Chapter 14

They ate in a silence so thick with unspoken words Zane thought he could reach out and touch it. Dara finished first then sat there with her hands folded in her lap, eyes focused on her feet while he ate the rest of his meal. The extremeness of her subservience made him angrier by the minute. Anyone who lived the real D/s lifestyle knew it was the only relationship built 100 percent on trust. That the power exchange was what made it work. A sub giving that power of domination to him was a true gift.

Zane still recalled the first time a friend had taken him to a private club and given him the opportunity to explore urges and desires he had no idea what to do with. That first night he'd just watched the performances, stunned people were doing these things in front of an audience but totally aroused both by their unselfconsciousness and by the performance itself. He'd gone back again and again, finally applying for his own membership, and begun training to be a Dom.

Yes, training. Something people outside the lifestyle didn't know about. It took skill and knowledge to dominate, to make bondage a pleasure for one's sub, to inflict just the right amount of pain in the correct places. He learned about safe words and aftercare, and all the things that made subs trust their Doms. He'd become skilled with the Florentine flogger and the many ways a sub could be bound to give both of them pleasure. The club had become his lifeline when he was between missions that sucked the soul out of him.

However, there were assholes out there who confused domination and abuse, Doms who had not been properly trained. They gave the lifestyle a bad name and created emotionally destructive situations like the one he was sure Dara had run from. He was torn between wanting her to talk about it and bring her fear out in the open and telling her to just sit in a corner until he could get her back to the mainland.

Being around her was dangerous for him, calling up memories and needs he had to keep submerged. Looking forward to a reunion with Lily was what had kept him going this last time. That made her betrayal that much worse for him. He wasn't sure he'd ever trust a sub again. He was very grateful Derek had stepped up and offered this cottage where he could hide away from the world.

Until today.

Don't get involved. Don't get involved,

He chewed and swallowed the last bite of his sandwich, washing it down with the rest of his beer. He knew he was drinking too much and should cut back on the alcohol, but it smoothed out the rough edges so well. He justified it in his own mind by sticking to beer and staying away from the hard stuff.

The moment he set the empty bottle down on the table, Dara popped up from her chair, gathered the plates and debris and carried it all to the sink, scurrying like a frightened mouse.

"Leave that." He hoped his voice wasn't as dictatorial as he thought.

"It's my job." She found the dish soap and began filling the sink. "I'm a good dishwasher."

She said the words in such a flat tone, it made a tiny chill run down Zane's spine. She sounded as if she'd had to defend herself so many times, she spoke the words by rote. The more he listened and watched, the angrier he became. He was sure if whoever the asshole was who had turned her into little more than an automaton was right in front of him, he'd smash his face to pieces. Then he put a rein on his anger, roping it in. Not getting involved, he told himself. He'd tell her he'd take her to the mainland as soon as the storm let up, give her some money, which she no doubt needed, and come back to his isolation.

But, somehow, things weren't working out that way. Dara finished the dishes, wiping them until they sparkled then cleaning the sink and the counter. When she was through, she folded the dish towel and sat in one of the straight chairs, as if waiting for instructions. Which Zane was pretty sure was the case.

He started to take out another bottle of beer then changed his mind and went for a soft drink, to his own amazement. He gestured with the bottle to Dara in silent offering. She just shook her head and sat there, hands folded in her lap and eyes focused on her feet.

Okay, enough of this shit. If a Dom is what she needs, a Dom is what I'll give her, no matter how difficult it is for me.

And difficult didn't begin to describe it all. He was seized by an overwhelming desire to erase everything this asshole had done to her, and he had no idea why the fuck that was. He'd felt nothing but pain for so long. Maybe what he needed was to absorb someone else's for a change.

"Where are you from?" He tried to make his tone of voice level and calm.

Dara twisted her hands in her lap. "Tampa. Sir."

"And how did you get to Fort Myers?"

"With - " She caught herself and sucked in a breath, as if not sure what to tell him.

Zane couldn't stand it. "Come here, Dara."

Face pale, she walked over and stood in front of him, waiting.

"Sit on my lap." He patted his thighs.

This was a dangerous game he was playing. He had to be careful not to send the wrong signals, but this woman pushed buttons that had been stuck in place for a long time. She sat where he indicated, her movements wary, and waited again for him to speak.

Zane began to stroke her back in an idle rhythm, running his fingers along her spine. She was stiff as a board, but he kept up the slow, gentle strokes, moving his fingers to her neck, down her spine again, and along the swell of her ass. He wanted to squeeze those delectable globes, run the tips of his fingers into the hot crevice, maybe turn her over his knee and spank those rounded globes until they turned a beautiful shade of red.

No! I am a miserable ass. This woman has been terrorized by someone and all I can think of is all the things I want to do with her.

On the heels of that came a jolt of awareness. For the first time since the clusterfuck in Afghanistan and the emotional disaster with Lily, he had the desire for a submissive. Unfortunate for him the woman in question was in a fragile emotional condition. He dug deep for inner control, telling himself to focus on her. That was the key.

"It's obvious you're running away from something," he began. "Or someone. No right-minded person would put themselves out on the water in a storm like this. Not when it was so obvious to me you had no idea what the hell you were doing."

Dara hunched her shoulders and seemed to draw in on herself.

"I'm sorry, sir. Please forgive me."

"Dara." He sighed, even as he continued to stroke her body. "I am not your Sir." At least not yet. "I'm not anyone's Sir. At least right now." And maybe never again. "But I take it you've been in a D/s relationship gone very wrong. I think you need to tell me about it."

She jerked at his words. "You - You know about the lifestyle?"

"I do. It's who I am."

"Do you - " She wet her lips. "Do you have a sub now?"

Lily's betrayal slammed back into him and it took all his mental willpower to shove it in the back of his mind.

"No. Not now." He ground his teeth. "I'm not in the proper frame of mind to be a good Dom. To anyone."

"But - "

"Don't push me." He hadn't meant to sound so angry and wished he could take his comment back. Or at least his tone of voice.

If possible, she tried to shrink herself even smaller. Then, twisting, she tried to push herself off his lap and out of his hold. He wasn't about to let her go, however. He turned her and tilted her chin up with the tip of his finger. She tried to avoid looking at him, but he refused to let that happen.

"Please let me go." Again, her voice was so soft, he had to strain to hear it. "I don't want to cause trouble. You should have just left me out there."

"Not a chance." He shook his head. "Everything else aside, that storm out there is a killer. I'm not about to go out in it again and I'm your only way off this little island. But I'm concerned about what drove you out there."

She bowed her head. "Nothing you can help me with."