Chapter 11

“I already clean the house and cook. It’s not like I have anything else to do all day. I tend to the flowers. What else is there?”

“Sometimes a person likes a good old fashion back rub or foot rub. Maybe you could draw me a bath,” Jesse grinned.

“A back rub? And what would that earn me?”

Jesse shrugged and said, “Depends on how long you did it.”

Renee shook her head and walked away. She would like a back rub and foot rub, too, but there was no way in hell she was asking him for one. Her feet were swollen and her back hurt from the pregnancy. Her belly was big now. It wouldn’t be too much longer and the baby would be here. What happened if the baby needed something? Would she have to barter for that, too?

“You don’t seem too interested.”

“I’m not. I shouldn’t have to barter for anything,” Renee snapped as she turned towards him.

She moved close to his ear and whispered, “You kidnapped me. You raped me and got me pregnant and now you want me to either screw you or do something else for you for me to be able to get anything at all. Who in their right mind would do that?”

Renee started to walk off but Jesse grabbed her arm and pulled her back to him. He had a look on his face that used to scare her, but now she was just bored. He wasn’t going to hit her while she was pregnant and they both knew it so that threat was out the window. She doubted he would do much of anything out of the way while she was pregnant. She still had a couple of months of freedom on that end. So, she was pushing her luck sometimes.

“That mouth of yours is going to get you into trouble one of these days. You won’t be pregnant forever and when you aren’t anymore, all of these times will be remembered,” Jesse whispered, threateningly.

“Yeah, I figured as much, but I just don’t care anymore. You’re going to do whatever you want whether I like it or not. I’m not running away because I believe you will do what you said you would, but other than that, I don’t have to care what else you do. You’re going to hurt me, so what? You were going to do that anyway. The doctor already said if you keep going with it that I won’t be able to enjoy sex. Hell, I’m just hoping it makes me numb to it all together so I can’t feel anything at all. No pain or pleasure. So, go ahead and keep going with it. It makes no difference to me because frankly, I’m tired of the threat of it.”

“Have you ever heard the expression that you catch more bees with honey than vinegar? The vinegar you put out sure isn’t anything I want. You keep saying you want me to be more compliant, but you give me absolutely no reason to be. And to be honest, I never will be. I am who I am and no matter how much you try, you won’t beat it out of me,” Renee snarled as she jerked her arm away from him.

Jesse was taken by surprise by her little outburst. It was like she was taunting him, but he knew that she wasn’t. She was just being who she was as she had stated. And she had just basically told him to fuck off, that she didn’t care anymore. She didn’t want to feel. He wanted to say he had broken her, but he knew he hadn’t completely broken her because she was still fighting him in some ways. He smiled as he grabbed her hand and laced his fingers through hers.

“Alright. Let’s go baby shopping,” Jesse said as he chuckled at the shocked look on Renee’s face.

He watched her as she tentatively picked out a few things for the baby. It was all clothes and diapers. Things the baby would need, not the things she wanted. He took her back over to the aisle she had originally been on and picked up the baby book and photo frame. He looked at her out of the corner of his eye and saw her looking at the ground. He put them in the buggy and saw her look at it and then back down at the floor with a slight smile on her face. He liked the smile. It looked good on her.

They went home and she took the baby book and the picture frame out. He watched her as she placed one of the photos in the frame and the other one in the baby book. She had a smile on her face as she lovingly put the frame on the nightstand beside the bed. She was a completely different person when it came to the baby. He found that he was a little bit jealous of the baby. He wanted her to treat him that way as well.

She had said something in the store that had attracted his attention. The old expression of attracting more bees with honey than vinegar. And that he gave her no reason to be compliant. If he continued to threaten her to keep her in line, she was more likely to lash out. If he was nice to her, then she would be nice to him. That was what he had gotten out of it. He had bought her the things she wanted and she had been nice on the way home. He had talked to her and she had actually talked back. They had a conversation which they hadn’t really had before.

He watched her as she picked up a pen and started writing in the baby book. No doubt filling it up with everything that had happened before. He watched as she flipped back to the beginning of the book and bit her lip. She was deep in thought as he walked over to look at what she was looking at. It was the first page where you put the baby’s name. He hadn’t even thought about naming the baby. He hated that the baby would have to take on the fake last name that they had. He wondered if she had any thoughts about what to name the baby.

“Do you know what you want to name the baby?” Jesse asked.

Renee looked up, startled by his question. “Yes. I would like to name him Christian Alexander.”

“Sounds good.”

“Are you going to let me name him?” Renee asked, surprised.

“Honestly, I hadn’t even thought about names. That name sounds like a good, strong one. You have to remember to put your other name on the birth certificate.”

Jesse watched as her face fell. She closed the baby book and put it aside, no longer wanting to fill it out. She laid on the bed and placed her hand on her stomach, closing her eyes. He sighed and walked out of the room as he heard her begin to cry. One step forward, three steps back. She’d come around eventually. He’d bought her a phone that had his number programmed into it and blocked all others. He’d give it to her later tonight. Maybe that would cheer her up a little.