Dealing With Sam

"(y/n)?"

Looking up from the laptop Bobby instructed her to use for research, (y/n) meets the green eyed gaze of Dean. Walking into the living room, he holds two water bottles in his hand, a tired smile pulling at his lips

"How're you feeling, Dean?" she asks the question softly, knowing he has been riddled with anxiety these past 24 hours. He shrugs his shoulders, trying his best to hide his worry with a smirk

"Doing fine, sweetheart-" He tosses one of the water bottles over to her, chuckling lightly when she clumsily catches it ,"-how's research coming along?"

"I haven't found anything yet. At least-" She sighs and clicks onto a few more news articles ,"-nothing supernatural."

Dean nods in understanding. (y/n), staring at the man when he's not looking, finds herself smiling lightly. His personality was softer today, more open to her presence. After yesterday, she felt as if the man had grown closer to her as a friend instead of just some monster partner. She hoped it stayed that way, she couldn't imagine parting with the boys anytime soon.

"Has he woken up at all?" Dean's voice pulls the girl out of her thoughts, (e/c) eyes looking to where he was motioning. There, on the couch since yesterday, was Sam. Chest rising and falling as he furrowed his eyebrows in his sleep. He passed out the moment they walked in through the door, tossing and turning on the couch while whimpering. She shakes her head

"He's been having nightmares all day" She explains sadly.

"Doesn't surprise me..." Dean replies thoughtfully, staring down at his brother. (y/n) furrows her eyebrows, curiosity overtaking her

"Why is he like that?" She asks Dean tenderly. It takes him a moment to answer, unsure how to explain to the girl. Sitting down onto the coffee table in front of Sam, Dean lets out a tired sigh. She readies herself for a story

"Remember all that stuff that happened a few months back?"

"Fires, floods, disease-" She nods her head ,"-I remember. It felt like the world was ending"

"That's because it was"

"Let me guess-" (y/n) leans back into her chair, arms crossing themselves over her chest as she continues ,"-you were the ones that saved the planet?"

"Sam and I...were the vessels for two archangels-" Dean explains slowly, eyebrows furrowing as he recalls the memory ,"-Lucifer and Michael. They were supposed to fight, but it would have killed billions of people. The only way to stop it, was to put them into a cage."

"A cage?" She echoes in confusion. Dean nods

"Some magic box powerful enough to trap them-" Motioning over to his sleeping brother, Dean continues explaining ,"-Sam jumped right in, taking Lucifer with him."

"How did he get out?"

"Cas. Pulled him out without his soul though, so we had to call in a favor from Death."

"That's why his soul is like that..." (y/n) says thoughtfully, voice quiet as she looks upon Sam's sleeping form.

"Like what?"

"Mangled"

There's a pensive silence that falls upon the pair, (y/n) watching the side of Dean's stubbled face as he nods slowly. Clearing his throat, he asks her a question he's been asking himself the past few weeks

"Do you think he'll get through it?"

"Yes" She doesn't hesitate to answer, catching Dean off guard. Turning to face the girl, he searches her (e/c) eyes, almost as if waiting for her to take it back.

"How do you know?"

"Because-" She starts, a confident smiling pulling at her soft lips ,"-he has people by his side to help him through it."

Dean doesn't respond, staring at the girl with a gentle fondness he found himself surprised at feeling. Before, (y/n) was just a creature. Another monster on his shit list for just existing. Now, she's transformed into something even stranger than the supernatural. A person with blinding hope for something better in the future and a heart that could take in a broken group of hunters without second thought. (y/n) reminded him of Sam in that way.

"Dean" His thoughts are interrupted by her voice, focus returning to her form as she motions behind him. Turning around, his green eyed gaze lands on his brother, a pained look overtaking his features. (y/n) watches as the Winchester reaches out a hand to shake Sam, flinching slightly when he jolts awake. When he determines the man to be conscious enough to hear him, Dean scoffs lightly

"That's 12 hours straight, buddy-" Dean hands, the somewhat out of it, Sam the second water bottle he was carrying, "-I'm calling that rested. Hydrate."

Sam slowly takes the clear plastic bottle from Dean's grasp, wincing slightly when he mistakenly grabs the water with his injured hand. Sam tries to play off the pain, hoping that Dean didn't notice. Little did he know, Dean's been carefully watching his every move

"Thanks-" He chuckles tiredly ,"-breakfast in bed"

"Yeah, don't get used to it-" reaching out, Dean gently grabs a hold of Sam's wrist ,"-let me see that hand."

(y/n) watches curiously as Sam seems distracted, light eyes glancing to a chair in the corner. Following his gaze, her eyebrows furrow upon seeing the sight of a pile of books. Scanning the small area some more, her concern for him only grows when she can't find anything. Turning her attention back onto the pair of bodies near the couch, she watches as Dean slowly pulls back the blood soaked gauze wrapped tightly around Sam's palm. Beneath the white bandage was the swollen wound she had messily cauterized to stop it's bleeding, light skin stained red from the blood that seeped out of the gaps she had missed

"Yeah, you'll live" Dean releases the man's hand and leans back into his seat on the coffee table, running his fingers through his dirty blonde hair. Sam turns to (y/n), small form sitting at Bobby's desk as she scrolls through countless news articles

"So-" He begins with a tired sigh ,"-ooze invasion...any leads?"

(y/n) shakes her head, (e/c) eyes glancing to see the disappointment in Sam's eyes. Just then, Bobby makes his way into the living room, wrapping a dark flannel around his body

"I got all my feelers out-" He states confidently, taking a seat next to (y/n) to watch her scroll through the research she's been piling up ,"-whatever they're up to, it ain't about going Mothra down main street. They'll turn up, you know, considering how eager they seemed to stretch their legs."

"(y/n)-" Sam calls out her name, watching her head slowly turn to listen to him ,"-is there anything you could tell us about these things? You seemed to know them..."

Suddenly, all of the attention is on her, eyes staring at her form as she lets out a sigh. Leaning back into the dark stained chair, she focuses her gaze onto her own hands as her fingers tap nervously against the desk.

"If we're being technical here...The Leviathan are my ancestors" She begins to explain, feeling her skin crawl at the thought of them ,"Primordial beasts too destructive to exist, but too powerful to kill. The perfect monster. I'm afraid that's all I know though. Up until 2 days ago, I didn't even know they were real. I always thought they were just scary stories told to monster kids to keep them from misbehaving. I'm sorry..."

"It's alright, (y/n)" Sam quickly reassures her, offering an understanding smile.

"That just means you're in the same boat as us" Bobby adds with a sigh, leaning back against his own chair, nudging her softly with his elbow. Dean, clears his throat suddenly, catching the groups attention

"Since we don't have any progress on our big bad, let's move onto our next problem-" He turns his green eyed gaze onto his brother ,"-How are you doing? And do not say 'okay' or I will actually hit you."

"I'm not okay" Sam's answer seems to surprise everybody, eyes widening as he states his diminishing mental health with a confidence they never would have expected. Dean scoffs lightly

"You think?"

"Hey-" Bobby gives Dean a hard stare, father like empathy lacing his next words ,"-go a little easy on him"

"There's nothing easy about it, Bobby, okay? We acted like he had everything under control-"

"I get it-" Sam is quick to intervene, soft voice trying to de-escalate the situation ,"-I'm sorry...I didn't exactly want to crack up, you know?"

"What the hell happened back there?" Dean interrogates him, frustration shielding his vulnerable worry for his brother. Sam is hesitant to answer, bright eyes avoiding the group's faces as if he were ashamed to tell them what was going on. (y/n) notes the way his gaze seems to travel back to the same chair from before, musty books piled high on it's wooden surface.

"Well, it's not just flashbacks anymore"

"Well, then what is it?" Dean presses further, body leaning to listen intently to his brother's explanation. (y/n) catches his blue eyes moving back towards the chair, eyebrows furrowing as if he were listening to something.

"It's more like..." he sighs tiredly, fingers dancing along the wound on his palm ,"I'm seeing through the cracks."

"What does that mean?"

"It means I'm having a difficult time figuring out what's real."

"Hallucinations?"

"For starters..."

Dean seems to grow agitated, nostrils flaring as he runs an anxious hand through his short hair. (y/n) and Bobby watch as he stands from his seat, body pacing as if he wasn't sure what to do in that moment

"Well, for starters, if you're trippin' hell's bells, why would you hide that?" He asks Sam angrily, hurt evident on his face. (y/n) could tell that the frustration was coming from a place of love, a big brother afraid of not being able to help his family. She just hoped Sam knew that too

"I wasn't hiding it, Dean-" Sam tries to defend himself, eyes growing misty as he stares up at his brother ,"-I-I was just not talking about it...I mean, it seemed like you guys had enough going on as it was! I-I just figured I should try to hold on to the safety bar and ride it out, you know?"

(y/n) watches silently, concerned growing in her (e/c) orbs, as Sam continues to share small glances over at the chair. His body tenses up. Recalling the story Dean had told her about what had happened to him, she was slowly creating a theory of her own on what Sam may be going through at the moment. His sneaky gazes towards the same empty spot in the room only confirmed her suspicions.

"It's getting more specific..." His voice is fragile as he says this, not wanting to go into further detail.

"Sam-" (y/n) calls his name softly, watching as he slowly turns to meet her worried gaze ,"-are you seeing Lucifer?"

The question seems to shock everybody in the room, the two older men staring at her through widened eyes as she keeps her focus on the youngest Winchester. He nods slowly.

"He's making you believe everything around is fake, isn't he?" She asks the question gently. Treating the broken man as if he were glass, (y/n) imagines her voice as pebbles. She had to be careful. Sam nods again.

"He convinced me-" He starts slowly, unsure how to explain ,"-that I'm still in the cage with him. That this life isn't real"

"Sam, why would the devil holodeck you a whole new life-" Dean tries to get his brother to understand, almost offended that Sam would believe something like that ,"-when he could just kick your ass all over the cage?"

"'Cause, as he puts it, you can't torture someone who has nothing left for you to take away..." Sam recites the line as if he's heard it a million times before, light eyes glancing over to the empty chair again.

"Okay, fine, but this malibu dream mansion that he makes for you to take away-" Dean dramatically motions around the room ,"-is this post-apocalyptic mess?"

Sam doesn't answer for a moment, focusing completely on the dark wooden chair in the corner, blue eyes unable to peel themselves away from the cluttered pile of books resting upon it. The group catches his intense stare, turning to follow his gaze.

"Sam..." (y/n)'s voice is nervous, unsure how to react to the answer she's about to get from him ,"Are you seeing Lucifer right now? Is he in the room with us?"

He nods slowly, eyes growing teary as he avoids everybodies concerned gazes.

"You know that he's not real, right?" Dean asks his brother, almost desperate now for him to understand. It takes another moment for Sam to answer, a singular tear escaping from his light eyes as he takes in a shaky breath. Turning to his brother, he smiles bitterly

"He says the same thing about you..."