Chapter 5

Nicole's P.O.V

It's now early November. Sarah and I are practically attached at the hip. We hang out so much, we even hang out and had a movie marathon on Halloween.

Sarah is surprisingly a big horror fan, she was my knight during all the scary ones we watched. So all of them, they were all scary. I've never was really into horror, shocker right? Scary stuff isn't my thing much to my appearance dismay.

Sadly Sarah has been out sick for the past two days though, Denise says it's quite bad. I hope she's okay.

I don't want to worry her but I've been getting beaten up pretty bad ever since she got sick, almost every class break they find me and get another bruise on me. Lunch period and after school are the worse, since the halls are always completely empty when I walk through them. It's not a purposeful thing I'm doing, it's just my luck. The people who beat me up are friends of Derek's, they say it's pay back for rejecting him that day back in October. I suppose they were waiting for the opportunity when I didn't have Sarah to protect me, pretty clever I must admit.

Honestly I wouldn't of done anything differently. The only thing I worry about is if Sarah will find out, I hope she doesn't. She'll be absolutely furious! She will may even get in trouble for "chatting" with Derek about what he's done after she finds out.

It was final period, which was business development. I don't know why I picked this elective in the first place, it's kinda bored. Plus I'm not even sure that I want to do something with business after highschool.

It was almost over anyways, all I have to do is stay awake a little longer.

I was hoping to get out early this time to avoid them, I don't really feel like getting beaten up today. Just once would I like the world to do me a solid, just once. I sat slumped in my seat, twirling my pencil between my fingers as I waited for my teacher to write something new on the board so I could copy it down.

Mrs. Larsson, my business development teacher, was discussing something to do with marketing. She's an alright teacher, she doesn't give us a lot of homework but we do take quite a bit of notes that could count as homework sometimes. We have a text later this week, I'm not looking forward to it. This is already my lowest mark for a class! If I fail this test then my mark would go down even further. My grades are very important to me if you can't tell.

The end of the day bell rang loudly causing my to spring out of my seat, quickly packing my things into my backpack. I go to leave the classroom as a young woman's voice chimes in my ears "Nicole, could you stay behind for a second?" Mrs. Larsson smiled sweetly at me, making me feel safe. "Um sure! But it has to be really quick, I have to drop something off to my friend after school" I awkwardly spoke, turning on my heels to her desk. "Of course. As you know, your grades are barely above passing in my class" the woman started, looking at me with soft eyes. I nodded shyly, looking down at my grey converses. "I've looked over your other grades and the rest are all above 90, which is very good, you should be proud of that. The up incoming test will be worth quite a lot, so if you get most of the questions wrong you could potentially take your grade even lower" she continued. I felt horrible. I felt like I was a disappointment, not just to myself but to my mom and Sarah as well. Mrs. Larsson sighed "you obviously are struggling with the material, I just wanted to remind you if you're having trouble you can come to me at lunch or after school for extra help. I'm here for questions and guidance, my job is to make sure you know the material Nicole. You don't have to do this on your own, okay?" she placed her hands on both of my shoulders in reassurance. I nodded again as a response, looking up to her with a small smile. Mrs. Larsson removed her hands from both of my shoulders.

"You're free to leave"

I left the classroom and started down the hallway to the main entrance. So far I hadn't ran into Derek and company which was promising. I was walking as quickly as I could. The school seemed to not yet be completely empty like it usually is when I leave, perfect! Hopefully the guys got held back for detention so I wouldn't have to worry about running into them.

I make it off of school property and started heading to Sare's house, luckily for me she didn't live far so I'll be able to get home early enough. I had quite a bit of homework, projects and studying to complete.

Call me an overachiever all you want but I try to get it all done by 8:00 so I had some down time before I go to bed at 10:30. I only ever take two breaks inbetween all that and one is for supper.

I could take more break to distribute the work evenly so it wouldn't be so much at once but it take more time, if it takes longer than there's less chance I'd be going to bed at my normal time or sleeping at all. I like to keep to a schedule, it helps my mental state stay balanced. If my schedule is interfered with too much then it's hard to function and I get overly anxious, maybe even depressed.

Honestly I should be seeking professional help and medication possibly for my mental but this seems to work for me right now. Sarah was the one to help me with making the schedule, she's been a big help with dealing with my issues since I was so lost at the idea of how to deal with them. Sarah had been really interested in psychology because of a Tv show she used to watched, she had even gone to a Expo that had treated professionals who talked about their experiences with being a psychologist later that same year. She's done a lot of research, asked questions about things that made me feel less anxious and tweeked what she's learned to fit my needs. I'm really thankful to have her.

I started up the little front path that lead to the porch. I stepped onto said porch and knocked on the door loudly, well, enough so someone from inside could here.

I got surprised when Denise suddenly answered the door "oh Nicole! Come in! Come in! I was just making up a snack for Sarah and I can make you a little something too, you need to get some skin on those bones of yours!" She said sweetly gesturing at my thin frame, trying to get me to come inside.

That was one thing I loved about Mrs. Madison- well Denise, I still slip up with that, is how she treats everyone as if their family. I can't count the times she's invited me over for supper or has had Sarah give me a container so I'd have a home made meal that night, it very touching to have someone should so much love towards you. I don't remember ever feeling this much care in my own family.

I don't hold this against my mother, for not being able to cook supper every night or any night, she's a busy woman with a full time job and bills to pay. I know she loves me... It's just from a distance right now, and will probably be that way for a while.

I shyly smiling, waving my hand in a dismissive manner, declining her invitation "not today Denise, I just came by to drop off Sare's work for the day. It's not a lot this time."

I swing my backpack infront of me and pull the notes along with other work sheets, handing them to Denise. The women sighed after taking the papers from me.

"Oh the poor il mio piccolo tesoro"

Oh yeah, have I not mentioned that Denise is a Italian? Well apparently she is. She sometimes uses like Italian phrases when referring to someone, it's a sweet gesture, she's even used one for me. "Passerotta" she called me! Whatever that means.

"Yeah... I miss having her at school everyday, I hope she gets better soon. Has her fever went down at all?" I said quietly. "It's gone down quite a bit from yesterday but it still hasn't broke, she's getting stronger everyday though! She's a fighter". I smiled at that, something about Denise could always make this positive 'that's definitely true, she's a fighter alright!' I thought.

"Well I'd love to stay but I must get going, I have my own work to finish. Bye Denise! Say hi to Sarah for me" I say as I begin walking away.

"Bye Nicole! I sure will, stay safe now!"

"I will!"

20 mins later~

I finally made it home. I tossed my backpack on the ground as I slipped off my converses, I quickly go to the kitchen and grab a glass of water. I take a sip as I glance around to for any notes that my mom could've left. 'Nothing? That's odd' I thought, feeling rather shocked at the lack of notes.

'Could've just forgotten today, but it's even weirder that she didn't leave any money for takeout' I pondered for a moment.

I looked in the fridge to see if there was any leftovers that I could have, if she didn't leave money for takeout then there must be food already here right? I guess not. When I looked in the fridge I didn't see any wrapped bowls or plates of any kind, no tub with a note from mom saying 'love you', nothing. To think of it the fridge was almost empty anyways. I sighed, closing the door of the fridge and going back to my glass of water. 'I guess it's a plate of nothing for tonight's supper' I thought as I shrugged my shoulder tiredly.

I knew I could've just texted Denise and asked if I could pick up a plate of leftovers from her house so I wouldn't starve. My phone was only in my backpack, I could easily get it. So then, why was I so scared to ask? They've given me food before this shouldn't be any difference. I suppose there was actually. The past times they've me food, I never asked for it. I only took it after they kept insisting I should. So it made at least a little sense why I'd be afraid.

I finished my glass of water, placing the glass in the sink. 'Enough about food, I have work to get done.' I said to myself, going to the door to grab my backpack.

I dragged my bag over to the couch and situate myself on the floor. I pulled out the work sheets I had to complete, along with the needed notes. I sorted the papers across the coffee table infront of me according to the subject, this was so I could be organized while I worked. "The hardest work I have work be business so I should get that at of the way first then move from there, if I have any questions I'll just ask Mrs. Larsson tomorrow when I have her in the morning.." I say aloud to no one but myself.

I played the work sheet in front of me and the notes to my right, after I pulled a pencil from out of my pencil case. I held the pencil in my left hand, taking a deep breath to calm any nerves I had if I had them. I place lead to paper and began on the work sheet.

*A little over 4 hour later*

Phew! I have finally finished all my school work, did quite a bit of studying and even may a big dent in a project. I was now sprawled out on the sofa in my living room and was indulging myself in a guilty pleasure of mine, romantic comedies. There's something about a cheesy movie about two people falling in love that just hits the right spot to bring instant euphoria! It's wonderful.

I heard my phone vibrant on the table in front of me, that's odd?

I picked it up and noticed I had a text from Sarah. 'This should be interesting' I thought. I punched in my password and read what she had sent.

Sarah Madison: ugh 🙄 being stuck inside all day SUCKS!! i missed hanging out with you!! 😭

I snickered at her text. Sarah can act a little clingy and immature at times, but it's funny.. and a little cute I must admit. I blushed a little at the thought of saying she was cute, don't get me wrong! She totally is! But it's just weird to admit it since she's my friend. I've always knew I was gay, and I've had plenty of crushes on girls before, but I've never been this close to anyone like how I am with Sare. I don't know if what I feel for Sarah are crush feelings or just platonic, I'm scare to think I might have a crush on her for the opportunity it might fuck up our friendship. This worrying had made a pit form in my stomach, I didn't know what to do about what I felt.

I took a couple of deep breaths, the pit in my stomach slowly melting away. I was once again calm. I decided to just not focus on the idea of having a crush on my friend and just let what happens, happens.

I had completely forgotten to respond to Sarah's text. Once I had remembered, before I could begin typing, my phone went off again. Twice this time

Sarah Madison: but thanks for bringing my homework over afterschool everyday. youre a angel 👼

Sarah Madison: also what did you put my contact as btw ❓🐱

I giggled again as I read over her texts, 'these emojis, my god' I thought. This time I sent a reply back.

Me: "Sarah Madison". And no problem, it's the least I can do while you're stuck in bed sick

I turned my phone off and sat it back down on the coffee table, going back to my movie. My phone went off again. I picked it up and checked it, still Sarah. I readjusted how I was laying on the sofa.

Sarah Madison: really? you didn't even do anything special with it? 😢

Me: What did you want me to do?

Sarah Madison: idk use a nickname or something

Sarah Madison: anything more creative than my legal name

Me: But isn't the point of a contact name to know who it is?

Sarah Madison: yeah but that doesn't mean it has to be boring

Sarah Madison: you can still be fun with it

Sarah Madison: you didn't even use any emojis

Me: You're ridiculous.

Me: But fine, I'll change it

[Sends screenshot]

Me: Happy now?

Sare-bear❤️: yes very 😸

*Time skip*

Sarah and I had talked for close to two hours. It's obvious we both missed seeing each other during school.

Luckily though she says she's feeling a lot better, and hopefully she'll be able to go to school in the next two days. I'm very relieved, I was worried for her when she suddenly became sick overnight.

I said goodnight to Sarah and began getting ready for bed.

I tidied up the living from when I had been working, washed the dishes that were in the sink and started going up the stairs. I brushed my teeth and got changed into an old t-shirt paired with flannel pajama bottoms. I quietly went into my room, plugged my phone into it's charger and slowly got into bed. I wrapped myself tightly, bringing the blanket up to my chin, curling up my legs. My chest softly rising and falling, my breathing evening out as I began to slip into unconsciousness.