"Wrists"

"Fear is stronger than logic."

*

"Did you think of your brother when you saw me?"

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. I was never going to tell you that. I was always afraid of you getting it wrong. But I can't forget him. I can't forget him calling me my sister and kissing me."

"It's okay, Gwen. You can tell. I'll be your brother too."

After saying that, I kissed on both cheeks.

"My sister..."

I was smiling at her as she looked at me puzzled. She sat across from me and she smiled at me.

"When I was little, I thought you had the reincarnation of my brother. It was as if my brother came back as a red-haired girl after his death. How different! I have always been there for that. I always wanted to stay with you and just talk to you. You had something. With the energy you spread around and your knowledgings. I was more admired. Even though we were the same age, I was making myself smaller and making you my brother. When my family noticed this, I received a very long treatment. When I finally accepted you as you, everything was better for me... "

"Wow! Gwen, what have I done to you? I'm seriously sorry, I wouldn't want to come out in pain, but now the past is in the past. We have to look ahead, right?"

"Yes, yes. Let's look ahead. Well-"

"Gwen... I'm sorry. Please don't go further, okay?"

"Ah, well. But we'll talk about it in great detail soon... Okay?"

"Okay, okay... Let's go. The bell rings soon. Let's not be late."

We left the classroom and started walking down the aisle. When we saw the crowd ahead, it didn't take long to realize that there was a fight. The crowd opened when we arrived. Although I didn't understand why they were doing such a thing at first, I was speechless when I saw Dylan in a fight in the middle. When Dylan's and my eyes clamped, it didn't feel good to see his face bruised. When he was punched by the boy in front of him, the most handsome and stupid person in our school, he was slightly shaken because he was unprepared. Then he threw such a head at the boy that I could swear I heard the voice from here. When the boy collapsed, he came to me in two big steps and took my hand and started dragging me to the exit.

"Dylan! What are you doing? Why did you beat him? Where are we going? What about school? Dylan, you're hurting me! Answer me you crazy guy!"

"Elizabeth! Will you be quiet for two minutes? Or shall I shut you up?"

"You can't silence me!"

"I have too many ways to silence you..."

As Dylan's methods of silencing wandered through my mind, nothing but twisted and sadistic ideas came to my mind. I shook my head and tried to keep up with Dylan, as if I could forget the scenes that came to my mind.

"What happened? Did you scare?"

"What will I be afraid of you! Let's go quickly wherever we are going! I'll go back to school."

"What are you going to do with school while I'm here?"

I wanted to answer, but I just wanted. It was so obvious that he was having fun when I couldn't open my mouth and say a single word.

I didn't know where he was taking me. It was very difficult to guess anything about him. He was not certain what to do. This made me uneasy, but for no reason I also felt safe next to him.

He stopped suddenly and looked the other way in surprise. He frowned slowly and pulled me behind him. He wouldn't let me move as I wanted to see what was there. He was tightening my wrists so much that I was out of breath now and my fears surfaced. As I took a deep breath, I remembered that disgusting day I could never forget.

He noticed that my hands were shaking when he looked at me reassuringly. But right now I could neither hear him nor control myself. The face of the man I saw was still clear. I could never forget that face. I started struggling and crying at the same time. My head was numb and my body was on fire.

"I beg you let me go! I'm scared! Let me go! Don't touch me! Please... Let me go!"

I shouted so loudly that Dylan immediately let me go. The moment he left me, my eyes darkened and I fell to the ground.

*

I was in my room when I opened my eyes. The goddamn smoke was still in the air. Watching the smoke drift in the air, the door suddenly opened and Dylan entered. He was looking at me so regretfully that now I felt even worse.

"I'm sorry, Elizabeth. Really I… I didn't know. I didn't know you had a phobia. I'm so sorry..."

"Didn't they tell you?"

"They were going to tell, but I wanted to listen to you. I wanted to hear from you and feel your feelings. That's why I want you to tell me these."

I smiled at him no matter how bad a memory I was going to say.

"Well... but don't interrupt, okay? It's better for me to talk constantly, I guess."

He nodded, meaning okay. My forehead wrinkled as I tried to remember that day. When I remembered everything clearly, I started telling him.

"I had one of the most disgusting days of my life 4 years ago. School was over and we were going to walk to my house with Gwen. I told Gwen to go home because it was a bit dark and I could go home myself. At first she objected a little, but finally I convinced her. While I was walking down the street, I wouldn't look around much. I did it again. I did not look around, but when I heard a girl's scream, I looked up immediately and my brain stopped at what I saw. A man tied a little girl around her wrists and walked her around like a dog. All over the girl was bruised. When the man saw me, he rushed to me as he left the girl, but I could not even move from my place. He put me in the empty building next to me. I hadn't shouted. My body was stiff with fear. He got behind me and grabbed my wrists tightly. He squeezed me into the wall, just as he was going to undress me, I started kicking the floor. My hands were numb because of tightening my wrists. I could not move. My breath was so tight that I stopped breathing. There was a possibility that the man would rape me. But my brain only wanted my wrists to be released at that moment. 'Just drop my wrists!' my inner voice was saying. He dropped my wrists and looked at me like a maniac. He was still right at the bottom, I couldn't breathe. I pushed the man to the ground. I kicked him in the stomach the moment he fell. My eyes were dizzy. Blood came from his mouth while I was still kicking the man. When I saw the blood, I jumped out and vomited. The girl was still waiting there. I went over to her and untied her wrists. "

I blinked my eyes after I took a shaky breath. Dylan expected me to continue patiently, but I didn't know how to go about it. Some wounds had scars no matter how much time passed. And some wounds continued to bleed over the years.