Fucked Up

This day sucks. That was all what I could say. Everbody told me to think positive. Everybody told me not to lose hope. Everybody told me everything is going to be fine. 

Bullshit! 

It was a fucked up day! I did that what they told me. To take a walk, to refresh my mind in the cold breeze. I just had to stay at home like my guts had told me to. But the good me always obeys what the others say. And now... Now I'm getting kidnapped by a tall man with a unicorn mask in the middle of the streets.

"Get off me!", I yelled as the bald-headed man with small different tattos on his face handcuffed me after he teared away the bag from my head. "Help me! Someone help! Anybody please help me!", I screamed at the top of my lungs and the tears threatened to fall.

As the metal started to sting my handwrist, I knew I was in big trouble. The dark unfamiliar building which smelled burned and abadoned, got me paralizied and weak. I couldn't see much but after my eyes adjusted the darkness I saw nothing but a weird laboratory. With the situation I got scared.

He pushed me against the table and stooped my body forwards, so that my back faced him. After he ducktaped my mouth he buckled up his belt and slid the zipper from his jeans open, pushing his waist towards me.

I could feel his little bump through my trousers. I squeezed my legs tight together but with the help of his feet he could force my legs to spread open, rip my trousers with his butterfly in his right hand then he pushed his dick deep inside of me. I let out a hurtfull gasp and while he thrusted in me the deeper he got. I tried to get out of the cold metalic handcuffs. It hurt a lot but not more than the rape the tall gross stranger was doing with me.

It frightened me when he moaned. 

How could he even like that? 

Should I understand what the meaning of rape is?

As I escaped my hands from the handcuffs, I turned around and punched him with force in the face. He stumbled backwards in the chemicals behind him and those mixture crashed on to the ground. Due the chemical reaction the liquids started to haze. The raper got back on his feet and pulled his trousers up, anger written all over his face. If looks could kill, I definately died seconds ago.

I teared the ducktape away from my mouth thus I could breath better. It burned a little but at least I inhaled more oxygen for my lungs. As I pulled up my trousers, I smelled a few drugs and other sour chemicals. Filled with rage, the man walked towards me, I stepped backwards as far as I could untill the cold dusty wall hit my back. His right hand approached my throat. His grip, strong enough to lift me up and pressed me against the dirty wall. I gasped for air but my throat felt more sore the more I struggled to breathe. My lungs collapsed not long after I tried to get away from him

I heard a big roar, just like a lion. My sight got darker and before I completely blacked out I heard and felt the explosion.

From the bad dream which I couldn't remember anymore, I woke up yelling.

I heard a silent beeping sound that went slower within every second I calmed myself down. My head stung and pounded really hard. Since I saw only the blurriness, I couldn't recognize well where the hell I was. But assuming the smell and those noises, I laid in a hospital.

"Hello mrs. Dark.", a deep voice said out of nothing which made me jump a little. Leashed onto the bed I noticed it, since I couldn't move the way I wanted to. I struggled a little, trying to get out, it made me inscecure. The monitoring showed the incrase of my hearbeat.

"Why am I tied up on the bed? What the hell happened?", I whispered as I looked down to my hands.  My vision got less blurry and I saw a few bruises on my wrists. Hematomas painted my arms blue and purple. Even though I didn't touch them, it hurt already just by looking at those.

"Mrs. Dark, I'm detective Danny Loomer. I know, you must be anxious, having a lot of questions too. Ma'am, we assume you were involved into some big trouble. Someone found you next to a exploded illegal drug laboratory. The medical staff ran some blood tests on you. They said you have an amount of drugs in your blood and you're lucky you didn't die because of an overdose. According to an unkown eyewitness, the man who dragged you in there injected you something. So we believe you're a victim. We put on the handcuffs for your own safety. I will unlock them after the doctor gives me the okay for it. I guess you were at the wrong place at the wrong time and you were lucky enough that you got saved by our only hero in this country.", he explained as he looked deep into my eyes.

I too stared into his light blue eyes. His eyes stung out with his pale face and his messy brown hair. It kinda hypnotized me and made me forget the hospital atmosphere for a moment. He wore the typically black suit like all the detectives wear. It suited him really well and he looked quite sympatico.

"Sir, am I in danger?", I questioned, unsure what was going on. All of the sudden, my heart started to race, my lungs filled with dry air, my whole body started to burn and the pulse monitor started to beep faster than before. He leaned forward, shifted his weight on his elbows then on his knees. By the look in his eyes, he looked worried.

"Nancy... Honestly we are still unsure about that. That's why we wanted to ask you some questions from last night for this case.", he answered after he cleared his throat.

In the meantime the monitor showed how my pulse raced incredible fast, I started to stutter: "I, I- uh nee- need a cigarette. Let me go! I need to get out of here. Let me go!", I started to lose a grip of these stupid handcuffs but failed horribly. I tried to get up but got angry because I couldn't. I clenched my fists tight toghether as the tears wanted to drop. My throat began to swell up and I had difficulties to breathe. The detective noticed me panicking and reached out for my hand. Before he could even open his thin lips to let some words out, I've lost it: "Don't you even dare to fucking touch me!" 

I got very angry that I somehow managed to break the chain from my left wrist. Of course in that momet my monitor send out a silent emergency alarm. I panicked. Two doctors in white coats and four nurses in green scrubs rushed into my room.

"Her pulse increased, sedate her!", the older doctor commanded and all of them stressed out. The dective stepped aside and observed everything whilst one of the nurses prepared the injection. One of them handed it to the doctor as the other one started to prepare some other medical stuff for me. "Try to keep her still.", he then demanded and the nurses stopped from doing what they were doing and then pushed me back to bed.

"I told you to not to fucking touch me ever again!", I said in a very threatening voice and tried to push the nurses away. When the doctor was almost close enough to insert the needle, I grabbed his arm with my only free hand, squeezed it together untill he let go of it. After the detective had enough from watching, he intervened. His big hands touched my arms pushing them into the white bedsheets. He was stronger than the four nurses and the doctors together. With his help they could finally inject the sedative. 

It didn't took too long untill I felt dizzy and tired.  It helped me to calm down honestly. To muzzy, I could hear them mumble something to each other.  Without wanting I shut my eyes close and entered the darkness.

I woke up screaming without even remembering what I dreamt about. This time, soaked wet from of the cold sweat. I tried to calm down but when you are sobbing it's harder than it looks like. In the corner I saw a tall shadow standing. It made me shiver because I somehow can't remember about a thing. And that shadow didn't look friendly at all, more likely a locked person. After realizing that this didn't look like my room at all, I got a little nervous. It wasn't a hospital either.

"They didn't treat you right.", the shadow chimed in a very low voice and took a step forward to the dimmed light. He wore a camouflaged suit. It was suit tight that it emphesized his muscles. The black bandana underneath the suit's hood covered his eyes. On his left chest and on the belt was a dark blue mixed with purple logo printed on it. It seemed to be an outline of an animal but it was to small for me to identify. The whole clothing he wore looked like he was an assasin or something similar. "I won't do any harm. I got you out of the hospital. The detective just thought you'de be in less danger here. He will bring you your clothes and probably ask you some questions about the other night. Try to relax mrs. Dark. Have a goood night.", he said, before I could even say something he jumped out of the window and disappeared in the night.

I tried to get up onto my feet instead I stumbled and fell hard on the wooden ground. I let out a small paniful groan as I landed on the hard floor. As I tried to get up I wanted to hold on the table but the table cracked and the vase fell down, splittered all over the place when it hit the floor. My knees felt weak as my head started to hurt. My vision got blurry and all I wanted was to scream. Scream out from the top of my lungs to stop the pain. In preferance I started to sob. I had a huge pain in my whole body. Before I could even get down on my knees a strong grip catched me.

"Don't worry Nancy. I got you.", he said and picked me up bridal style.

I got stuck already in a small panik bubble after I woke up in an unkown room wihtout any memory. The man picking me up made the bubble even grow bigger.

"Don't call me Nancy. I don't know you. Now let me down.", I demanded, tears dropping down my cheeks from fear. My tiny arms trying to push the man in suit away but he was so much stronger than me. He softly laid me down back to the comfortable bed. Unsure how I should react because of a stranger being nice to me, I just remained silent.

"My apologies mrs. Dark. I thought it would be easier for you to talk to me if we are intellectually.", he apologized as he walked back to the door. His shadow reminded me of the person before which made me really uncomfortable and at the same time also cozzy. Not thinking to much of it I shrugged it off. "You should get some rest. You had a rough day. I put all your belongings that we had found, and don't need it for evidence anymore, on this armchair.", the guy added in a caring way.

"Who are you?", my voice sounded shaky not knowing what was happening. He narrowed his eyebrows, looking even more confused than before. He took slow steps towards the bed. He pointed with his finger next to me, asking me if he could take a seat on my left. I agreed with a slight nod, his soft blue eyes hypnotizing me. Somehow I had a dejà vu with his blue eyes.

"I'm Danny Loomer, the detective you met in hospital earlier.", he told me in a comforting way, even though what he was saying wasn't comforting at all if I can't remember about a thing. I guess he could see how I felt with all the confusion written all over my and his face. "Do you remember anything from last night, mrs. Dark?", he asked sceptical.

I just shook my head as response. He let out a deep sigh and turned on the light from the night side. The light of the red bedsidelamp blinded me a little but at least I saw that I was in a very comfortable room. It was decorated oddly, somehow a little oldschool.

"How are you feeling, mrs. Dark?", he asked me a total different question as he got up and covered me with the white blanket. I tensed up a little bit not feeling well with him doing that. He is still a stranger for me at all and who knows if he really is working together with the police. But that one soft touch of his, I felt a strange burn, like a good kind of burn and somehow I also felt safe around him.

"A little taken aback, I guess.", I answered his last question, looking down to my hands when all of the sudden I felt a sharp pain shooting through my brain after I saw the bruises on my wrists. I let out a muffled scream and tried to hold back the new tears. "What happened to me?", I whispered more likely to myself but he still must have heard it.  I saw the sorrow in his eyes and it made me sick. I didn't want him to see me in a weak way.

"You should probably try to get some sleep. It was a long day for you mrs. Dark. I can tell you everything tomorrow after my middle shift. If you need anything, there is a bell.", he pointed to it and continued: "When I'm not around, downstairs is a kitchen. I can prepare you some breakfast and store it in the fridge. If you got any questions or something else you will find some telephones with some number written on the note beside them."

Before he could leave, I grabbed him by his wrist making him stop. "Detective... I know we don't really know each other. But I'm scared. Really, really scared. Can you please stay in the room for the night? In case of an emergeny.", I asked my hands trembling from fear. "I think I can arrange something like that for this one night. I just need to figure out where the spare mattress is.", he assured, taking of his suits jacket and hung it up in the empty warderobe.

"If you don't have a clue where it is then just leave it, nevermind. Just promise me nothing will happen tonight.", I half whispered. He nodded in agreement as he picked up his jacket again and walked to the door. When he stopped, he hesistated for a second before he turned around to face me.

"I promise, this safehouse is totally secure. Night Nancy.", he promised and by leaving my room he turned off the yellowish lights.

Plopping down with my head on the pillow I closed my eyes. Feeling the pain in my body made it hard for me to fall asleep. Time to time the pain was getting stronger, making me whine in agony. Everytime a question popped up in my mind, my head wanted to explode or something was stabbing in my chest. Tossing around the bed I finally fell asleep.

Hearing a loud dullsound from the outside, made me jump up from my sleep. Something in my head told me to get up and look around the house. I don't know what got up in my mind, somehow I got the urge to snoop around even though I'm not the person for it. Something was strange, I felt like I'm different, not the person I was before anymore. I know it sounds weird because I can't remember who I was before. Earlier I couldn't barely walk and now I felt like the strongest person of the world and all I can think about is of revenge. Even though I don't know who or what happened. I just felt like I had to end this war.

As I reached the door I went out to the dark hallway. The stairs to get downstairs was on the otherside of the corridor across my room. Being downstairs in the living room, I had the urge to crack open the fruniture that was locked. Actually wanting to let go of that feeling, something inside me snapped. I hissed in pain, crashed down on to my knees and lost control over myself. I let out a fearful scream and wondered how the detective did not come look after me. He probably had an emergeny or something and was away.

I looked down to my trembling hands that now turned pale but my veins got into a darker shade of its normal blue. With all my power I had, I got up and looked to a mirror that hung across the couch. My actual brown eyes turned to an evil black clour even with the eyeskin. After seeing my pale body changing, my sight got darker and then I blacked out.