Chapter 12: Thou Shalt Not Kill, Part 2

"There's a grocery store not too far away from here," the brunette cheerleader added.

"Maybe we can catch their supply trucks coming in," Brolin interjected. Everyone was thinking now.

"Maybe later," Derek said, "but we need food now. We can't wait that long."

"We can go back to the school," I replied. Silence suddenly filled the room and everyone was looking at me.

"Yeah, right! To turn ourselves in?" Trevor retorted sarcastically, voicing the silent thoughts of everyone in the room.

There was a grumble of agreement; all agreed with Trevor.

"No, I mean it!" I had their attention again. "There's food in the cafeteria, right? There's always food in the freezer and in the walk-in coolers. We can wait 'til dark and break in. No one will see us."

"And you don't think there'll be guards?" Scott retorted sarcastically.

"Not at night, I don't think so," I replied, thinking as I spoke. "Look, not to sound callous, but they already cleared away the bodies today, or at least, most of them. I'm sure they won't be working all night, too. Earlier today, there was only one truck and four guys. No one else! What makes you think that they will still be there? They're not going to spend the night! And I don't think that guarding an empty school is going to be top priority on their list. They've already secured it."

From the look on the faces of everyone in the cave, they were beginning to see my reasoning behind the idea.

"Derek, why don't we go? Everyone else can stay here and build a fire," I said, leveling a glance at Derek.

"Not on your life," Trevor interrupted.

I looked at Derek, ignoring Trevor. "If it's just the two of us, we can sneak in. If you take Trevor, you know he'll lose his cool …"

"And if he takes you," Trevor interrupted, "you'll let him die if he gets caught."

"How do you know?!" I yelled, wheeling on Trevor, my eyes flaring. The day was wearing on us all.

"Enough!" Derek interjected, his eyebrows pulling together, trying to think. "Jada, I think you need to go with us, just in case someone's there. Right now, until we get some guns, you're the best weapon we have. Scott, Brolin, and Casey, you come, too."

"If she goes, I go," Trevor countered, looking right at me. I didn't flinch away from his glare.

"Trevor, I need you to stay here with … what's your name?" Derek looked at the boy with the black curly hair and Hispanic features.

"Carlos," he supplied.

"And everyone else needs to stay here to start a fire in the cave entrance," Derek continued. "But you have to wait until nightfall so no one will see. You two … what are your names?" Derek asked the two cheerleaders.

"Brittany," the blonde supplied.

"Markesha," the mahogany skinned brunette replied.

"Let's go around the room and say our names so we all know each other," Derek instructed. And one by one, we took turns saying our first names.

"Good," Derek continued. "Brittany, Markesha, Carlos, and Trevor, gather up as much firewood as you can find while we're gone and start working on the fire."

Brittany started to object, but Markesha shook her head, then looked at Derek and nodded. Obviously, Markesha understood the importance of teamwork.

"Does anyone have a lighter or some matches?"

"I have a lighter," Trevor said.

"Good," Derek replied. "That helps. We can get more later."

"So, where are we going exactly?" Jada asked, tensed and ready to fight.

Then, Derek looked at me. "To the school."

At that moment, I could feel everyone's eyes on me. I nodded in agreement, standing my ground, knowing it was our best bet. We needed food now; we could hit the convenience store later. Listen to me, thinking about hitting a convenience store. Robbing it. But we would only be looking for food. Desperate times definitely called for desperate measures, and at that moment, things were pretty desperate. Looking around the room, we were all Catholic school kids and none of us would have ever thought of doing such things under normal circumstances. Contemplating stealing and murder. But these circumstances were definitely not normal. You have to do what you have to do in order to survive. God help us all.

So, for the moment, there was nothing to do but wait. Wait for dark to come so we could move. We were hiding out in a cave like rats. As my thoughts began to drift, I wondered if Trevor was right. Could I pull the trigger if I had to? As I contemplated the answer, the commandment Thou Shalt Not Kill rang loudly within my ears. And I wondered, if I had to, could I do what it took to save another? Could I actually take one life to save another? As I closed my eyes and leaned against a nearby cave wall, waiting for darkness to fall, the faces of my loved ones ran through my mind, playing itself over and again like a movie: Brandon … Mom … Dad … Timmy … Derek … Could I kill to save them? And as I saw their faces flash over and over before my closed eyes, in my heart I knew the answer that my mind refused to see.

***

"Casey," I heard a voice say, feeling a hand gently shake my shoulder. "Casey, we have to go."

"Oh, just let her sleep. We don't need her." It was Scott, sounding more and more like Trevor.

I slowly opened my eyes and Derek, Scott, Brolin, and Jada were getting ready to go. I quickly jumped to my feet then swayed groggily. Derek quickly reached out a gentle hand to steady me. "Sorry, I must've dozed off," I said.

"It's okay," Derek replied with a smile, rubbing the back of my shoulder. "If you're not up to it …"

"No," I quickly cut him off. "Let's go."

Derek nodded and we started off. As we left the cave, it was completely dark. At first, I couldn't see anything. The only light was faint moonlight, turning everything a slight bluish black. But I could see everything once my eyes adjusted.

We didn't run this time, but paced ourselves at a manageable walk.