Facing Reality

Their visit at the orphanage was short. Jesse didn't want to tire her out completely. They spent just under an hour playing with the orphaned girls and boys. But each moment there was more respect for Pearl.

Jesse watched her interact with almost every child individually and there was so much love on her face and in her actions that Jesse thought the kids were so lucky to be able to receive that attention.

He spent more time with the infants. One in particular, whose mother had been a drug addict. The four year old little boy gave his first smile of the day to the tall handsome doctor and, after a short conversation, became his shadow and faithful companion.

When Jesse first heard from the caregivers how Pablo had come to be in the children's home, a part of him had ached. He knew how much having no mother hurt especially at a young age. Having to struggle with health issues that came from being what people called a junkie baby, they hadn't expected him to survive but seeing him now, Jesse was aware what a little miracle the boy was. Without hesitation Jesse picked up the small boy and smiled before kissing his forehead.

Drawing back, he'd looked the infant in the eyes. Pablo's eyes had glistened but he managed a smile which had only widened when Jesse had smiled back. That is how they met and connected.

Little Pablo held Jesse's hand and watched him as he observed Pearl playing with the others. Every now and then Pablo would tug on his hand and point at something and Jesse would give him his full attention. He played Pablo's favourite game, which happened to be taking turns to put puzzle pieces in their right place. More than once, Jesse was totally endeared by the frown of concentration on the little boy's face.

When it was time to leave, Pablo had had a hard time letting go but Jesse promised he'd be back soon. Tears fell from the solemn brown eyes but the child didn't make a sound.

Leaning back against the seat in the car, Jesse took a deep breath.

"I'm not sure I could work with small children," he admitted.

Pearl reached out and squeezed his hand. "You did great."

"Yeah?"

"Yes. That's all those kids need… to know that they matter."

Jesse's eyebrows rose in acknowledgement but his heart felt so heavy. He was quiet the whole way back to the hotel.

He left her at her door and then said he was off to the gym to workout.

"Alright," she said, "I'll see you later then."

"Sure."

At dinner time, Pearl asked Jesse if he was feeling better.

Jesse looked across the table and shrugged. "I think so but I can't get Pablo off my mind. There's just something about him… and his story!" he shook his head. "I don't know. Being in the gym shook off the sadness but he's still on my mind."

"Maybe there's a reason," Pearl said quietly.

"Yeah? Like what?"

It was Pearl's turn to shrug. "I don't have an answer. Maybe God wants you to do something for him. What that something might be, I don't know."

"Hm."

"Try praying about it."

Jesse gave her a little smile. "Okay."

Pearl saw the funny look on Jesse's face but decided not to push it.

That night Jesse reviewed his day as he got undressed for bed.

His anxiety hadn't made a comeback. Pearl was out of the danger zone and he knew he'd reminded her to be more conscious of her body. He'd practically drilled it into her over the past few days. She wouldn't be taking risks any time soon.

As he folded his shirt in half and tossed it onto the chair in his room, Jesse knew his anxiousness had been replaced by another feeling. He didn't think this one had an element of foreboding but it did make him sigh heavily and worry his handsome face with a slight frown.

He was almost sure it had nothing to do with Pearl, although it had started when he was with her at the orphanage. As the thought became clear to him, one name came to mind.

Pablo.

Jesse threw the covers back and slipped into bed, mentally shaking his head. That kid would be on his mind for a while.

Two days after the first visit, Pearl and Jesse returned to the orphanage. It was their last day in Bolivia and they agreed that it would be nice to say goodbye before leaving for Brazil together.

As their car pulled up in front of the house, Jesse looked over at Pearl, who gave him a reassuring smile. They had spoken about Pablo over breakfast. Jesse didn't want to feel like he was favouring the one child over the others. Pearl had understood his perspective but had ended the conversation by saying, "Sometimes you can't help who you're drawn to. And it's okay."

Jesse knew that she still thought it was God communicating with him. He didn't want to dismiss it too casually but on the other hand he wasn't sure if he was ready to hear from the man upstairs.

Almost as soon as Jesse had stepped out of the car, the front door of the home was pushed open and a little person came hurtling toward him. Without taking time to think about it, Jesse crouched down and received the boy who greeted him with enthusiasm. Picking Pablo up, Jesse gave him a warm hug. The boy buried his face in Jesse's shoulder and held on for dear life.

Pearl watched Jesse as he let out a slight chuckle and said softly to the young boy in Spanish, "I told you I'd be back."

The little one was so overwhelmed that he let out a sob. That heart wrenching sound made both Pearl and Jesse frown. They exchanged a look then Jesse bent his head and murmured something to the boy, then pressed a kiss on his hair. Pearl moved around the car and the three of them went into the orphanage together.

The director was standing at the door. She had been the one to open for Pablo and now she just smiled apologetically and welcomed them in.

Despite his behaviour when they first arrived, Pablo didn't try to monopolise Jesse's attention or time. He did stay nearby, but he 'shared' his visitor with others. Over the next few hours, Pablo stayed with Jesse, seemingly happy to just be near him, occasionally touching him as if seeking physical reassurance.

Every now and then Pearl would see them talking to each other- one of them would be serious, the other would be smiling or the both of them would be laughing. On one such occasion they both looked at her. She waved at Pablo and he had clapped his hands gleefully, giggling. Pearl sent Jesse a quizzical look and had received his magazine cover smile and a small shrug.

After hours at the orphanage, it was time for the children to go to sleep. Not surprisingly, Pablo asked Jesse to put him to bed. Jesse had hesitated but after getting permission from the matron, he went upstairs with Pablo. Pearl went up with them, thinking back to the last little chat she'd seen the two having.

That one had been completely serious. Pablo had looked very sad and he'd looked gravely up into Jesse's face. Jesse had smiled but Pearl was able to tell that it had been hard for him.

Now, she watched from the doorway as the little boy and the doctor talked to each other on the far side of the room. Whatever Jesse was saying this time was making the little boy happy. He gave him one big hug and settled into bed. Jesse sat with him for a bit, nodded then stood up. As Jesse moved to walk away, Pearl could have sworn she heard Pablo say, "Adios papa".

The child's voice was so happy and sincere, Pearl felt a lump grow in her throat. With tears in her eyes, she turned away and went downstairs to wait for her companion. Jesse came downstairs a moment later, saw Pearl waiting and gave her an apologetic smile.

"Sorry about that," he said. "You ready to go?"

"Yeah," she said, "let's go before it gets too hard to leave."

So they got in the car and headed to the airport. A few hours later they were already in Brazil.