The past is back to haunt me

Uhg...my heart just fell to my stomach , seeing Africa just made me sick. Africa is my ex-girlfriend. Africa and I were together for a  satisfactory six months , our relationship ended because she cheated on me. Seeing her walk into class turned my world  upside down . I thought I'd never have to see her again.

I heard she left the school and I haven't seen her in a good three months, but now she is back , back to bother my peace. Looking  at her gives me mixed emotions. I'm happy and unhappy to see her but her presence sort of disgusts me. I think it is the fact that she cheated on me is why I feel the disgust. She looks beautiful. She has a huge Afro that looks like a lion's maine , her lips are glossed and her coffee colored skin looks flawless. She is dressed in a black, short and silky dress  and boots . She looks stunning . It's a shame we aren't together anymore. My eyes follow her as she looks for a seat in the class. There is a free seat next to me, I don't and Do want her to sit next me. She pulls the seat next to  me and sits down .My heart jumped when she sat next to me. I don't know whether my heart jumped for joy or fear, I think it was both.

This has to be the worst day ever , my unpleasant backstabbing ex-girlfriend just walked back into my life while I'm stuck in a tedious maths class .  My maths class always has a funny stench of samosas for some odd reason, the walls are baby blue and covered in an unusual large amount of mathematical equations. As I am staring at Africa  in astonishment , in the background there is my very loud maths teacher,Mr Ross. His  very deep and loud voice gives me a headache and all the maths equations on the walls make me feel unsteady.

I do not  know whether  to greet her or act like she is not there, and suddenly she greets me. She let out a big smile when she greeted me. Her teeth are white and straight with an attractive gap on her top row of teeth . I greet her back with a short grin  . Her warm greeting actually made me sort of happy to see her again but I still uncontrollably feel disgust deep down inside . How can she act as if nothing happened?

The lesson goes on and comes to an end. I stand up and pack my stationary into my school bag . I want to walk away because I don't want her to get the idea that I have forgotten about the backstabbing deed she did to me ,so I walk away and she doesn't stop me . I exit the class bewildered because I expected her to call me or stop me but she did not and that hurt.

Seeing Africa again has really put me in an agonizing position. I was really doing well emotionally . I don't like the way she makes me feel. My hands burn up as if my blood is be boiling  within my hands and my heart skips a beat every time I see her and for her this whole thing seems like a  zephyr. I wish she could teach me how to be so nonchalant as she is. Does that mean she is unapologetic for what she did?