. Well, I'm not going to beat around the bush, Sirius. I'm tired of having my heart broken. You are on your own, as your father and I told you less than a year ago. We did are absolute best, but you continue to throw that back in my face."

"What? What best? You never did your best."

"See, that's exactly what I meant. Farewell."

"Oi, you can't walk out on me!"

When Walburga Black did just that, Sirius continued yelling through the bars, "See! That's why you are no mother of mine! You are cruel, selfish and only think of yourself!"

With a huff, Sirius sat down. He didn't need her. His parents were worthless.

Further down the hall, James Potter overheard Black yelling. Sirius's mother was acting smart for once, or maybe she had known all along. Well, thanks to Sirius, he did not have the luxury on walking out of here for now so went to the small square of window in his door and shouted through the bars, "Oi! Black! You miserable piece of shit!"

"Prongs?!"

"Don't you dare call me that! And how dare you drag my parents into your schemes!"

"Both of you shut up!" shouted a guard, but that did nothing to silence the two former friends insulting each other. That's why he cast silencio on the hallway.

On their walk to the head's office, Severus reminded the ladies of their upcoming banner contest to derail their repetitious talk of Black.

"If Kennilworthy Whisp won't agree to judge the contest, perhaps Prof. McGonagall? That way either of you could fairly win."

"Oh drat! I keep meaning to work on that," Lily muttered. "Do you already have one?"

"I have an idea," Severus replied, "but I have not made it yet."

Mary made a face, and said, "I have all the charms I need, but I lack a really good idea."

"You are good at the pretty charms. Perhaps something with a snitch?" Severus suggested.

"You think I'm good?" Mary asked, batting her eyes at Severus.

"With the glittery things."

Lily moaned aloud. Severus points out Mary's strength as encouragement, and she takes it to mean he fancies her.

At breakfast, Severus had to admit that the older Gryffindors got, the more ridiculous their stories got. The headmaster suspected Black had been tipped off that Severus would be in Gryffindor tower at that time and showed up to kill him on behalf of He Who Must Not Be Named so the property he recently inherited would pass onto someone else. Then he added his plan to let the Dark Lord know that the cup was now in his possession by having his photo taken with the artifact and getting it printed in The Daily Prophet.

Between hunks of ham steak, it appeared both Lily and MacDonald thought all this was wonderful detective work and a brilliant solution. Prof. McGonagall had a small smirk playing over her lips. Severus knew that she knew when she smelled bullshit.

Glancing at the golden cup with badgers, Severus reminded them all, "It is my cup. I brought it to Prof. Sprout to determine if it was stolen. Are you saying it was stolen from you or the school?"

"Stolen? Well, the previous owner was killed for it."

"So how does that make it yours, sir?"

"Mine?"

"Yes, you are going to publicly claim its in your possession. Possession means it's yours?"

"It is an artifact from Helga Hufflepuff so naturally it belongs at Hogwarts."

"The previous owner stole it from Hogwarts?"

"No, that's not important. You are not understanding that people have been killed for this artifact. It's dangerous."

Severus understood perfectly. Albus Dumbledore was stealing it. "And you feel it's right to bring dangerous things into the school where parents trust you to put their children's welfare first? Cursed cups, werewolves, convicted murderers? If someone like Black can just drop in to the old common room for a visit, how many others are strolling through the doors? However he got in here, by floo or apparition, that's what you control as headmaster. You've already proved you care little for the safety of students so you want to let He Who Must Not Be Named know you have this cursed cup and that the doors are thrown wide open for any of his other followers that want to pop round to retrieve it for him."

"I didn't -"

"Well, what did you do? Did you fix however he got in here, or you going to wait till it's exploited again because what you really want is a Dark Mark over Gryffindor tower?"

"Let's calm down here, and look at this rationally. I did not arrange for Sirius Black to enter the school."

"However, he's alive and well and willing to tell his mates how it's done, if he didn't already tell them before he proved it possible. And you have done nothing about it?"

"We're still working out how he got in there."

"So the floo's still open?"

"It only allows communication. No one can pass through it."

"Then you allowed him to apparate? As headmaster, you supposedly are the only one able to grant that permission. Your old favorite says he wants to attend a party in Gryffindor tower, you say 'jolly good' and he pops up there swinging a dead badger for everyone's amusement."

Albus's mouth opened. How did Black get in? The problem was he had a Slytherin that was trying to outmaneuver him verbally. Severus could not have that cup back. He looked at Minerva, but she looked back at him expectantly. She was interested in why the headmaster seemed to not care how Sirius Black got into the school and why he'd claim Hufflepuff's cup was dangerous, people were killed for it, and he wanted to display it at Hogwarts when they had no idea how one of He Who Must Not Be Named's followers got inside. Having the students in the middle of this was not acceptable. The scenario of a Dark Mark over Gryffindor tower was not a wild claim because if Black could get in, she had no doubt that he already bragged about it to his comrades.

Lily was touched that Severus had been paying attention to what Mary and her discussed last night. He had appeared to be ignoring them. Everyone was in danger till they knew how Black got into the school. She added, "Keeping people like Sirius Black out of the school should be the top priority."

"But don't you wonder how he knew when to be there when Severus was there? There's either a Gryffindor or maybe a Slytherin passing information to Voldemort."

"That's interesting," Lily replied, "but it could be the same method was used to visit the school before when the common room was empty to read the bulletin board. I think keeping them locked out is important. I agree with Severus. A cup could be valuable, but there's probably plenty of books in the Restricted Section that are also dangerous. You've already admitted someone's been killed over that cup."

"I think likewise, Albus," Minerva agreed. "I do not want anyone unauthorized entering the school."

Maybe he should have invited Horace to breakfast, was what Albus thought, especially when he saw Mary MacDonald glaring daggers at him. This meal had gone terribly wrong.

When Severus returned from Slytherin, after having missed his study session last night due to Sirius Black, he suggested one more thing to Lily and her sleuthing buddy. "Regulus Black could have been the target. Sirius was disinherited, and the only other male of this generation is his younger brother."

"How could he get from Gryffindor to Slytherin without being seen?"

"Either he hides out in your common room having a laugh with the old gang until the castle was quiet, or he may have had a way to get up your staircase, enter through your door in Gryffindor, and then it would simply be taking all these stairs down through our quarters, with maybe a stop to take care of me while I slept. He would end up at the bottom of my stairs and be only two doors away from where his brother sleeps."

"His brother?" Lily repeated in disbelief.

"He is a suspect for the murder of his father, so I doubt killing a brother would be a stretch."

Their ability to believe that could also be what happened was astounding. There was no need for evidence, just conjecture. He tuned them out while he worked on his correspondence with the legal books he borrowed from the library. Even the backwards laws of wizards protected property. Crouch had been happy to steer him to the right books.

In his letter to Mrs. Evans, he portrayed Lily and her girlfriend as properly heroic, yet cautious, in last night's adventure and even included a newspaper clipping for her. After all, this was the man responsible for the scarring on Lily, her obsession with eating obscene amounts of food and a suspected increase in her sexual appetites. There were promises from Crouch Sr. that Black would not be released from custody for any reason. This time he would stand trial for his actions. Black certainly had a long list of suspected criminal activity, including an odd one of importing flawed flying carpets that intentionally turned completely over to dump all its passengers during the flight.

After that, he told them that he'd be in his room working on his banner. MacDonald showed no signs of leaving tonight either.

Helen actually inspired his idea. Parkin's Pincer being executed flawlessly by three chasers in Wigtown red upon a chaser in Chudley orange who appeared to be flying in circles while looking at a hand-held mirror and combing his hair. By a strange twist of fate, Severus portrayed this narcissistic Chudley chaser wearing round spectacles and having an abnormally large handle on his broom so the Nimbus logo could be clearly seen.

The sequence of movement was simple enough in his head, but getting all the individual movements perfect took time, including the miserable tailspin of the falling Chudley chaser at the end. He even added the large words Parkin's Pincer on the bottom to label the maneuver in case some quidditch novice, such as Potter, viewed it.

Since he still overheard the ladies debating Black's motives, he decided to add an annoying snitch buzzing around the oblivious Chudley chaser's head.

As Dumbledore stated, the headmaster's smiling visage next to Hufflepuff's cup was on the front page of the newspaper one morning. Of course the mention of an anonymous benefactor of the school donating it was a lie, but Severus was willing to let the slow wheels of the law investigate that.

Unbeknownst to Severus, Dumbledore had destroyed the cup using fiendfyre after the photo was taken. The headmaster had considered the danger to the school against the loss of such a priceless item, and destroyed it, blaming Tom Riddle for its loss.

Later in the week, Severus was further annoyed by Dumbledore and Slughorn grandstanding over his substitute for unicorn lung in The Practical Potioneer. Neither were listed as a contributor in Severus's copy of the periodical which was featured as the issue's spotlighted discovery. Any item that a unicorn needs to live is considered a 'dark item', and the standard explanation given for how it is obtained is that the noble unicorn who feels his end is near willfully approaches the proper maiden to have his body harvested for the good of others. At least, that's what the suppliers in Knockturn Alley respond when questioned.

Considering the importance of the life-saving discovery, both for people and unicorns, Severus got a bit of a write-up following Joe Rue. Who supplied this photo of him? If Severus had been asked, he might have found it funny to supply a picture of Davy Jones that used to be part of Petunia's shrine on her bedroom wall. As far as he knew, Mrs. Evans still had them around somewhere. His CV was woefully short, with only two lines, but it did mention his substitute for augury eyes and referenced last year's issue.

After MacDonald and Lily showed off their pretty banners, he showed them his. They laughed, but then Lily asked, "You sure it's not too much, Sev?"

"That maneuver was invented by Wigtown. As a fan of the team, I should like seeing it. It's natural for me to portray the opposing chaser in the colors of today's opposing team."

"The glasses? And the hair combing?"

"Potter won't recognize it as him. He's too cunning to fall for a chaser maneuver that's been around for centuries. He was practically born with that Nimbus glued to his ass. A true natural and an asset to England -"

"Sev, you're going to make us puke."

"I like the idea of a permanent sticking charm between his broom and his ass," Mary giggled.

They lined up with their banners folded with hundreds of other students for the expedition to the Chudley Cannons field to watch the game. Lily gave him a couple mischievous looks, but Severus restricted himself to a cocked eyebrow. This would be fun, rather than the way he felt over Black.

When they arrived, Severus figured out that Prof. McGonagall also spread their extra tickets to the Ministry for helping with Sirius Black the other night. This really could be Potter's time to shine.

James had returned home in a seriously bad mood. Remus optimistically pointed out that James would play in today's game, but that was not the point. Why was Sirius Black such a bastard? Yeah, James got it that he was totally fooled by Black's act for years. But you know, it was time for him to move on to bigger and better things for Lord Voldemort. Flooing into Hogwarts for a laugh was not exactly Death Eater caliber on the threat meter.

Eh, he had to get his mind in quidditch mode. Big game today. The Cannons should pay him more for filling the stands like this. They'd be sorry when he got recruited to a better team. And after next summer, and winning the World Cup for England, James would have his pick of teams.

The least the Cannon organization could do was fix up their locker room. It was disgusting.

There were a lot of people from outside the school that wanted to meet Lily Evans and Mary MacDonald. They claimed to have formed the fan club in memory of Helen Parkin. Severus preferred to hover in the background.

They were interviewed by Barnabas Cuffe and had their photo taken with Kennilworthy Whisp. Whisp was honored to judge the banner contest, and was frankly overwhelmed by the quantity and quality of the banners hung. His heart was ready to leap out of his chest with pride that the students of Hogwarts from every house gathered for such a memorial cause and obviously invested a lot of spirit behind Helen Parkin's team.

In fact, he was getting a bit choked up which wasn't easy for this old beater to admit. Beaters did not cry, even if they took one in the face … but this … and the banners. The dark red of his team … the pictures of cleavers … there were even beautiful ones of snitches … and oh, a Parkin's Pincer fan. It might take him the whole game to look at all these.

In the stands, Remus Lupin was surprised that there were a lot of students from Hogwarts, along with maybe most of the staff. Were they here for Prongs? And then it sunk in. The banners, and a lot of them were wearing Wigtown supporter pins. What was going on? This was the Chudley Cannon field, and Remus knew fans of other teams came to support their teams here, but … they did not fill all the seats. Why would … James thought … oh no. This was … amazing? Was that the word? The few dozen Cannon fans were vastly outnumbered by the Wigtown Wanderer fans in their own stadium, and from the look of things, it appeared that all of Hogwarts was here to cheer on Wigtown. Why?

From inside their waiting area, James heard the crowds. Much louder than a normal game. Might even be louder than when he was a star player at Hogwarts, winning the cup for Gryffindor. Today he was going to score a lot. As soon as he got his hands on the quaffle he'd personally drive it to the hoops himself. No way he was going to chance losing in front of a crowd this big, here to see the Cannons. Here to see him.

When the Cannons came speeding out of their tunnel to the announcer, James heard some jokers from Wigtown using a sonorus charm to sound like there was a lot of people booing and hissing the Cannons … and why did they let some nutter hang all these banners? Jeez. Someone mental must really like Wigtown. Probably another whiny Parkin.

As James circled to the backfield with his team to allow the visitors room to get briefly introduced, he thought for a moment he recognized some faces.

With a sigh, James hovered, waiting for Wigtown to limp out while running a hand through his hair, then adjusted his gloves and fluffed his hair some more. Really, who cared about who was on the visiting team? He picked absently at a spot on his broom handle before absently scratching where his hair lay on the back of his neck.

Lily thought she was going to pee herself if Potter didn't stop playing with his hair. He was worse now because now he was a professional hair messer.

The amount of cheering for the other team momentarily distracted James. This was Chudley stadium? He looked around at most of the fans on their feet clapping and hooting. What was wrong with them? Then when one of the beaters, another freaking Parkin, was announced, the volume increased. It was some old, beat-up wreck of a man. Who cheered for beaters? They didn't even score. This guy probably didn't even score with the witches, much less on the quidditch field.

Ah well, James fly around to wave at Remus. What was wrong with him? It was a nice afternoon. Good flying weather. No reason to sit all hunched up like that … and why were the other Cannon family members and fans that attended every game so lifeless?

Wait a minute, weren't that bunch of boys from Gryffindor? They were a couple years below James. What were they doing at a quidditch game … and that girl, oh what was her name, didn't she go with James to Hogsmeade? There were a lot of Hogwarts students here and there was Prof. McGonagall and … how had James missed Hagrid? What the hell was going on? Did they all come to watch him play? Oh, was Evans here? If someone loved to watch him play quidditch, it was definitely Lily Evans.

There was his favorite redhead and James swung closer to wave … and she was wearing blood red. So was MacDonald, and why was Snape here? Ugh. And they were sitting with all these stupid Wigtown banners hanging off the stands around them. Man, were they ugly banners. Did some primary school kids make them? Why did the Cannons let them hang them?

He flew back to meet up with the team. He passed some of his opponents, and thought they would not be grinning like goons once the game started. In the middle with the referee, James overheard something about Wigtown having a fan club. Who cared if they had a fan club? What did they do, offer students free tickets to cheer for them at away games? And why would Dumbledore allow all these people out of school for the afternoon? If James still went to Hogwarts, he'd be in class right now.

James got in position with the other chasers for the start of the game. It didn't matter how many people were here to cheer Wigtown. The Cannons had James Potter. Soon enough they'd change their tune, and if they were too dumb to pick up on a Cannon cheer, James would accept the old 'go, go Gryffindor'.

He was getting annoyed alternately by Wigtown getting the quaffle, or his fellow Cannon chasers not passing it to him. He was open. They were freaking blind. James chased after his teammate who was streaking across the field to take a shot and miss, but then he passed it to their other Cannon chaser, who was more nearsighted and uncoordinated than the first idiot.

There was a banner behind the goal … 'Wigtown Win for Helen'? What was that about? Smack! James was squarely hit by a bludger in the left shoulder and his broom spun on its axis to the right until he corrected it.

At last, James caught a dropped quaffle by the Cannon keeper. All he had to do was cross the field and score. For him, it would be simple. He openly laughed at a Wigtown chaser who closed in on him from one side. He didn't know who he was dealing with. The fellow was a bit mad because he was laughing too. Oh, James got it now, his girlfriend chaser was jostling from the other side. Well, he wasn't going to let go. James never dropped the quaff … Crash … their third chaser ran into him head on.

His Nimbus, James, and the quaffle ended up spiraling downwards towards the ground. James vaguely heard many voices yelling Parkin something … huh? Wasn't Parkin their beater? Perhaps he fouled and James would get to take a penalty shot. He should because the other Cannons were rubbish at penalty shots.

On his way back towards the goal, the Wanderer chasers did that to him two more times. James called a timeout and complained to the referee that they were doing it on purpose.

"Yes, Potter. That is on purpose. As a chaser, you should recognize Parkin's Pincer. If not, there's a pretty good banner over there illustrating how it's done. Let me give you a pro tip, now that I've officiated a few Cannon games now. Pass the quaffle to your other chasers. There's three of you."

"What? Why would I do that? They're rubbish. And you're going to let them keep ganging up on me three on one? That's not fair! What if I get hurt?"

"I will be vigilant for illegal moves, but the opposing chasers are allowed to fly in the same space as you, Potter. This is professional quidditch after all. Not a game in your giant backyard with all the sycophants you pay to be your friends."

"What?" James yelled at the official's back as he flew off. What did he know about James's friends? Remus was the truest friend a guy could want. Man was an idiot. Maybe he should look into getting him sacked. He was in no position to tell him what to do. Pass the quaffle. What a lame ass move. If the man actually watched a Cannons game, he'd realize that James was the only chaser capable of scoring.

The Cannons' coach signaled to him. James flew over. "Pass the quaffle, Potter. They know how you play. Mix it up a bit. And don't go calling timeouts because you feel like you need a bit of a break or a lie down, you lazy git. You missed practice all this week, and then know nothing about the other team's tactics."

"What? I was in jail."

"Not exactly a gold star on your record, eh, Potter? Get out there and pass the quaffle. This is a team. The Chudley Cannons. Not Potter's Panties twisted in a bunch."

Huffing in disgust, James resumed the field. Maybe he should buy a quidditch team. Then he wouldn't have to listen to asinine coaches and could hire good players.

Eventually, James was so battered that the quaffle was ripped from his fingers. To add insult to injury it was their female chaser with her bony claws that pried it loose. Then she passed it to her laughing boyfriend and he scored. Then their other chaser. Then her.

James could have stopped them, but the tail twigs of his Nimbus were all mangled from that bunch of flying baboons and the bludgers that kept zooming by him.

By the time the snitch was found, the Cannons were soundly defeated 510 to 40. It didn't even take that long, the game only lasted under three hours. Wigtown cheated, and paid off that referee. No team scored that many points against another professional team so quickly. Potter petulantly thought as he moved to the sides to let the Wanderers form up for their victory lap around the Cannons' field.

There was that stupid Parkin's Pincer banner. Hey! Was that supposed to be him? What kind of rubbish was that? James pulled out his wand and cast incendio at it. He laughed, the banners on either side of it caught on fire too. Take that, stupid Wigtown fans. That's what you get for disrespecting the Cannons at their own field.

What? There was a flash of red light shot at him. Prof. McGonagall was in the middle of a bunch of students yelling at them. He remembered that well enough, someone was in trouble. Heh heh. Evans? Maybe not Evans, even though she was waving her wand still and talking.

Snape was … not smirking, but openly laughing. Maybe it was Gryffindors in trouble. While MacDonald was waving her fist in James's direction. Oh yeah, he was shaking in his boots he thought sarcastically as he headed to the locker room to take a shower and get out of this crap hole.

Remus had tried to say something to James yesterday evening about his behavior at the game, but this morning's Prophet … emphatically put things in perspective. Normally, Remus would stick around to support his friend and listen to what he said, but this … well, this was going to be a monumental rant. He briefly considered either tossing the paper out or altering the front page, the second page and the sports section. Remus was not sure he could make up that much false news, and Prongs would wonder where the paper was.

There was only one thing to do. Remus rolled the paper back up, charming it to look unread, placed it on the table, then scribbled a note 'went to market', before leaving the house. He'd come back with a loaf of bread close to lunch and take a good listen to see if it was safe to go inside.

James meandered into the kitchen, while scratching his head and attempting to make sure that his hair was not lying flat. "Remus?" he called when he found himself alone.

He grunted as he read the note. Remus was such a good little house witch. His charmed self-warming plate and mug were already on the table with a glass of refreshing pumpkin juice waiting for him, along with the paper.

James sat, yawned, fixed his hair, scratched various body parts, then fixed his hair again before starting on the full breakfast that the house elves knew he preferred. One poached egg, one soft-boiled egg, two kippers, one banger, two tablespoons of cubed potatoes fried in bacon grease and two slices of buttered toast with a light smear of marmalade on one, and a sprinkling of powdered sugar and cinnamon on the second.

Feeling adventurous, James called, "Oi! I want one pancake this morning too!"

"Yes, sir, Master James," replied a house elf. "I's make that for you rights away, Master James."

"And don't forget the syrup. I want boysenberry."

"Yes, Master James. Excellent choices, Master James."

James rolled his eyes. He didn't need a house elf telling him he knew how to pick syrup. Stupid creatures would be dead if they were left to their own simple devices. The little nitwits were lucky wizards took them in and gave them something meaningful to do.

With a sigh, he unrolled the newspaper. What was those jackasses at the Ministry doing now? Besides dragging innocent wizards in and locking them up for four days without any reason whatsoever. Oafs saw dark wizards and Death Eaters everywhere, that's why they couldn't catch any real ones.

His lip lifted in confusion as he looked at the front page. Evans and MacDonald … who was that old guy with them? Reading the caption, James had no idea who Kennilworthy Whisp was supposed to be. There was ',author' after his name. Wait a minute, this was about those two forming a Wigtown Wanderer fan club at Hogwarts in memory of their friend, Helen Parkin. Why did they waste their time on that? Parkin could barely play quidditch. She talked. She never shut up about quidditch, but she certainly was not articulate or charismatic enough to sway anyone to become a Wigtown Wanderer fan. She barely got people liking the Gryffindor team. Parkin was lucky that one fourth of the school was sorted into Gryffindor or she'd have no one cheering for her. Not like James. The whole school recognized his talent.

James's lips moved as he carefully read further. So there's a fan club with Evans and MacDonald. Big deal. … kind benefactor? James's eyes squinted behind his glasses and upper lip lifted from his teeth, wrinkling his nose as he read the absolute rubbish … a solicitor donated game tickets to the fan club based on Severus Snape's enthusiasm for the students' project?

He exhaled in disgust reading the drivel about giving back and he was happy to help young people who had direction. Yeah well, obviously whoever he was trying to lure in as a client never met Severus Snape. The only thing someone should give him is a sound thrashing because his only direction was to become a Death Eater. That's who the Ministry should have locked up for the week.

A sneer crept onto his face as he read the tripe about Helen Parkin. Yeah, she was dead. Merlin's beard, they should get over it already. Wait a minute, they had Remus's name in here, along with Black's, and … his? What the hell? He was not a fellow conspirator. His solicitor would demand they print an apology. James had no idea that Parkin was in danger. It was Snape that was going to be a bonehead and fall for Black's murderous plan. Not Parkin.

Oh crap, what if Remus read this? James stood up and looked out the window in the direction of the shops. No sign of him.

One of the house elves popped into the dining room announcing, "Master James's pancake, Master James. With boysenberry syrup, Master James. Would Master James like some powdered sugar sprinkled on Master James's pancake, Master James?"

"Of course. Who'd want a pancake without sugar?"

"Yes, Master James," the creature agreed while adding the condiment. "Master James 'tis absolutely right as always, Master James."

"Shut up already."

"Yes, Master James. Crispy will go flatten her lips in the clothes press, Master James."

"Get out," James demanded as he sat down. He'd glance at the quidditch page before getting rid of the paper. He'd just tell Remus he didn't realize he hadn't read it. It wouldn't be the first time he threw out the paper before Moony got to read it.

He had to get off the Cannons. The team sucked. And their illiterate twit of a coach had the nerve to blame him. He was the only one of the team worth something.

What was this nonsense? The headline of the leading quidditch story of the day was "Pouting Potter's Pique"? Yeah, so he set a couple of Wigtown banners on fire. They forgot to mention that were displayed on the Chudley stands. What was this nonsense? He did not target the banners of the founders of the Hogwarts Wigtown Wanderers fan club. Oh … Lily Evans's banner was one of them. He didn't care if he also got MacDonald's. Hers was probably the ugly one since she only had one hand.

And why did his coach give an interview on it? Who cared what he had to say? If they wanted to interview someone, they should interview James. He was the Cannons' star player.

James knew the Cannons were desperate for press, but setting a couple banners on fire was not news. And what did James missing practice and his performance yesterday ... which definitely was not poor … another person that better get an apology printed … it was not poor and James did an excellent job because the whole Wigtown team was ganging up on him. Anyone who saw James play would know this man was a fool. What? The jackass said he was off the team? How could they kick James off the team? He had a contract. He was the only Chudley Cannon that could play. They better issue a really big apology.

Better yet, now all the other teams knew that James was available. Ooooh, better make sure there was a fire going, in case someone was trying to floo with an offer.