ONCE UPON A DREAM (OR NIGHTMARE)
ONCE UPON A DREAM (OR NIGHTMARE)
I felt myself hesitate. I was about to meet my Mate for the first time and I was wearing pink flannel pajamas? The realization made me stop in my tracks. I can't meet Bell in these! He'd think I was a pup! (Which I was, but that was besides the point.) I already made this mistake once and he always treated me like a puppy. The thought of this made me very unhappy. If I knew I was about to have my shifting dream, I'd braid my hair, wear makeup, and definitely wear the nice silk button up pajamas to bed tonight! I mean, it wasn't comfortable like the one I was wearing, but the silly girl Lala would wear heels instead of sneakers just because its "so cute."
Maybe I shouldn't keep calling Lala a silly girl, since I was just a dumb pup myself. At least she knew how to dress to meet your soul mate for the first time in a mating dream. Like she even thought to still wear PJs. I mean, I would have worn my gym gear, but that would look unnatural, or my soul mate might think I wore tracksuits to bed - which was unfeminine and unluna-like. Sigh. Its hard being a luna.
So here I was, standing in the middle of the forest. I knew I should be running, but what should I do about my outfit?
OMG, I had to be the only she-wolf in the world who ended up stranded in the forest because I was worried about my clothes! I had never, not even once, heard a shifting dream where the she-wolf stopped and worried about her outfit. At least I had clothes on, it could be worse. But it was babyish clothes, so it was only better in terms of modesty. It was pretty much worse in every other way.
I still remembered meeting Bell in my dream. He was in the fight cages then, so he had appeared in tight black leather pants. Not the most respectable choice of outfit, but at least he looked cool.
I was really nervous and a bunch of other things. I wanted so much to take a peek at Bell. I hadn't seen him for what felt like ages! I wondered what he looked like in this life. I wondered what he was busy with. I wondered if he was happier.
At the same time, I was terrified. Mostly because I felt sure he would look down on my childish PJs and treat me like a puppy forever. What if he didn't recognize me? Wait, of course he wouldn't, we were still as good as strangers. What if he didn't like me? WHAT IF HE REJECTED ME?
If I were the type of girl who hyperventilated, I would.
WHAT IF HE REJECTED ME? I'm not sure why, but the moment this possibility hit me, I was sure there was no way I could continue running towards the end of this dream.
"I would rather I never met him." This thought struck me quite out of the blue. I completely forgot to breathe when it came to me, and then I immediately felt guilty because I was tempted.
I was probably over-reacting. I noticed I've been doing this since becoming Lala. I don't know where I caught that bad habit from… but it was better than running in headfirst without a second thought. I guess Lala would have really hated to be Sam too. Lala would have totally stressed out in my Original Timeline. She'd be totally useless and spend all her time crying for help, but she'd also be better dressed and much more ladylike.
If we put our pros and cons on a scale, I think it would be obvious that LALA WAS WEAK! (Sorry girl). I might be dumb, but at least I'm strong! (Yes, I realize while I'm writing this that it was a seriously dumba** thing to think, but it was my honest thought.)
Anyway, I wasn't going to let my outfit or even possible rejection faze me… okay, it did faze me, but only momentarily. I was Sam and I always had my own way of dealing with my insecurities - I march right up to it and punch it in the face. Either that, or I sneak round back and check Bell out without being seen. (Who's the dumb pup now?)
In fact, since it was obvious that this was going to be just another one of those cookie cut out shifting dreams she-wolves get before their first shift, it was a no-brainer. All I had to do was to run over to the lake, and then drop back behind the trees, flank the open area and wait for my soul mate to step out into the clearing.
I just wanted to take a little look at Bell. I just wanted to see what he was wearing when he wasn't in a fight cage. I just wanted to see with my own eyes that he was alive and well. In this timeline, he wouldn't be tattooed with those black discs from the vampire cages, he wouldn't be covered in blood like my first dreams of him, and he would have both his arms.
He probably wouldn't be the Tyger King, or the Master of the Ciara Coven, but you win some and you lose some. Dad said he had a white cat that could time travel too. Now that I thought about it, wasn't it dangerous to give Bell something like that? Goddess, not that I want to be critical of you, but you really need take better care of your pets. Especially since they came with dangerous powers.
Mate! ~ ❤️
Now that I didn't have to worry about my outfit, the thought of seeing Bell again put a spring into my steps. I ran through the forest till I came to a clearing with a lake. Here we are, exactly as expected. Dropping back behind the tree line, I moved carefully. Since this was Bell we were talking about, I knew any careless slip would give me away in a heartbeat.
I would have climbed up a tree, but coniferous trees didn't have the easiest branches to get up onto, so I found a good thick tree to wait by. From here, I would be able to see Bell stepping out into the clearing without being in his direct line of sight. Here's assuming he steps out looking at the lake and not the dark trees on the side.
The lake was beautiful and even though it wasn't the first time I've seen it, I was still surprised by how wide it looked, and how flat, and how the whole night sky seemed to be reflected on its surface.
Just looking at it made me feel like something of great import to my life would happen right at this moment, something amazing, something life-changing, something that would shake me to the core and take away my heart forever.
Which was probably the feeling a she-wolf was supposed to feel when she approached the lake. I think only a dumb pup like me would have been worrying about finding a merman in the lake, or a salamander for that matter.
In the dark of the night, year after year, across the centuries, since the very first wolves… a she-wolf would come of age, and just before her first shift, she would have a dream where she was running in the forest, and just like how she would be running in her usual day to day life, she would run to a moment where she meets her soul mate for the first time.
Or she would be running in her wolf form, and see her own reflection. Or meet her soul mate in his wolf form… those happened just as frequently.
Or she would be running and there would be blood and fire everywhere. This one would be a bad sign but it was very rare.
I really just wanted to see Bell alive and well. I wanted to know if this timeline treated him better. If he were happier… I would stay for him.
A low growl from behind me made me jump out of my skin. I spun around quite by reflex to face…
"It's you."
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AUTHOR'S NOTE:
Who did Sam see in her dream? Who do you want it to be?
You're not allowed to answer "All of the above!" Lol.
TBH, I'm still torn although I'm leaning towards … (I won't tell you. Haha.)
Find out on Monday! Have a great week!