5

After she shut the door in my face, I was spread out the couch prepared to spend the evening alone. Did I want to no, did I need to? Yes. She was leaving tomorrow and all I wanted to do was spend the remainder of the time with her. How could I do that without making it weird for her? I was making it weird already. The dream I had last night was making it even harder to look at her, without picturing her beneath me. It seemed so real, but she denied anything happening. Perhaps it was best not to think so hard about it.

At a quarter after five she came sauntering down the stair's laptop in hand. She wore her signature look, her hair was in a bun, an oversized hoodie, and short shorts although I couldn't see them, I knew they were there. All the blood began to rush south as she came to a stop in front of me. Was she as soft as I dreamed her to be?

"Are you busy?"

I pressed pause on the television show to give her my undivided attention, "not at all did you need something?"

"Do you want to help me pick out stuff for my room?"

"I can do that." Before I could sit up on the couch and give her room to sit, she sat down trapping me between her and the couch. "Here let me sit up and give you some more space."

"Mmkay."

She had no idea the affect that she had on me; her eyes were focused on the laptop screen as she leans forward allowing me the space to sit up.

"Do you have any ideas about what you want?"

"Ha, not really, I do however have some colors in mind."

"Well that's a good start. What is your color scheme?"

"Pink, grey, and blue. More of a blush pink, cobalt blue, oh but I don't think we can paint the walls so maybe never mind."

"How about we start with what you actually need. Are you going to take your bed from your father's house, or any of the other items from your room?"

She sank deeper into the couch emitting a groan of frustration in the process. Slipping her hand into her hoodie she pulls out her phone, showing the missed calls and unanswered texts. There's and accumulative 50 missed calls, texts, and voicemails.

"I know you don't want to hear this, but maybe you should return his call. The very least his texts just to let him know you're still breathing."

"You were right, I didn't want to hear that." Just as stubborn as her father. "I mean eventually I'll call him, but I'm still upset Ezra. I get to be upset."

I pull her into a hug, "you're tight you get to be upset, but part of being an adult is taking the high road even if you don't want to. You're his only child just let him know you are okay."

"Fine, but for the record I'm only doing this for you."

"That's fine, I'll accept it."

She opened her messages, and I instantly regretted having her respond to him. "Camilla hand me your phone."

"No, it's ok. I want to see how my dad really feels." Chuckling humorlessly, she scrolls through her texts, each one more horrible than the last. I could feel her body trembling against mine.

Standing abruptly her laptop clatters to the floor, tears streamed down her cheeks. "I don't want, I don't. I'm just going to go back to my room."

Before she can run away, I pull her into my lap wrapping my arms securely around her shaking form.

"What did I do wrong?" she asks sniffling into my chest. "Why does no one want me?"

"You did nothing wrong."

I was teeming with anger; I can't be held responsible for what I do when I see him again. Out of his own anger and resentment he had needlessly hurt her.

"What's wrong with me?" She sobs, "do I not deserve to be loved? I did everything. I did everything I was told, what else can I do?"

"Oh, sweet girl, look at me." Slowly she pulls away from my chest, her red and watery eyes stare into my own. Cupping her face between my hands I place a kiss to her forehead. "Listen to me sweetheart, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you Camilla. You deserve all the love and happiness in the world. I'm sorry your dad is not acting like the father you deserve. You can forget about him. There's two things that you can count on now."

"What's that?" she inquires staring inquisitively up at me.

"Your hands and me. You understand?" Teary eyed she throws her arms around my neck and nods her head.

I held her until the trembling and crying stopped and lay us both on the couch when she fell asleep in my arms. In the time that I've known her, I had never seen her cry. I never wanted to see her sad again, I would do anything to keep her happy. I drew her in closer holding her tightly just to alleviate the ache in my chest. Placing a kiss on her forehead I grab the remote off the coffee table and press play resuming the television show. When she wakes, I'll put on her favorite movie and order pizza for us.

Camilla

I blink open my eyes to meet Ezra's chest, dark curls decorate the broad expanse. Would it be weird if ran my fingers through it? Probably, especially since I was crying in his lap earlier. Now here I am being held securely in his arms. Safe and sound. Under different circumstances this would be ideal, but he saw me crying. No, he saw me having a breakdown, a snot nosed blubbering mess. I mean my father telling me that he should have let my mother abort me and a slew of other things would do that to a girl. I press my head into Ezra's chest inhaling his scent trying to will away the negative thoughts that were surfacing. I didn't have anyone anymore. He said I could count on him, but how long would that last?

"Are you awake?" I hear him ask. I want to say no and just stay like this, but all good things must come to an end sometimes.

"Mhmm." I mumble into his chest not bothering to pull away.

"Are you hungry?" He was trying to have a conversation; I untangle myself from him and sit up.

"I could eat."

"Ok." He follows suit and sits up on the couch as well. I thought he would move away but he grabs his phone and wraps an arm around my shoulder. I feel my temperature rising; I lean into him attempting to hide my flushed face. "What kind of toppings do you like?"

"Pepperoni."

"That it?"

"Mm extra pepperoni? Oh, I like kalamata olives and mushrooms."

"I'll order the pizza and you can find us something to watch."

I of course already know what we are going to watch, grabbing the controller I exit out of Netflix to download Disney+. Logging into my account I do a quick search for Atlantis.

"I've never seen this one either."

"Well you are in for a treat this movie is excellent as well. I'm going to run to the bathroom."

Not waiting for a response, I make my way to bathroom upstairs. I get a look at myself in the mirror and I'm disgusted. There's dried snot and tears on my face. Bitch this is muthafucking disgusting. How was Ezra looking at me, when I look like this? A hot mess. I wash my face and head back down the steps and sit on the opposite end of the couch.

"You're so far away." He moves closer to me without waiting for me to respond.

"I was down here earlier looking like a snot nosed brat and you said nothing. In fact, you smiled all up in my face. I don't know how to take that." I pout and look away from him.

He wraps his arms around my figure diminishing some of my anger. "You're precious to me no matter how you look."

Heat rises throughout my body. He really shouldn't say things like that to me, and especially not when he was this close. I was on fire.

"That's fine and all but- you know what never mind it's not a big deal. Let's just watch the movie." I press play and relax into his embrace, since it seemed like he wasn't going to give me my personal space anytime soon.

I don't pay any attention to the movie. How could I, my entire focus was on the man that was holding me. He was shirtless holding me. I could feel his body vibrate when he laughed at something on screen. Oh, how I regret wearing a hoodie right now. To be honest it was a blessing and a curse. A blessing because at this very moment I was sweating bullets and the hoodie was concealing it, a curse because I couldn't feel his skin against mine the way I wanted to. My thoughts flow back to that night, if he moved his hands lower, I could feel that pleasure once more. I squeeze my thighs together. Nope, I shouldn't even be thinking these things, after crying in his lap it didn't matter what he said to me when he was drunk.

"Are you thirsty?" I needed something to cool my body down; at the same time a knock from the door sounded.

"That's the pizza, you grab the drinks and I'll get the door."