Chapter 17: See Through Me

Chapter Text

"Harry?" Theo's rich, warm voice filled his ears and soothed away any fears.

"T-theo?" Harry croaked. His throat was dry and everywhere ached all over. He opened his mouth to speak again and whimpered instead. It hurt to speak.

"Shhh, my treasure." Theo soothed. "You fainted in Potions, they took you to see Madam Pomfrey and Terius intercepted on your behalf, so we're in Draco's Head Boy rooms again. It's alright. Everything is fine." Theo slipped an arm around the slender shoulders and eased him upright. "You've been out for over a day. Everything is fine. Water?" He held up the glass to parched lips. "Drink slowly or it will cramp your stomach and I do not have any stomach-cramp-reliever to spare."

Harry tried, but it was hard not to gulp the cool liquid as frantically as he wanted. The rest of him processed his new surroundings and the fact that he was neatly tucked in bed, in clean pyjamas and cuddled up against Theo as he'd been a few days ago. Huh. Then Theo had said something else about sleeping for over a day. Harry nearly groaned. He thought he'd managed to get out of that over the weekend. He'd forgotten to take his usual doses of Pepper-up to pull him through the week. It would figure that that his luck would run out in the one class where he didn't want it to. He hoped he hadn't caused too much of a scene, but then again, his life seemed to revolve around drama, it would only figure that he had.

A faint blush colored his pale cheeks and he twisted away from the nearly empty glass.

"Enough?" Theo set the glass aside and wrapped his arms around him once more, offering warmth and comfort without hesitation. "Are you awake now or still tired?"

Harry thought about it. He nodded.

"Awake?" Theo prompted.

Harry nodded.

"How are you feeling?"

Harry glared at him.

Theo chuckled softly. "I take that as a negative."

"Oh Really?" Harry rolled his eyes, sarcastic.

Theo's smile softened. "No, really, Harry. How are you? Is there anything I can do to help?"

Harry clenched his hands in the warm sheets. He didn't know how he felt and he didn't really care. He was just tired and cranky and frustrated. This whole sleeping randomly everywhere business was wearing on his last nerve and he didn't know how much longer he'd be able to keep it together. It didn't help that Theo seemed to think that he could help. He couldn't. Harry was sure of it. If there was someway to handle the sleeping fits, he would've found it by now. It seemed his best hope was just to wait it out. "M'fine." He muttered.

"You don't look fine."

"I'm fine." Harry repeated, a little clearer. Couldn't Theo just take a hint? He didn't want to deal with this now. Things were always complicated when other people were involved. Maybe he'd be able to make a trip to Madam Pomfrey and asked about…something. He didn't know what and he doubted she did either, but he couldn't go on like this.

Not for very long, anyway.

"…Harry!" Theo waved a hand in front of his face, worry creasing his pointed features. "What's wrong?"

"Everything?" Harry retorted. "Look, I'm fine!"

"If fine is snapping my head off, then I suppose you are." Theo frowned. "What's wrong?" No answer. "Please answer, Harry. I'd like to help if I can."

"You can't!"

"You don't know that."

"Yeah I do!"

"How?"

"Look, I'm just tired, okay? Dead tired! I'm exhausted and I can't even think straight. I just want to get some rest, can't you see that?"

Theo's frown deepened. "Dead tired?" He repeated, with some trepidation. "Harry, that's not…normal."

"Of course." Harry sneered. "How could it possibly be normal when it comes to me? I'm never normal! I'm just an abnormal freak who can't keep a handle on his freakishness and-"

"Harry!" Theo interrupted, the worry now fully pronounced as he felt Harry's forehead and then his neck, even as the smaller boy batted his hands away. "You shouldn't—that's not true. You're not a freak and I don't know whatever gave you that idea, but right now-"

"Right now I just want to go to sleep! How hard is that to understand?"

"Not hard at all!" Theo ground out. "I'm just trying to help. You shouldn't feel like this since we've already-"

"Since what? Since I found a mate? So now my life's supposed to be all roses and perfection because I-"

The bitter edge in Harry's voice made Theo's expression darken by several degrees. "That is not what I meant and I will not allow you to change the subject or use a temper tantrum to cover-"

"A temper tantrum?" Harry sputtered. "I'm not—I—how dare you!" He fumed. "You hardly know me! You don't know anything about-!"

"I know right now that something is wrong and you won't let me help you."

"As if you could help." Harry mocked. "How could you help? Huh? How could you help? I don't even know what the-"

Theo growled, faintly.

Harry swallowed and silently forced himself to count to ten and breathe deep. This conversation was getting out of hand and he was too tired to deal with it. He might end up saying things that he wasn't ready to handle—things that probably shouldn't even be said, considering how tired he felt right now. It ahdn't been anywhere near this bad the last time he'd had the sleeping fits. He swallowed the groan that threatened to come up. His life really was some screwed up television drama. "Look, I'm tired, okay?"

"I understand. I'm not trying to-"

"I don't care what you're trying to do! Just leave me alone!"

Theo pressed his lips together and silently rolled his eyes skyward. That had to be the most contradictory statement he'd heard out of Harry yet. The boy still clung to him, half-wrapped around his waist and half-buried in the sheets. In spite of the words coming out of his mouth, Harry's body was singing an entirely different song. "I will—as soon as you tell me what's wrong? What's going on, Harry? Please, just talk to me!"

"M'tired!" The exclamation was whiny and frustrated. "I just want to sleep!'

"And you will. How long have you felt like this? Has it happened before?"

"It's nothing new." Harry mumbled into Theo's shoulder. He didn't want to keep talking about this, but he liked the thought of giving up his cuddle even less. Theo hadn't pushed him away yet.

"I didn't quite catch that." Theo prompted. "Harry?"

"Long time."

"Is this the first time?"

"No."

"Second?"

"Don't know."

"Third?"

"Don't know!"

"But you've felt it before?" Theo tried. This was harder than he'd expected, but he was Slytherin, surely there was a way to make this work out without causing so much stress on both halves. "Harry?"

"Yes."

"Did anything else happen?"

"No."

"Harry, I need you to tell me-"

"Leave me alone already!"

"…I'm not trying to force you to tell me anything you don't feel comfortable sharing, but your health is my concern."

"I didn't ask for your concern!" Harry pulled away. "I don't want it! I'm fine! I've always been fine. Just…just leave it!"

Theo didn't force him to stay, but he did growl again to voice his displeasure—a little louder than the first time.

Harry froze, but then ignored it and continued. He didn't care. It wasn't any of Theo's business—not yet, anyway—he had no real right to be asking that. No real right. His mind whispered. Just the fact that he's your mate…and your alpha…and you should probably stop twisting things around to make it all look right in your head. Nothing else happened. He wriggled out from the comfortable position inside Theo's arms to rest on a cool section of the bed, turning his back to the older boy. He didn't want to deal with this now. He didn't want to deal with it period. It was confusing and frustrating. Everything was frustrating.

Another yawn came up and Harry snuggled into the sheets as his tired eyes closed and sleep claimed him once more.

Maybe it was all just a bad dream.

When he woke again, Harry found himself cuddled in those familiar arms, with soft whuffs of breath ghosting over his face. A careful examination showed that Theo was fast asleep and Harry realized that he'd shifted at some point in time and gone back to the warmth and comfort of his mate's arms. He hesitated for a moment, surprised to find himself wide awake after all the exhaustion he'd been through.

After a moment, their previous conversation registered and suddenly, Harry felt ashamed. Theo had only been offering to help and he'd been more than rude. Sure, he'd brushed off Ron, Hermione and Ginny—even the twins—several times before and they'd always backed down and left him alone. He hadn't expected Theo to be so persistent—then again, the boy was Slytherin and Harry should've known that the snakes didn't like secrets kept from them. He nibbled on his lower lip for a moment. He'd been rude, yes, but he'd done it on purpose. He'd just wanted Theo to leave him alone—to stop asking the questions that led to answers that he didn't want to consider yet.

To answers that hurt.

He was lucky. Very lucky. Theo seemed to have a world of patience at his disposal—Ron and Hermione had blown up at him a few times before they'd even got a quarter as far into the conversation as Theo had. Yet, Theo hadn't minded and even though Harry had been the one to pull away, Theo had let him snuggle back up without question.

A bitter taste curled at the back of his tongue and Harry fretted. He didn't deserve this. He didn't deserve it at all. The guilt grew deeper and wound around him until Harry finally struggled against the arms that suddenly seemed to be ten-times heavier than he could recall. He squirmed, wriggled and fought, but the arms remained tight around him and Theo seemed oblivious to his movements.

A sound bubbled up in his throat and before Harry even realized it, he'd shrieked in his displeasure—a harsh screeching sound that nearly made him wince, despite the fact that he'd been the one to voice it.

The sound of distress had Theo awake within seconds and suddenly, forcefully, hovering over him, with Harry flat out on his back and Theo with his Dragel wings stretched out in full span, his lips curled in a half-snarl, threatening, ready to tackle whatever threat had dared approach his mate. He took a few breaths, the magic tangling visibly in the air as it swirled around the duo.

For a moment, both boys blinked at each other.

Then Harry blushed and tried to look anywhere else but at that gorgeous expanse of defined chest and abs.

Theo offered an apologetic smile as he carefully straightened, leaning back from where he'd straddled Harry a moment before. His wings began to recede into his back and for the first time, Harry could truly appreciate his mate's beauty, even as those gorgeous deep brown wings fluttered away. He reached for them, without thinking and suddenly, they came forward again and he could touch them, stroke them and feel them. Shiny golden scales of various hues were sprinkled along the lower half of each wing and along each ridge, the wings themselves were cool to the touch, smooth and hard.

They fluttered delightedly at his touch and Harry found himself fighting the urge to nuzzle over every available square inch within reach. He didn't think Theo would appreciate it—not yet anyway—and the very fact that he processed the thought made him drop it.

For a moment, neither said anything.

Harry reverently ran his fingers up and down one knobbed ridge, marveling at the texture and the rippling muscles as they flexed in the soft light within the room. He watched as Theo's body morphed to take on the other traits, the face scales, the claws and the cat-eyed pupils. His jaw dropped when he caught sight of the slightly pointed ears and two silver rings in each lobe. Those most certainly weren't visible in Theo's human form. Tentatively, he reached for them with one hand.

A happy, rumbling purr filled the room as Theo leaned into the soft touch.

They stayed like that for a minute and then Harry couldn't help himself anymore. He leaned forward and gently nuzzled Theo's neck. He breathed in the heady scent of chocolate, orange and that hint of steel that he couldn't ignore—when no response came immediately, he nosed the column of pale flesh a little more insistently and whined.

Worry began to set in and he turned his attention to his alpha's face, pressing his cheek to Theo's warm one, he rubbed insistently, back and forth. Then, he gave a small lick to the underside of that pointed chin. Another whine escaped, this one a little louder than the first. Why didn't Theo respond?  Harry buried his face in Theo's warm neck and fought the sudden stinging in his eyes that warned him of tears of come. This was ridiculous! He didn't even—it was just like it'd been with Terius. He couldn't help himself. He drew in a shaky breath and began to straighten up to pull away as the depressing thoughts cascaded inward in full force. What had he been thinking? Of course Theo wouldn't accept, Harry didn't deserve to be this close if he was such a horrible mate and-

Familiar long fingers slid upwards to tangle in his hair and held his head straight. Theo gently rubbed his cheek in return and then pulled away, in spite of Harry's whine, keeping the smaller Dragel still with the hand fisted in his hair. "Oh Harry." He sighed. "I have already explained that I will not smother you. I have no desire to cage you or break you in any way." Serious golden eyes locked onto shimmering emerald ones. "However, there is one thing I will never compromise on." Harry flinched, reflexively. Theo pretended not to notice, but the hand in Harry's hair, gentled—faintly. "I will never compromise on your health. You may dislike this, you may resent me for it, you may hate me for it, but I will never change this. I would ask that you do not lie to me in the future. When I ask you, how you are feeling, how you are doing, or if I inquire after your health—I do so in all honesty. I would rather hear, 'I have a headache' than, I'm fine. So that I can fix that headache and then you will be fine." He began to stroke the wayward locks of hair. "Your health is your wellbeing and your wellbeing is extremely important to me. I ask you, because I care. I want to know the real answer. I don't want to hear whatever excuse you may have rehearsed in private and even if there is nothing you think I can do—I will do all that I can, anyway. Do you understand this?"

There was a long pause.

Harry squirmed a bit and looked away a few times. Then finally, he leaned his head forward to escape the hand in his hair.

Theo let him.

Harry nibbled on his lower lip and then, finally he twisted his hands in his lap. "I don't want to hate you." He said, finally. "I don't want to dislike you or resent you…I….I just don't."

"I did not say that you would. I said you might." Theo explained. "You very well may not. I only wish to impress the seriousness of this upon you."

Two delicate fangs peeked over the edges of Harry's sorbet lips as he nibbled them in thought. "You just want to take care of me." He said, at last. "You would do this…that…because you care?" Harry really didn't like the way this conversation was going. Perhaps he'd been a little more…snappish, than he'd intended, but it was hard to break a habit that was now sixteen years strong. No one had ever really cared what he ate, when, why or how and he'd been fine with that—mostly.

Those slender hands suddenly caught his shoulders in a surprisingly strong grip. "Yes."

"You really care?"

"I care for you more than anything, my treasure. I merely want you to know that I do not want this to happen again."

"This?" Harry blinked up at him.

"This is our first…disagreement, of sorts." Theo said, kindly. "I understand that there will be many more, for we are different and there are still things we do not know of each other and of what we are. I understand that. You were correct. There is much we have to learn about each other, but it will take time. I do not wish to handle our disagreements in the way you chose just now."

Harry blushed.

"I would rather you simply explain that you do not wish to discuss it or ask me to change the subject—clearly. I do not like being manipulated or patronized any more than you do and I know you understand that. We are both mature enough to speak our minds to each other and trust. We cannot expect anything worthwhile to come out of this mating if there is no trust between us. I am not going to make up some list or lecture you, but I do expect you to at least hear me out on my own point of view. My only point at this time, is your health. Do not think I have not noticed that you do not fill your own plate and that you eat even less of what is put on it? Or that you've been swallowing energy-potions like candy every now and again? Or that you're much thinner than even some of the third-years in Slytherin house?"

Harry swallowed and looked away.

Theo let him. "You need to be eating some form of raw meats as well and I have yet to see you partake in any of that, nor have the elves that serve us, have anything to say on the subject."

"Elves?" Harry straightened. "What elves?" His thoughts immediately flickered to Dobby. He hoped the little house elf hadn't gotten into any trouble of any kind. He'd always managed to bring Harry whatever he requested, no matter how bizarre or what time of day.

"Toppy and Middles." Theo frowned. "My apologies, I forgot that you wouldn't know. Terius brought them with him—sort of. They bring us foods we are more used to eating, at least, foods that our Dragel forms find acceptable. You need only call for them and the password is Leifborne. Then simply request what you wish to eat—meat, fruit, nuts or such and they will bring it for you." The honey-golden eyes narrowed faintly. "Your inheritance is new, isn't it?"

Harry fought the urge to scowl. This conversation had taken an odd turn, but he could still feel a faint itch tugging at him. Making him want to go back to nuzzling Theo's neck and further along the lines of seducing his alpha rather than paying attention to the current conversation. That train of thought made him blush spectacularly and he looked away, hoping Theo wouldn't, but knowing that he wouldn't fail to notice the sudden redness on his face. "Yes."

"You need to be eating more." Theo sighed. "Simply try to eat a little more than you are at present." He gently squeezed the thin shoulders. "It would be a bad reflection on me, if I could not keep one mate properly fed."

Harry almost smiled. "It's not your fault."

"But it is now part of my responsibility." Theo countered. "Which brings us back to my point. Your health, Harry. Do you understand this? There is no argument here. No negotiations of any sort. I will not change on this. Understood?"

A small pout appeared, but Harry reluctantly agreed. "Yes."

"Good." Theo brightened considerably and he drew Harry forward, tilting his head back to kiss and lick the newly exposed throat. A trail of soft kisses were planted along the soft, vulnerable column and Harry visibly relaxed. His alpha hadn't forgotten—in fact, his alpha had accepted his apology—his whole apology! The itchy feeling melted away and he snuggled into the embrace as Theo's arms came up to wrap around them and then, those warm lips covered his own and Harry easily lost himself in the pleasurable sensations that followed.

The snogging session that followed was quite enjoyable in virtually every possible way, until Theo pulled away, leaving a rosy-cheeked, flushed and panting Harry staring at him with a stricken expression. Theo chuckled. "You are irresistible, my precious treasure." He murmured, leaning forward and easing Harry downward to the bed. "And you are tempting me far beyond what little restraint I possess."

Emerald eyes blinked innocently up at him, imploring, almost in their earnest gaze.

Theo smirked. "Not tonight." He hummed. "I refuse to take this any further until I know there is some semblance of understanding rattling around in that blissfully empty head of yours." He settled back on the bed, sitting on his heels, to one side of Harry.

"Hey!"

The insult was soothed with a kiss to the side of the scar on his forehead. "Accio lightspeed glasses." Theo snatched up a pillow from the bed and held it up as something thwacked into the soft material. It fell into his lap and he plucked it up with two fingers. "Take those off and put these on." He waved towards Harry's glasses. "Why are you wearing them anyway? Surely your sight was corrected with the arrival of your inheritance." He frowned. "Then again, I suppose it ignored the scar for a reason."

"Curse scars don't just vanish." Harry said, softly. He obediently slipped the gold-rimmed glasses off and held his face steady as Theo slipped the new pair of ruby-red rimmed optics on. "Maybe…some day." He blinked and squinted, waiting for his eyes to adjust as they should. "What are these for?"

"Exactly what I said." Theo waved his hand in the air. "For quick reading. You, my dear, need a crash course in exactly what a Dragel is. Accio Nott family complete encyclopedia." The book flew through the air and landed solidly in his expectant hand. He cracked it open, flipping quickly through the pages. "Read from here, to here." He pointed and held up a section of the gilt-edged pages. "Shouldn't take more than a minute." He added the last words when Harry gave him The Look. "Just read it, Harry." He huffed. "Don't even tell me that you're not the slightest bit curious about why you've been so tired, what's going on with-"

"Why can't you just tell me?" Harry glared at him.

"Because some portions of the book are spelled so that only a submissive may read them."

Harry blinked. What?

"It is part of the protection." Theo shrugged. "So that others cannot take advantage of those with Dragel heritage. There are always those who would do everything that they could, to see that those books that declare us extinct tell the truth. Just read the book, Harry! You'll find answers I can't really give you—or ones that you probably would not believe even if I did tell you." Theo said, dryly.

Harry gave him The Look again, but after a minute, Harry turned to the book and the moment his gaze fastened on the pages, they began to turn rapidly at an inhuman pace. The glasses glowed a faint red hue as Harry all but absorbed the knowledge trapped within the ancient pages.

It was a long moment before he finally took the glasses off and handed them over to Theo. The older boy took them wordlessly and then the encyclopedia when Harry handed it over as well.

There was a long silence.

Then Harry reached for him.

"Want to talk to Terius or would you rather go back to sleep?"

Harry nibbled his lip. "Those my only options?"

"Your well-being, my responsibility." Theo murmured. "Either take a nap or we'll talk to Terius."

"He's probably in class."

"Then you can nap until he's out."

"Theo!"

"I did not just give you that book for sheer entertainment value." He tapped Harry's nose, lightly, with one finger. Then those long-fingered hands slipped from his hair to rub little circles on his temple in gentle, soothing motions. He didn't say a word, but then again, he didn't have to.

"Fine, fine. I'll nap." Harry stifled a yawn. That felt nice. It felt nice in lots of ways. He was still tired, but it wasn't worrying him as much as it had some time ago. The book had helped—some. He could follow Theo's train of thought, faintly. Talking to Terius would help, if he could. There were some things he wanted to know.