Twenty-Four

Remembering those dreams that I just had, my mind got confused. It's like strings that are tangled and can never be fixed. It keeps running, rolling, tangling until it becomes inevitable. Staring at the air while walking, Archer tapped my shoulder.

"We're here." he reminded. I didn't notice that we already arrived at the school. My mind was focused on thinking about my dreams.

I nodded and took a deep breath. Archer noticed my quietness. "You alright?" he asked, looking at me. I nodded repeatedly and looked back at him. "Of course." I answered, forcing myself to smile.

"You sure? You were silent the entire time. Is there something bothering you?"

I chuckled softly, "I am always silent, Archer. No need to worry. I'm seriously fine." I explained. He didn't respond but just nodded then walked towards the gate.

"Oh, and also..." I called. He stopped to look at me and waited. "Worrying. It's a good trait for a person and that's one thing that friends do." I explained and smiled.

His eyes widened. "Wait really? Did I just worry? Did I just do that?" he asked out of amusement.

I chuckled and walked towards the gate. I patted his shoulder, "Yes you did, my friend." I said and proceeded on walking. We entered the gate and went to our perspective classrooms.

I slowly sat down to my seat. Inhaling and exhaling deeply, still thinking about my dreams. Music is my meditation, so I grabbed my earphones and plugged it into my ears. I played the music which helps me calm my mind whenever this kind of thing happens.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I leaned my head back and breathed normally. I stayed in that position for minutes until the bell rang and Mr. Eric arrived.

Having lunch with my friends and still thinking about my dreams, at the corner of my eye, I saw Archer looking around with a tray on his hand. I waved at him, "Archer!" I called.

He immediately noticed me and ran straight to our seat. Irish looked at me and leaned to whisper to my ear. "Who is that?" she whispered while looking at Archer.

"He's from my team." I immediately responded. Archer got to our spot and was completely shy. He bowed his head and sat next to me. Quite odd seeing Archer being a shy puppy.

"Thank you." he suddenly whispered to me. I nodded at him as an answer and continued eating. I remembered the deal that Archer and I had so I realized, why not introduce him to my friends?

I coughed two times to call everyone's attention. They all looked at me. "Uh, Archer," I looked at him. "This are my friends. Agatha, Maddie, Cristina, Mika, Irish, and Justin." I introduced them.

He just nodded at each of them. "Guys, this is Archer. A friend from the team." I introduced him. They all smiled at Archer and he smiled back. I also joined and smiled, looking at each of them. Too much smiling, huh?

The whole lunch was spent talking, messing around, and getting to know Archer. And I gotta say, Archer, is growing. You know these past few months he is like this cursing-machine-guy that doesn't really care about everyone and now he's completely different.

Except for cursing, he still curses a lot.

At the training, my mind was still thinking about those dreams. I am staring at the air, completely unconscious of my surroundings.

I need to take a nap. My mind is very tired and it requires rest, but I am worried that the dreams might appear again.

My eyes started closing, I couldn't take it anymore. I laid down at the bench where I always sit. I used my bag as a pillow, covered my eyes with my arms, and started to sleep.

This little boy showed up again. I saw him sitting at the rooftop. Remember my favorite spot? He is sitting there and is staring at the town's view. I walked towards him and sat a few distances from him. I looked at him closely, but I still can't recognize his face. It's still blurry.

I gave up on staring at him and glanced at the beautiful view of the town. Then he spoke. "Let me guess." he said. "You have a problem, aren't you?"

I looked at him with my eyes widened. He then looked at me too. "You are bothered by something." he continued. My mouth parted open, but I can't spit out any words.

"Don't push yourself to speak. You'll just get tired. Someday you'll know what your dreams are about."

I woke up gasping and immediately got up to sit. Again, breathing heavily and staring at the air. I heard footsteps nearby so I glanced at the person who is walking and saw Agatha and Justin carrying snacks.

I sighed and fixed my breathing before turning to them. I then stood up and faced them. They are smiling until they got to me.

"We saw you sleeping and planned to scare you but suddenly you just woke up." Justin joked. I chuckled softly, "I, uh, was just tired." I answered, rubbing my eyes.

"Oh, we are all tired." Agatha corrected. We sat down and Justin pulled out the snacks from the paper bag.

"You know," Agatha started. "That Archer guy seems to be nice."

"Trust me, he wasn't like that the first time I met him." Justin complained, eating chips.

"I completely agree." I responded and smiled.

"Wait really? He seems so nice when you introduced him to us." Agatha said.

"That's because he is changing. He told me that he wanted to make friends so I'm helping him out." I explained.

"By taking him to us?" Justin complained.

"Is there something wrong with that?" I curiously asked. Agatha and I both looked at Justin.

"Nothing. It's just that...do you really believe this guy? Back then, he was just teasing you and now he transformed into a somehow innocent guy." Justin explained. I rolled my eyes at him.

"People change, Justin. They do it because they wanted to. Not just for their friends or family or to anyone, but for themselves." I explained.

"But, people change because of pain, right? If they had their hearts broken or something." Agatha cut in.

"Some." I answered. "But, other people change because they want to adjust their personality trait. They want to change themselves to be able to blend in the society which affects them before. Or they want to change because they needed to."

We went silent for a moment. "Well, then we have to figure out what's with this bastard." Justin suddenly spoke.

"That's why we gotta get to know him." I said and smiled. We finished our snacks then Agatha went back to her training. Justin followed her to watch and spend the rest of the time there.

Just after they both got out, the team entered the court. Archer ran to the bench, "Hey, I got you water." he said and threw the water bottle to me. I caught the water bottle, opened it, and drank it.

"Where were you guys?" I said after drinking. Archer bent down to tie his lace. "Outside." he answered and stood up, putting his arms on his waist. "Mr. Eric said that we'll spend the break outside because he doesn't want to bother you while you sleep."

"Really?" I asked with disbelief.

Archer raised his eyebrows and nodded. "Alright, I gotta change my clothes." he said and was about to run to the locker room.

"Wait," I stopped him. "Change? Wha-we're done?" I curiously asked.

"Yeah." Archer nodded. "Mr. Eric said that we will not have any training tomorrow." he explained.

"Why is that?"

"Well, he wants to have some time to rest and prepare for the match next week."

"The match? The match is next week?"

"Yes. Aren't you supposed to know that before us?"

I shook my head, "No. Mr. Eric didn't tell me anything."

"You sure?" he squinted his eyes. "Maybe he did tell you and you just forgot."

"Maybe.." I whispered, staring at the floor.

He didn't respond and ran to the locker room. The whole team have changed their clothes and got their stuff then left the court. I told them to continue walking because I needed to say goodbye to my friends first.

I went to the other court where the volleyball team is located. I waved my hand to Agatha because she's facing me and signalled that I am going home. She excused herself and went to me.

"You're already done?" she asked.

I nodded, "Yeah, Mr. Eric dismissed the training early today."

She also nodded as a response. "Alright, I gotta go." I turned around to go out. "See you tom-" I was cut out when she called me.

"Ash." she called. I turned around and faced her. "You think that others will not notice but, we've been friends for almost 4 years. I know if something's going on and right now, I believe there is. You know you can always tell us, right?" she explained, worrying.

I sighed and walked close to her. I pressed my lips together, "Do you remember back when we were freshmen? I have you and Justin to stay overnight at my house because I was having these weird bad dreams?" I asked.

She looked at me directly in the eye. "Yes." she nodded.

I gulped and bowed my head. "They're back." I sighed, still bowing my head. I can't see her reaction but I know she is shocked.

"When did it come back?" she asked. I lifted my head to look at her. "I don't know. I'm not sure." I whispered.

She held my shoulders, "Hey, look at me." she said. I looked at her and sighed. "You can get through this. You once did and I know you can do it again." she cheered me up and smiled.

"Right." I said. I bid my goodbye to her and to the others and went outside to go home.

While walking, I saw Archer standing at the gate. I went to him and tapped his shoulder. "Why are you still here?" I asked.

"You asshole, do you think I have the keys to your house?" he complained. I smiled forcefully and nodded. I realized that this bastard is staying in our house now. We then went home.

I spent the rest of the day in my room researching about the dreams that I am having. I searched for different kinds of dreams. I even searched for my situation but I didn't find anything.

It's currently 9:00 in the evening and I'm still here at my table.

"You might wanna get your eyes off that screen for a second." Archer said. I looked behind me and saw him leaning at the door frame with his arms crossed in front of his chest.

I immediately click the exit button and changed the tab to plain search bar. "Oh, uh, I was just doing research for our assignment." I lied.

He closed the door and sat on the couch. He leaned back and stared at the ceiling. I noticed his behavior so I looked at him. "You okay?" I asked, the side of my head resting on my hand.

He smirked and chuckled softly. "I was just thinking that...why do some people want to die?" he wondered, still staring at the ceiling.

It is the first time that Archer talks about this kind of stuff. I closed my laptop and faced him. "Why do you think?" I asked back.

He looked at me and fixed his way of sitting. He put his elbows on his knee and slowly rubbed his hands. "I don't even know. I just saw these few posts of some people saying that they wanted to disappear in this world."

"They're suicidal." I stated. He looked at me out of curiosity. "What is that?" he asked.

"That's what society calls them. If someone wished or wanted themselves to be dead, they are stated as a suicidal person. They are deeply unhappy and they want to commit suicide. End their lives." I explained.

"Why would they even want that? Are they crazy or something?"

"They are like that because they are in pain. Or they experienced pain. Or trauma. Something is going on with their life to the point that they cannot take it anymore and they just wanted to completely disappear in the entire world."

A long pause happened.

"What about you?" he asked, with his face wearing seriousness. "Have you ever thought about that? Committing suicide?"

I stared at him for a few seconds before answering. "No." I answered. "It's pointless. I mean, there's no point in that. And I don't want to die that early. I'll be completely forgotten if I am perished in this world."

"You know that's not true. You're not gonna be forgotten, especially for those people who love you. The memories you made with them and the unforgettable moments that you spent with them will always remain." he explained.

"Your face, your voice, your emotions, your pieces of advice. All of that will remain." he paused. "When you die, that is when words become ashes. The thing you've left, the words that you've left, they'll slowly fade away, be swept, and disappear into thin air. But, they won't be forgotten."

Hearing those words, I realized why Archer wanted to change. He's in pain. The moment he asked me about helping him make friends, I quite figured out that he wants to change for himself.

"So, you want me to die?" I joked.

He chuckled softly and shook his head. "Yeah, so this room can be mine." he responded. My face turned serious and I glared at him.

He laughed at me, "I'm just kidding. Of course, I don't want you to die. I know you still have dreams to achieve. And you still need to help me." he stated.

I shook my head and stood up. He laid down and made his hands as his pillow. "And also you still haven't asked out that Candice girl yet." he added.

I immediately turned around. "I told you she's not my type!" I said.

"Really? Then why are you so uptight?"

"I am not uptight. You just keep pushing me to that."

"You can lie to yourself, Asher, but not to me." he smirked. I didn't respond and just shook my head then climbed to bed. "I hate you." I blurted.

He chuckled and closed his eyes, "Go rest now, manager-lover boy." he teased. I didn't respond and we both went to sleep.