52. On the Way

My life is starting to take more and more strange directions.

Some time ago, it would have been unthinkable for me to share my living space with someone else, let alone go with someone somewhere, especially for a long time.

Once upon a time, I was happily alive in my own little lonely world, still focusing on my own demons, cherishing them like the most expensive precious stones.

I was plunging myself in my illusionistic desire for what I want to be and how my true self differs from it, feeling self-loathing and a kind of fear that someone will see me without all my masks and see all of me. 

Including my scars and all these things, which in my opinion, not this perfect image which I want, and it is only which be the awful truth, which can bring only disgust...

Now my thoughts are different.

They don't focus on these things that were so important and absorbing to me before, as if it all suddenly passed away, and that's what's weird to me.