1: A Bad Day

Surah at-Talaq, verse 07, Allah says:

After every difficulty, Allah will soon grant relief.

Indeed, Allah always helps and provides us with a way out from every difficulty that we face. Our burdens, troubles and difficulties can be removed through prayers, patience and by having complete faith in Allah.

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I was leaving from work when Katie stopped me. Katie worked with me and was a good friend. She was decorating the latest thriple layer pineapple cake with some blue and yellow icing while I was packing my stuff. We worked in a cake shop. 'Bakeacake'. It was also a usual coffee shop.

"Jannat, have a look." Katie said as she continued with her icing.

"Awesome, here, take these chocolate chips. It will look good." I passed her the bowl.

"Thanks! By the way, why are you leaving early? I'll be bored and that idiot will eat my brains." Katie said referring to a regular flirty customer.

"Oh, so bad. I can't stay to watch the show." I replied with a wink. "Mom called me home early today."

"Hmm…fine. I'll manage."

"Oh, and yes, inform boss about my leave if you see him. I just don't want to see his…face."

"Come on, why do you fight with him? He is such a sweet person." Katie said dozing off into a dream about our 'boss'.

"Sweet?! He is such a jerk! I don't fight with him. He triggers me."

"I still don't agree him on being a jerk. He still is cute for me." Katie stopped her praises seeing my annoyed reactions.

"Anyways, what did he tell you this time?"

"He told me to work without my hijab. Who the hell is he to tell me what I should wear or not?" I said as I replaced my mask with the niqaab.

"Didn't you ask the reason?" Katie said sipping a bottle of water.

"It leaves a bad impression on the customers." I said imitating my boss.

"Did I ever tell him to work without his shirt?"

Katie spat the water on the floor which she was drinking. We both laughed.

"Anyways, getting late. Bye." I said as I looked in my watch.

                                ***

I took my scooter and made my way towards the exit. I was wondering why my mom called me home early today. There had to be a problem...again. I was tired of the daily drama but they were never, even after torturing me to this level. If suicide was halal, I would have committed it years ago. I felt my head would burst from such thoughts until I hit a bike. I fell off the scooter. Fortunately, there wasn't even a scratch, on me…not the scooter. On the other hand, the person on the bike was injured badly, severely or I should say horribly. His head banged on the front of my scooter and he fell directly on his face. I panicked and froze. I didn't understand what to do. It was a remote area. There was no one to help. I went to him and turned him onto my lap. His face…I could only say Masha Allah. I checked his pulse from his hand but I didn't understand it. I bent down to his chest and checked if his heart rate was fine. Alhamdulillah, he was alive. The man was hurt terribly due to my dreadful thoughts. I felt awful. I called the ambulance. It arrived within 5 minutes but it felt like hours. His head was bleeding badly. My abaya was stained with blood. We reached the hospital and I filled the form. He was taken in at once. I texted mom that it would be late.

Mom- Jannat there are some serious issues. Come home this instant.

I simply ignored the message because it was hard to explain her everything at that time. But later, when I would, she would understand. I wanted to go home, but obviously, I can't leave this handsome wounded and unconscious. I needed to inform his parent and wait till he regains consciousness. It was my fault that I was dreaming while driving. The doctor informed that he got stitches on his forehead. I made the payments. The doctor informed me that I could meet him. I went to him at once and found him lying on the bed. He had so many scars on his face. To be precise, his handsome face. I felt so sorry for him.

"Umm…hello." I stammered. "I am really, truly sorry. I know that any amount of apology of mine wouldn't heal you nor would it decrease the pain that I've caused to you. Is there anything I could do for you?" Guilt was hitting in my head as I kept my gaze down.

"Are you hurt?" He asked instead.

I was shocked. A weird sense of feeling arose in me. Has he lost his brains? Did he lose his memory? Did he lose his sense? No! Then why is he speaking like this. It freaked me out.

"One mistake and you have destroyed someone's entire life." My inner self taunted me.  

Was this person even listening to what I was saying? I shook my head no. He looked so charming and I destroyed the charm by adding the scars on his face.

"Can I at least get your parent's number? I need to call them here. They must be worried." I said as I took my phone.

I didn't want to extend the chat as it was haraam to talk to a Non-Mehram.

"What's the time?" He asked.

My eyes widened. Has this person lost his sense after hitting? Or did he lose his memory? Yes! No! I don't know! I was panicked. I rushed to the door to call the doctor when he stopped me.

"Excuse me." He said politely as I turned to him. "I may be sounding weird but I need to know the time."

"It's 7 in the evening." I replied my eyes still wide.

"Calm down. Where's my phone?" He asked while I pointed to the drawer beside him.

He gave me his parent's number and I informed them about everything.

"Actually, I need to go. My mom doesn't know that I am here. She must be worried." I said.

"Yeah. Can I give you an advice?" He said me as my eyes grew wide again.

This person seemed so weird. He was talking to me as if I knew him from years. But still, I nodded. He would surely say me not to drive as guys always taunted girls who can't drive properly.

"I absolutely appreciate that you cover your face but it would be better if you don't widen your eyes." He said showing his dimples as I closed my eyes.

"Okay." I said as I didn't understand what else to say.

His dimples were so deep and awesome. He had dimples in both his cheek while I had only in my left cheek. I felt jealous to some extent.

I met his parents after my Maghrib Salah. His father went to the reception to clear the payments which I previously did and I needed to leave before they get to know about it in case they wouldn't accept it. The unknown-mysterious-handsome-and I don't know what all my mind called this person, yeah! So his mother was a sweet and gentle lady in abaya. She came over to me and greeted me to which I greeted back.

"Beta, I hope you aren't hurt anywhere, are you?" She asked politely.

"No." I shook my head. "Aunty, I am so sorry that because of me-"

"It's okay beta. Don't blame yourself. It surely would be Ahmad's fault. We always warn him to drive carefully. I don't know which world this boy lives in."

"No aunty. It's actually-"

"Look, it's all Allah's plan or else how would I meet you."

"Matlab!?!" I spoke out whatever my mind said. "I mean, what do you mean? No I mean, I don't know, you may continue. Oh Allah!" I sounded so rude and I was just blabbering.

She lets out a giggle to which I don't understand what to reply.

"Calm down child." She suggested.

"Where is Ahmad?"

"Uh!" I stammered then I realized that she is taking about her son. "That room, aunty." I said pointing towards a room.

She advised me to drive carefully on my way to home. I took her leave and made my way towards my home making sure I don't commit any unintentional murders now as it was already dark when it was hard to drive for me.

I was wondering what mom would say me now. She would surely kill me. I received her call but I didn't attend it as I was trying to drive carefully. They are surely going to destroy my life.

                            ***

"Jannat, you have to come up with a final decision about where you want to stay. Your dad wants you with him, Hamza and Asif. Can't I even have at least one child of mine with me?" My mom said as a tear escaped her eye.

"Mom, why do you talk to dad? I said you not to. I'm all grown up and it's my choice where I want to stay. Don't worry mom. I will never leave you." I said as I wiped her tear.

"Talk to your dad. He has been waiting for your call since morning." Mom said and left my room.

I didn't want to talk to him because I knew he would ask me to come over again. I didn't want to go to his house. I didn't consider it my home. I forced myself to talk to him. I wore my hijab and went to the terrace as all my cousins were over at the house. After gathering all my courage, I called him. I took a long breath and greeted him. He replied politely.

"Beta, I really want you to come here and-"

"I know dad. You have said this thing for the millionth time or maybe more. I already said you I can't leave mom alone." I interrupted him and tried to be polite.

"Beta, Asif is younger than you, but he stays without your mom, doesn't he?" Dad said trying to convince me.

"Dad he's already 17 now. He is not young anymore. Besides, he is a boy. He can stay without mom while I can't."

"Fine, do what you want. I can't force you. I've tried so many times now. Anyways, how are you my princess?" Dad asked.

"I am…" I wondered what to reply.

Tears rolled down my cheeks. I wished I could say that I am doing great but I wasn't. The mental stress was eating me up. But neither my mom nor my dad understood the pressure and tension on my mind. I remained silent.

"Beta, are you crying? Don't. Everything will be fine." My dad tried to console me which was of no use.

"Seriously?!" I said referring to my dad's statement. "You are saying this from previous 9 years dad. When will that day come?" I asked furiously.

I knew that we shouldn't be mad at parents nor we are allowed to scream at them but I had no choice.

"Jannat, it's all because of your mom. If she-"

"Don't talk about my mom, please." I said seriously.

"Okay, fine. How was your work today?" He asked as he knew I loved my job.

"It was cool." I replied sadly and then suddenly energetic. "Katie and I baked a pineapple cake today. It was beautiful with blue and yellow icing." I replied as I felt my mood better.

"Good, ma sha Allah. You wear niqaab at work, don't you?" Dad asked.

"Yes dad, obviously I do. But when we are baking, I wear the masks." I said a

I heard my mom calling from downstairs for dinner.

"Yeah mama, I am coming in two minutes." I shouted.

"Mama was calling for dinner."

"Okay, go then."

"I've asked for two minutes." I said with a smile.

My dad and I usually had a lot to talk no matter what the subject is. It was so mood refreshing. We talked about my job and the beautiful things I made every day. I realized that it had been half an hour since I was talking while I asked for two minutes from mom. I rushed downstairs and saw everyone having dinner. I escaped from the sight of everyone and skipped dinner. I hated spending time with my so-called family and so-called loving cousins.

I went to my room and thought about the day. It was so bad. First, I had an argument with my boss then I hit a person, to be precise, a very beautiful handsome person. After coming home, I had to deal with my parent's fight. But I didn't feel bad. It was a routine now. I was used to everything.

Every good and bad happens for a reason. But I didn't get my reason. It was already 7 years since my parents divorced and I was away from my siblings. I met them occasionally. I missed them a lot. And I missed her a lot. Everyone missed her, because of my mistake. My older brother Hamza and younger brother Asif stayed with my dad. My older brother was only 10 months older than me while my younger brother was 5 years younger. She was 2 years younger than me. Asif had to suffer a lot after the divorce. He was very young then. I missed both of them terribly. But I couldn't leave my mom. She was the reason I was living. I wanted to keep my mother happy. She received 'everything' in her life. Except love, happiness and freedom. The things we consider 'everything' in our life today. Weird, isn't it?

I knew, if I stay with my dad, my life would not be the same. I knew the difference between right and wrong. I didn't want the freedom to do everything. But I didn't even want to be restricted from doing anything. I wanted to live my life. I didn't want my life to be controlled by anyone.

I am the owner of my life.

                                 ***

A/N: As salamu alaikum everyone. The first chapter is out. Hope you guys like it. Have a sweet time reading. Next update will be soon. Insha Allah.