CHAPTER 48: Grandfather Clock

"Mom, my knees hurt." A said, looking up at the statue of the cross backlit by dark colors of red, blue, and yellow. Through the rays coming into the small church, A looked around at the dust floating in the light. Free to float around at its leisure. The sharp airy click of a grandfather clock was getting on his nerves. He wanted to stand up, to shake his legs out, to go home and do what he wanted to do. But here mom was, devotedly closing her eyes to some weird statue.

"Not until I'm done saying my prayer. Be quiet, Astraeus, hands locked and eyes closed. Don't you want Goddess to answer our prayer?"

"... But I want to go home. I'm hungry! I'm tired! Mom, let's go!" A said with a frown.

"Shush-shush! I'm almost done. Now, Mother, thank you for your grace and protection. I hope you find your way into A's heart, some day, too. In Maleadora's name, amen."

"Finally!" A's collapsed down, as one of his legs fell asleep. "Ah, it's all tingly-and-and- prickly! See! We should've gone a long time ago. This was so boring! What can she do, anyway?"

"Astraeus! That is no way to address our savior! Priestess Maleadora has been protecting her followers for thousands of years!"

"Oh yeah? Why hasn't Maleadora brought dad back."

"W-well, Goddess works in mysterious ways- I mean, her and Maleadora can't just give us everything we want, dear. We must struggle for Goddess's sake, not our own. That's when she will reward us. Could be tomorrow, could be next week, and definitely in heaven. Besides, dad is a very complicated man… We'll just have to keep praying!"

"...Ok… Should we pray about those land sharks you think are bastards?"

"Baby, don't say those words… The loan sharks-"

"But you say that stuff about them."

"Baby- ugh. Do what I say, not do what I do. It's time to go home." His mother's dress ruffled as she stood elegantly, her head just above the light raining down from the window. Extending a colored hand to Astraeus, they walked off. As they were about to leave, Astraeus looked back at that cross looming above all else with its divine superiority.

"Mom, what happens to bad guys? The ones who don't follow the rules?"

"They can either repent for their sins or suffer an eternity in hell. Remember, A. Do not take vengeance, for the Goddess repays all debts in full. She is almighty, unstoppable, all-knowing, and merciful. When you feel weak, worthless, and out of place, she'll welcome you with open arms. She is our protector and our avenger. Like a guardian angel, she is always by your side." Alea said soothingly, as Astraeus stared at the cross. Before, it was so still and lifeless. But now, he adored it. The Goddess, a hero to everyone who needed it. She ensured villains get their due process, and their due punishment. She was always there, everywhere. You were never alone. In this moment, Astraeus felt a connection with everything, like every being on the planet was but an extension of himself. Like an arm or a leg, able to move at his will so effortlessly. In this world, he was not nearly alone, he was but a small part of a vast beach of wills, thoughts, and aspirations. His hair stood on end, and his eyes glittered like gold and shone the color of royalty. Those eyes. Those violet eyes. Burning through her back, the violet eyes stared into her. She immediately turned around to see her son with those accursed eyes. The force of a slap whipped across A's face as he fell to the ground, tears forming in his eyes, which turned back to a dull brown. Astraeus looked in shock at his mother.

"Never do that again." She said, only wide, blood-struck eyes straining on him as her silhouette towered above him. What did he do? Was that feeling so wrong? Astreaus's tears fell down his cheeks. He could only feel ashamed of himself for letting go like that. It would never indulge himself in such behavior again. He hated it. This feeling. The lock around his mind and heart. He should never again feel that passionate, that sense of completion. Dangerous things happen when the violet eyes are dawned. That he would surely go to hell if he used them again. That night, Alea grabbed up Astraeus from his bedroom, and brought him to the couch.

"I'm sorry for earlier, baby. Here, how about we watch something. You can choose. Here's the remote." Awkwardly, A grabbed the remote from her hand. People's faces, boring titles. Wait, what was that? Its colors were so saturated, so… bountiful. The proportions of the characters were weird, in a beautiful, aesthetically pleasing way. He read the title. Fantasy. Another world. Adventure. Girls. He clicked, they watched as he got the best seat in the house, raised on her lap. He could get addicted to this.

Time passed, and the members of the small church came and went. He offered his conflictions, his devotions to Maleadora's cross. But he also grew lazy. What was the point of talking to people? Small talk about the weather and how things were going were all the same. The world, as he knew it, was boring and stupid. He turned to daydreaming to fix his imperfect life. He and his mother were poor. He had purposefully turned others away at school. They were unimportant in the grand scheme of things. School itself was horrible. Eight hours a day… for what? Absolutely nothing. He indulged himself in reading, manga, video games, and of course, anime. In these worlds, things were simple, and easy. There, things worked out nicely. Heroes could always bring themselves to do anything in the end, and they would always do it with a smile on their face or tears falling to the ground. Fantasizing about concepts was much easier than stepping out and struggling through the reality of it all. He was now in the middle of his teens when his life would turn upside down.

It was a cool day in autumn, the leaves on the trees boosted colors of saturated reds, oranges, yellows, and browns. Like fiery snow, they fell leaf by leaf from their mother trees, gliding, swaying down to the earth beneath it. There was beauty in this death. Humans got to see their magnificent colors, and the trees would awake once more to sprout new vibrant green buds in the spring. The old dead leaves would put nutrients in the soil, allowing for new life to flourish with its demise. But all trees, big or small, must eventually die. As the kid and his mother joined their hands and began to pray, the opening of the heavy wooden doors creaked and light spilled into the room from behind. Who was this guest? Service was already nearing its end. Astraeus remained focused, dedicated to his own thoughts. Their bond wasn't the same, neither was that a bad thing. She apologized, she was just… worried for him, after all. And traumatized of dad. She said he had those same violet eyes, with which he did many terrible things. The wind, from that door. The chill spread throughout the room. It felt so soothing, so livening from the dry heat of the indoors. But it soon turned to burning. What was this feeling? His eyes were not open, yet, a stare broke through the never-ending darkness of his eyelids. The eyes were calm yet heinous, and fear trickled both cold and hot like a rain of knives piercing through his skin. Only one set of eyes could be so powerful. He would not open his eyes. Was he really here, or was this just an illusion, a sick hallucination his mind thought up just to scare him? The breath escaped his mother's mouth as she let out a gasp before being cut off by either her hand or his. The voice came from inches in front of him, piercing into his mind as it spoke.

"You've grown quite well, Astraeus." A voice smooth and commanding enchanted his ears, but his nature fought its temptation. "Now, upon those gorgeous eyes of yours."

No. You will not get that pleasure. And get away from Mom.

That last thought struck through Veltos's being. His Child? Disobey him? He would not have that.

"Astraeus. Open your eyes or so help me I will gut everyone here. Including this woman." The gaze of his eyes fell off the boy and into the unknown darkness.

"I told you to raise him to be obedient, woman! Or are you too stupid to do that?" Veltos hummed impatiently.

"She has a name, you know." A male voice boomed with fury. His uncle. The violet eyes, like a searing onslaught, directed their gaze once more. He must be trembling right now.

"Know your place." Veltos' voice echoed as spatters could be heard and screaming rang in his ears. The thud of knees on hollow wood could be heard as Alea broke down. He could not see her. He wanted to see her. And then, from darkness, colors emerged. From the void of his eyelids, he could see a spiraling cloud of yellows and blues. Mom was breaking. If he opened his eyes, would he stop this madness?

"Astraeus. Open them."

"Vel-" The voice stopped abruptly as though Veltos himself caught her by the lips. The sound of shallow smacking from an angle above told that she was fighting being suspended off the ground by his hands.

"DON'T… call me Veltos. You do not deserve to say such a name anymore, woman. You're just a catalyst of experimentation I mated with for testing. Nothing more. You aren't even fit to be a concubine."

"I-" The grip on her released as the sound of a loud smack and popping bones could be heard as the colors of yellow anxiety and blue fear turned into deep violet anguish. Astraeus could barely stand. He was trying his best, just to stand still. To detach, separate, to cease his own inner thoughts.

With a kick to the side, she was launched into the cobblestone wall, spasming as she fell gasping. He rushed to her side, her eyes bloodshot and her body deformed as the lapis carpet of Maleadora's church turned violet from the bloodstains. Astraeus looked around him to see himself engulfed by the carnage. Uncles, aunts, grandparents, cousins, friends, acquaintances. Limbs, organs, intestines, jaws, and other unidentified meaty chunks. All gutted for one man's ignorance. His mother twisted around in pain coughing, blood seeping from the back of her head.

"Why? Why would you do this? Shouldn't you love her?"

"Why would I ever love this woman? She is not special. She is not particularly amazing. She has already birthed and raised you, so she has expired her purpose for living. She is no longer of any value to me. Just something I, unfortunately, gave my name to once, only for it to be used in vain like this."

"That's it? That's all you have to say?"

Astraeus' nails dug into his palm until blood ran down and dripped from his knuckle. His teeth bit through his lip as he stifled tears. He was scared. So scared. Of what this man might do. Will do. But he also wanted to rip this man's tongue from his mouth. His words, like his eyes, were poison. Scum. A degradation of everything he aspired to be. But the violet-eyed man did not yet get what he wanted. Astraeus was hiding his face from him. Astraeus was still thinking for himself. How selfish of him.

"Enough of these lies. I'll tear down this church, and your delusional fantasies. Hey, get over here. Stop being inconvenient, or I'll-"

"Shut up!" A's voice was rasp and uncontrolled. Tears and blood marked up his face. His silhouette was lined with the warm orange colors blooming from the stained window in front of him, the same authoritative cross looking down overhead, its symbol mighty and unchanged over millennia.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP. YOU'RE GOING TO HELL- DO YOU HONESTLY THINK YOU CAN GET AWAY WITH THIS- I HOPE YOU DIE PAINFULLY AND GO STRAIGHT TO HELL, YOU BASTARD. DON'T TOUCH MY MOTHER SHE IS MINE I LOVE HER YOU DON'T DESERVE HER. DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH SHE SUFFERED DOWN HERE WHILE YOU WERE PLAYING YOUR GAME OF GOD? AND WIPE THAT STUPID FUCKING GRIN I KNOW YOU HAVE PLASTERED ON YOUR FACE LIKE SOME FUCKING CLOWN. I HATE YOU. LEAVE US ALONE. GO FUCK UP SOMEBODY ELSE'S LIFE."

Astraeus held his mother's head as blood pooled into the palm of his hand. I'm sorry, mom. I can't do anything right. I slack all day and get bad grades. I don't want to look at my future because I'm scared about how bleak it will be. You tell me I'm smart, but I'm so stupid. I didn't do a goddamn thing for you. For us. If I just had more time, I could make amends, I could fix us. But you're going to die, and all I can do is sit here, like the asshole I've always been, giving up one last time. What's so easy about giving up? I never do a damn thing, but all I do is dream. I don't try to learn, but I want all the answers. I give a weak effort, then I call it quits. What is wrong with me? Seriously. How was I not offended by my own existence? How have I not been ashamed of what I was doing this whole time? I had so much time, hours, days, years. Where the hell did it all go? I don't remember what I was doing a week, a month, or a day ago. A lifetime of opportunity, wasted by my incompetence. I have half of that dickhead's brain, and yet I'm sitting here with nothing to do because I don't know anything. Please, Mom, don't die. Don't leave me alone.

The clicking of the old grandfather clock made the room feel even more empty than it was. Stop it. Stop that horrible noise. It hurts my ears. It stings and it mocks me. It's driving me absolutely mad. Her heartbeat, once like a deep calming bellow, now sounded labored and strained as it rushed to keep blood flowing. Faster and faster it crept, as Astreaus's face grew numb. His muscles relaxed and his head arched down,

Buddum, Buddum, Buddum, Buddum

Buddum, Buddum, Buddum

Buddum.

Bud-dum.

The heartbeat slowed. And so did the clock. Side to side, A's silhouette swayed side to side on its knees, keeping the rhythm ingrained. The strike of the church's great bell on the hour resonated slowly and deeply, each waver of its tone moving up and down like a lazy river's stream. Veltos watched his son carefully, unaware of what was going on. A Violetta can't do this. Was such an ability even possible with science? Was this a transfiguration? How… Compelling. The bulk of Astreaus's brown hair fell flat like a wilting flower around his headband, his hair turning violet crossing into a dark Indigo blue. The church, the anime, him and his mother's life together. It was all just fantasies. It was all fake. There is no God or Goddess. He would have to take that place himself. For the first time ever, Veltos's eyes met with his son's. They were like his, but indigo now faded into the violet eyes' centers like the core of a flame. And his thoughts came to a conclusion.

You say I can't distinguish this from reality,

But that's perfectly fine with me.

I'm a house of thoughts, a bed of lies,

But each of those lies gives me butterflies.

I lay around, like a dormant seed.

But I run on dreams, that's how I'll always be.

Violetta was now not the only one with watchful eyes. And the way his son's lips curved around that newfound grin alone was quite the more skin-crawling visage than he in his entirety. He might have to think outside the box for this one.

"A beautiful day for hell, don't you think?"

This wasn't the story of a child victimized by a great evil. It was the story of a child bekneeling a god and taking a religion by storm.