Villainous ways to capture a villain

( Where did he go?) Eve was clueless why Xaphael left just like that. She speculated that maybe the way she articulated her proposal wasn't earnest enough and irked him somehow. A sigh of exasperation filled the cabin. Why was it so hard to hook up? She shamelessly pondered.

( Host, he went to get a drink.)

The furball reported while watching the villain down a short glass filled with an amber liquid.

( Say, did I made a mistake in my proposition?)

( I think you did well, host. You should try again later.) Halfsie consoled the host's failed conquest sincerely. It knew Eve was trying to turn into reality the things they have "studied" together. Though it enjoyed all those films, Halfsie lacks the desire nor the pp to enact them. The best it could do is support the host and tell her of all the possible ways to enjoy them to her heart's content. Maybe by then, she'll bestow it with a reward. That idea fueled the furball's desire to master all the procreation-related scripts as soon as possible.

Eve assented with an exhausted hum and buried herself in the quilt once again. She didn't forget to take out a bar of chocolate for her to nib on. She felt hungry, but she's sleepy too. Thus, Eve decided to pad her stomach and feed her brain cells. She attributed the earlier defeat to her diminishing neuronal activity due to lack of sleep and insufficient glucose level.

***

[ What the heck happened back there?] Xaphael rubbed his forehead.

For the first time in his sixteen years of life, he fled due to a woman. A kid, rather. He, who doesn't even feel a shred of trepidation in the face of death, escaped so pathetically! He can't believe he'd be flustered like that. When he recalled what the mad girl has spouted, he felt his face get hot. How embarrassing!

" To think the so-called devil child will be perturbed like this." Xaphael hit the counter with his fist as he let out a peal of low laughter

As if finding his lost dignity, Xaphael finally reverted to his normal tranquil state. He then threw the awkward episode into the air and focused on matters that needed his attention.

Not long after, a thought popped out of nowhere disrupted his flow of ideas.

[ Would that kid be hungry?] After coming to a realization, his face turned dark.

[ It's not my problem.] He resumed back to his work, but a few minutes later, another notion distracted him.

[ It's been four hours since we're onboard.] Xaphael started calculating the hours Eve has been "kidnapped".

If he remembers correctly, his subordinates mentioned taking the car from the city then drove for a couple of hours to get to the rendezvous. Afterwhich, they found the slumbering kid on the innermost seat and didn't know how to handle the situation since they were running out of time. Considering the girl's quality, they decided to send her together with the package to please him. Such thoughtfulness almost made him suffer a hypertensive crisis.

Those numbskulls sent him a child knowing full well he's not interested in such debauchery. To top it all, they gifted him the coddled heiress of two powerful families. Do they want to send him to death? Sure he has his growing powers and not afraid to take them head-on, but he wouldn't want to risk such heavy casualty. Not to mention, he still needed to crush that person. Hence, he can only somehow try to minimize the consequences by fixing the "mistake". For that to happen, he needs that absurd girl's assistance. He received her full details and understood that her house heavily dotes on her. She's heavily spoiled without limits that even he thinks it's ridiculous.

[ Crazy girl from a crazy family.] He gave up resisting and decided to check on her once more. He can't starve her at the very least.

Xaphael knocked on the door but failed to receive a response. Like a chivalrous man that he is, he entered the cabin without second thoughts. What greeted him was a mound of blanket.

" Kid." He greeted but still didn't get a reply. His footsteps were light as he went on the bed's other side to get a closer look. There he saw a living burrito. Layers of blankets huddled Eve that she appears like in a cocoon. Upon closer look, there's an unfinished chocolate bar in her hand, still maintaining the posture of sending it to her mouth.

A chuckle escaped from Xaphael's throat.

[ Really. Still a child.] He wanted to take the sweet out of her hand lest it falls to the ground.

[ Where did she get this anyway?] He can't help but ponder. After all, it was a huge ass chocolate bar. A box lay on the floor measuring at least 2 feet in length, yet the one in her hand only has a foot-long remaining. His contemplation didn't last because he found out he can't take the bar away. Her tiny hand had held it with an iron grip. She simply refuses to let go.

The unexpected strength challenged him to pry open her fingers. He won't believe he's incapable of taking the damn sweet away. Contrary to his expectations, the young lady fully showcased her finger grip akin to a gorilla. The strife has already caused fine sweat to form on his forehead, but he won't back down.

Determination filled Xaphael's eyes as he climbed the bed with full intent on snatching the damn thing.

***

Eve is enjoying a peaceful afternoon. She's under the vast sky, enclosed by the sea flowers while munching on some yummy goodness. Then out of nowhere, the blue atmosphere turned dark, and the blossoms withered away. She felt heavy coercion fill the surroundings and made her anticipate for something unholy to arrive. Eve adjusted herself for the incoming invasion yet was surprised by a sneak attack. A demon has appeared right under her nose and dared to start with her food!

" You're courting death!" Eve held on to her snack as if her life depended on it. No way in hell is she going to let go.

Nevertheless, the monster was adamant about taking her treasure away. It forcefully yanked the goods from her. The unprecedented force almost felt like a wife trying to pull the mistress' scalp away. She didn't back down and protected her baby like a monk protecting his chastity. The tug of war continued into a deadlock. The demon's persistence has ultimately infuriated Eve. Her other hand seized the fiend's body and went for the kill with a crafty powerbomb. She pinned the scoundrel under her and decided to give it a ruthless lesson for messing with her snack. However, the damned creature was too powerful that she couldn't free her arms while restraining it. The urgent situation forced her to perform a desperate move to obliterate the sinner.

***

" ! " Xaphael was stunned when Eve suddenly grasped his clothes. Before he could respond, the slender body that has escaped from her pupa had grabbed both his shoulders and pushed him hard. The loss of balance caused him to fall back on the bed. The surprising move didn't end there. Shortly after, a warm body mounted his torso.

[ F*ck!] He struggled after the momentary shock, but the damn girl, who must have been possessed by the spirit of king kong, shackled both his arms.

" You dare provoke me? " A sonorous voice sounded above him. The lass' eyes were half-open, clearly not awake. Her demeanor was arrogant as if a goddess were looking down on a struggling ant. If it weren't for the chocolate crumbs on her lips, she could have been domineering.

Xaphael wanted to yell her name to wake her up, but a terrifying statement was proclaimed before he could.

" Should I torture you with my mouth?." She spoke such ambiguous words tenderly while smiling so enchantingly.

The young man can only stare at her alluring face as his reason try to work back online. Then he watches Eve lower her face to his. Still wearing a devilish grin, her cherry lips approached his ever so slowly that it rendered him paralyzed, only capable of breathing heavily.

***

Eve stretched her limbs as she yawned heartily. The unchanged view informed her that they are still currently flying.

[ I'm famished.] She rubbed her tummy, trying to appease the black hole inside.

[ I should have hoarded meals too, huh.] Eve can't help but regret storing snacks alone in the system space. She has never lacked a proper dish in the Tang mansion thus didn't prepare for emergency ration.

( Host! Host! You won't believe it!) An eager voice assailed her mind.

( What?) Eve licked her lips and wondered why she could savor an awful rust-like taste.

( Host! An hour ago I...) Halfsie wanted to share an impressive gossip with the host. It was such a piece of thrilling news that it wanted to let the host hang on the edge of her seat and feel the excitement.

Eve: ...

Eve stood up and hopped to the door. It's her first time moving without her wheelchair that her lazy ass had almost forgotten what it felt like to walk. She decided to practice walking again since soon she will have her cast off.

( Host! Come on! You guess!) The blabbermouth rattled in her consciousness while demanding stupid things. Eve was not interested in the slightest and focused on hopping towards her destination.

Eve reached the lounge and spotted her person of interest.

( Host! )

The furball's succeeding words were drowned in a sea of silence.

Eve put the high-pitch rattling creature on mute mode. Can she do that? No. But if she focuses on something with all her might, it turns out she can ignore the system guide who parasitize on her mind.

[ Even his back looks good.] She generously praised.

" El." A sweet voice successfully caught his attention.

[ Who's El?] Black lines formed on Xaphael's forehead. He glanced at the little girl, who appears as if she lacks combat power. Only he knew how horrifying her hidden strength is. Remembering that scene, his face became hot.

He let out an awkward cough and responded.

" Don't call me that." He took his gaze back and decided to ignore her.

" I want to give you a nickname so I'll call you that." Eve marched forward and unceremoniously occupied the seat in front of him.

" Why? We're not even close." His brows furrowed but didn't shoo her away.

" We'll be a lot closer." She beamed and enlightened her future partner.

[ Beside you wouldn't expect me to call you Xaphael throughout?] She was too lazy to articulate three syllables to utter his name.

Xaphael almost choked on his coffee when he heard her response. To think her brain is still filled with such ridiculous things. He sighed and decided not to intervene with her delusions. Treatment is a process anyway; it won't be gone after a few hours of sleep.

" If you're hungry just ask them to make it for you." He resumed his work and finally snubbed her existence.

" Will do." A delighted voice answered.

Then Xaphael watched his workplace be filled with different plates of food. From pancakes, slices of bacon, and different fruits to a bento box filled with different dishes. He felt the pantry was squandered to half. He doesn't mind her voracious appetite but was wondering if she could consume all that. His query was answered not long after as he watched her finish them all up to the final bite.

He was both worried and amazed by her unexpected feat. To think she managed to wipe them clean. Won't she get indigestion? Does she have two stomachs? Those questions filled his mind.

Eve dabbed her mouth with a napkin like an elegant, well-mannered lady. The many empty plates in front of her, however, remains proof of her gourmandizing session.

" El. What happened to your lips?" She had noticed it long ago but doesn't have spare energy to gossip about it.

The sudden inquiry rattled Xaphael into covering the evidence with his palm. When he realized his hasty action and the look of curiosity on her azure eyes, he calmed down.

[ She doesn't remember.] He was glad that was the case.

" I was caught in an unexpected brawl." It wasn't a lie. The matter earlier can be called a fight, a fight between his lips and her teeth. That shameful scenario burned his cheeks.

" Oh no!" The news baffled her into standing up to get a closer look at his handsome face.

" You should be careful you know!" Eve almost yelped when she finally checked how deep the wound on his swollen lips.

[ What do I do if you ruin your impeccable profile? ] She felt discomfort for nearly losing her one and only candidate.

Xaphael sat still, not knowing what to do. What should he do in this situation? He can see how genuinely worried she is for him. It's been so long since someone showed concern over his well-being. The feeling isn't bad, he mused.

After reassuring the other, Xaphael proceeded to discuss matters with Eve.

" I hope you could tell your family that it's just a misunderstanding." Xaphael put away his laptop and crossed his leg. He is clearly a teenager, but the aura emanating from him is far from what a boy will exude. Once solemn, he transforms into another person. A person who's 50% deadly and 50% charming ( and 100% more yum) Eve inwardly graded.

" Don't worry. I know exactly what to say."

" What will you say?"

" That I did not elope and will be back." Eve replied a matter-of-factly.

Xaphael felt an incoming terrible headache. He almost thought he'd suffer from a stroke.

[ What ludicrous idea.] Comprehending how overprotective those men were, Xaphael had a notion he'll near his death faster if she states it like that. For a moment, he even thought its better just to own up being a kidnapper.

" Don't. Don't do that." Xaphael almost pleaded. The lady gazed at him with questioning eyes, unaware of the frustration she had inflicted on him.

" State your condition."

Eve: ?

" I'll do anything as long as you persuade them not to prosecute this matter."

Then Xaphael watched Eve's eyes shine as if having an epiphany. He felt a disturbing conjecture and managed to stop the infernal words that might spout from her mouth.

" No." His decisive answer blocked the other's proposal.

Like an abandoned pup, he saw her vibrant blue lamps dim and her non-existent puppy ears down. Xaphael doesn't want to admit it, but at this moment, she looks adorable. The corner of his lip lifted without him noticing.

" I'll agree to anything except that." He decided to be magnanimous. The lass is innocently dragged into this whole mess because of him anyway.

" Anything?" In a flick of a switch, the gloomy person is no more.

Eve giggled, grasping full well she did the trick. According to the guidebook, " Ways to your Baes: 1000 ideas to get into his heart & pants" she has read, it stated the use of women's number one weapon- tears. At first, she wanted to shed tears, but shame, the best she could do is a forlorn look. Eve even had a notion the vessel body was born without tear glands. How else can she not effectively wring a drop of tear?

Xaphael has a disturbing conjecture part 2.

"Well, I do have a simple request." The devilish grin on her innocent face reminded him of the ordeal earlier. It was at that moment he knew he was duped.

***