Home Sweet Home

Alfred:

"I give up," I say, throwing down my pencil. No matter what I do or how hard I tried, I can't stop drawing a gas station. The ghostly outline of an abandoned gas station is permanently drawn onto my paper.

I sigh as I rub my forehead and lean back.

"I need a snack," I tell the ceiling of my and Matt's room. Getting up from my chair, I walk out of my room and down the stairs. Heading straight for the kitchen, I search the cabinets and the fridge for anything to snack on. However, as I look at the trash can, I'm reminded of my binge eating.

Over the top and falling out of the kitchen's trash can are empty candy wrappers, empty Cup Noodles cups, and empty cereal boxes. All of which are only from three days ago.

"Ahh," I say, slamming my hand over my face and dragging it down. "No wonder why I can't find anything to eat."

I think about going to a nearby store to buy some quick snacks, maybe a bag of chips and some hotdogs, but with Matt at work and Alieen volunteering, our two cars are already gone.

I sigh once more and shake my head. With no snacks or even juice available, I settle for a big cup of milk. Opening the fridge and grabbing the milk, I pour myself a cup before throwing away the empty container. Sitting at the counter, I slowly drink the last of the milk.

As I sit there alone in the kitchen, drinking a cup of milk, I can't help but think about Alieen.

"Alieen. What were you thinking? Why did you just leave A like that? I mean, yeah, we gave him some food and clothes, but still. We just left him. We just left him alone. And after all that talk of wanting to help him. I'm surprised A hadn't come to come us."

As I think this, I hear knocking coming from the front door.

"What the hell? Aww, man. Is A reading minds again? I thought I told him mind reading is very rude."

Running to the front door, I swing it open, expecting to see A. Only, it's not A standing there.

Leia:

"Hey Alfred," I say, nodding to my old friend.

Upon seeing me, Alfred's eyes go wide like in one of those old cartoons. His mouth hangs open and he stands completely still.

I clear my throat as I give Alfred a few minutes.

"Oh fly," I say, noticing a tiny fly flying near Alfred. "You might want to be careful--Nevermind."

Before I could finish, the fly flew right into Alfred's mouth. It seems the fly manages to snap Alfred out of his stance, however. As the fly lands on Alfred's tongue, Alfred closes his mouth and swallows. He then starts to cough while stumbling.

"Alfred," I say, rushing forward to grab Alfred. Patting his back, I decide to give Alfred a few more minutes.

"Did--Did I just eat a fly," Alfred asks.

"Uhh, no," I answer. "No."

Alfred looks at me before straightening himself up. He hits his chest a few times, coughs, and then looks back at me.

"Leia," Alfred says, "You're here."

"Yeah," I say, looking away. "I am. Is Alieen here, by chance?"

"No. She's at the pet shelter."

I breathe a sigh of relief.

"Uhh, can I come in?"

"Yeah," Alfred says, stepping to the side. "You don't really have to ask. This is your home too. I mean, as long as you pay your share of the rent."

"Home," I repeat. "This is my home too. Is it?"

I push the thought away and focus.

"I need to focus," I tell myself.

"Leia," Alfred says after letting me in. He steps forth and hugs me. Surprised by this at first, it felt strangely comfortable. I hug Alfred back. We stay like this for a few seconds before Alfred suddenly pulls back.

"Wait! No! I'm mad at you! So is Matt! And I think Alieen is too but don't quote me on that."

"Oh believe," I say, looking at the floor. "I know Alieen is mad at me."

"Leia," Alfred says with spread-out arms. "Oh my god! Where have you been? We have been worrying non-stop about you for days now! We're on the verge of filing a missing person report!"

"No need," I say. "I'm not missing! I'm standing right here."

"But for how long," Alfred asks. He pulls his arms in and crosses them. "I can't help but get the feeling this is a visit. Not a return."

"I'm sorry but you're right, Alfred. This is a visit. I can't stay here anymore."

"Well fine there. Grab your stuff and leave."

"You're," I say, stopping to take in a few deep breaths. "You're not going to stop me. You're not going to even ask."

"Leia," Alfred says with such a low voice, I can barely hear him. "What do you want? What is it you want? Do you want to go? Do you want to stay? Seriously, what is it you want?"

"I want to stay," I shout without realizing it. As soon as I hear those words, as soon as I shout them, I immediately feel something. I feel movement in my chest. I hear something beating in my chest.

"I want to stay," I repeat. Slowly, very slowly, I hold my hand over my chest. "I want to stay."

As I repeat the words over and over again, I feel something like a jump in the beating. With each jump, I see myself re-living an old memory

I see myself in the living room, watching everything from cheesy, horror movies to heart-felt, romantic movies with Matt.

"I'm telling you all of this, right now," Matt said while the four of us were watching Alien. "I am never, ever going into space! At least, not deep space. Mar? Yes. Jupiter? Yes. Saturn? Maybe. Pluto? No! Pass Pluto? Hell no!"

I move from that memory to another memory. In this memory, I see myself sitting with Alfred. We're sitting at the kitchen counter. I'm eating spaghetti and meatballs right out of the package while Alfred is trying to design a mall for class.

"Okay, okay," Alfred said, slamming his pencil down. "What about this? How is this?"

Alfred shows me a drawing of a mall. As expected, there are dozens of stores along with a few escalators and one elevator.

"Not bad," I said, looking at the drawing. However, as I examined the drawing, I can't help but notice something is off. "Wait, what's that? Is that a swimming pool?"

"Yeah," Alfred answered. "Why? What's wrong with a swimming pool inside a mall?"

I take a few minutes to carefully answered Alfred.

"There's nothing wrong with a swimming pool inside a mall," I start, "But do you really think it would be okay to have it right next to the escalators? Think about it. Wet, slippery feet on a moving escalator?"

Alfred turned his drawing over and examined it. He sighs a few minutes later before erasing the whole thing.

"You want my spaghetti and meatballs," I asked. I pulled down my fork and slide it toward Alfred.

"Thank you," Alfred said, taking my dinner. He re-drew his mall while chewing on long pasta strings. That memory ends and a new one starts. This time, it's with Alieen.

This memory of Alieen wasn't in the apartment. It was us at a thrift store. We were shopping for new clothes.

"Are you sure this is where you want to shop," I ask, watching as Alieen goes through a rack of used shirts. "Aren't these all used?"

"Leia," Alieen says, smiling. "Let's face it. You and I are not rich, and we lived in an expensive city."

"Okay," I say. "Thank you for the strange reminder. What's your point?"

"My point is," Alieen says, stopping and pulling out a dark-blue hoodie. She places the hoodie on her chest and smiles. "It's not about the money. It's about who you spend it with. Hey, what do you think?"

Alieen lined the sleeves of the hoodie along her arms.

"Not bad, right?"

I chuckle as I push past Alieen and grab my own jacket. Exactly like her, I place the jacket on my chest and line my arm up with the sleeves.

"No," Alieen says, shaking her head. "Absolutely not."

I look down at the jacket. The jacket is covered in golden flakes. It's sprinkling and shiny.

"Okay," I say, putting the jacket back. "Yeah, too flashy."

We both laughed and go back to shopping for some new clothes.

"I want to stay," I repeat. I stop repeating the words when I hear someone claps their hands. Looking up, I see Alfred with his hands in the air.

"Leia," Alfred says, lowering his hand. "Hello? Did you forget about me?"

"No," I say, feeling something starts to pour out of me. I wipe my eyes as water falls out of them. "No. I didn't forget about you. I can never forget about you or Matt or Alieen. Or Diana or Drew or even Ian, and you know I hate Ian!"

"Ian apologized for what he did," Alfred says. "And he even brought you a new bed. You have to stop being mad at him."

I shake my head and put up my hand.

"Listen, Alfred, I have to go"

"Of course you have."

Alfred said this with a roll of his eyes. I roll my own eyes before slapping him across the face.

"Ouch," he screams "What was that for?"

"I have to go," I repeat, "But I will come back. After all, this is my home, and I want to stay. Listen, please don't tell Matt or Alieen about this. Okay? Promise me you won't."

I grab Alfred's shoulders and shake him.

"I got it," Alfred yells. "I got it! I won't tell Matt or Alieen! Stop shaking me!"

"Thank you," I say. I wipe my eyes again as, for some reason, more water falls out. I let go of the shoulders and give Alfred another hug. I let him go before turning and running down the stairs. Once on the sidewalk, I run down the street until I'm sure Alfred can't see me anymore. With that, I use my power to fly into the bright air.

"A, I might be getting ahead of myself, and there's no way Jacob will approve of this but it's time you learned the truth."