4~Manik's pov.

Manik's pov.

You need a reason to live, even i have a dream, goal and an achievement to succeed in.

Iam Manik Malhothra, born and bought up in mumbai, son of Raj malhotra and nyonika malhotra. I don't mingle with people so easily, i just love my parents and few friends, my childhood best friend is cabir dhawan.

The main reason why iam living is for ' my life nandini ' , i know you people must be shocked, but that's what the biggest reality of my life.

She is my childhood best friend. Iam 3 years elder than her, Iam very possisive about her since childhood, i started growing feelings towards her, when i was in 8th standard.

At first i thought it's a normal attraction, but then i started growing more possisive about her, that's when i came to know about our parents marraige plans about us.

That day i was out of world, i felt like nothing can stop me from making nandini mine. That was actually a freedom moment for me.

I maintained proper distance from her, when i actually came to know, i love her. Because I don't want to break our friendship with my feelings.

But, i eventually lost patience and control over my feelings many times, when she used to praise boys infront of me.

Typical boyfriend iam, isn't it?

I don't have interest in studies, iam rather a extracurricular activity person.

But, i have decided to do well in my studies. Ofcourse, for her.

I want to give her best life, I don't want to depend on my father's property nor interested in taking up his bussiness. I want to create my own identity, for my queen.

I want to give her world's happiness, not a single no should come from my mouth for her wishes. I decided myself to be a working machine, till i get her.

We started to chat through facebook, iam thankful to this app, it made me and nandini close. I came to know about her feelings, when iam pursuing my inter 2nd year.

She blurted it out, because of her fear to loose me.

Iam such a dick. I didn't react to her proposal at first. But, trust me iam a very happy soul on that day. I felt like, my heartbeat returned to me after listening it.

Like everyone, i too have some insecurities. I myself had doubts on my success.

what if, i fail to make her happy?

What if, I can't give her luxurious life? she shouldn't suffer for my deeds right?, That's why, i didn't react to her proposal.

We still used to chat like normal friends even after her proposal, she didn't bought up that matter after that.

I felt guilty for hurting her feelings. I promise, i never imagined any other girl in my life except her. But, I didn't express how much i love her, i need her, my heart beats only for her, iam living only for her.

What i came to know from others is, she cried alot. when iam going to Rajasthan for my bsc.agriculture.

Suddenly, i started growing restlessness about her when iam in my 1st year of bsc. She is not online from 3 days, because of her 10th board exams.

21 days, it's like tourture to me without talking to her.

This time period made me realize, that I can't stay away from her, I can't let her be with someone else except me, i can't even imagine her marrying someone else.

I just can't, I can't let her go, she is mine only mine and iam very possisive about what's mine. So, i determined myself to propose her after her exams.

I surprised her with my proposal, she is very happy, i can sense it.

I became sad, when i came to know she is going to pursue her inter in Hyderabad, that to hostel.

It's impossible to stay away from her without talking to her. I can't send off her to hostel, because of my exams.

Destiny is really cruel, when it comes to me. Because when iam coming to home for my semester holidays, she went.

I can't even contact her, Because cell phones are strictly prohibited in her collage.

After 1 month, which i felt like years. I decided to visit her collage this sunday. I can't take this anymore.

Iam sitting at home thinking about her day and night.

holidays sucks.

I lied to uncle about my friend's meet in Hyderabad, i can't just directly ask him right? Hehehe,.

And guess what? my plan worked. He himself asked me to visit nandini to which, i did salsa in my mind.

Nandini knows about my visit, uncle informed her.

I don't what she must be feeling, but iam very excited and even nervous at the same time. Because this will be the 1st meet after our proposal.

I didn't slept whole night, so i took a nap in journey. When i finally reached her campus, iam feeling hell nervous. I boosted up myself.

I still have to wait 30 mins to meet her, i sat on the vacant bench near her canteen scrolling my phone.

Iam totally loosing my patience, and this time is pissing me off. I helplessly looked up in a direction only to get mesmerized to see my love.

There she is, looking beautiful like a baby in navy blue and cream fork with black pants, she is devoid of any make up, i forgot to mention. She don't apply any make up, she is not interested in it.

Still she looked like goddess to me, with her high pony. But, i like her in open hair.

she is taking baby steps towards me. Like, iam some kind of monster and eat her alive if she comes to me.

She really looks like a baby infront of me, short and cute.

Even her behaviour will be like 2 years kid. Hahaha, i wondered what happens when she become mother of my child.

will she able to handle them? because she herself a baby.

But, for that we need to do some interesting and hard work right?

Ufff, stop thinking Manik Malhothra.

Keep a side your pervert mind and concentrate on what you came for.

I took a deep breathe to control my hormones, i can't help it. Iam a boy who is more passionate about romantic life.

I stood up, when she is about to reach me. She is looking down like something more interesting is going on ground.

' nandini, look at me..' my heart screamed.

She is fidging her fingers, biting her lips.

' no nandini, don't do that, don't bite them yaar' my mind screamed.

' shut up, you useless brain, Useful time pe tho use hotha nai. Always want to get into romantic zone. Think straight only straight.' my heart fought back.

' i can't be boring like you.' mind said.

Shut up you both, let me do my work. Both of them vanished.

Fucking harmones.

Okay, control. Don't observe her more manik. You might end up doing something stupid, which you will regret later.

I sighed and caught her hand which are trembling with cold sweat, i can sense it.

" Nandini"

She looked at me finally, i signalled her to sit.

We are sitting beside each other with complete silence, none of us dared to speak anything.

" Why your eyes are red aren't you sleeping properly?"

' May be thinking about me whole night ' heart thought.

' shut up, you fucking ashole. ' my heart glared at mind.

" Actually, yesterday night my friend nikki's bdy so." She said.

' suits yourself ' my heart laughed at mind.

" Nandini, we are searching for you in whole campus and you are sitting here." Three of her friends came in seach of her.

" And who is he?" One of them asked.

" Ahm, Guys he is manik Malhothra, my best friend i told you right?"

"Oooooo" all of them shouted.

Sound pollution.

" Manik, they are my friends. She is navya, shreya, nikki and it's her birthday today."

" Nice meeting you guys and happy birthday to you." i wished her.

" thank you. but nandu, best friend?" Nikki asked.

" You said boy.." before shreya could utter that word, navya closed her mouth.

I looked at nandini with confusion, she is glaring at them to stay quite.

My inner self giggled knowing they are teasing her, that means they know about me. Wow, now it will be interesting to tease her.

" Boy what?" I asked raising my eyebrow.

" Nothing, she just asking about something." Nikki covered it up.

But, iam not going to leave this topic. I smiled evilly.

" We need your phone to make a call." Navya asked me and i gave them my phone with this they went away.

Now, i can got time to talk to her.

But, how can i forget that my girl is pro in making numerous friends.

" Nandu, mom and dad came today. They are asking for you, come." Her another friend came pulling her.

" Soha, sorry yaar. I can't meet them today, vo manik came to meet me. So" she said Looking at me.

Her friend soha examined me from top to bottom and smiled mischievously, i frowned at her.

" Oh, so finally your lover boy is here. Hi, iam soha. your girl's friend." She said with double meaning.

I blushed lightly with her indirect sentence.

" Hi "

" Okay, nandu enjoy your time. I need to rush, I don't want to disturb your privacy." She winked at nandini to which nandini glared at her.

I was smiling like fool listening to the word ' privacy'. At once all my dirty thoughts aroused.

I looked at her, she is looking everywhere except me.

I gathered some courage and place my hand on her hand and interlocked them.

She is shivering with my mere touch, i smiled sensing my effect on her.

" Nandini, how's your studies going on?"

" Hmm, nice." Looking here and there.

I narrowed my brows with her simple answer.

Look at me nandini.

" Just nice, i mean how they are teaching and any difficulties?."

" Nothing." Again simle answer, why she is avoiding eye contact.

Fine, iam more than stubborn than you. I will see, till when you can avoid me.

" I love you " i blurted it out, in fraction of seconds she looked at me and immediately turned her gaze blushing.

Her cheeks became red competing with tomatoes. I want to bite them,.

cool...my stupid thoughts.

" Don't blush." I warned her to which, she blushed more.

Enough now, iam not responsible for the consequences.

I looked around whether to see anyone looking at us or not, luckily there are not so many people and buzy within themselves.

Taking the chance, i immediately pecked her cheeks.

Her eyes widened with shock and her free hand covering her mouth looking at me.

She is looking adorable like a doll, i chuckled at her expressions .

She is seriously a baby, my baby to pamper.

" You seriously did it." She asked looking around.

" Wanna try once again." I asked bending towards her.

" No" she immediately shouted. I chuckled.

" Vaise, you told your friends about us."

"Hmm" again hmm. This girl.

" Nandini, will you please speak up."

" Arey i speaking na." I raised my eyebrow.

" Okay, iam feeling nervous isliye. So, tell me." She asked.

" What? You should tell me, how's your collage life and friends."

" Nice, not to that extent which i have imagined. But, my friends are awesome." She said getting excited.

" So, what you said about us?"

" That, she loves you alot and will marry only you." Her friend shreya said who is coming behind her, navya is giggling along with her.

I blushed to their reply. " Look who's blushing." Said navya.

I covered it with glares. They smiled and went away giving us our so called private space.

We talked alot, i did lunch in her campus mess. I scolded her for not taking care of her health, even she is not taking her meals, instead prefering canteen junk.

I don't want to leave her, i know how hard it's for me to leave her. I want to hold her tight in my arms, i want to console her, i want to kiss her, i want to keep her with me forever.

But, I can't. we still had time for that. I need to control my feelings, I can't overload them on her, which will make our life complicated.

We need be like old friends where we used to control our emotions and stayed away, that's the better way to supress my innerself.

I don't want her to think about me and waste her time, i will make her feel out of world after marrying and that is for sure.

But, right now. We need to be like this.

All this while, i could feel whole campus gaze on me, they are talking to themselves seeing us and smiling.

Weird people. Infact, iam feeling like iam in zoo with different types of animals.

I chuckled mentally for my thoughts.

Ok. So, not only her friends. Whole campus know about us.

This girl iam telling you will make me crazy. But, i loved this feeling knowing she tagged herself as mine.

We still have only minutes to be together, i have to leave her.

This feeling is killing me.

" Nandu, so times up i think so. Shall i leave?"

Suddenly her smile vanished, she became dull.

Oh baby, don't make That faces. It's makes me more difficult to leave you.

" Ahem...nandu, remember one thing. We will get lot's of time to spend, when we get settled. Now, we need to focus on our career and good results. You should be concentrated towards your studies."

She smiled at me, but that's not enough i need to boost her up and i know how.

" Vaise once we get married, i will not leave you for a second. And If, your thinking about making babies then drop your plans. Because i need good quality to feel you."

Shut your stupid mouth manik malhotra, what's the need to get your romantic plans in between your talks.

She will think, that iam pervert.

'Hamesha, one track mind. Kabhi tho seedha soch' heart taunted my brain.

But, she is blushing and that's enough.

" Vo.. actually..i..need your num..number." she asked hesitating.

I narrowed my eyes, phones are not allowed right?

" I can call you at free time from reception."

What? Really? Oh my god, manik Malhothra you are in luck today. Finally, now i can go without worries.

"72******** this is my number, please don't forget to call me on free time. I will be waiting."

" I will manik." She is smiling.

I looked around, kissed her forehead hugging her tightly.

She is flabblastered, because all this happened within fraction of seconds before even realizing.

She is blushing, even me too. I left her bidding bye.

She used to call me almost daily and i will wait for her call like love sick puppy.

Sometimes i will even bunk class to talk to her.

She share everything about her with me, and i like to know more about her.

I don't have anything to share, iam a boring person. My day starts and ends with only her thoughts.

Except future plannings, i really don't have anything to share with her, she kept asking me everytime and i used to ignore.

I once asked her about the kiss thing, she said, she will kiss me after turning 18.

I almost fought with her for that stupid decision.

I even made challenge that i will kiss her before 18.

Everything is going well, until nandini's chacha's death happened. I want tell her, but I can't. Because of her inter board exams.

I visited her after one month of this incident, I tried to behave normal.

It became difficult for me to control my tears, but i have to do it for her. When she comes to know about it, she will hate me for sure.

As i expected it happened, she avoided contact with me for 9 months.

This made me mad on her, like really mad. I can't take this seperation.

Iam completely changed in this 9 months, making myself strong for any sorts of break ups.

This fear overcame my heart and mind, i want to bury all her memories and my feelings for her.

But, initially i failed in doing it.

My soul became happy when she again returned back to me on her 17th birthday.

That's when i realized, i can't even imagine to push her away from me.

I didn't ask her about that seperation thing, because i can understand her inner turmoil.

We again confessed. But, this time iam strong to deal with her. I want to make our bond strong.

We kissed after 4 months of this confession, i was a desperate soul.

I can't describe that moment, i felt alive after kissing her.

I applied for masters in london, i didn't inform anyone not even her. Because, iam not sure about it. I don't want to make her sad, let's see if i get selected or not.

I want to make love to her, before i leave.

I want her, i need her. I can't take this years of seperation between us, i just cant. So i decided to ask her about it.

I had convo about sex thing, she is really so shy, when it comes to that. Even iam hell nervous person, but i have to initiate this.

Finally, she agreed. But, after turning 18 and i respect her decision.

It's her 18 birthday after 5 mins, and here iam sitting on terrace with my phone. I know, she will wait for my call as it's special to her and even me.

Iam not this typical believer about special days, she knows it. I want to surprise her with my call. I want to see her happiness.

12 and it's time. But, something stopped me from calling her.

Ohh yaa, Instagram notification. I opened it only to get angry and jealous.

She is adding stories of their friendsss wishes.

Ok, some of them are boys from her 10th standard. I even know she calls them bro. But, my male ego stopped me.

I was burning with jealousy.

So, i dropped the idea of wishing her and sulking like baby. I debated myself for more than 2 hours, and every minute her stories are adding pouring fuel in me.

Finally, after calming myself. I messaged her at 3, when i got instant reply. I felt guilty and angry on myself for my stupidity.

I know she will be waiting for me, and here iam doing nothing instead thinking stupid things. I want to make her happy, but see at last i made her sad.

I lied to her and asked her to sleep.

I have an interview after one month in banglore, it's perfect to plan our first time. I thought.

Jealous overpowered me, i strongly determined to make her mine.

So, i asked her on same day on video call. I felt really excited, when she said she will fulfill her promise.

I got a news of preponing my interview. when i decided to tell her, i came to know she went Hyderabad to meet her friends, all alone.

WITHOUT INFORMING ME.

How dare she?

How can she? I mean alone? I was really angry on her. What if, something happens to her. You are so dead nandini murthy, you can manipulate your parents but iam not that easy.

Iam already so worked up and tensed about her, Now she is not picking up my calls. So, i called shreya.

I informed her about my interview and our travel.

I hope she got an idea about it, but i need to know about her comfort and even girl things, it's important.

Iam waiting for her arival at airport, she is late. I can't believe this.

but why? I was tense. i thought to call her.

But, stopped seeing her. I immediately took her in my arms feeling her presence .

Her friends started pulling my leg. but, they pulled wrong trigger talking about finding another groom for her. She is finding it funny, can you believe it?

Here, iam buring with jealousy, she is enjoying.

Once, we get alone time. i will show her what real enjoyment looks like.

After taking our seats, i kissed her showing my possisiveness.

I have insecurities in my mind, i trust her. But, my mind want to make her mine.

I initiated telling her about first time possibilities.

she blushed. but, agreed for it.

And IT'S TOMORROW.

Now, iam becoming an impulsive soul.

Control manik, tomorrow will be the best day in your life.

Iam hell nervous, but when it started i was in a extreme plessure world throughout our make out session.

I felt guilty when she cried in pain. I thought to back off. But, she consoled me boosting me up.

She is such a sweet heart.

She very well know about my desires for her. My heart, soul, mind every part of my body is jumping in happiness.

She is mine officially.

I had a best dinner, with lots of teasings and kissings.

What you need in life? Absolutely nothing. When i have my entire world infront of me.

I slept peacefully after ages in her arms. She is my peace and my soul is connected with her.

When i was getting ready for interview, i got email from london university saying that i was selected for masters.

For one second, my heart clenched. What iam supposed to do now, feel happy or sad?.

When I thought, i can spend more time with her. This thing came to me destroying my peace.

Without my realization tears came out of my eyes. I can't leave her when iam deeply connected with her. It's very difficult to decide.

Cabir consoled me saying i can do it. It just a matter of years.

That's when i realised. whatever iam doing, it's to make her happy. I have to leave her to make her life happy when we get married.

I came to her home, iam talking to uncle and aunt about my masters.

But, when i didn't got any reply from her. I looked up only to get angry.

Seriously? Here iam feeling suffocated to tell this thing and to leave her.

Madam is buzy in phone, smiling and blushing.

I so want to smash that person who is on other side making her blush.

I called her, she gave us confusing looks. It made me more angry. So, i simply left to upstairs.

I know she will come to her room.

i asked her, what she is doing with her phone, she said it's important.

I know she is pulling my leg, but wrong move baby.

I caught her, she is pleading me like baby to leave her. I found her cute and adorable.

Her blush, her smile. Iam going to miss her like hell. May be this is the last time to hug or kiss her.

Thinking about all this, instantly tears rolled in my eyes. But, i covered it up.

I will spend my entire night talking with her. I thought.

At dinner, it was fun pulling her leg infront of everyone.

When aunty told her about my masters, i waited for her reaction. she is in dilemma thinking about something.

She instantly got excited and wished me.

I somewhat felt it fake, but i need to give her sometime to think about it.

I will speak to her at night. After some tine, She went for sleep.

But, Sleep is far away from me, i want to be with her. It's my last to be close to her, but what if I can't control my emotions. I don't to break down infront of her making her sad.

After debating alot, i went to her. She is in deep sleep, i took her in my arms. I tried to talk, but she consoled me.

She is such a mature girl, perfect for me. No one can understand me well except her.

She is my soulmate.

I want to be in best position, when i propose her for marraige.

These 5 years felt like 5 decades for me. But, i controlled all my emotions and worked hard. Iam in best position now, with my job.

Today is her graduation day iam going to suprise her with our marriage news.

I know she will be happy, will jump into my arms.

I was waiting from years for this day. she will be with me forever.

Every minute, every second. From now.

I will pamper her like queen with all my love, which iam supressing from years. I will make her happy.

i will cook for her,

i will make her bath,

i will dress her up,

i will feed her,

I will shop for her,

I will take her to dates,

I will surprise her with my gifts,

i will pamper her like my baby.

She is key to my heart. And It's time to open it, finally.

I will do everything single thing, which iam dying to do in these years.

I was waiting for her to come home and there she is, in her graduation dress.

She was shocked to listen about our marriage. Her friends are happy for her.

Even, iam smiling like fool. She don't have any idea, how my heart is beating every second only for her.

" Nandini murthy, will you become Nandini manik malhotra by marrying me." I finally proposed her.

" No"

Her answer made my heart crush into million pieces. My whole life shattered in front of her.

She ran upstairs crying, even iam crying by now.

How can she say no? Why?

She can't just live me like that.

I need her, she is my oxygen. She is my reason to live. I can't even breathe without her.

Didn't she love me now?

Why she don't want to marry me?

Did she find someone else?

I suddenly felt suffocated with that thought. I didn't feel like breathing.

No,no i trust her.

There must be something, which iam absolutely missing.

I need to figure it out, before it becomes complicated.

I stood up rubbing my tears and said.

"I need to talk to her once."

With this, i ran behind her upstairs.

I can't let her go.

To be continued.....

precap : manik's consolation.

___________________

Hey people, here is the 4th volume of yhe story.

To publish 5th volume, it will take some time. it's under editing.

This story is available in WATTPAD.

PROFILE : @manikraj114.

love you guys.