Do You Want To Live?

Maitho did not know how to explain the atmosphere in the car. No one spoke. But that was expected. There weren't a lot of words to express the end of a life, especially when such an end is inevitable. No amount of sympathy can lighten the air of doom that lingers in the mind every waking second.

But Maitho did not want the focus to be on his death. He had twelve days to figure out Cray's plans and the Norse pantheon's involvement. He wasn't going to spend those days endlessly trying to understand his fate. Maybe he might have time for that later. Maybe.

Questions tried to intrude into his thoughts. Would anyone remember him? If they did, will their memories of him be of fond nature? Will someone take the time out to give him a proper burial?

He focused on the passing objects outside his window. Cars. Buildings. Streetlamps. Yes, keep focusing on the mundane. Allow no distractions.

When his idea failed, he decided to block out the noise in his mind using his voice. He spoke. "I don't think Cray wanted me there simply because he hoped to include me in his plans."

For a moment, no one responded. He thought that they were all probably deep in their own reveries to give him much attention.

"What do you think he wanted, Maitho dear?" Quinn's voice broke out of the car speakers in response.

Maitho realized that of all the things that he would miss, Quinn's words of comfort would be the most. Never had anyone—or anything in this case—affected him so much in such a short span of time as a talking magical car.

At least that was an adventure he could tick off his not-yet-created bucket list. Talk to a talking car. Check.

"I think he wanted to show his might. The power that he holds. Right now, he doesn't just have an army and an absurd amount of resources and weapons. He has the Norse pantheon behind him."

"Sae ye're sayin whit? He callit ye for a big flex?" Epona had turned her attention from her observation of the outside world and to Maitho.

Maitho nodded. "And it's working. We don't stand a chance against him head-on."

"Didn't picture you backing away from a fight," said Brigid.

"As I said, we can't do anything head-on. But we're going to try other ideas." Maitho realized that he didn't take even the slightest offense at her jab. Either he was acclimated to her responses or it was a subconscious sense of fatalism taking over his thought process.

"I kind of see Maitho's point," said Bevan, pinching his lower lip. "We barely managed to land a single hit on Raiden. I can't imagine the strength of Freya's Guardian. Or even worse, Odin's."

"Imagine their strength together," said Maitho. He considered the possibilities and realized that they needed to match the Norse pantheon's might, at least to a certain degree. Right now, they were clearly underpowered. And outnumbered. "Don't you guys have allies? People from your pantheon?"

The team's reaction dropped Maitho's hopes lower. They looked at each other as though they had bad news to share, but weren't sure who was supposed who would take the responsibility of sharing. It suddenly made him pause and wonder why he hadn't seen anyone else from the Celtic pantheon around the three members he already knew. Four, if one were to count Quinn. Even though he wasn't a Guardian, he could be considered one with the number of times he has helped them out already.

"A think whit ye neit tae dae is pay attention tae yourself. Stop talkin tae us aboot our pantheon." Maitho was taken aback by the slight venom in Epona's voice, but she had already turned her attention outside, signaling the end of the conversation.

"I couldn't agree more," said Brigid. She sounded like she was happy to have someone on her side against her never ending quest to antagonize Maitho.

"Destination in twenty-five minutes," informed Quinn, bringing a much better ending to the conversation.

Bevan suddenly perked up. "You know, we haven't actually decided how we're going to approach Jennifer. I don't think we can just walk up to her and say if she could tell us all about her intimate secrets."

Maitho exhaled quietly, relieved to be able to focus on a different problem. He had already given some thought to the upcoming situation. "According to Cray, she is an active member of an MLM group. That's Multi-Level Marketing. It's a bunch of snake oil salespeople that prey on the desperate and poor."

"We know what MLM is," said Brigid.

Bevan looked at Maitho in the rearview mirror. "He told you that?"

Realizing that he hadn't actually mentioned all the details that Cray had offered him, he briefly covered all the points of the conversation to the team. They listened intently, only interrupting him to ask a question for more clarification. When he was done, Bevan blew out his cheeks. "That is. Wow. I don't know what to say to that."

"You're not alone. I'm trying to process it too," said Maitho.

"So what's your plan?"

"Well, if Cray's information on her is true."

"If it is true," said Brigid.

Maitho shook his head. "I don't think he would lie about that. Especially about something we could verify ourselves. After all, he knew Jennifer was your next mission Brigid. He would have to know you would try to investigate her."

"Sae whit dae we dae?" Epona asked, impatience lacing her voice. Maitho wondered if that was because she was reacting to him or if she was genuinely unwilling to wait for the information.

"MLM marketing is similar to sales," said Maitho. "The more people you reach out to, the more chances you have of finding a desperate victim. So what is the one way to speak to multiple people in a short span of time?"

Brigid answered a couple of seconds later. "Talk to them in a group."

"Exactly. Because of the number of people the marketers talk to, I don't think it is easy for them to remember all their names. Or faces."

"I see where this is going," said Bevan. "You're going to pretend you were part of her meeting."

Maitho nodded. "It should work."

The rest of the ride continued in contemplative silence. Quinn turned on the radio to a local deep house station. "It'll calm your nerves," was his response to the question on everyone's minds.

When they eventually arrived at their destination, Maitho noticed that they were surrounded by high-rise apartments that probably had a rental scheme that would need a year's worth of savings to just make one month's payment. When Maitho was about to step out of the car, he heard Epona's voice stop him. "Ye guys gae on ahead. A want tae talk tae Maitho."

Bevan and Brigid shared a look and when they looked to their remaining member for confirmation, Epona spoke again. "A'm juist havin a talk, for godsakes."

After sharing one more look, the duo in the front two seats of the car exited. They met up in front of the car and through the windshield, Maitho saw Brigid say something and Bevan shrug.

Maitho faced the woman sitting next to him, giving her his undivided attention.

Epona took a deep breath before starting. "I'm sorry a spoke tae ye like that earlier. If a really want tae dae it again, it'll probably be whan we're alone. Maybe wi the exception of Quinn here."

"I appreciate the vote of confidence, my dear," said Quinn. Maitho thought he heard a sense of pride in his voice.

Maitho didn't know where the conversation was going, but he decided to exercise patience. "I'm not going to say I was okay with what you did," he said. "But I can try to understand. You had to have a reason."

"A dae, but that's not the point right now." Epona closed her eyes for a moment. When she opened them again, her gaze was hardened, as though she was accusing Maitho of something. "Whit the bloody hell were ye sayin back then, ye tool?"

Maitho blinked in surprise. Then he blinked again. "Uh. I must have missed something. I said a lot of things." But then it hit him. Her reaction. The reason for this private chat. He guessed what she was talking about.

"Ye did." Epona stared at him for a moment. "Especially aboot the part where ye think ye are dyin' anyways. Ye're actin like this daes no matter. Like the news of yer death is like knowin aboot the weather or somethin. Dae ye care aboot yer life sae little?"

There it was. Maitho knew that someone would approach him about what he had said earlier. He just never expected it to happen so soon. If he had a choice, then he would have preferred to leave the car at that moment. But then he realized that he would be running away from the conversation just for a short time. He would have to face it eventually. He took a deep breath before answering. "Look, I just got the news an hour ago." He searched his mind for the best way to continue. "I barely got the time to think about it. Right now, I just want to make sure that there is a remote possibility that Cray could be right."

Epona looked stunned. "Whit's thare tae bloody think aboot?"

"That's what I want to find out. Everything's happening so fast that I can hardly wrap my head around one situation before another appears."

"Ye're gaun'ae die," said Epona, emphasizing the word 'die'. "Are ye plannin tae philosophize death or something? Who cares aboot that?"

"Look," said Maitho, barely managing to contain the frustration from leaking into his voice. "Yesterday was supposed to be just another rescue mission. Turns out, there's an old man keeping tabs on me. As if that creepy situation wasn't enough, I got people who just walked up to me asking me for my help, only to end up treating me like crap the first chance they got."

Epona closed her eyes and sighed. "Believe me, a am gaun'ae regret that for a long while."

"I'm not here to make you feel guilty. But the fact still remains. It happened, and it was not a pleasant experience." Outside, Bevan had walked away from the car but Brigid remained close, often daring glances inside. "And then there was today. I just discovered that my life as a Guardian amounts to nothing more than a piece of a plan to control humanity, if what Cray said was to be believed. Now I don't know what more we are going to find. I need to figure things out."

Epona persisted. "Ye sound like ye are makin excuses tae avoid the real problem."

"I'm not avoiding." Even Maitho could hear the uncertainty in his voice. "I'm figuring out a plan."

"But this isnae aboot a plan. Tell me somethin. Dae ye want tae live?"

Maitho thought about the question. It was simple enough and there really were just two important ways to answer it. Yet he hesitated. He didn't know if he would sound convincing enough when he responded.

Before he could say anything, Epona spoke. "Dae ye really have tae pause for an answer?"

"There is no easy way to answer that question."

"Ay thare is. Dae ye want tae live?"

"I can't say right now."

"Yes or no. Dae ye want tae live?"

"Repeating the question won't make a difference."

"Yes or no, Maitho."

"I don't know," snapped Maitho. He took a deep breath to compose himself before continuing. "I really don't know. And I wish it wasn't the case. I wish I was certain about wanting to live."

The silence that filled the car was like a heavy presence. Maitho could feel himself seeking more air. He had the sudden urge to step out of the car and inhale as much oxygen as his lungs could allow.

"Whit happened tae ye Maitho?" said Epona. It wasn't meant to belittle him. It was a genuine question.

Maitho didn't answer. Instead, he opened the door. "I think we have made them wait long enough." He stepped outside. He took a moment to breathe in the air, feeling the claustrophobia that had settled earlier slowly dissipate. He patted the roof of the car. "Thanks for not interrupting, Quinn."

"You will eventually come back to that question, dear," Quinn's voice emanated close to Maitho so that only he could hear it. "Yes or no. Make up your mind soon before it's too late."

Maitho gave a quick nod. For some reason, he knew that the car noticed it. He closed the door and looked across the roof at Epona, who had exited the vehicle on the other side.

Together, the two made their way towards Brigid. "I'm glad you guys didn't decide to take any longer," the leader of the Celtic team said. "We noticed Jennifer on her balcony. She's definitely at home. Time for a house visit."