chapter twenty-one

His heart skipped. There was something she wasn't telling him. This was a confession.

'I love you... I don't know if I have said that yet.' She continued; when he said nothing but scanned her face for a slight change that she might be joking.....

But Amber didn't say what she didn't mean; she was not joking but something intrigued him.

'Did you ever stopped loving me?'

She smiled and pressed her body to his; raised her toes and kissed his cheek with the slowest motion ever before she whispered. 'No. I always have and I always will.'

His hand tighten their hold round her. She turned to look him in the eyes. She looked at his eyes , delicious lips; he could kiss like no other. His ticklish nose and his amazing ears. God had given her a beautiful husband, she couldn't be more grateful.

'Thank you. Nicholas.' She said quietly.

Nicholas raised his gaze from her lips to her eyes. 'What for, Amber?'

'For coming back to me.'

Rather he felt it was the other way; he appreciated her; for giving him another chance.

He felt his groin fight for release. It was incredibly that no matter what Amber did, no matter how little or small; irrelevant or not, it turned him on without much efforts and the funny thing, she didn't even do anything.

He pressed her to him but he needed to enjoy every talk, every affection to the fullest, beside they had the rest of their lives together.

He kissed the side of her lips and she closed her eyes to savor the moment.

'I was thinking; let's stay home today. We can do anything... maybe....' He didn't finish but winked at her.

Making her smile and giggle. 'I like to keep busy, Nick.'

'Really, Amber we can keep busy. It just depends on what you want us to do.' He smiled.

She looked at him for a moment and a wide grin on her face; thinking of what they could do while at home. 'I don't know but first....' She kissed his cheek again, slowly moving to his ears and she whispered; 'I didn't say good morning properly.'

Then he smiled as he drowned himself in her kiss worship.

The moment her lips touch his; he was a goner. He opened his mouth and allowed her entry, they didn't even hear when Lucky entered the kitchen.

'Are you guys forgetting there is a guest in your house?' He said with a smile as he went over to wash his glass.

Amber smiled and buried her face in his chest before Nicholas looked at him.

'Are you a guest, Lucky. I hardly agree.'

They laughed together; Nicholas still holding Amber. He was happy with her and he needed to remain with her.

Apparently after Lucky left for his office, Amber's phone rang while she was helping Nicholas with the potatoes.

She damped her hand on the napkin and picked her phone, since laughing at what Nicholas said.

'Hello.'

There was a pause.

'Hello.' She said again and just then a cold wind breathed on her face. She knew who was calling before he even introduced himself.

'Am, it's me. I am only allowed one phone call before my lawyer comes.'

She felt the urge to snap at him; maybe whatever he wanted to say was important; she'd let him talk.

He continued. Now, Nicholas was standing by the pan; looking at her and wondering why she was quiet; she knew that because she could read the air in between them.

'I am sorry about everything and I think you deserve an explanation. Can you come visit me, please. I have a lot to tell you.'

She was quiet, she wasn't even sure she wanted to see him right now.

'I want to tell you so much; I am tired of hiding anymore.'

When she heard the police officer telling him to wrap it up, she spoke.

'Fine, I am on my way.' She dated him for six months, understanding, kisses and comfort.....he had been patient with her, for that he deserved a listening ear.

'Okay.' Then he hung up.

She paused for a second before turning. 'I need to see Jake.' She said taking off her apron.

Nicholas moved to her.

'Amber, you are not being serious right now.' He said when she didn't speak immediately.

'Are you?'

She kissed him quickly. 'I am. He said he has something important to tell me.' She said as she hung the apron.

'We should get a lawyer... does he have to speak to you directly?'

She smiled. 'Yes, baby. Jake changes his mind easily.....who knows what he wants to tell me. I don't.'

That he loves her, he was sorry; all those things; Nicholas could just guess.

He sighed. 'I'll go with you, then.'

Amber opened her mouth to tell him; Jake felt threatened by him but he didn't let her.

'I won't do anything, I just want to know you are safe and out of harm's way. So that I can protect you.'

She moved close to him and touched his chest lightly. 'Nick, I don't want you to die for me.' Because everytime he said that; it felt that he could do more than protect her; if he hadn't received that phone call from Lucky; maybe her Nick would be in hospital by now. Which was the truth; she would love he moved on.

And then he told even the greatest truth. 'There is no meaning in my life without you.'

She looked at him; from the look in his eyes; he wasn't lying.

'I love you and we will leave together.' He said and moved over to the pan that was starting to burn the chips he was making.

She watched him for a while; Nicholas did love her; from earth to the heavens and beyond. She smiled.

The police station was sickening; she had never been here....or inside rather.

She had bailed Benjamin out from detention the day before their graduation and she had only waited outside.

But like they say; it is never too late to learn something new.

Nicholas walked beside her; when they entered. All eyes were on them; officers who spoke to others who came for complaint or bail; stopped their work for a few seconds to watch them.

There was nothing special about a couple in jeans holding hands but apparently this was everywhere; her eyes scanned the room; then she suddenly felt sick when the smell of cigarettes hit her nose.

God! What happened to the X sign that say no to smoking outside the station; she was about to look at where the stinch came from when she suddenly heard;

'Did you forget the sign outside.' A man with moustache and a cap pushed a guy forward that they had to move back, so that the guy would not hit them as he fell to the ground.

The guy looked at Amber and Nicholas and sheepishly smiled at her.

'You are pretty, will you marry me?'

Amber had to turn away because he reeked of both drugs, cigarette and alcohol.

'Take this guy away.' Nicholas told the man who was looking at them to see their reaction.

The man removed the human being from where they stood; they didn't even bother to look at where the officer took him.

And he came back, smiling. At what exactly; he and Amber wondered when they exchanged glances.

'Sorry about that. How can I help you?' He began; rubbing his palms together like he had just met the two persons that will make his day.

'I am here to see Jake Darnell.' Amber told the man; who removed his cap when Amber began to speak.

Nicholas looked at him angrily. 'What are you doing?' He asked when the man didn't talk for a minute.

'I am sorry but I can't help it. She is beautiful.' He expressed.

'Thank you and God help you; I don't have to remind you to do your job.' Nicholas returned.

Another voice saved the officer from replying Nicholas.

'Amber?'

They turned to look at the direction, Amber heard her name.

'James.' She recognized. She gave a small smile at the man; they were only on first name basis; she had met him concidentally and Jake had introduced him as his lawyer.

'Thank you, officer John.' He told the officer, who just nod and excused himself but not without looking at Amber again.

'He has refused to see me, until he saw you. Are you likely to press charges for harassment and forced entry?' Matthew diverted his attention from the officer to himself.

She looked at him; she wasn't the one pressing charges, it was her husband here because he didn't like the way everything went. 'Let me hear what he wants to talk to me about, then I think about it.'

Matthew nod and nod. 'Right this way.' He directed them to the left door and followed them in. They passed few more doors before they came to the door; which had a transparent glass. She stopped when she saw Jake seated and looking at the door.

'He is waiting for you.' Matthew told her as she hesitated.

She looked at Nicholas and smiled at him; assuring him, she will be fine; as if the man was unsure of himself; he kissed her and moved away from her; a man in suit came in through another door followed by two officers and then she noticed there was a microphone; they could hear everything that went on in that room.

She sighed and opened the door before entering. Immediately he saw her; he stood up and then the door closed.

Nicholas listened vividly as a man brought him a chair to sit that it would take a while, then he noticed the lawyer sitting; without much talk; he sat down and listened.

Amber walked to the table and took her seat and Jake sat.

'You can't even look at me now.' He started.

It made her raise her face to look at him. 'You caused it.'

'I'm sorry, Amber.... Really about everything.'

She didn't even know what to say.

'Am.'

She looked at him.

'Did you at a point ever love me; even though it wasn't as much as the love you have for Nicholas. Even though the tiniest bit?'

She sighed. She had told him already.

'From the first time I saw you, times I spent ..... I really did try to love you but I couldn't. I care about you...'

'How do you feel about me now?'

Really, he had to ask that? 'Disappointed.' In just one word.

He dropped the hands he had been rubbing on the desk.

'I am sorry, Amber. I thought I could be the only one for you. I love you so much, you don't know how.'

Why didn't he just tell her directly; he has never had the problem of expressing himself to her before.

'I wanted to protect you....'

'That was why you push me away before Nicholas came and when he came back, to protect me; I was willing to try to work us out...'

'You had already closed off your heart and when Nicholas came back; you were happy to see him; to be with him again.'

She looked at him. How could she not be happy; she thought he died and when he came, she didn't forgive him.

But she wasn't going to define her relationship with him.

'Why did you call me here, Jake?'

He looked at her; she thought he wasn't going to say anything but he did.

'To tell you the truth.'

She looked at him. Ready to listen because she had been confused about the Clinton, Gush had introduced.

'I had met you earlier before we met officially.'

She looked at him, confused.

'I was at your friend's wedding; Cassandra...we were introduced by one of her coursemates in school.....then you were with Nicholas.' He paused and smiled.

He scoffed. 'He didn't leave you for too long and he was always closeby if he left. He always looked at you when you weren't looking... and when you guys danced; you look so beautiful..... I wanted to have you with me.....'

'Stop gaping at someone else's wife, Jake. You don't have a chance.' Luke told him as he straightened his outfit; he had just finishing dancing with one of the bridemaids.

Jake looked at Amber again; she was smiling at what Nicholas said and she leaned to him as he hugged her in his arms.

'Any thing can happen.' He told his friend.

They had come to look for Gush; who was suppose to give them jobs.

By the time, he looked at the dancefloor again; Amber wasn't there anymore and neither was Nicholas.

After a brief meeting with Gush; who had said he would call them. He and Luke were about to leave the party for the club; before he reached the exit door; he stopped when he saw Amber's hair and stopped to look. Nicholas was kissing her and he imagined how Amber could make him feel with just a kiss.

When he had gotten to the club and the only thing he could think of was the insane feelings that was starting to arise in him, just thinking about Amber and the way she would kiss him.

Before the end of that night; he had gotten laid; with a sexy girl who gave him a blowjob and s** he didn't think would end but at the end when he finally lay on his back. The dark chocolate hair came swimming in his mind and great fantasy of what he'd do to her and for her if she was his and not the other guy's.

'Gush had seen me do a research on you; so he thought it would be a good thing if I am able to win you over and give you to him.... because he liked your profile. But I couldn't do anything until I could be with you; even then.....you were with Nicholas. When he left, I saw an opportunity.....'

'And became my friend.' Amber finished for him.

She had told him to leave her alone several times until; he showed up basically everywhere.

'I fell for you; the few days we hung out; you laughed again, you smiled more and then you kissed me. After everything.... I kept avoiding Gush seeing us together and few months; he kept asking if we should visit a particular house; it had been your parent's house; I gave different excuses and finally he forgot about it and few months later; Luke met you; I made him promise to not mention you to Gush and not frighten you away. That was why Luke acted nice and you liked him......'

'And then Gush showed up unannounced; we had parties and suddenly paid me a visit; that was why I pushed you out..... I didn't want Gush having anything to do with you. When I decided to apologize for how I behaved.....I found you and Nicholas together. But I honestly didn't know they followed me.'

One thing came to her mind everytime.

'What do you really do?'

'I teach.'

She shook her head. She didn't believe that.

He looked away for a bit.

'If you are telling me, the truth, Jake. I want all of it.' He should tell her; if Clinton was really his brother.

He sighed and nod and looked at her. 'I am not going to hide it anymore. I am sick of it.'

She wasn't sure; she understood what he said right now.

He sat back and looked at her. 'I was going to tell you at some point.'

'I use the teaching as a guise. We are involved in drugs.' He said when he didn't continue.

She looked at him; maybe he forgot they were listening to their conversation. He continued.

'Gush get the drugs and distribute to us to sell it to local users.....we never actually owned a place before; that was why Gush kept looking for ways to get one; whatever he liked; he paid for. The police found the drugs oneday; but we weren't caught. We robbed the bank few months ago and because I didn't like Nicholas.... I told him, we should rob his restaurant... that explained the safe; you saw in my room when you cleaned up my room.'

She was dumpfounded.

'I wanted out when I realized if you found out the truth; you may never forgive me. But then Gush got a new drug and asked us to taste it.....that was why I was sweating when I came in... I really didn't want to you get involved .....' He rest his hand on the table again and was about to touch her but she withdrew her hand from his reach.

'And your parents?' The same parents, he told her; they lived in the coast and he visited once a while.

He sighed. 'They are dead; four years ago.'

She shook her head and she believed everything he said.

'And Clinton?'

'He is not my brother. I am an only child.'

Amber stood up; she didn't believe this. To think she believed everything he said.

Jake stood up too. 'Amber.'

'You robbed Nicholas of his mother's painting and pulled him to loss, because you wanted him to leave me alone? Jake!'

He began to move towards her. 'Amber, I am sorry. That is unreasonable, I should have channeled my anger somewhere else....if I knew you'd act like this.'

She breathed. It had happened, Nicholas was going to move on, what would happen now?

'I wish you you haven't gotten involved in it in the first place; I wish you had stopped; you robbed a bank for God sake...'

He touched her hand. 'Amber, I made a mistake but I do not want you to see me differently. I love you and if Nicholas never came back; maybe I would have gotten a chance with you.'

Amber looked at him; now there was no chance.

'What is going to happen now?' She said calmly. The deed had already been done. She couldn't change the past.

He dropped his hands from hers. 'I don't know but whatever it is I am going to face it but I need you to promise me something.....'

She didn't believe her ears; he still wanted her to have her word concerning what now?

'We will still be friends.'

Friends? She didn't think they would be anything after he tried making her husband poor and turning him almost into depression.

'Why?'

'You are the only one who really knows me.'

The door opened and four persons barged in; three officers and the man in the suit she had seen earlier before she came in.

'I promise but you need to change.' There was no way; she could be friends with him; with this information now. He takes drugs and could rob more than a bank. If he could dropped all these, they could be friends.

He smiled as the police officer reached him to handcuff him.

'I will.....did you forget I said prison is like therapy?'

She nod her head and they held his hand.

'You are under arrest, Jake Darnell for the robbery, attempted murder of Mr. Rocky Stone, for harassment and forced entry.' He told Jake who just looked at her.

'You have the right to an attorney, if you do not have, the court is reliable to provide you with one. You have the the right to remain silence; whatever you do or say now will be used against you in the court of law.' He said and then gestured for them to take him away.

They took him out of the room and allowed him one more glance at Nicholas; he was about to leave when he asked them to wait.

'Nicholas, you better keep her happy....if not.....you know what prison does to a person; I will make your life a living hell...But just be ready; I will take care of her when you are gone.'

Nicholas just smiled at him. 'I don't need you to take care of Amber..... because I am not going anywhere.' He returned.

They both looked at each other for a few seconds before the police officers pushed him out.

Nicholas went to Amber; who just smiled remembering the conversation they had about prison.

She was sitting on the couch and her legs on his laps; they were watching; THE ESCAPE; Jake had just told her; that the police officer can easily be bribed to release one.

'There are some good officers of the law.' She told him

'You know what I think about prisons?'

Curious of how someone had a particular thought on prison. 'What?'

He smiled. 'Prison is a place where a person is being confined to; surrounded by walls and iron bars. The wall is not breakable without having to alert the next prisoners, or the guards.'

She looked at him, listening.

'In that little space, you are left to feel nothing but your heartbeat and when it rises and how loud it is. Then you hear the water going down each toilet and flies flying around you; you hear impatiently mosquitoes waiting to feast on your blood but then you think about these things as you shut your eyes; maybe your neighbor is impatiently picking on you or teasing you.' He paused.

She looked at him; 'Have you ever stayed in a prison cell before?' if he knew all these.

He smiled. 'Detention actually. I was Sixteen, Luke bailed me out.'

'What did you do?'

'I smash a man's car windows.'

But she didn't ask him why.

'So, prison is a therapeutic process; practicing patience with the annoying beasts, terrifying characters and the ones who is left to intimidate you.'

He had explained. But look here; who ever thought; he would actually go to prison.

He probably did; she thought.

'Babe, are you okay?' Nicholas asked her.

She looked at him; she smiled at him; they have done so much together. She touched his face lightly and kissed him tenderly, softly before she moved away from him; leaving him speechless.

If he was ever thinking of leaving; she would go with him.

Anywhere.

'I love you.' She whispered with a smile.

Confused. 'I love you too, Amber.'