WORTH IT?

Being in that situation definitely felt like it happened for years. It was ridiculous how a couple of days made me feel like i was in eternal suffering. I was definitely weak as compared to most people out there with the added weight of a guilty conscience made it extra tough to get through it. By that time a new week had already started and all of my employees had not seen me for a week which was something that had ever happened. I avoided going on vacations or being away from my office it felt safe always being around there. My only hope was that i did not reach and find my entire office burnt to crips due to a random fire started by a coffee machine or some other stupid occurrence that could suddenly happen.

The Executive obviously left me to clean up the story that they started on my having a mystery non existent disease. that would take at least a week for it to cool down or i could just wait for my sister to get another life time achievement to get the attention away from me and my company. For once in my life I actually wanted her to do something outrageously impossible enough to make me invisible for a long while.I believed in her.Internally i was cheering on her to do anything really even if it was marrying a wealthy prince from whatever country out there.nonetheless these were all wishes and when i wanted my sister to do anything she would never do it. It was like she could read my mind and make sure to be annoying just at the perfect time.

That morning felt like a huge weight was lifted off my body and i could finally breathe.I remember being excited to go to work which was a huge deal for me. I even wore my favorite black T-shirt. Just to avoid judgement that black T-shirt is amazing. the material and fit are beyond human understanding and it just felt right.Even though i do not believe in luck in most times in life i felt like the T-shirt would at least make my day bearable. Other than that i could be completely wrong and that day could easily be the day that a meteor strike the earth and i die a pathetic death. I tried my best to be positive and still let my pessimism be prepared for anything that could go wrong.

I started doing some random breathing exercises that i found online that promised to make me feel relaxed and calm. it was combined with some hand movements that involved me rubbing my eyes with my index fingers at the same speed at which i was breathing. Not too complicated but i did look like an a penguin trying to touch its forehead. In the middle of my ritual of calling the relaxation i heard a someone laugh. Turning towards the entrance of my home was Miranda in her disguise as Jen Blue holding her phone clearly taking a video of me.

"Is this what you have been doing for the past week?" she asked bursting into laughter.

" i have not seen you for a week and this is how you choose to greet me at my stupid hour."

" i could not wait for you to come to work so i decided to come to you."She said putting her phone away and walking towards me elegantly.

It was always odd seeing Miranda act like Jen Blue mainly because i knew it was all an act. On the outside, another human being would be totally convinced that Jen was a real person. Of course all i saw was a disguise and nothing else. As she walked towards me inching closer and closer which made me feel uncomfortable. All i wanted to do was run when she walked up to me as if she wanted to threaten me about something serious like how people do it in soap operas that my mother always used to watch when i was kid.

She proceeded to reach me and touched my arm as i looked at her as if she was crazy. She was definitely trying something and acting extra. She looked at me and grabbed me by my neck and lowered my head towards her and passed my face with an inch.

"what are you doing?" i asked as i was uncomfortably positioned near her face.

"Can't be happy that my boyfriend is cured of his illness?"she asked totally feeding into the story about having a mysterious illness.

It was a signal for me to continue acting like she was Jen Blue and i had to make sure we were all lovey-dovey and intimate and all those actions. It was definitely not my style to act like the movie boyfriends who effortlessly end up in every person's dreams. I was awkward with such stuff especially knowing the actual current position that I was in with Miranda it just made me feel more opposed to the idea of acting like a couple for a government agency who might not even believe in our relationship to begin with.But i did owe it to all of us to act the part.

" I am just glad that you were worried about me." I said trying to improvise my way through the so called relationship.

"of course i was worried about you ,There is never not a time i am thinking about you."She said now relaxing herself.

Now that she was closer i could hear her breathing perfectly. That was the first realized that her heart beat constantly fluctuatates . She must have been actually worried about something or she was even worried about me and wanted to hide that fact. I slowly place my arms around her and hugged her.Everyone needs a hug now and then even when you can be a super agent trying to take down a government organization, they still need a hug.

We stood there in silence and i could feel her heart rate slowly go to a normal pace. It had been a long time since i had actually felt some peace withing myself and i felt tranquil. It was like a ray sunshine and comfort. Miranda's presence was enough to give me all that and i was glad that i had her after going through a week of mental anguish.

"Cy you can let go of me now." she said breaking my train of thought.

"oh sorry." i said releasing her awkwardly not even realizing how i had managed to lose myself in my own thoughts.

" At least i know that my baby is still good to go."she said smiling.

For Miranda to refer to me as her baby i knew that she was pushing her own boundaries. Miranda always thought pet names were a waste of mental space and always preferred to just call me by my name. She would vomit just at those sweetie ,honey ,pumpkin names would be mentioned. I looked at her impressed that she could keep up the act without breaking character and just screaming at her own statements.I looked at her and smiled knowing that she was internally screaming and i could not wait to see how she would just go off when we are in a safe place together where she can go back to her usual self.

"Yeah so we can go."

"Oh before that i was too excited to submit my report ,but i am happy to tell you that we finally got the project to go through."She said smiling obviously referring to that piece of information she traded me for.

"Really?"I asked happily that my suffering at least amounted to something.

"Yeah there were some things that may need your assistance but we can solve that later."

"I guess I am starting my day with some good news after all,"I said smiling at the very thought that we were close to our target.

" shall we go or are you still trying to summon the toad angels. demon things."

"it was relaxation exercises and yeah we can leave i was just calming my nerves before going to work."

" Then we better get going."she said grabbing my hand and walking me out as lovely as she could manage.

All that i could hear and think about was that all i went through was worth it and made significant step to our goal