That's it.
I'm a coward.
A pathetic fool who doesn't deserve to exist.
But what could I have done. Just look into her grieving eyes and listen to her confess that she didn't love me while pretending to be strong?
No. I couldn't do that.
I was not brave enough to do that. If I had kept on looking into her eyes any more than a second I was afraid she would hold me her grateful prisoner forever. Drowning me in that incessant cycle of regret and hurt, never letting me go. She was so tragically beautiful. She was a mess of gorgeous chaos, and I could see it in her eyes. Even though I had half the mind to let her have her way, but in the end.... I guess I couldn't. I just couldn't seem to endure the reality that I was responsible for the state she was in.
To have the woman I love make such an expression was appalling. And I was willing to do anything to make it better for her. Give up anything.