I wake up to the sound of the rain scattering on the windows outside. I rubbed my eyes and looked at my phone and it read 7:42am. Oh, great, I didn't want to be up that early.
I look down to my torso to see that Maisie had rested her head there and stayed in the very same position she was in last night. I let her rest there as I didn't want to wake her up, she looked really cute asleep with her arms wrapped tightly around me.
I was lost in my thoughts about the last couple of days as I hear her yawn softly and stretch a little. I must say my hotdog was growing a couple more inches every time she'd look at me and bite her lip.
"Fuck." I mumble.
"What's wrong?" She smirks and bites her lip, looking at me. "I know we're only best friends, but would it be wrong to pleasure you and give you the pain?" I ask her, she gave me a small smirk, before climbing onto my lap.
"This is what best friends are for." She mumbles quietly. I can tell by her facial expressions that she definitely wanted to be much more than what we were.
"Hey." I say.
"Look at me." I instruct her. Sadly, she doesn't and I feel like I've hurt her, in a way I have.
"If we could date without it being weird, you know I'd ask you out in a heartbeat." I confess.
"No. All I'd be to you is another one of your pathetic conquests." She argues back. "I'll get dropped when you find someone better." She looks away from me.
I turn her head gently so now that we're facing each other. I let my thumb drape over her small lips and something inside me tells me to just kiss her.
I lean in and press my lips softly against hers. She is shocked but she doesn't allow it and pushes me away.
"Excuse me?" I question, looking at her.
"You're not good for me." She tells me and I knew that was true but nothing was stopping her having my hotdog in her bun.
"It hurts being let down, doesn't it?" She asks. I can't believe she would do this to make me understand how she felt when I turned down to have sex with her.
She gets up from the bed and goes to her room, doing her daily routine and she leaves for work.
I message anyone I could to come over, I needed to sort myself out, if you catch my drift.
Within a few hours, a girl named Nora came over. She was one of my former conquests. She was almost good at everything..
I open the door and greeted her as I let her in and closed the door.
"We have to be quick, Maisie will be home soon." I inform her and she sneered at me. "Since when did you follow rules and cared what she thinks?"
"Well she is my best friend and this is her flat." I answer her back. Nora looks at me with puppy dog eyes, and to be honest, I fucking wanted her.
"Ready?" I ask her.
"As ready as I'll ever be." Nora mutters. She closes the door shut and locks it. She giggles as she comes over and sits on my lap.
She places her lips onto my neck as she sucks it, leaving dark hickeys there. Her lips move down to my torso. "You're a fucking tease." I whisper to her and she smiles smugly.
She gets off my lap and tugs at my pants, undoing the zipper. "These, they must come off." She says as she licks her lips.
"Are you objectifying me?" I ask her as I wink at her. "Indeed I am, Brady. Indeed I am." She laughs.
She throws my pants to the floor and takes off my shirt, so that I'm only in my boxers at this moment in time. My finger trails up her shirt and drapes over her bra straps before I unhook her bra and take it off of her along with her shirt. She climbs on top of me again, she puts her arms around my neck as I massage her ass. I'd say it's 100 pounds of pure natural beauty.
She moans quietly as my hands roam her ass, she leans in and crashes her lips onto mine. I don't date, I never have and I don't think I ever will. My hands move up to her face as I cup her cheeks in my hands and she tugs at my bottom lip.
"Brayden? I'm home." Maisie calls out. "Shit." I mumble. Nora pulls back and looks at me. "Why do you care about her finding out?" She asks me.
"Cause she's say that going back to the past is stupid." I tell her harshly.
"So, I'm just a piece of your past to you?" She asks me and we'll basically she was but I was craving someone.
"That's right."
"You only want someone when you're lonely, Brayden." She argues with me and she gets dressed.
"You will never change. You aren't capable of love. Crawl back into the gutter where you came from." She spats at me and I sit up. Uh, what now?
I get up out of bed and I smash her against the wall. "We both know you can't resist me, you fucked me for nearly two years, Nora." I say, smirking at her.
"Brayden?" I hear Maisie say again. Nora walks close to me and looks into my eyes. "And those were worst two years of my life." She snaps and unlocks the door, walking out of it and walking out of the flat.
"What was that?" Maisie asks me, and I don't say a word. I'm slightly embarrassed that I'm going back to my old ways again.
"You told me you wouldn't be involved in another fuck and drop." She shouts at me.
"Things happen." I say bluntly. "It won't happen again." I mumble and she sighs.
"The only person you'll be hurting is yourself." She notifies me and she was right. Let's be honest, I can't keep a commitment to save my life so a fuck and drop is the next best thing.
"I can't have you here if you're going to bring random girls to my home, Brayden." She utters abruptly.
"It won't happen again." I apologise.
"You and I both know it will happen again." She suspires.
"You can't keep doing it. No one will trust you." She is truthful and tells me everything I need to hear even if she says it a bit harshly.
"You have one more chance. Don't wreck it." Maisie says plainly.
"So, is this the moment where I ask if we can throw a party this weekend?" I ask with a smirk.
"Are you fucking kidding me?" She shouts. I knew that she was joking as she was trying to hold fits of laughter in.
"I guess we can." She says and gives in.
"Great. Thank you, thank you." I say, thanking her. She goes to her room and gets into some loungewear.
I walk to the kitchen and open the cupboards finding liquor and drinking it from the bottle. It's addicting. However, I don't want to fall back on this, I want to find a love that consumes me, that I can be addicted to. I want to find someone who will be my muse.