Fourteen

Asher

I did nothing on the weekends. Like literally I spent my whole weekend on my bed sleeping a lot. I've been monitoring my sleep since last week and approximately I slept for more than 24 hours this week, though the time I slept in school is not counted.

But anyway, it's Monday again and I hate Mondays. Even if it's just hours in school, it feels forever. I don't know but that's what I'm feeling every Monday. I hate the fact that 1 hour feels 1 day, and the whole day feels like an eternity.

Weird but that's what I feel.

We did so much studying this day. It's August and exams are coming next week. So, the whole week is for studying. Yes, also the Friday, that is where that day will be different. When exams are coming, Fridays will be also spent as a normal day. A full study day.

Right now, I am in the office because Mr. Eric wanted to see me.

"Here are the list of the team. All of their informations are there including birth months, birth years, blood types, grade level, and more." Mr. Eric said then gave me a folder, full of papers.

I opened the folder and yes, all of the team's informations are there. "So, I'm suppose to study this or what?" I asked while flipping through the pages of the folder.

"Not study but you must know them so you can be friends with them or to be close to them."

"I am not good at making friends." I shook my head.

Mr. Eric sighed, he leaned back on his chair. "Do you know why I chose you to be the team's manager?" he asked. I shook my head.

"Not really, no." I answered. He then leaned forward and placed his arms on the desk.

"Well, it's because I wanted you to change. For yourself. I want you to step out of your comfort zone and start experiencing things." he explained.

I didn't talk, I just continued listening on what he was saying. "The first time I saw you, I immediately thought that you're struggling with something. And my thought was right. You're stuck in your own comfort zone, Asher. You're stuck and you don't know what to do because you are alone in that zone and you convinced yourself that there's no way out. But, that's wrong, because there is always a way out. You just need to stop overthinking for once in a while and look for clues to help you find your way out."

What he said totally hit me. It's true, I'm stuck in my comfort zone for a long time. I don't know when it started, but I am struggling. I'll mark his words and do what he wants me to do. Not only for the team, but also for myself.

I will also help myself.

The next day, Tuesday, we focused on writing essays and writing essays and writing essays and just really writing essays. We did a lot of writings today. I think I did wrote 200 paragraphs today.

My hands hurt like hell. I can't feel my fingers. My eyes and my mind are really tired. But, I have to study hard, I need to study hard for me to be able to climb to the honor's list.

Last grading period, my Mom was disappointed. I was last in the honor's list, she was very disappointed because I used to be at the top five, but now...now I am at the last.

And what hurts the most, is me being disappointed by myself either.

Very disappointed. I didn't even know why I ended up at the last. I mean, I did my best to climb at the top five but, it seems not quite enough.

That's why I need to study hard this time. To make my Mom, my friends, and myself proud. So, that I can keep up with their expectations and they can be proud having me. I don't want to disappoint anyone, so, I'll be doing my best to keep up.

I went to the library because I can't focus with my friends around. I'll be probably distracted easily, but that won't happen because I'm here peacefully in the library. Reading a book with my earphones plugged in.

I was really focused on the book that I am reading, to the point that I didn't hear Justin calling my name. I was really deaf not until he snatched my headphones off my ears. I flinched and blinked a lot as I look at him. And he's just there laughing at my scared face.

"Devils, Justin! You buggin' scared me." my voice were at half-whisper and half-shout. He just continued laughing but I can't here any noise coming from his mouth. He must be keeping it inside his chest and not letting it out because we're in a library.

I just stared at him until his very last laugh.

I raised my eyebrows while looking at him. "You done?" I asked him with irritation.

He looked at me too. "Dude, I called you ten times and you didn't even bother looking at me. you should've seen your face." he answered then handed me my earphones.

I was dumbfounded when he said that I didn't even realize that he was calling me 10 times already because I was just too busy. "You do know I'm wearing earphones, right?" I asked him again.

"Yeah, so?"

"You are really so dumb." I shook my head and he chuckled. I turned my attention to the book. He just stared at me and I felt uncomfortable.

"What?" I urged to ask while still looking at the book.

"Nothing." he answered. Again, I got annoyed and glared at him. He innocently smiled at me then looked away.

I slammed my book close then leaned forward. "I know something's up, Justin." I said full of seriousness. "It's either you tell me right now or I'm gonna kick that bloody ass of yours out of here."

He was silent for a moment, then he looked at me with his face wearing seriousness. "What's happening to you, Ash?" he asked and I can see the look at his face. He is worrying.

"What do you mean?" my eyes widened.

"What's happening to you? You're not like this." he continued. I just stared at him in confusion. I can't talk. I'm frozen at my own seat.

"Hey!"

I woke up with that voice. My arms are crossed at the table and my face were buried at my arms, I got up from my sleeping position and scratched my eyes.

When my vision got completely adjusted, I looked at the person in front of me holding two cups of coffee.

It was Candice.

She took a seat at the other end of the table, facing me. "You alright?" she asked while fixing her position. I smiled and nodded at her. "I just overslept.." I said, still nodding. "..I think."

She gave me the coffee she was holding earlier. Then I realized why there are two. One for me, one for her. "Here, so you won't fall asleep again." she said then I grabbed the coffee.

"Thanks." I smiled.

I took a sip from the coffee. After taking that sip, I stared at the coffee like a weirdo. I looked at Candice, astonished. "How did you know about my favorite blend?"

"Life's full of surprises, Asher." she said, also smiling. I stared at her then smiled and took a sip from the coffee again.

We stayed silent for minutes. I'm just reading my book and taking down notes while she's in one of the shelves, searching for a book. Next thing I know, is that I'm staring at her. She's really good looking.

The perfect warm vibe of her presence made me smile. Her dark long hair sways with her as she moves and her angelic face always stands out.

"You don't need to work yourself too much." Candice said while walking towards me. I realized that I was staring at her for a long time.

"Actually.." I smiled. "..I really do need to. I have to catch up on my grades."

She took a seat again but with books on her hands now. "Are you kidding?" she chuckled. "Asher, you're one of the most smart guys in our class. You don't have to study that much. It's not like you have someone to compete to. I mean, the jocks in our class doesn't really care about their grades though."

Her words are literally awesome. That did made me smile. "Thanks for the compliment, Candice, but no. I really need to study. For my mom." I said then smiled.

"Oh, so you're motivated." she smilingly said.

I just nodded at her then turned my attention back to my book. I'm not motivated. I'm doing this just to meet my parent's expectation. So, she won't be disappointed at me.

I spent the rest of the days in the week just fully studying. I really need to get on that place again. I want to impress my family. I want them to be proud at me.

So, I'll be doing my very best.