Dirty Secret

TWO YEARS AGO

Claudette Deveraux

Kai popped his head into several rooms on the second floor, clearly looking for something. The million-dollar question was, what?

He eventually found his way to my brother's room and I imagine saw more of Xavier than he would have liked to. My brother had a habit of disappearing in discreet corners half-way through parties with the company of his date or someone else's. He'd once gotten caught with someone else's arm candy's head in his lap, but the gentleman was more amused than offended.

I followed Kai into the library when he didn't come out after a while. It was dark inside and I'd taken my heels off so as not to alert him to my presence.

He walked around the large space, browsing through the shelves. He clearly admired books and my mother's collection could rival the state library. I stayed in the shadows of the already dark room. I gathered from his not turning on the lights that he was snooping around my home for a reason and I wanted to know what it was.

He reached my mother's desk and began rifling through paperwork and checking her drawers. Not finding what he'd been searching for he eventually reached the safe in the floor under her desk.

He pulled out his phone, snapped a photo of the safe and, I assume, sent it to someone before shutting his screen off again. I noticed that he had his phone silenced and that he had spotted the safe very quickly. I was 7 when I realised there was something in the ground under my mother's desk and he saw it within five minutes of being in here. Then again, I hadn't been looking for anything. He clearly was. For someone with such a keen eye to detail, you'd think he would have spotted me by now.

The door to the library opened and before I could hide myself, I was engulfed in someone's embrace. I didn't shriek or push because I knew the scent.

Alastair Malraux.

Alastair and I had known each other since we were kids and had been lovers since I was 18. He was two years older and had waited until I was legal before confessing his feelings for me. We weren't dating exclusively, though. I didn't want to settle without testing the waters and he was happy to have fun elsewhere, so it took out a lot of the intensity. But I did notice the frustration in his eyes when I'd choose other companions over him. He liked having options but didn't like being one. His deep blue eyes were looking down at me with mischief while his strong arms tightened around my waist. I twisted my head to see Kai was no longer where he had stood earlier.

Turning back to Alastair I ask, "What are you doing here?"

He'd come with a date so he should have been busy.

He walked me backwards to the desk before setting me on top.

"I need you, precious." I hated the little pet name he'd given me when I lost my virginity to him at 15. He still used it when he was drunk and could I smell the bourbon on his breath.

"You came with a date." I accuse. I wasn't under any delusions about how he handled his girls but it was bad form to attend a party with someone and sleep with someone else.

"You jealous?" he whispers in my ear before crushing his lips on mine.

"No. I simply don't want to entertain you tonight."

Kai now knew that I had followed him in here. And he had a front row seat to my encounter with Alastair.

I'd managed to keep my arrangement with Alastair a secret. The only other person who knew was my brother. And now, Kai. I didn't want him to have access to my personal life, but I also didn't want to announce his presence to Alastair. The latter of whom was now kissing down my neck and spreading my thighs. He'd dropped to his knees, slipped my panties to the side and was about to start licking when I pushed myself back into the desk away from his reach.

"No!" I screeched.

His head snapped up at me, looking confused and a little hurt even.

"What's wrong?" he stood up and adjusted himself before helping me down.

"I'm not feeling it tonight. I want to be alone." That sobered him up and he nodded once before stepping back.

"I haven't seen you for three weeks." He rubbed his face, something he did when he was frustrated.

"And I'm sure that you haven't been alone in those three weeks." I counter.

"You can change that anytime, baby." He smirks and I must admit, he is beautiful. Classically so but still. His features had matured over the years but he had the kind of looks you knew would age like fine wine if taken care of properly. But I just couldn't look at him and feel more than friendship. I liked sleeping with him, liked that I didn't have to try, liked that he knew everything there was to know about me, but I'd gotten bored of Alastair before I'd even kissed him. You might think it was wrong of me to keep him around, that it gave him false hope, but he was the one who insisted that I would some day see things his way.

"I don't want to. Why aren't you with your date?" I switch tactics. I had no intention of having this conversation while Kai listened.

"With your brother." He smirked, pulling out a cigarette from his back pocket and lighting it.

Of course.

"What the hell is wrong with you two?" I shove him in the chest. I hated when they did that.

"She wanted it." He raised his hands as if to say "what could I do?"

You could have stayed downstairs and let me spy on my instructor while he spied on my mother. That's what you could have done, you useless fuck.

And now, instead of me finding out what Kai was up to, he would know my dirty secret.

"Go back to the party. I'll come find you later." I push him towards the exit. He blows the smoke out as he goes.

"Is that a promise?"

"Sure." I slam the door in his face.

Turning to face the music, I call out.

"You can come out now."