Antonella

I woke up today feeling that it would be a great day, but that vanished when I received the news that my best friend had been in an accident.

Valentina and I met at The Diamentris School, one of the most expensive schools in our small town of Roswest Town.

I was an awkward student, not good at studying, not yet.

Valentina is one of those people who helps her friends study, and always supports you to be better than others. She was one of the most popular people in school, she didn't hang out with the nerds because she didn't need them, she was always the smartest one in class.

Valentina is a very beautiful girl, with beautiful red hair, freckles, almost blue eyes, average height and fair complexion; everybody wanted to be with her.

I still don't understand why she wanted to be my friend.

I was, well, I'm still the same carefree girl in school, but with great ambitions. I have blond hair, green eyes that at times I hid behind my glasses, I'm a little scandalous to others but that was okay for Valentina.

She and I have always understood each other very well, so much so that we both wanted to study the same career together at the same university.

We both studied business at The Wester University, one of the best private universities in the state of San Francisco.

When I got the call from Valentina's mother telling me what had happened, I couldn't help but think about what I had gone through some time ago...

She reminded me of the only person I ever loved and who never remembered me again. He was two years older than me, I knew him all my life, he was my neighbor, at summer camp when I was fourteen and he proposed to me; we were together for two years, it was my big secret, I wanted him for me, he was crazy about me and I was crazy about him.

It all ended when he had an accident while crossing the street and was run over, since then he lost his memory and never remembered again. I always went to visit him in the hospital, but he never received me, he ran away from his friends and me; I never saw him again.

Sometimes I wonder what happened to his life. I would like to tell him how much I love him and miss him.

I hope he is well.

Coming back to reality...

I enlisted and went to the hospital.

There I was, in bed, not waking up, connected to so many machines, so helpless.

It was like that for a while, until one day he woke up.

She didn't remember anything, the same thing had happened to her as to my old love.

She was devastated.

After a few days, she began to mention a name, Eros.

That name was familiar to me, it was the same as...

I couldn't think about that now.

I grabbed Valentina's cell phone and decided to call the person she mentioned so much, but I couldn't find her contact anywhere, so I decided to open her archived conversations and found him.

Hello, Eros, is that you? - I said.

- Yes, it's me, who is this? - he answered seriously.

Hello, this is Antonella, Valentina's friend - I answered.

- What's up, if you're calling to talk about her, the truth is uncomfortable for me - he answered dryly.

I'm sorry to interrupt you, but... - I felt I couldn't complete the sentence.

- But...? - he said.

- Hello, but what, can you answer? - He asked, upset.

- Did something happen? - he added desperately.

Valentina had an accident, she is hospitalized. - I managed to respond.

- Was that it, did she ask you to call me? - he answered.

If you come, I'll explain - I said, trying to get him to come to the hospital.

- Pass me the address - he answered reluctantly.

I dictated the address and after a while he arrived.

When I saw Eros I was stunned, it was him; I didn't know Valentina had such good taste.

I returned from my thoughts and told him what had happened to Valentina.

After that, I decided to go home and leave Eros with Valentina and her mother.

On the way home all I could think about was that Eros looked familiar, maybe I had seen him somewhere or maybe I would have seen him in college.

Eros' face looked so familiar... I wished I knew where I had seen him.

I came home.

I greeted my mom and told her what had happened.

- Did it sound familiar? - my mother asked.

Yes, but in a strange way... -I said with a head down.

- What do you mean? - asked my mother, intrigued.

Well... his name is Eros. - I said.

- Now I understand... but... was it him? - said my mother.

No... he has blond hair, although his eyes are the color of honey... - I said.

Not him, it would be strange to meet him right now and have him be the only person who remembers Valentina, don't you think? - I added.

- It could be, but life always gives you surprises and sometimes the unexpected can happen - concluded my mother, leaving me with great confusion and intrigue.

"Is he my great love who forgot about me despite the promise we made, I refuse to think that it is him!"

With that, the night came.

I went to the balcony of my room and began to see the stars, those I used to see with him.

"Where are you my love? Why haven't I found you yet?"

"There is not a single day that I do not suffer, cry or think of you, I miss you so much"

People think they know me, that they know everything about me but, they don't realize that I hide everything behind a smile that I have struggled to put on my face ever since.

Nobody understands the pain felt after losing someone who loves himself, but not in the way of thinking, as it is the case of death; but that person is alive, and in life he forgets you, that he loses the essence that characterizes him, that his memories go and disappear together with an accident, that your own being does not allow you to remember anything, and on top of that, that person flees from that life he had.

Waking up every day with an empty heart, a lump in my throat and eyes swollen from crying is not something I would wish on someone, that's why I hide it and try to give others a great day, the best one possible.

I hope that at this moment you are seeing the same star as me and that you can remember our escapes in the camp to see the sky, or when we each went to the balcony of our room while we talked on our cell phones about how beautiful it was to have something of ours, both of us.

I miss those dinners at your house or mine, when your mom would make roast beef chips, or when my mom and I would make blackberry pie, I remember it was your favorite, will it still be?

Why did I have to meet someone who also has your name?

Sometimes I wish I could forget you and not think about you anymore, but my heart won't let me.

That's how my days were spent, trying to prevent your name from coming up in any conversation with Valentina, after she was discharged.

One day coming out of an exam, I remember that she was in a hurry to leave, I wanted to keep her to tell me about Eros, with the excuse of comparing answers but, it was in vain, she had already gotten lost in the crowd.

When I left the university to go to my car, I saw them... they were happily talking, he pulled his hair aside and it was at that moment that I knew.

It was he... my love.

I recognized him by the mark on his right hand, the scar he made on his ring finger when he helped me put up a sign in one of the cabins at the camp, a cut so bad they had to put stitches in his finger.

I couldn't believe what was happening to me, it was him, he was here, where I study, but... with Valentina.

At that moment my heart was shattered, but there was nothing I could do, he didn't recognize me when he saw me in the hospital, much less now.

I saved everything I felt that moment and went to my car; when I entered I broke down in tears, as expected.

I dried my tears and started the car.

I drove home and hugged my mom as I entered.

- What happened? - she asked in dismay.

It's him - I said in tears.

- Him? - she asked confusedly.

Eros! It's the same Eros as Valentina - I said crying louder.

- Did you say something to him? - she said, still dismayed by the situation.

What was I supposed to tell her? Hello, I'm Antonella and I was your girlfriend until the moment you got into an accident, lost your memory and decided to run away? - I said increasing the crying.

After talking to my mother and venting about what I saw and heard, I went up to my room to lie down on my bed, I couldn't stop thinking about everything, I wanted to keep crying but my body wouldn't let up.

(Knocking on the door)

- Can I come in? - said the voice behind the door.

Yes... - I said, head down on the pillow as my snot sounded.

- How are you? Mom told me everything - said Emily, my older sister.

How do you think? - I said without taking my face off the pillow.

- With a broken heart, you're too young to go through all this by yourself - she said, patting my back.

I felt Emily look up at the ceiling as she said:

"If Eros was really deeply in love with you, he will remember you..."

"I don't think I'd be so stupid not to remember the person who made her heart beat so hard and intense"

"I trust that as soon as he starts talking to you, he'll start remembering"

Those were his words of encouragement.

For a moment I felt that there was a light at the end of the dark tunnel.

But... should I have interfered with what he and Valentina had?

Valentina feels safe with him, I even know that it is good for her to be with him, that she is falling in love with him, I don't know if I can bear the fact of seeing them like that, but I cannot take away Valentina's chance to fall in love, to remember; and much less can I interfere in the new life that Eros has formed after his accident.

I must get away from them.

God, help me to forget what I feel, about him.

Help me to overcome this.

I want to leave the city.

I want to know if he is curious about who he was before the accident.

I think I'll go visit my grandparents and some friends I have in L.A., it will help me clear my head this vacation.