I'm trying(3)

I'm trying soo hard,

Sometimes it feels in vain.

I'm trying to hide

My disgust and the pain.

For you, it felt perfect,

For me, it felt wrong.

You think I was weak,

I think I'm too strong.

Too strong to let you 

Walk all over me.

Too smart to know

All the things I could be.

I could've been happy, 

But you made me soo sad.

Too many times

I went crying to bed.

Not that you saw,

'Cause you're vicious and blinded.

You made me feel shame,

I went into hiding.

Hiding from you

And your poisonous words.

I paint my heart blue,

I'm changing the boards.

You've said what you said

And can't take it back,

I did what I did,

Now you're hating me, heck.

My heart seemed to crumble

Into thousands of pieces,

My mind stays intact,

I don't know, it suffices?

You loved me soo much,

And still brought me down?

What do I look like?

A fool, or a clown?

It stings when this life

Pays pain with more pain,

I tried to let you know,

Now stay in the rain.