Burgers (1)

I leave the engineers to Edward and leave the gym. That's my afternoon freed up.

I think it's time for an early lunch!

Burger day? Is that like the pizza day back when I was new?

Darwin still hasn't recovered from what happened with Jade?

Not even someone like Vespasian or Libra can stop him?

Scary…

I meet Navi outside the employee dining hall and as we enter I get to witness a true battleground. It's a slaughter with ketchup and bits of food flying everywhere around Darwin.

He's repeatedly grabbing the long iron skewers lying in front of him. The skewers are longer than he is tall and have about a dozen burgers skewered onto each of them.

Darwin holds the skewer horizontally and starts savagely chomping down on the skewers while rotating them. More bits of burger fly and Darwin stops for a moment to drizzle an unhealthy amount of ketchup onto the remains of the skewer as he continues to obliterate the skewered burgers.

Pata is furiously flipping patties, making burgers and skewering them onto more iron skewers.

"Can Pata even serve us anything while he is forced to keep up with Darwin's madness?"

"He's fine. Pata has a lot of tentacles and Darwin isn't even going full speed because he's trying to savor the taste."

"That's him trying to to savor the taste?"

"You should see him if he gets serious about shoving something down his hatch. He'd clean up that buffer of twenty skewers Pata made ahead of time in a few seconds. If that happened, we'd indeed not get a chance to order anything as Pata would have to shift all his tentacles and attention onto keeping up with Darwin."

Well, since Darwin is 'savoring' his food, Pata has ample time to take our orders. Navi asks for a three quarter hollow beef cheese combo and I just ask for Pata's recommendation.

"My Guy, I recommend all my dishes! None of them are undeserving of my recommendation. But since you have asked me, I shall make a recommended combo just for you."

Works for me. We take a seat and I continue to marvel at Darwin's ability to massacre those burger skewers. How is his weight not increasing to the point where the floor collapses? Even with an instantaneous digestion, the mass he consumes can't be eliminated, can it?

"You are underestimating the physics defying power of skills once they reach certain levels. Darwin's mass only changes if he wants it to. Otherwise it just doesn't affect him."

"Just how high level does a skill need to be for that to happen?"

"It varies based on the skill and the breadth of its application."

That tells me nothing but I suppose my question couldn't be answered in the first place since skills rarely conform to specific rules regarding their effects.

"Precisely."

Our burgers arrive and Navi's is… tall. It consists of three beef patties sandwiches by buns with four slices of cheese, one between each beef patty. Each beef patty is about two fingers thick, adding the buns on either side brings its size to a point where I don't think Navi can fit that into her mouth. The cheese is finely melted and spreads perfectly between the patties and the buns but where's the sauce and how the heck do you plan to eat that?

"Before I answer both of those questions you must promise me that you won't take my lack of proper manners the wrong way. There is simply no good way to experience this burger to the fullest while remaining lady like."

"Okay?"

Slightly worried, I watch Navi gently lift the burger with her fingers struggling to stretch from below to the top. Then, magically, the patties shrink together until they are only as thick as a single patty. Navi's hands can now easily hold the burger as she ravenously takes a small bite.

One second she takes a bite and begins to chew slowly and the next, her cheeks suddenly bulge and she quickly chews with gusto as pure ecstasy shows on her face. Watching Navi's cheeks bulge like those of a hamster while she happily chews on, I direct my eyes down to the burger. While the patties are still compressed by what must be space magic, I can see that each patty had a hollow space on the inside that was filled with a dark yet slightly reddish sauce.

This way of eating is… unique. But judging by the expressions of joy, pure bliss and ecstasy flashing over Navi's face, dropping her lady like manners must be worth it.

Twenty? You could just eat a few of them each day and there would be no problem!