Author's note :
This chapter contains self harm and suicidal thoughts etc. These are considered sensitive topics so read only if you're comfortable with such topics.
The song : invisible by 5sos.
Play it while you read the chapter.
Your pov :
I'm sorry.
That was the last thing I wrote on the piece of paper that was ment to be my suicide note, I felt the tears roll down my cheeks and onto the table. I stared blankly at the One Direction poster on the wall beside the clock that read 8pm.
"I'm sorry, I won't make it" I mumble as though the posters could hear me.
I decide to take a few moments to just cry when I heard a knock on the door. I decided to ignore it and wait for the person to leave.
The knocking continued when I finally gave up and shouted
"NOT NOW" I yelled trying to make it seem as though I wasn't crying for hours.
"Let me in, it's Ashton" I heard his voice.
"NOT FUCKING NOW ASH!"
"I called you, and texted you. I'm worried are you ok?!" He asked
"FUCKING LEAVE ASHTON!" I said as my voice cracked
"Have you been crying?" he asks me through the door.
I didn't have a reply.
"Ash please leave" I practically begged him to leave
"I won't until you let me in and tell me what's wrong"
"FOR FUCKS SAKE ASHTON LEAVE!" I said almost growling.
I didn't hear a sound, he left. I hurt him, urgh I have to find him. I washed my face and ran outside to find Ashton. I messed up. I dont want to leave this world with my favourite person mad at me.
I find Ashton sitting on a park bench, it was fairly close to my apartment.
"I'm sorry" I mumble to Ash as I sit beside him.
"What's wrong?" He asked looking into my eyes
"When you knocked, I was about to kill myself" I stated as the tears started falling
"Why didn't you tell me?" He asked as I heard his voice crack
"I was scared"
"It would hurt me if you left" he said
All I did was hug Ashton.
"I'm here for you, don't let go" he says hugging me back.
"Fuck I ruined your shirt with my tears" I replied as we pulled away from the hug
"It's fine" he says wiping my tears gently.