Lucifer, my friend (1)

Tuesday was the first day Lucifer appeared. It happened almost a week after the deal, while Aaron was taking a bite of his sandwich, ignoring completely the weird mass that rested on the other plate next to it. Aaron didn't think that the day had something special; nothing remarkable happened that he could remember. He even had almost forgotten about the deal, the mark was fading and he was starting to think of that moment in the cemetery as a hallucination caused by Jose's death and his inability to cope with it.

He remembered having read something similar in his psychology class, so he hadn't thought that it was something important to tell his doctor because it wouldn't help him at all. Most likely, it would end in him spending more time in this place and, even if part of him wanted to be here, there was the other part that reminded him that the money spent would be better in Sophie's college's savings. He just needed to complete an eight-month trial period here and then he would be free, only needing to attend every session with his doctor, eat his pills and do all the things they asked him to do.

Aaron already knew how he needed to act. He only needed some practice so he could start socializing with people again and, luckily for him, his doctor thought that it was time for him to try group sessions considering 'how well he had done with Jose'. He said that he had progressed a lot and he didn't want him to erase that progress by excluding him from others. He said that this was a chance for him to 'open up'.

He hadn't punched him for speaking of Jose's death as if it were nothing only because he was his doctor.

"That's not a good excuse to not punch someone, you know?" a voice said and Aaron jumped on his seat, startled at the sound and at the figure he thought, and hoped, wouldn't see again.

"Y-You are…"

"Lucifer. We met before." He flashed a smile at him and extended his arm for a handshake.

Aaron didn't move, too stunned to try to make any movement. The Devil didn't seem to mind. He moved Aaron's hand slowly and placed it on top of his own. Aaron tried to jerk it away, surprised at the cold touch, but he found himself unable to do it, the grip didn't tighten or use any force against him, it merely held him firmly.

"I'm not very good with these so-called 'human mannerisms', Aaron," he stated, scrunching his nose at the word 'humans', "but even I know how important handshakes are for first meetings."

Ignoring their clasped hands, Aaron looked around quickly; glad when he found the space almost empty. John was in his usual corner but he seemed too engrossed in writing his story than in him. Linda was talking with one of the nurses but she was too far away to even notice him. When the cold hand moved away, he finally turned his attention to the being in front of him. Lucifer didn't seem to care that Aaron had ignored him; looking at his tray with curiosity and a hint of distaste as well. Did Satan even eat?

"No, I don't need it." He pushed a spoon into the puree, inspecting its consistency. "And I don't think this even qualifies as food."

"Were you─" Aaron swallowed his nervousness. "Were you reading my mind?"

"Is that a problem?" He tilted his head and placed his hand under his chin.

"Of course it is." Aaron furrowed his eyebrows but quickly amended himself when he remembered whom he was talking. "I mean, could─ um, could you please not do it with me?" Aaron glanced down and shook his head; he couldn't believe what he was asking. It was Satan the one who he was talking about. He frowned, or at least he thought it was Satan.

"Okay." Aaron sat upright and looked directly at him. He still had those amused eyes but the difference with the demon was that he didn't look as if he was laughing at him, it was more like the fact that he was here was what amused him.

"Okay?"

"Yes, Aaron. I said okay. I'm getting worried, you know, you keep repeating yourself."

He raised an eyebrow. "Are you really worried?"

"Well, no." Aaron blinked in surprise at the honesty, he unconsciously opened his mouth to ask, but he shut it almost instantly and decided to glance to the side. How did someone go about talking with the Devil? It was really weird to think about the being in front of him as such, considering how easy it was to speak with him. Of course, it was easy once you ignored that voice in the back of your head, the one Aaron was going to refer to as his survival instinct. But again Aaron had already tried to kill himself so it must have been almost nonexistent in the first place. Maybe it was fine to ask him things?

"Ask, Aaron. If I want I will answer."

Aaron's eyebrows knit in confusion. "I thought that you, um …" Lucifer waved his hand and motioned him to continue. "Were you reading my mind just now?"

"No, but you seemed nervous and I'm getting curious vibes from your soul."

What? "My soul?"

"Yes, and before you ask: No, I can't turn this off like I can with your thoughts." He grabbed his jelly and started to read the label. Aaron blinked several times at how surreal was to watch him.

"And why are you telling me this?"

He placed down the little jelly and raised an eyebrow at him. "Because you asked?"

"Yes, okay, I get that. That doesn't mean that you have to answer, right?"

"Right." He said the word slowly as if he was testing the word in his mouth and, by his look, it seemed that he didn't like it. He looked so normal and open when he talked; it was weird. Though, how would Aaron really know that he was telling the truth about not reading his thoughts and not just simply telling him that so Aaron could let his guard down? Wasn't he the Father of lies? He didn't remember a lot of religious lore, he was more interested in folklore, and neither Marcus nor dad believed. He met Pastor Lucas when he was little and went to mass with him, though only sometimes, and it didn't focus on the Devil too much.

He jumped on his seat for the second time that day when he felt cold fingers touching the back of his hand briefly. He looked upwards and saw Lucifer with two fingers still in the air. "You spaced out," he said.

"Sorry." Aaron rubbed a hand against his face and saw Lucifer looking even more amused at the words. Yeah, he probably wasn't used to people saying sorry to him. It was so odd that Aaron smiled a little against his hand.

- -

Since that day Lucifer started showing up, always at different times, three or four times a week and no more than an hour. It happened when he was alone or when there were few people in the room, never when there was someone beside him. Though it wasn't like Aaron talked a lot with others either, most of the time he was alone and he preferred it that way too. He grew too anxious when there were many people in a room with him, uncomfortable in his own skin.

He remembered the first time he went to the group session─ before Lucifer appeared for the first time. There were five? Six people? Aaron didn't pay attention, he was too concentrated in keeping his smile and in looking polite, trying to answer what was asked of him, preferring to be the one making questions so he won't talk too much, he had only listened or faked it that he did. When the nurse asked him to share, Aaron talked friendly and light, many years of lying to social services finally paid off, because the others seemed to buy it.

"If they take you, they'll keep you away from each other. You don't want to do that to Marcus, do you, Aaron?" The statement from many years ago drifted within his memory.

He started to talk with others after the sessions too, or more like the others started to talk with him. Aaron's palms were always clenched when it happened, but it kind of helped to distract him. He focused more on what to say and how to say it than in his own thoughts. His doctor approved how sociable he was getting and Aaron never told him how his palms sweated or how he stayed up many hours on his bed thinking in different scenarios. How the small silent in conversations felt so long and heavy, asphyxiating.

He only smiled at the doctor and told him how glad he was of recovering.

- -