Chapter 19: Missing Puzzle Piece

Kaito typed in the passcode to his apartment and swung the door open, allowing Hikaru inside. Hikaru, who had a bad memory of this apartment, hesitated before entering after Kaito.

I couldn't blame him for hesitating, Hikaru's last memory of this place was me trying to force myself on him. I can understand why he'd be reluctant to come in, and I also know that it's entirely my fault.

"I'm sorry you had to come here, Hikaru. I would've given you some money for a hotel room if I trusted you'd be safe by yourself." I said, setting my phone down on the kitchen counter.

"I-it's alright, Kaito, I'm fine. I'll do what I have to in order to get my life back the way it once was without regrets." He said, setting down his bags in the living room.

I had taken Hikaru back to the hotel building where he was temporarily living before the incident, luckily his bags were behind the counter waiting to be retrieved. However, Hikaru had a disturbing look on his face when he took his bags, particularly the smaller one with a red sweater poking out from the zipper.

Did it mean something to him? Was it his roommate's sweater or something? I know I shouldn't ask, and I know if I did it would probably make things worse, but I'm dying to learn the answer. Then, maybe he'd finally open up to me again.

"Hikaru, I-" I stopped myself from asking, it was none if my business and it would be rude to bring it up in a place like this, "Nevermind, it's nothing."

Hikaru looked puzzled for a moment, then sat down on one of the barstools by the counter.

"Where's my room?" he asked as I took out a bag of frozen orange chicken from the freezer.

"Down the hall, second door on the left. It's the guest room, so there's no need to pull out the futon in the closet." I replied, digging through the drawer under the oven for my large baking pan.

"Thanks." Hikaru hopped off the stool, grabbed his bags, and hauled them off to the guest room.

I guess it was too awkward to be in here with my alone, I hope he's alright.

___ ___ ___

I flopped onto the large bed in my temporary room after dropping my bags on the floor by the closet. I liked the room, it had a nice black and white contrast with just a little bit of red and gray mixed in. I must say, it was a very neat room even for a man.

The bed was across from the door, it was a queen sized bed with a white duvet and a coal black wooden frame. A few small bookshelves were stacked to my right and on the left was the closet and guest bathroom as well as a small nightstand stained to match the bed frame.

A single silver chandelier hung in the center of the room and tied the modern aesthetic all together. This room had no windows, but the lamps gave off a natural light to make up for it.

Something about this room, despite its beauty, was missing. It wasn't just a feeling of emptiness, it was like an ominous black void in the center of the room that had swallowed everything around it. As long as that one thing wasn't there, the room was just a room and not a home where I could feel comfortable and relax. The missing piece in this puzzle of a guest bedroom.

There was a soft rapping on the wooden door leading to the hallway.

"Hey, Hikaru? I made some food, are you hungry?" Kaito asked through the door.

"I'll be out in a minute." I replied, rolling off the luxurious bed.

I arrived at the table, finding a large dinner laid out. Braised beef, rice, and a plate of homemade spring rolls accompanied by a glass of water.

"Smells good, did you make all this yourself?" I asked, sitting down across from him.

"Yeah, I did. When I was a teenager, my mother wasn't ever home so I stole her cookbook and practiced making some of the recipes in it. That's how I got through high school without collapsing from malnutrition." Kaito explained, I snickered at the last part.

"I take it you're used to being alone, my parents were the same way. I'm not sure how I survived high school, but I wouldn't be here if I hadn't." I said, immediately cursing under my breath for blurting out confidential information.

"Yeah, rich father, unfaithful mother, and a horrible half-sister that despises my very existence on this planet. On the outside we're a regular high-class family but nobody suspects a thing about what it's really like on the inside." Kaito said, picking up his chopsticks, "Thank you for the food."

"Thank you for the food." I said, taking my bowl of rice and beginning to eat.

We shared a long silence as we ate, both if us not daring to ask any questions we had floating around in our minds. It wasn't uncomfortable nor enjoyable, it was what I'd describe as a white silence. Like white noise but a silence shared between two people that has the same mind-clearing effect.

I returned to my room afterwards, leaving only the bedside lamp on as I stared blankly at the suitcase. OUR suitcase.

He had worn most of those clothes, I still hadn't washed them yet but for some reason I felt inclined to put them on. Part of me wanted to be closer to him, to know that he was still with me even though I had no idea how far away he really was. I knew it was a foolish thought, but for one night I'd like to be able to sleep with the same comfort he gave me when he wrapped his arms around me and filled my nostrils with the scent of the cherry blossom body wash I gave him that I never used.

Without thinking, I had opened the suitcase and pulled out the soft black t-shirt he wore to bed every night. I pulled off the shirt I was wearing and slipped the t-shirt over my head.

An overwhelming wave of comfort washed over me, his scent weaving it's way into my brain and helping me drift off into unconsciousness.

Maybe you were right, Kanoe. I'm not so sure I'm as straight as I once thought I was...