Ch. 31: Cairen

Even if the guards hadn't stopped at one of the few entrances into the palace that was as sprawling as a city, Zhao Suiyan would have realized it when she crossed. The air simply felt different, slithering in when the curtain window flapped with each step and carrying hints of hope and despair, hand in hand.

She could never go back. But ever since she undid the first knot holding her top together, Zhao Suiyan knew she was set on her path to remain in the palace. Still, sweat pooled in her hands, bringing her to clutch her skirt tightly. Thus forth, she was Zhao Cairen and no longer the Second Miss of the Zhao family. She was the emperor's woman in name, and soon enough, in body as well. The young, newly appointed cairen squeezed her eyes shut, bringing her mind back to how the candlelight in the room had flickered off the emperor's gold uniform and the way their eyes had connected across the room.

Did he remember it too?

The glee all young girls enjoy in the spring of love bloomed within Zhao Suiyan. That night, she had pulled out all the stops, curving her waist just so, so it would appear even smaller in the emperor's eyes. On her gentle, curved eyes, she had specially applied makeup to make them appear more tantalizing, and she had blinked delicately at the bewildered emperor to create a picture of seductive innocence. Being confined by her family had also helped her skin's jade-like luster further accentuate, although the pink did not set off her skin's brilliance fully.

Zhao Cairen cleared her throat slightly and raised her voice so those outside the sedan could hear her. "Where are we going?" she asked after several minutes of walking. If she were still in Zhao Manor, the eunuchs had just walked a distance equivalent to the entire family home twice over.

Jin Xiu heard her and quickly relayed what she said to the sedan carriers.

"Zhongcui Palace," one roughly replied. Zhao Suiyan grimaced at her first obstacle, one she knew she would have to face ever since she had first heard the decree.

As a low-ranking concubine, Zhao Suiyan did not have to right to have her own palace and would have to be assigned to one of a higher-ranking concubine or consort. Perhaps assuming their sisterly relationship would help Zhao Suiyan, she had been arranged in Zhongcui Palace. The very place she had been humiliated and treated like a dog.

The grimace slowly carved upwards into a gruesome smile. She would repay her grievances with her sister one by one once she gained the imperial favor.

The sedan came to a halt once more and Zhao Suiyan held her breath in anticipation. She could no longer resist, a slender finger that had never seen a day of work lifting up the curtain window to see the brilliant red that she saw every night in her dreams.

"Zhao Cairen has arrived! Open the door!" One of the eunuchs said, raising his voice appropriately so those within could open it. There were gold bolts across the sealed red door, a signature of the palace. The eunuch beat a knocker the size of his head against the door, but after one minute of knocking, Zhao Suiyan understood. Her sister was not welcoming her into Zhongcui Palace.

"Open the door!" they repeated even louder. Passing servants on the far end of the halls cast curious glances at her but they all knew better than to involve themselves in the disputes between the masters within the imperial palace.

"Jin Xiu," Zhao Suiyan called within the sedan. "Tell them to let me out."

"Lower the sedan. Zhao Cairen wishes to exit," Jin Xiu ordered the eunuchs. Jin Xiu held back the curtain covering the entrance and Zhao Suiyan stepped out of the cramped space clutching onto her loyal maid.

"What's the matter?" she asked delicately.

One of the eunuchs answered apologetically. "Answering your highness, no one is answering the gate to Zhongcui Palace."

"Go try again," Jin Xiu ordered.

So the eunuchs had no choice but to knock even more passionately against the door until there was a little payoff. Movement could be heard behind the towering entrance before an unfriendly face popped out.

"The mistress of Zhongcui Palace is resting right now after serving the emperor last night. Do you know what kind of crime it is to disturb her rest? Please wait until she rises," he said skillfully before shutting the door again.

The eunuchs who had carried the sedan were all simple laborers who helped out with rough work around the palace, how could they dare knock further? Because of the generous amount Zhao Suiyan had given them before she had gotten on the sedan, they were at least somewhat helpful.

The eunuchs bowed towards Zhao Suiyan apologetically, mild panic on their faces. "Sorry your highness, we do not dare disturb the mistress. If you just wait, the door will open soon."

"En." Zhao Suiyan waved them off without a second glance. She knew very well that there was nothing more they could do. Besides, it was her move now.

Walking to the front of the gates of Zhongcui Palace, Zhao Suiyan lifted the silk skirt slightly before gracefully falling onto her knees in one motion.

"Your highness!" Jin Xiu cried, effortlessly switching to the palace-mandated term for all the emperor's women.

Zhao Suiyan shook off her hands. "Get down on your knees too. We shall stay as long as the doors remain shut to us."

Alone on her knees within the imposing red walls, Zhao Suiyan looked like a little flower blown along by unforgiving winds. It was a sight that would evoke pity in the naive and provide a handle for those who disliked the imperial concubine. After all, anyone who had grown up in the rear court knew how those who were favored were hated and schemed against more viciously than most.

As she thought of the shrew who had raged at her for taking an insignificant pair of earrings, Zhao Suiyan smirked slightly before falling back to her sorrowful expression. With such a personality, her older sister could not have very many friends within the imperial harem. Zhao Suiyan very much wished to pound her fists against the doors of Zhongcui Palace and utter foul curses, but her mother had reminded her a thousand times to curtail her overpowering rage.

Didn't Imperial Concubine Zhao like for her to kneel? Then Zhao Suiyan would surely oblige.

Such an arrangement proved to be successful for Zhao Suiyan. Not even a half a shichen later, the great doors opened again, this time fully. A eunuch with an unfriendly expression stood with his hands clasped behind his back, looking down on Zhao Suiyan.

"The mistress of Zhongcui Palace bids you entrance," he reported to Zhao Suiyan.

"I thank the Imperial Concubine for her grace," Zhao Suiyan answered, rising from the ground with a smug expression. Her knees only twinged slightly, but Zhao Suiyan made a great show of having difficulty rising to her feet.

Jin Xiu understood what her mistress was doing and cooed distressingly, "Your highness, are you alright? You are already so weak but your sister makes you kneel like this outside. She does not have familial affection for you!"

"Jin Xiu, be quiet!" Zhao Suiyan snarled appropriately. But it was all false bluster. If she had really wished to silence Jin Xiu, she wouldn't have waited until her maid finished speaking loudly for all to hear.

"My maid is young and too honest in her speech. Please forgive her," Zhao Suiyan said, shifting blame away from Jin Xiu and adding credence to the damning words of Jin Xiu. The Imperial Concubine Zhao was viewed as a fairy-like maiden who had been praised by the emperor for her kindness. If news of her forcing her sister to kneel were to circulate the palace, it would be the equivalent of slapping her sister in the face.

"You see, Older Sister?" Zhao Suiyan wished to say. "Look how I have learned. Watch as I take away the palace and the favor you have stolen from me!"

But she settled on waving at Jin Xiu to hand out some pouches of broken silver to the surrounding servants inside the palace. When Jin Xiu moved to hand it to the eunuch in charge, he backed away as if Jin Xiu help something dirty. However, Zhao Suiyan wasn't surprised. Naturally, a higher-ranking eunuch would be difficult to sway with a mere pouch of silver.

The eunuch led the way, leading Zhao Suiyan away from the grand main hall of Zhongcui Palace to her designated side hall, one of the four Zhongcui Palace possessed. A few eunuchs followed, carrying the few trunks she had brought of clothing, makeup, a pitiful amount of jewelry, and a hefty amount of silver.

When they entered, the thick dust immediately had Zhao Suiyan coughing hard.

"What is this?" her eyes narrowingly as she spoke harshly, breaking the veneer she had just established but she did not care. This slight was too large for her to handle.

The side hall was, in truth, in good condition. The furniture was not yet outdated and all accounted for. She spotted a luohan bed, a side table, and a few chairs for entertaining guests all to be what suited her current rank. However, the side hall had also not been cleaned in a very, very long time. Dust sat on top of the table like another layer and warped the colors of the pillow so the burnished brown was barely visible. Cobwebs hung from the ceiling like loose, fine hairs, tangling with the curtains and causing Zhao Suiyan to duck in some spots so they wouldn't touch her.

Even the oldest and most remote courtyard in Zhao Manor, although the furniture was very dated, was cleaned out at least once a month.

Zhao Suiyan shivered as she heard a bug scuttle somewhere, while the eunuch smirked at her reaction.

Zhao Suiyan noticed it. "You! You dare?" she yelled, pointing a finger in the eunuch's face. They had switched positions and this time it was the eunuch, no Imperial Concubine Zhao, who was gloating at Zhao Suiyan.

"Jin Xiu, hit his face!" she ordered, her face turning red under her face powder as she imagined her older sister standing before her.

But Jin Xiu was a servant not a master and she understood power dynamics far quicker than her mistress did. Zhao Suiyan was a cairen, a low-ranked concubine who had not been favored. Meanwhile, Imperial Concubine Zhao was grasped in the palm of the emperor and owned her own palace despite still not being a consort yet.

Jin Xiu remembered how Zhao Suiyan's concubine mother had once forced a new, unfavored concubine who was a little older than herself to wash her feet as if she were nothing more than a mere foot-washing maid. She understood that until one gained favor, a woman was worth little more than a maid, and this power dynamic would be far more extreme without the imperial palace.

"Your highness," Jin Xiu answered uneasily. Zhao Suiyan cast the same vicious glance she threw at everyone onto Jin Xiu and the servant girl cowered, but she did not move. Hitting the eunuch who ran Zhongcui Palace would be a certain way to ensure she would not live long or well in the imperial palace.

Unable to take it any longer, the new cairen stormed inside to the bed chamber, squealing as a cobweb brushed past her.

"May your highness have a comfortable stay. Her highness the imperial concubine said that she hopes you rest well and you may greet her tomorrow after you've given the empress tea." the eunuch called loudly after Zhao Suiyan.

"Thank you, eunuch," Jin Xiu replied weakly, using the polite term extended to higher-ranking eunuchs. "What may I call you?"

"Call me Eunuch Wang. Now go see to your mistress," he answered, pleased by Jin Xiu's deference. Eunuch Wang strolled out in a pleased manner, fascinated at how his mistress had been correct in how to handle her presumptive little sister. Jin Xiu bowed and hurried inside to where she'd seen Zhao Suiyan disappear until a blinding slap flew onto her cheek.

"What?! Now you listen to my sister like everyone else?" Zhao Suiyan's eyes were red-rimmed, her eyes viciously boring into Jin Xiu who said nothing and kneeled on the carpet before the bed.

"Your highness, please calm down," Jin Xiu begged Zhao Suiyan. Her nose tickled from the dust on the carpet and she sneezed loudly, reigniting Zhao Suiyan's ire.

"I've never suffered such mistreatment in my life. Find someone to lead us to the emperor! Let him decide for us!" Zhao Suiyan moved around Jin Xiu's kneeling body and prepared to march out of her filthy side hall.

"Your highness, no!" Jin Xiu yelled, completely at odds with her previous subservience, as Zhao Suiyan's words sunk in.

She wrapped her arms around Zhao Suiyan's legs and pleaded. Since they were young, Imperial Concubine Zhao had been skilled at getting under Zhao Suiyan's skin and causing her mistress to lose face in front of their elders. Of course, most of the situations began with Zhao Suiyan's provocation, but Imperial Concubine Zhao always walked away intact.

However, seeking out the emperor on her first day would do little more than make them a laughing stock among the palace servants and lose her respect in the eyes of everyone in the inner court.

"Your highness, how can you seek out His Majesty when your appearance is..." she deliberately let her words trail off so Zhao Suiyan would go see for herself.

On the vanity table, there was a smaller mirror, the kind that folded out of a painted box. Zhao Suiyan lifted it up, coughing from the flurry of dust that followed, and then gasped when she saw herself.

In such a short period of time, the two spots of dirt on her knees from kneeling had evolved into a streak of dirt on her face, a cobweb entangled in her new married woman hairstyle, and grime on her pale hands.

"How?" she screeched. Like most women in the harem, Zhao Suiyan knew that her appearance was the most important asset she had, and seeing her appearance so quickly marred frightened her.

"This is my first night with the emperor. Jin Xiu, quickly draw a bath!" Zhao Suiyan ordered. Jin Xiu breathed a sigh of relief since her mistress had forgotten her previous idea and went out to set up a bath. But who knew, that let alone finding hot water, even bringing a large wooden tub was impossible.

Zhao Suiyan had bathed sullenly and quickly in cold water while standing up on the pink wedding dress she hated, shivering slightly as Jin Xiu applied her makeup and did her hair.

"Your Majesty. Your Majesty. Your Majesty, you're here? Your Majesty, pay no mind to the surroundings. My sister accidentally forgot I was coming." Zhao Suiyan practiced speaking to the emperor, the soft and sweet tones startling Jin Xiu, whose cheek still smarted and ears still burned from the previous yelling.

But Zhao Suiyan waited and waited and waited. The pale, yellow light softly coating the interior of the side hall in gold deepened then faded to pitch black. She ordered Jin Xiu to turn on the candles, lest the emperor did not find her hall inviting and went to rest with her older sister.

In the side hall, Zhao Suiyan waited until dawn, when she finally understood.

The emperor was not coming.