CH 2.2 - Disregard (PU)

*cough* *cough*

"Master, you sound really sick. Do you want me to come over so I can take care of you?".

"No, there's no *cough* need, my baby".

Jaehwan frowned on the other side of the phone. He used to think that Shujin avoiding him was impossible but he might be wrong. "Are you sure, Master? I can drive over if you give me four hours. I can look after you,". Jaehwan rested his chin on the cushion he was hugging, sighing. "There's no need, my angel. I'll *cough* handle it alone,". Jaehwan hung up on him and pushed his face into the cushion, feeling as if he wanted to scream in frustration. He felt tears etch down his cheeks and he sniffled to himself.

Shujin had not been calling him for weeks now. In fact, Jaehwan was the one who constantly tried to get a hold of him when it used to be the other way around. Jaehwan felt his chest region throb painfully and hunched over, squeezing the cushion. 'It triggered..' He got up and hobbled over to the medicine cabinet before opening a bottle of his pills. He got a glass of water and he took one solemnly. His chest continued throbbing and the pain wouldn't cease until the medicine kicked in. He really felt like he was on the edge of his nerves. All he wanted to do was see his Master, to have one of their lengthy Monday night video calls again.

Jaehwan just scrolled up on the messaging app to see all of their older messages. Even though Shujin was strict and controlling with him, at least he cared enough to know if Jaehwan was safe or not. Seeing how quickly Shujin changed made him feel miserable and he knew he didn't change because of work. He switched off his phone and sighed, lying down on the sofa. Just at that moment, Aki had returned home with Asuna. She was allowed to sleepover because they were supposed to take her to Shiuma Park tomorrow. Asuna took off her shoes and she wanted to run up to Jaehwan to hug him but she was surprised to see him lying down, clutching at his chest in pain. "Jaehwan-Oniichan are you okay?!"She gasped. Hearing how panicked she sounded, Aki hurriedly took off his shoes before he ran to Jaehwan.

He could see how much pain Jaehwan was in and knelt by his side. "Jae, are you okay? Is your heart hurting you again?". Jaehwan turned to look at Aki's face miserably and nodded. Aki turned to look at the kitchen counter and noticed that Jaehwan's bottle of medicine was there. "Did you already take one?". Jaehwan nodded and shifted to his side, feeling the pain eat him up. Aki bit his lip and looked at Asuna. "Suna-chan, go wash up and change into your pyjamas first. I'll handle Jaehwan-Oniichan. Okay?". The little girl nodded and darted up the stairs with her small bag of luggage and Aki stooped to carry Jaehwan to their bedroom so that he could rest.

Aki was noticeably more worried about Jaehwan's health than ever. He seemed to be taking his pills more often than usual. (Jaehwan takes two pills regularly, one to 'lessen' the pain for whenever it comes the next time and one for 'almost immediate pain relief'. The one Aki's referring to is the second pill). "Jae, do you think you're healthy enough to go to the park tomorrow? If you can't we can just stay home with Asuna,"He whispered, holding Jaehwan's weak body close to him. Jaehwan nodded even though he was visibly in excruciating pain. "I-I'm fine. We..promised her,"He whimpered, skinny arms around Aki's neck as he was being carried up the stairs. "Yeah, we did. But your health comes first. If you're not fit to go, then we should postpone it to the end of the year holidays,".

Even though he felt like the room was spinning, Jaehwan was adamant. "No. She waited so long for this and even got good grades for this. She doesn't deserve to be punished for something I can't control,". Aki laid him down on the bed and tucked him in. He could see how pale and drained of colour Jaehwan had become and his eyes were watery. "If the light is hurting your eyes, I can turn on the bedside lamp instead,". Jaehwan nodded and the room was dimmed. Aki took off his coat and covered Jaehwan with it, leaning over to touch his forehead. No matter how much Jaehwan wanted to deny it, he looked ill. Aki could only pet Jaehwan to sleep quietly while he waited for Asuna to finish taking a shower.

"Niichan! Niichan! Look at my hair! It's becoming curly!"She exclaimed, running out of the bathroom in her pyjamas. "Shhh...Not too loud, Suna-chan. Jaehwan-Oniichan isn't feeling well tonight,"He chuckled quietly and hugged her. "Niichan, why is Jaehwan-Oniichan always sick?"She whispered, twiddling with a stray lock of hair. Aki sighed and pulled her onto his lap so that he could untangle her hair. "Well, he's chronically ill and has a weak immune system. But he chooses not to let that stop him from living,"He explained, trying not to hurt her as he tried to undo a knot in her hair. "Even I didn't know about his condition until his Master told me. He can't take excessive amounts of stress, fear or pressure or his chest region starts to hurt,".

Biting her lip, her eyes were limpid with sadness. Jaehwan had gone through a lot. 'It must be painful to be chronically sick. Jaehwan-Oniichan is a strong person'. Noticing how subdued his sister had become, Aki tickled her stomach and admired her beautiful tresses of hair. He hoped that changing the subject of conversation would make her happier. "So your hair is getting curly. Just like Sumi's and mine,"He smiled proudly, caressing her tresses of long chestnut hair, seeing the beginnings of a curl pattern. "What will my friends say about my curly hair?"She squeaked, ecstatic about her new discovery. "They'll love it. Trust me,". Asuna nodded and was about to brush her hair but Aki shook his head. "Try to brush your hair less, Suna-chan. It'll ruin your curl pattern,".

Asuna's eyes shifted nervously as a reply and put her hairbrush down. "But all my friends have straight hair though. I'm the only one who'll have curly hair,". Aki merely pulled her onto his lap and played with her hair. "Different is beautiful. Curly hair is beautiful. Straight hair is beautiful. Wavy hair is beautiful. Embrace what makes you unique to others, Suna-chan. You'll always be my beautiful, sweet, and smart little sister,". Asuna squealed in joy before she covered her mouth, making Aki laugh. The girl kissed her brother on the cheek, squeezing the life out of him. "I love you, Niichan".

Aki just held her close, smiling as he could tell that Asuna was growing up right before his eyes. "I love you too, Suna-chan".

________________________________

"Guess we'll have to change our plans for the time being,". So it seemed that Shiuma Park would be closed because of maintenance issues. Asuna did feel bummed but she remembered how much pain Jaehwan was in the night before and decided that his health was definitely more important. "At least Jaehwan-Oniichan gets to rest now, right? He was in a lot of pain yesterday. It would be good for him if he rested,". Aki nodded and looked at his partner, who was still asleep. Before going to bed, Aki stuck a cooling patch onto Jaehwan's forehead because it felt a bit warm. "His health is seriously so frail. So frail. He depends on his medication to live a normal and happy life too. I pity him, Suna-chan,"He sighed, braiding his little sister's newfound curly hair. "Well, shouldn't we make him feel better today?".

Asuna put on her socks and looked to Jaehwan, who was grunting in pain. "How can we do that?". She stood up, heading for the door. "Shall I fetch some water for Jaehwan-Oniichan?". Aki shook his head. "I'll do that. Watch over him please. I'll get his water and his medicine,". Asuna nodded and sat at the edge of the bed obediently. She flicked her braids back, craning her neck to look behind her. She saw Jaehwan clutching at his chest, groaning. "Is it still painful, Jaehwan-Oniichan?". He nodded quietly and she looked down at her feet. "I'm sorry I can't do anything to help you. I don't know how much pain Jaehwan-Oniichan is in so I don't understand how you feel,"She apologised, twiddling with her thumbs. Jaehwan smiled through the throbbing pain in his chest and tried to sit up. "It's okay, Suna-chan. I was born like this. I'm used to it,".

The little girl pouted, hugging her stuffed animal that she had brought with her. "Jaehwan-Oniichan doesn't deserve to be in pain. You're such a nice person,". Jaehwan grunted from the pain in his chest but he motioned for Asuna to come closer. The little girl sat next to him on the bed, clearly unhappy that Jaehwan was suffering so much. He patted her on the head tenderly, trying to play with her and her stuffed animal while he waited for Aki to come back. "Is this a Shiuma? My friend has one too,"Jaehwan asked, trying to divert Asuna's attention away from himself. "Yeah! My Shiuma's name is Murasaki! Niichan got her for me when I was 9,".

Gabbling about her stuffed animal, she kept Jaehwan company until Aki arrived minutes later with a bottle of water, a sandwich and Jaehwan's medication. "Suna-chan, you're going to give him a headache if you babble that much,"He huffed, setting the tray down. "No, I asked her to talk to me. It's okay,"Jaehwan croaked. Aki helped him sit up before he took Jaehwan's temperature again. "You've got a mild fever. You should get some rest. If you need your doctor, just tell me. I'll get your Master to send her over,". His partner nodded and just held his head. "Thank you, babe. I just feel so dizzy now. Suna-chan, we're so sorry. Your Niichan and I were supposed to fulfil our promise of taking you to Shiuma Park today,"Jaehwan huffed, a guilty smile masking his face. The girl shook her head, hugging Jaehwan. "It's not Jaehwan-Oniichan's fault that the side effects of the medicine are so strong".

Whimpers could be heard from Asuna as she shrunk in Jaehwan's skinny arms. "Suna-chan? What's wrong?"Aki gasped, sitting next to her on the bed. He pet her back gently, biting his lip. "We're really sorry that you couldn't go today. We really are. Next time, we'll take you to see Shiuma and the Ice Palace-"He tried to console her but she began bawling even harder. "I-I'm not crying about the trip,"She sniffled, wiping her eyes. Jaehwan handed her a tissue and mopped up her face. "What's the matter, Suna-chan? When you cry like that, it makes me sad,". She looked at Jaehwan and then the bottle of medication and then back to Jaehwan. "S-Seeing Jaehwan-Oniichan suffer so much makes me unhappy. He's been nothing but nice to everyone around him!"She wailed, tears streaming down her small face.

Tissues dabbed at her glassy eyes. "He doesn't deserve to be in pain,". Aki huffed and carried his sister, patting her on the back to calm her down. "I'll take her out of the room, okay Jae? You can manage right?"He whispered and his partner nodded in response. "Take your time Kiki. I, myself, feel bad for Suna-chan too,". Aki waved goodbye to him and brought Asuna to the living room, kissing her on the head. "Suna, it's okay to feel sad because of someone else's misfortune. But, life is just unfair like that,"He muttered softly, letting his voice pierce the silence of the house. "You could be the nicest person in the world and yet, you'd also end up being one of the unhappiest people in the world too. It's how life works,". Asuna sniffled, wiping her tears with the damp crumpled up tissue in her hands. "It's just that..Jaehwan-Oniichan is always nice to other people. Why is he being punished?".

Handing her another tissue, Aki stroked her head tenderly as he mopped up her face. "Well..some things just aren't distributed fairly in life. Like wealth and in this case, misfortune. That's why there's such a thing as poverty and the elite class of people,". She shook her head, looking at her brother in the eyes. "That's so unbalanced,". Aki hugged her tightly and sat her down next to him, adjusting her skirt so that it covered her legs properly. He reached underneath the sofa and retrieved a blanket that had been folded neatly. Jaehwan got cold quite easily so he stowed a few blankets underneath the sofa for anyone who felt cold while visiting. Aki covered Asuna's legs with the blanket and continued speaking.

"Well, since life is so unbalanced, we have to find different ways to balance it ourselves. In Jaehwan's case, he's born with a condition that caused him a lot of pain. Yet, he chooses to balance that misfortune out with other positive things in life,". He put a cushion behind Asuna's back and smiled. "Eventually, when you find the right balance, life will reward you for your efforts. Of course, not everyone is victorious immediately but with time, everything should fall right into place,". Asuna listened to whatever he had to say. She knew that this was no laughing matter.

"Niichan, is it possible for him to get well soon?"She asked, genuinely curious about Jaehwan's illness. "Well, for him to completely be cured is a miracle. But, he'll return to good health soon,"Aki sighed before he turned to Asuna, pulling his phone out. "Let's try to make something delicious for Jaehwan to eat,". Jaehwan hadn't had much of an appetite lately. But perhaps a round of crispy jeon and delectable side dishes such as stir-fried anchovies and steamed eggs would whet his appetite. Asuna was thrilled at that idea and helped Aki with whatever she could. Her older brother could tell that Jaehwan had become depressed because of how neglectful Shujin was being. It was almost enough to put Aki on the hob.

Large hands rapped on the door to their bedroom quietly. "Babe, I made all your favourites. You need to eat something before taking your medicine,". Jaehwan sat up and groaned, smiling as Aki pecked him on the head. "You've still got a fever. Sleep after you eat your medicine,". Jaehwan smiled through the dull pain in his chest. 'He took the time to prepare these for me. I should eat well,'. Sinking his teeth into his favourite Korean comfort food that had been prepared with love helped him forget about his aches and pains. Aki watched him eat, holding his weak hand. It didn't look like Jaehwan's condition would improve anytime soon. He'd have to call Jaehwan's doctor.

Except there was one problem.

Shujin was the only person with her number.

________________________________

"Sir? It's me, Nakanishii-kun. I'm calling about Jaehwan. He's been ill for the whole day,".

A grumble was heard on the other side of the phone before a low and almost threatening voice boomed a response. "What? Why did you have to call me now? I'm in the middle of something,".

Aki tapped his foot on the carpeted floor. Sure, Shujin was impatient. He knew that. But really? At such a critical time, he didn't even try to acknowledge that Jaehwan was ill? "Sir, he can't even move from the bed. I'm afraid you'll have to send his doctor over,". There weren't any responses for a while. The only things Aki could hear were faint whispers from another man. He assumed that was Shujin's butler and waited for them to finish murmuring among themselves. "I'll give you her number. You'll have to book the appointment yourself as I don't have the time for this,".

That just rubbed Aki the wrong way. What? No time? Not even five damn minutes to spare to help his darling see a doctor? To be frank, he was annoyed that Shujin wasn't doing much more than he probably could. "Sir, don't you think you should be the one to handle booking the appointment? I don't even know her name or her rates. I'm sure she's more familiar with you-"He sighed and heard Shujin slam a hard surface, most likely his desk, on the opposite end of the phone. "Look, you already have her number. Ring her up and ask. Charge it to my card, I'll give you the details to that as well. There. Anything else?". Aki dared not say anymore.

There was a long pause between the two of them before he finally found the courage to speak up. "Sir, are you going to visit Jaehwan? He hasn't been seeing you much lately. He misses you, you know. I know that work is one of your priorities in life, but didn't you say Jaehwan was your first priority?". Shujin huffed loudly and you could hear him put the pen he had been writing with down. "You're quite persistent, aren't you? You already got what you wanted. Hang up,".

Shujin had no interest in Jaehwan, as far as Aki could tell. That really dampened Aki's mood. He heard the receiver click and looked to Asuna, who had been doing her homework in the dining room. She locked eyes with him and waved brightly, holding up her exercise book proudly. He put on a smile and sat next to her. "Aren't you a smart girl?"He laughed as he looked through her book. "I guess I don't have to worry about your grades any time soon,". She stretched her arms out and yawned. "Niichan, I'm sleepy~". Aki ruffled her hair playfully and led her to the sofa so that she could take a nap.

Down in the dumps, he called the number that Shujin gave to him. The female doctor introduced herself and Aki could hear a thick Korean accent covet her speech. "I'm Dr. Yoo Eun Mi. Nice to meet you,". He looked to the bedroom and headed there instead, deciding that it would be better for Jaehwan to talk to his doctor himself. "Jae, your doctor's on the phone. Are you in the right condition to speak with her?". His partner sat up, a weak smile concealing the pain his body was in. "Is it Dr. Yoo? I'll speak with her,". Aki set the call on 'speaker' mode and put his phone on Jaehwan's lap. He sat on the edge of the bed and heard them chatter in fluent Korean.

Seeing how happy Jaehwan was to be conversing in his mother tongue, he did feel bad that he barely knew any Korean at all. The most he knew was "I love you" and "It hurts" but the only reason he could recognise those two phrases were because Jaehwan used them frequently around him. Still, he did wish he could speak Korean more fluently. 'I do want to be able to talk with Jaehwan like that. He's already well versed in my culture, I should at least know how to speak in his language properly'. Jaehwan wished his doctor goodbye and sank into the covers, elated. He handed Aki his phone and patted the spot on the bed next to him. "Babe, I love you,". He wasn't too confident in his pronunciation but when he saw Jaehwan's eyes light up, his imaginary puppy's tail wagged to-and-fro.

His pleasant yet hoarse voice broke out into a string of laughter. "Kiki, you really know how to make me happy. Yeah, I love you too,". Jaehwan was as happy as a clam, his skinny arms coiled around his partner's waist. "My doctor said she'll pop over tomorrow to check me up. It's probably prolonged because I've been under a lot of stress lately,". Bunching up the covers so that Jaehwan could keep warm, Aki cuddled with him. "When you get better, I'll take you out on a date. It's not good for you to be so stressed,". Jaehwan giggled and leaned into his chest. "I'll try to recover quickly then,".

Both of them embraced each other as the afternoon slowly shifted to the evening. Aki let Asuna watch the television as a reward for finishing her homework as well as to give himself some alone time with Jaehwan. He spent the rest of the evening asking Jaehwan about his culture and cooking for them. He was determined to learn Korean properly. It could be their secret language whenever they went out in public. The possibilities were endless.

On the other hand, Jaehwan was pleased that Aki wanted to dabble more in his culture when on the contrary, for most of his childhood, Shujin had been busy trying to erase it. Every last bit of it.

Every last bit of what made him him.