Chapter 24

Deku stayed over for dinner later, then he vanished into the night with a sarcastic salute. And guess fucking what, the only thing on my mind after he left was him. Like, the whole fucking time.

Why had he assumed I had something to tell him? What was the 'bigger image' he had been talking about? Why did his absence upset me so fucking much? Why did I miss him? Why had I wanted to k-

Stop. No, hold the fuck on. Where the hell was my train of thoughts dragging me? That was not how I had started off. I was digressing in a direction I didn't like at all. Or a little too much. I grabbed my pillow and shoved it over my head.

…

If I added what I had almost thought just now to everything I'd thought the last days…

Somebody kill me.

If you're even denser than I obviously fucking was, here's the damn explanation:

I had to realize that I kinda maybe really fucking liked Deku a tiny huge fucking bit too much. THAT I EVEN LIKED HIM AT ALL WAS ALREADY FUCKING UNACCEPTABLE. Oh wait, the 'I fucking hate Deku' attitude should be the past by now.

Nah, I'd rather hate Deku than… than…

I just turned onto my other side and more or less forced myself to sleep.

I'd rather not get attached to this psychopath.

I was too fucking late.

-/-

The next morning hit me like a golf club into the fucking balls.

Mostly because Deku was the first thing I saw. And I wasn't dreaming. "Morning Kacchan! I barely slept, I fell out of my bed and for some reason, my hands and back are sore. In summary, I'm extremely pissed off and will skin your ass if you breathe my direction."

I blinked a few times, not knowing how to react to this bad excuse for a greeting. Then I remembered my late night realization and quickly averted my eyes from Deku. "What the fuck, Deku. Do I need to make you sleep again?" He dropped down next to me.

"No. Just let me take my bad mood out on you and noone gets hurt. In out of you, at least." Dekus satisfied grin opposed his danger emitting tone. I smirked lightly. "Someone should introduce you to that aggression disorder therapist my old hag once dragged me to."

Deku raised his eyebrows. "What happened that it was only once? Pretty sure you'd need at least infinite counselings." I almost laughed at the memory. "I can't really explain it, but that little shit was crying when I left and I was even more pissed than before." Deku snorted. "Can't take you, can't take me."

I stared at his amused expression, my thoughts already trailing down the path I tried preventing them from going. Dekus calloused voice made me surface again. "Kacchan? Would you not stare at me like that? At least not until you've explained why." I lightly shook my head. "Huh?"

Deku dismissively stared up to me. "You're staring at me like you want to eat me. It's quite amusing, to be honest." I rubbed my eyes. "Then be amused, I guess." Then I stood up to get some clothes and shower. I heard a sniffing noise and Deku snickering.

"Your bed smells like caramel. Why do you smell like caramel?" I shot a quick glare over my shoulder and saw Deku hugging my pillow like a child. I quickly faced my drawer again, because I felt my cheeks burning up like an oven. What the fuck.

"It's my quirk. My sweat contains glycerin and that shit is used to make caramel." I turned back to Deku. His smile made me shiver. "Then… do you taste like caramel aswell?" "Haah?! I don't fucking know! I don't run around licking my palms all day!" I felt my palms starting to crackle and quickly clenched my fists to suppress the explosions.

Deku laughed. "Calm down, I was just teasing you. Maybe." I furrowed my eyebrows. "Right then, ragamuffin. I'm gonna go shower, but don't you fucking take that as an invitation to find out." Having said that, I vanished into the bathroom and slammed the door shut behind me.

When I left the bathroom, Deku was still sitting on my bed, staring off into space. I went over to him and snapped my fingers in front of his eyes. "Ground Control to Major Tom, you still there?" Before I could react, Deku had caught my wrist. "Major Tom to Ground Control, I feel like you need a thrashing again."

He sighed and let go of me as soon as he saw my frightened expression. "I was having an extremely pleasant daydream." Dekus bratty tone made me expect the worst, but nothing came. He just stared up to me with a blurry glare. I stared back with a similarly lost expression.

"So you want to hit me?" My voice was barely audible and raspier than normal. Deku chuckled. "Don't I always?" I shrugged. How would I know what was going on in his head? Deku was more than unpredictable. I slammed my hands down on my bed and shoved my face into his.

"If you want to hurt me fucking bad you need to mention it every day, why don't you do it already, dammit?! If I recall it correctly, you haven't given me more than a few scratches since you tried butchering me the other week. Your intimidation is fucking fading." I straightened back up after finishing.

Deku crossed his legs and laughed quietly. "I though once was enough. And anyways, no organism will endure daily torture for long. You still serve a couple purposes, so I need to keep you alive." I growled. "What am I to you, cattle?! Get a fucking hold of yourself!"

He dropped his head to the side. "What's up with you lately, Kacchan? I mean, it makes me feel better about myself when you ask for it, but since when did you want to get hurt? That's not like you and I want you, not something that looks like you."

Although Deku was sitting lower than me, it felt like I was the one being looked down at. "Come on, Kacchan. Tell me the truth."