Chapter 14

Angela sniffed and wiped her nose on the back of her hand. Domingo went to the sink to get a cloth, and when he turned round, he saw the most extraordinary thing. The marmalade cat, taking advantage of his absence, had jumped onto Angela's knee and was looking up at her intensely. Then, very slowly and deliberately, he put up a paw and patted her gently on the cheek. Angela looked down and smiled through her tears.

"See," said Domingo. "He does not think you killed the kitten."

Angela looked up at him with a smile. He sat beside her and gently wiped her face with the cloth and she took a deep breath and continued.

"Anyway, it didn't last long after that. My dad came home and everything changed.My mother never hit me when my dad was there and now he was home for good. He was sixty-five and he was retired and she couldn't touch me. She still used to try and get me to do all the work, but my dad would say, 'Leave her be, Muriel. Let her be a child. Childhood is short enough as it is.' And my mother would glare at me when he wasn't looking, but she never hit me again...well, only once."

Domingo gave her an inquiring look.

"It was when my dad died," she said. "I was in the shop, serving Mrs Brown."

The scene was etched in her memory. In her mind's eye she could see every item on the shelf in front of her. She could see Mrs Brown as clearly as in a photograph. She was wearing a red headscarf and a brown felt coat. In the background she could hear her father stacking shelves in the back room.

"I was just asking her if she wanted anything else, when I heard a crash from the back room. Then nothing, not even a groan. A tin of peas rolled out of the door and went round in a circle. It went round very, very slowly and Mrs Brown said something, but it was very slow and deep and I couldn't make sense of it. And then I was running for the back room. And there was my dad, lying on the floor at the bottom of the ladder, with his eyes wide open, staring up at the ceiling. And I thought, 'Can you be unconscious with your eyes open?' But I knew, really. I knew."

Angela sighed once, very quietly.

"Mrs Brown went to get the doctor and I sat on the floor next to my dad pretending he was just resting, talking to him, saying everything would be all right, the doctor would be here in a minute and he would know what to do.

"Then Mrs Brown came back with the doctor and he bent down over my dad to examine him. And at that moment my mother came into the room. She stood stock still for a moment, looking at my dad on the floor and then she began to scream. She put her hands one on each side of her face, like this, and she screamed and screamed and screamed. Dr James got up from the floor and went over to her and slapped her just once, really hard, on her face. It sounded like a gunshot. And she shut up immediately. Then she looked straight at me and said, "What have you done?" And she ran at me and started hitting me on the head and shoulders. Dr James and Mrs Brown pulled her off me, but she went on screaming, "She did it! Murderess!" Over and over, pointing her finger at me. The doctor looked at Mrs Brown and raised his eyebrows.

"'It's quite ridiculous, Doctor,' she said. 'Angela was in the shop with me. We both heard him fall.'

"Dr James gave a little sigh and then said. 'Could you put the kettle on, Mrs Brown? I want to give her a strong cup of tea, preferably with some alcohol in it. Angela?' he went on, turning to me, 'Do your parents keep any alcoholic drink in the house?' I hesitated. 'Well, there's my dad's rum,' I said, 'but my mother never touches it.' 'It doesn't matter,' said the doctor. 'Go and show Mrs Brown where the tea things are and fetch her the rum. Then come back here.' And he knelt down again beside my father.

"As I left the room I heard my mother screaming. She was still screaming when I got back. The doctor got up wearily from the floor. 'It's bad news, I'm afraid, Angela,' he said. I just nodded. I didn't trust myself to speak. He came over and took my hand. 'Angela,' he said, 'there are certain things that have to be done and I need you to help.' I nodded again. 'Did your dad have any funeral insurance?' he went on. I looked at him blankly. 'Did the man from the Pru' come round once a week?' Once again I nodded. 'Then there'll be a certificate. Can you find it for me?'

"I went upstairs. My mother kept all the important documents in a green handbag on top of the wardrobe. I fetched it down and began to go through it, looking for 'Prudential' and 'funeral'. When I found the certificate and went back downstairs, the doctor had covered up my dad's face with the tablecloth and Mrs Brown was trying to make my mother drink from a cup. She pressed her lips together and turned her face away, just like a child when it doesn't want to eat its dinner. You know? Actually the stuff in the cup looked vile and I didn't blame her. Dr James went over and pinched my mother's nose and she gasped and drank in some of the disgusting stuff, then, to my surprise, she drank the rest in little, regular sips.

"Dr James and Mrs Brown were wonderful. They organised everything. Mrs Brown even wrote to every one of my brothers and sisters telling them when the funeral was to take place. But only one of them came. My eldest sister.She sat next to us at the funeral, she on one side, I on the other, and my mother in the middle.

After the service, she asked, 'Did he leave any money?'

'What?' I said.

'Did he leave any money?' she hissed. At that moment she looked so like my mother, I recoiled. 'Because, if he did, you've got to share it.'

'I don't think so,' I said. 'I haven't seen any.'

And my sister gave a snort of disgust and walked away. As she went she said over her shoulder, 'and you should take better care of Mother. I think she's wet herself.'"

Angela stopped abruptly and sat staring into space with an indecipherable expression.

"Well?" asked Domingo.

Angela shook herself and looked back at him. "Well what?"

"What happened next?"

"Nothing happened next. My mother took to her bed and never got up again. Not even to go to the toilet. I spent the next two years washing her and feeding her and changing the bedclothes and washing them, and running the shop and trying to keep the smell out of the shop." Angela said all in one breath, "Every day when I went into her room I thought she was dead. She used to go to sleep with her head hanging out over the end of the bed and this awful look of pain on her face. And then one day I went in and she actually was. She was dead. And I didn't know if I was glad or sorry. I couldn't imagine what I would do next. How I could live without her, you know? I had always hated her, but I didn't know what to do without her."

"Oh, Angela," said Domingo, and took her in his arms again. "I think you are the best and the bravest person I have ever known. You were wonderful. But it is over now and you can put it away. We will be Cenicienta and the Blue prince and we will live happily and eat partridges."

"Partridges?" said Angela.