Ashe's cheeks were burning up.
She couldn't feel her feet anymore.
Her legs gave in and she fell to the floor, her eyes fixated on the screen. Her breath hitched and she tried to keep it in. A few people started to stare at this scene in a supposedly five star hotel.
Tasha curled her fists in anger, but she was quick to recover…at least for now. She bent down and held her shoulders, "Ashe, we need to leave."
She pointed to the screen, her hands barely lifting, "T-tasha…who is that?"
Tasha stared at this broken girl on the marbled tiles of the hotel floor. Her eyes were round in pain, her face pale. She remembered how much those two fought. Always bickering about the smallest of things, like all siblings.
But seeing her like this, it pierced through something in Tasha. Unknowingly, a tear left her eye and streamed down her face.
"He's not dead, Ashe. He can't be," Tasha assured her and helped her get up. Ashe turned to look at her, "What do you mean? That person in the screen isn't my brother?" Her voice was raw and sore…like she had swallowed sandpaper.
"It's going to be okay…" Tasha tried to tell her but she shook her off, her face really heating up now.
"That's my brother over there!" she yelled, pointing at the screen, "DON'T TELL ME IT WILL BE OKAY WHEN HE JUST FELL 50 METRES DOWN!"
Tasha closed her eyes and breathed hard, trying to ignore the receptionist who had noticed this commotion and was calling the security now.
"He fell into water," Tasha reasoned. Inside, she was just trying to find reason after reason to convince Ashe that he was okay…so that Tasha herself might be convinced too. This was tearing both of them apart.
Ashe sobbed harder and pushed Tasha away, "What kind of personal assistant are you?"
Were. Past tense. Tasha wanted to correct her. She had still been angry with the whole firing thing….but she couldn't be angry over a dead person. Another reason he had to be alive. He can't die, just like that. No way.
Ashe continued when she realised that Tasha had no idea what she was talking about.
"Darren hates the water. He never learnt how to swim," Ashe buried her head between her legs on the floor. She wanted to go to him now and bring him back to life and slap him from jumping.
'Why did he do it?' Ashe inhaled deep before controlling her tears, 'Was it because he got arrested? That means Death Six got arrested too…there's no other reason.' Ashe banged her head on the floor, "I failed. I fucking failed."
She looked up and met Tasha's steeled eyes, "He gave me one job. And I failed to do it. I should have died in his place. Tasha make it stop," she begged, her tears breaking out again.
Strong hands gripped her shoulders and pulled her up. "Misses, you need to leave this place."
Tasha nodded but Ashe shook them off violently, "Don't fucking touch me!"
"Ashe…" Tasha tried to push her outside but Ashe shook her off too and ran out of the hotel by herself, leaving drops of tears on the floor.
"I'm so sorry, Darren. I let you down…Systema Games is over because of me. I should have-"she paused, huffing, "I should have just let the Inexa eat Adrien."
She was standing in a quiet place outside the hospital. So she didn't hold back. Opening her tear traced mouth, she screamed to the sky, "I'M SORRY DAD!"
"I'm selfish, I'm insecure and complete loser. I can never do anything on my own, so please leave me alone, dear life and please…please bring Darren back to life," she looked down at her feet, her hands going limp.
The ache in her heart…it was too much. Only if she had made a better decision. But she had let her hormones and love rule it. If she had let him get eaten by the Inexa, Darren would have been alive. It was either him or Adrien.
"It's not fair…" she huffed, "It's not fair at all."
"Ashe, you okay? Let's go home," Tasha's calming voice sounded from behind her. Ashe turned around and frowned.
"Do you not care at all, Tasha? You sure look like you don't," Ashe accused, assessing her calm demeanour. Why was she acting like this?
"I do. I just…I don't take it out like you do. We're both different people. Just because a person doesn't show emotion, doesn't mean they don't have them. Do you want to go home…or to the hospital?" Tasha asked sheepishly, not sure how to treat a 16 year old like Ashe. She was never sure at what line teenagers were calm and what line they went crazed, so she was careful to tread slowly.
"I…" Ashe couldn't believe it. Even when her brother is probably dying right now, she was worried about Adrien too. They must have got arrested. Where were they taken? Are they okay? Or are they dead too?
She wanted to go to her brother…but she had a debt to complete. Her mission wasn't over yet. Before her brother breaths his last, Ashe wanted to complete this and save all the years of hard work of both her father and her brother.
It wasn't too late yet.
"No," she said, standing up straight, "Take me to Death Six."
Tasha gulped at this answer. What was she thinking?
"But why?"
Ashe's eyes glazed over and Tasha held her breath as she saw the look in her eyes. A second before they were raging with sadness and pain but now…
They were emotionless. Cold and determined.
"I need to get this over with. Take me to them, Tasha."
Tasha shook her head, "Let it slide, Ashe. The government will handle them. Don't you think you should see your brother instead?"
"I can't meet his eyes again without finishing this," Ashe reasoned and Tasha knew that there was no going back now. Ashe needed to do this. If she didn't, it would constantly rip her with what ifs.
"Fine." Tasha called a cab and accompanied her to the police station which the news channel had shown. They were most likely being held in there. How was this 16 year old going to kill a boy in the middle of a whole gang police men anyway?
"Tasha," Ashe quietly called Tasha in the cab.
She nodded her head, staring right ahead, "Yeah?"
"If I don't finish this off by tonight, take my mom to my grandma's. And sell our current house to pay for your sister abroad, because without Systema Games, you'll lose your job. And if Darren is still alive, be with him. He is more comfortable around you. And-"
Tasha tried to stop her from spouting nonsense, but Ashe continued.
"And the rest five boys, if the government lets them go free, find good jobs for them. They work really hard. Please don't leave them alone to fend for themselves. Especially Romeo. He's really soft. Kai and Ethan will do fine, if possible put them in one job. They need to get over their differences. Luca and Jae-suk...make sure they don't go hungry. They become different people when they do," Ashe chuckled lightly, despite herself.
"That's a lot of responsibilities," was all Tasha could say, turning her head to look at this girl. 'She has changed so much,' Tasha thought, 'What happened to the little girl who always sat on her phone and read books and never stepped out of her comfort zone?'
Ashe smiled, "I know. I trust you." Ashe didn't know what trust was anymore, but anyway, she said it.
"Why are you talking like you're going to go away?"
"Because," Ashe breathed, closing her eyes and opening them again, "If I fail to do this, then there is no purpose left for me. I'll finish myself so that I won't have to face Darren as a failure again."
Tasha's jaw dropped, "You're going to do what?!"
Ashe kept her smile one, a sad one. "It's either me or Adrien now."