Chapter 45 – I’ll Remember

Krizza rode with them back to Toronto. She told them about her work as a feature writer in the local newspaper. They learned about what happened to her after the surgery and the guys told her about their memories in Seoul together, especially the web drama. But no one told her about what she and Young Hyun meant to each other. He asked them not to. He did not want to make things awkward between them.

When they arrived in Toronto, he and Krizza took a cab home. They were alone together at last...but Young Hyun was nervous.

"They're fun." She said with a smile plastered on her face. "So I'd been in Seoul and it seemed I really had a wonderful time."

"Are the memories not coming back?" He was afraid it was like that.

She thought for a while. "I guess they are. When Sungjin talked about the web drama, I remembered a school. It was faint, but I guess you can call that memory."

He was relieved. So it was helpful after all.

"But I felt there is still something missing. Something really important as if…if I won't remember it, I won't remember everything."

He looked away and did not say anything.

When they arrived in their neighborhood, he climbed out of the taxi with her in front of her house. He was reminded of the time when he would accompany her back or fetch her from her apartment. He missed that and all the moments with her.

"You don't have to walk me home. You should have alighted in front of your house." She said when the cab left.

He shrugged. "It's fine. Our house is just a few steps away anyway. And besides, I have something to ask."

She faced him. "What is it?"

"Do you want to go back to Seoul?"

She stilled, probably shocked by the question.

"I know it's sudden, but I believe it's better for you to go back there if you wanted for your memories to return." Chaebal, he secretly pleaded.

"I...I don't know."

His heart sank.

"I'm contented with my life now. Nothing's waiting for me there."

I've been waiting for you, he wanted to say.

He nodded despondently. "I understand."

She smiled, but it did not seem to reach her eyes. "Good night, Brian."

He watched her turned away...again. It was painful.

...

They left Canada the next day and he never saw her again since then. It was hard for him to let her go just like that, but he did not know what to do. He had to go back to Seoul because their comeback was just around the corner.

The days after that became excruciatingly long again. He should have been happy for seeing her again, but he could not. He still loved her and it hurt him knowing she might never come back to him again.

"10 bun namaseo! Junbiga dwita." (Ten minutes to go! Get ready.) The production director called out to the DAY6 members.

They were in Mnet studio, where they would be recording their comeback performance that would be aired on the night of November 4th, their comeback date. It was their second comeback that year and their last comeback together before Sungjin would enlist in the military.

Young Hyun stood up to get ready, checking his appearance on the mirror for the last time. In the past, he usually joked around with the other members before they go on stage. However, it all changed when Krizza left him brokenhearted.

He was about to go out when Jae suddenly exclaimed in surprise, catching everyone's attention.

"Ya! Krizza is in Seoul?"

Young Hyun quickly went to him and peeked over his shoulder. Sungjin, Wonpil and Dowoon crowded around him as well, their eyes glued on the eldest's phone.

"Naneun geunyeoka imi geunyeowi Instagram-eul bihwalseonghwahaetdagu saegukhaetda." (I thought she already deactivated her Instagram.) Sungjin wondered just like the rest of them.

Krizza did indeed deactivate her Instagram account when she left.

"Igateun saerowun gat-ida." (But this is new.) Jae said. "Brian, these pictures are recent. Even the account is only a week old."

"It isn't fake, it is?" Young Hyun's heart was beating fast. If the account and photos were real...

"It seems so," Jae answered. "Martin Cerulean is following it. Oh?" He exclaimed another word of surprise.

"Mwo? Mwo?" (What? What?) Even Wonpil was excited.

Jae showed them a picture of Krizza and some people familiar to them, the production staff they worked with on the web drama a year and months ago.

"This has just been posted by CJ E&M! It means she's really here!"

Young Hyun wanted to cry that moment, but he could not because they were already called to go on stage. Still, it felt like a dream come true. He felt surreal. He could not help, but smile.

He was feeling good when they went on stage. He was bouncing with joy. However, his world seemed to stop when he saw the one he was praying to see again. She was there, standing on the far side of the studio, but he could see her clearly. She seemed uncomfortable, but she smiled when their eyes met.

Jjang...

His eyes started to swell with tears that he tried to hold. But he was succumbed by the overwhelming feeling. They had to stop and repeat the take, but he was already tearing up. Jae went to him to ask him what's wrong, but he just shook his head and smiled.

The fans even started to chant, "Uljima! Uljima! Uljima!"

So he wiped his tears and said, "Keugeon amu ilda anida. Nan geujeo haengbokhada." (It's nothing. I'm just happy.)

Sungjin saved him by telling everyone they would start again. Jae patted him and went back to his spot. They began the recording again this time without flaw. It was smooth and lit.

After the recording, he immediately went out and looked for Krizza. Some of the fans, who attended, saw him and even tried to catch his attention, but he ignored them. He had one mission: to get hold of Krizza and tell her everything.

But he already reached the side of the road and yet, he could not see her. He was panting and sweating.

He took the chance of calling her old phone number, hoping again and again.

"Hello?"

He almost cried when she answered the call. She answered the call!

"Where are you?" He asked.

"Brian?"

He frowned. Her voice sounded near and he could hear the same background noise in his surroundings.

He turned around and at that moment, the whole world seemed to stop again. Without further thinking, he closed their distance and hugged her tight to makeup those months of hurting and longing.

"I thought I won't see you again." He said in between tears. "I thought you don't want to come to Seoul."

He felt her arms went around him. It made him cried harder. He missed her. He goddamn missed her.

"I...I already knew who you are even before we met at your parents' house."

What?

He let go of her for a while and stared at her at an arm's distance.

She took out a piece of paper from her pocket and gave it to him. It was a note.

"I saw that between the pages of my favorite book days after the surgery. I don't remember when I wrote that, but it brought some faint memories of someone I do not remember."

He was reading the note while listening to her and it made his heart constrict with mixed emotions.

"Then I started looking for a person named Brian. So many different faces came out on the internet, but I was like...he's not it. I was afraid to ask my family and friends because they were afraid of the things I might remember. Even I thought the same that it might be okay not to remember and just forget. Still...I felt empty."

What if they never met again?

"When we came to Toronto, I met your parents. They told me a lot about you—your childhood, your dreams when you were young, your passion...I actually learned a lot about you." She smiled, her eyes brimming with tears. Her hand reached for his face and wiped his cheeks. "You, who my mind may have forgotten, but my heart doesn't. I listened to your mother almost every day as she told me about you and it somehow fills the void I felt. Believe me. I told myself, he must be the Brian I know."

He smiled despite the tears.

"And when I saw you that night," she cried harder. "I was convinced that it's you, but I was embarrassed. I hurt you. Am I even worthy of you?"

He shook his head intently. "Don't think that way. Yes, I was hurt when you left me, but it did not...did not erase the love I feel."

"Still, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I lied. I'm sorry I left. I'm sorry I forgot--"

Young Hyun did not let her finish what she wanted to say and instead claimed her lips as if it was his. Finally.

He heard gasps around them, but he did not care. They were in their own world.

He cut the kiss, but let their eyes remained closed and their foreheads touching. "It doesn't matter what you forgot. I have remembered them for you and I'll help you remember them again. Just...don't leave me again. Okay?"

She nodded.

He hugged her again as if afraid to let her go again. "Saranghae," the word he would never forget to tell her.

"Mahal din kita." Krizza told him.

He smiled, his eyes sparkling with happiness. He saw his friends in the distance with their fans behind them. Jae was grinning and half-hugging Wonpil. Sungjin was wiping his tears like a cool guy he was while Dowoon kept on saying, "Oh. Neomu Ogeulkeorinda."

-END-