One beautiful afternoon, my mother came to visit me. She arrived with a serious face. We had coffee and as she had an aching back, she lay on the bed and called me:
- Ana, I was praying for you and the Holy Spirit spoke to me: tell her that I was with her, but now I am no longer! The one who is with her is not me, he is unlike me, and he is deceiving her. Tell her that she has to be alone now, she shouldn't look for another man. She needs to remain calm and wait for the one that God is reserving for her. - he spoke quickly and firmly.
I was incredibly sad and cried inside.
- I didn't want to be alone. - I complained.
- You will not be alone; the Holy Spirit will come back to comfort you and keep you company!
I started to cry; I couldn't believe what I was hearing.
- I am not brave enough to send him away, I like him! - I said, trying to avoid crying.
- Everything has its time; God is telling you not to worry; at the right time you will know what to say to him.
I went to my room; I wanted to cry without people's notice and ended up sleeping. The next morning, I woke up very sad and asked:
- Why is God letting me go through all this?
And the angel answers:
- For love! Because you have to learn! Jesus went through all that because he also had to learn. It's for love...
- How hard it is to learn, angel! - I speak, crying.
My tears come down; I need strength to obey this command from God.
And now? What do I tell him? God is right because he does not make me happy and does not value me. A gold trophy for his work!
- Hi, my sister will stay with me for a few days, she is not very well. As I am going to undergo eye surgery this week, we will not see each other for a while. See you - I write, feeling sad.
- Hello, good morning! I hope it's not a big deal. Regarding seeing each other, when you are able to, tell me. See you later.
It was the only excuse that came to mind. I need to forget this man!
The weeks go by and I keep talking to him. How much temptation, how much contradiction!
Three months later...
- Would you like to go out for an ice cream or eat something? - he asks.
- Where are you?
- At home.
- I didn't know, I thought you were on the beach. Good to wake up in your bed, isn't it?
- Yes, it is much better. I have some office work tomorrow.
- Will you come to your house every weekend?
- In general, I come back on Saturday night and return to the beach on Monday, very early.
- Yes, let's have an ice cream, I miss you.
- I miss you too.
He comes home every weekend and doesn't see me! How difficult it is to find out that you are being despised by those you like! And I will still have some ice cream with him! How come? I'm a fool! I think he would call it off again... but no, he didn't!
The shadows of the night arrive and with them my guilty conscience for having disobeyed God. I kneel on the edge of the bed to pray and ask for forgiveness for my weakness. Then, I have a vision...
"Am I going to die? Will he die if we keep seeing each other? I'm scared, what a horrible vision! Forgive me, my God!" - I think, feeling scared.
I have another vision...
"The doll's head is in him! Now I know how she gets the job done! It means that the enemy took away his sight and left him confused, in doubt about many things." - I conclude.
One more vision...
"The word God written with the colors of the rainbow! What a beautiful sight! The letters appeared in the air, right next to me. They looked as if they were made of light bulbs! But this vision is out of context! What does it mean? I think I will find out at the right time"- I assess, feeling curious.
The next day, my mother comes home, and while we are having lunch, I tell her about my feeling upset with him, and having fallen into temptation:
- Can't you see, Ana? This man just wants adventures! He wants nothing! He is individualistic, he only sees what concerns him; he does not see your value! And in business too, he is not able to see what is good, and he often takes bad as good. The Lord has something better, someone who loves you!
- I know, I trust God. - I answer sadly.
- Ana, there is a spiritual abyss between you and that man, a gigantic abyss! He is materialistic, he only appreciates what he sees, and you, by being spiritual, will not be understood by him! To the Lord it is as if you have stumbled and fallen into a puddle of mud!
- I'll get up.
- That's right! The Lord wants you to rise again, Ana, and go the other way! That way leads to death, not carnal death, but the death of the spirit!
And God takes her and she eagerly speaks:
- Great is the victory I have for you! If you knew, you would say: I don't believe that! Great is the blessing, but don't get away from me! I want to get closer, but you won't let me. Come closer to me, then I will approach you. Get closer to me and I'll show you!
We finished lunch and after a few hours of conversation, she returned to her home.
On Sunday, I went to church, and while praying I have a vision...
After that vision, anyone would walk away. God, thank you for showing me what was hidden and for giving me strength! I wish I could control my feelings...