Chapter 43.

It took days for the trio to be able to wiggle out of their beds and eat properly, still frowning and grimacing a lot at every move. Well, for Rose and Enora at least, Nick was still very much bedridden. But the tall warrior took care of him even after Rose could resume her self-given duty to heal others. The young woman felt quite surprised at this sudden change in the group dynamic, as the other woman could barely look at the man without contempt in her eyes just a few days prior. "Is he a hero now ?", asked she in her mind. In front of this interrogative look, the warrior blushed a little and explained herself while Nick slept.

- We talked a bit while you were recuperating …

...

- Would you stop looking at me like that sweetheart ?, he asked in a soft voice.

- Don't call me that., she answered harshly.

- Oh, come on ! Do you still think you are in the right … to hate or loathe me like that … for a feeling I had once a long time … ago ?

He let out many uncontrollable coughs among those words. She helped him drink a few mouthfuls of water before talking again.

- I did not mean to scare or anger any of you, and it is not my fault I found Rose cute.

- It's not about cuteness damnit !, blurted Enora. The things that came out of it are the problem. Doesn't matter if she is an adult or not, 'cause you were attracted to her anyway.

A few moments flew by in silence as both contemplated their situation.

- True enough., Nick continued. Maybe I'm a disgusting pig, but so much time passed between our encounter and the moment I heard her real age, and not a second was I interested in her again. I even did my best to keep away from her at first, afraid to scare her … what more could I have done ? Confess from the very beginning and end up alone ? What should I do now to deserve a little bit of forgiveness ? What would you have done ?

- I'm not disgusting like that., she mumbled.

- Easy to say. You're not even capable of understanding, but criticizing seems quite natural. I'll repeat what I said the other day : considering your own fucked up thoughts, you're quite the hypocrite to behave like that. I did nothing wrong. Thinking is not a crime.

...

- It got me wondering., concluded Enora. We've been harsh on him for something he did not 'do'. And maybe I'm more easily convinced in front of a very injured Nick, but still … he is not completely wrong. What do you think of it ?

Rose began staring at the ceiling. She did not know what to think really. When he had told them of this deep and shameful secret, he did it not only for his own sake but for them too. He did not want them to discover that kind of thing by themselves and make their situation even worse. The description of the Nexus of Minds definitely said that the mages attempting it should trust each other a lot, or it would turn their newly created mind into a very crazy place. Not warning them would have been a probable death sentence to all of them. "Is that an excuse though ? If we were not thinking of actually using such a Mystic Art, would it be forgivable ?", wondered she.

- I never hated him for it., the young woman confessed. I mean, beyond the first impression, he apparently did not feel attracted afterwards. You could call that an instinctive desire. And seriously, you think my exes were not affected in that manner ?

- Exes ?, pointed out Enora.

- Just because I don't remember doesn't mean I am not conscious of it. I mean, I don't feel like a stranger to that kind of relations. Condemning Nick for something that I have probably accepted before would indeed be hypocritical.

Did she accept it though ? She remembered vividly the jealousy she first felt when seeing Enora during bath time, so maybe she would have liked to look less juvenile. She immediately shared that sentiment.

- Well, I don't know what to say …, whispered Enora. It's … flattering in a way. To be honest, I always thought you were too cute for your own good.

They both laughed light-heartedly, a little bit relaxed concerning this bothering matter. It would, of course, take more time to come to terms with it, but that was a good start.

When Nick next woke up, they shared with him their thoughts, or, more precisely, Rose's conclusions. He looked quite relieved about this development and smiled at them before resting more. His injuries were quite important. Even with his own light magic constantly healing him, he could barely move to eat. However, it did not help that the only food they had was the Ash Troll's meat. "As disgusting as the Grey Devils …", thought Rose with a grimacing face.

Only after a week did they all feel decidedly better, actually sitting their hematoma ridden bodies around the fire. They had been talking a lot in the meantime, between the rests and healing sessions, and even Cultivation sometimes. This time was quite effective for all of them to wrap their minds around their deep perversions and disgraceful thoughts. Discussing seemed to be the best way to achieve that. Then, they began considering the Nexus of Minds again. Enora was still very much guarded, but Rose did her best in convincing her.

- Really though, if there is one moment where we should do it, it's now., said she. Like you said, we are not effective enough in fights, and the journey could last a lot longer. I fail to see a better alternative.

- Even then … the very thought of it is so uncomfortable.

- We're all uncomfortable and very conscious of why., noted Nick. Sacrificing the most basic intimacy for a practical gain … You'd have to be a sociopath not to be afraid.

It was true. Any normally developed person would feel frightened at the very idea even if their life was in the balance. Natural reaction.

- It only boils down to one thing really : are you ready to bet on our current abilities to get out of this place., simply put the man.

Enora took some time to ponder on the matter and finally sighed.

- No.