Chapter 1- I Wish I Met You Earlier

Learn to distinguish who deserves an explanation and who does not. -Unknown

My alarm goes off, bah bah da bah bah. I groan and search for my phone on my bed. Bah bah da bah bah, it continues to ring, my frustration grows because I cannot seem to find it.

"God damn phone, where are you?" I sound insane, like I'm expecting it to say, here I am, look here or look there.

I toss and turn lifting my blanket, the warmth leaving my body, nope; it's not on the bed. I roll over and look under my bed, found it. I grab and it hit the snooze button instead of the dismiss button.

"Jeeeezzzz."

I flop back down onto my lopsided pillow. I look at the time, 6:15 am. Damn it's way too early to get up. I dont have to be at work until 8:30 am. Putting my phone down on the bed, I turn on my left side, calling on sleep to come back and take me. I lay there, nothing, can't fall alseep. I wanna cry, feeling the headache coming on from not getting enough sleep. Why? My boyfriend and I had a stupid argument, that kept me up most of the night.

I grab my phone, checking to see if I got any messages from him. Yeppppp.

Matthew: You only think about yourself.

Matthew: I am finished Amelia, I am finished.

Matthew: You always play the victim. ALWAYS.

Matthew: I love you so much. You have no idea how much I love you, but you are an ASS

I look up to the ceiling and say, "we have a small arguement and now you have a stick up your ass, AGAIN."

I hit the space to type a reply, you know what, I won't even bother. He's just gonna spin everything on me anyway. I look back at the time, 6:45 am. Shit, I only looked at his messages.

I got out of bed and walked towards the bathroom, took a shower, brushed my teeth and got dressed, grabbed my keys and left the house. You must be wondering? No breakfast, no tea? Nope, it's too early to eat.

You must be wondering about me, well; my name is Amelia Banks, I'm 29 years old and I live in Edson.

I get out of bed and head towards the bathroom to do my daily routine. Looking into the mirror I wished I was a little taller than my 5 feet 4 inches.

God made me in his imagine and I love my body, all 163 pounds of it. After admiring myself in the mirror, I choose an outfit for work.

Walking to the kitchen, I finally decided on making toast with a cup of coffee, but that thought soon disappeared when I looked at the clock and saw that I would need to leave now or I would be late.

I had so many files on my desk waiting to be cleared and sent to the Accountant so that he could affix his signature to them. I'm an Accounting Clerk for Crenshaw's Health Department and we over see 74 health centres across the region.

I walked to the bus stop to wait on the 7:50 am bus, i had to be at work by 8:30 am. I had plenty of time before I needed to be there,hoping that the his comes early.

I plug my ear phones in my ears and pull up the app on my phone, trying to find the book I was reading yesterday. I checked my library, it wasnt there, realizing that I didn't save it.

Biting my lip trying to remember what the name of the book was. I give up, I couldn't remember. I'll just search for another. I checked my watch, 7:49 am and just as I looked up, I saw that the bus coming--right on time.

I stepped on, swiped my card and took a seat.

I look to my left and I see a couple holding hands, smiling and talking to each other, I turn away scowling. My love life is now falling to pieces, It wasn't always like that though. I glanced again the the couple's direction, my mind reflecting on my relationships with Matthew. 

I met my boyfriend when I was 15 and he was 16, we dated for a few months, then decided we wanted to be together.

We were together for two years, I thought It was bliss, then the arguments started and we chose to go our separate ways. We stayed in touch over the years and a few years later during the Christmas season, we literally ran into each other at Pink's  Cafe.

I was 21 and he had just turned 23, we started talking and decided we would try again.

It didn't work that time either, continuous arguing, didn't last a month. Tried again when I was 24, didn't last six months. Tried again when I was 27, that lasted a year, we took a one month break and now we are back together. Notice a pattern?

My phone dings. I looked down at my phone, I had received a message from a friend of mine, Dwight. 

Dwight: Good morning Sunshine. Sorry about last night, I fell asleep. On my way to work, are you at work? if not then have a safe journey.

Dwight, a guy I met a 9 months ago on Instagram, he's been the person that I can talk to about anything.

When we started getting to know each other and he said that he liked me, but since I'm in a relationship he'll settle for being a friend. He's a good guy and he had a great personality.

Sunshine. Gets me everytime, if only Matthew would do this. He use to, not anymore. I send a quick reply to Dwight.

Me: Good morning, it's ok, I understand. I am passing Bob's Pizza Place, so I'll be there in a few. I'll buzz you when I get to work. My mental state is messed up right now.

Dwight: ok Amelia, no problem. Is it him again? Don't worry, I'm here if you need me.

Sometimes, I wish I had met him before I got back together with my boyfriend, I didn't bother to reply.

Looked up and saw that my stop was coming up.

I got off and mentally prepared myself for the shit day, I'm about to have.

☆☆☆☆☆